Last update to this website was at December 18 2025 9:28 PM Check bottom of page for my books Naga Tales and Laurence of India! LOI chapter 3 part 2 out now!

Gaming is king, it is the greatest thing that I know, there's nothing better in this world. I am Plootonius "Rudy" Brown and I am a profound jenius of the times. I am 18 years old and a force to be reckoned with. My politics are simple. The more creative the political solution, the better it is. And don't go around saying that "Oh if we add zoos, Santa, and hotter female teachers to schools, that will be the most creative solution" No, that isn't creative, it's just adding random stuff. Here is my true creative solution to make schools better. Turn it into a Metaverse. What does making it a metaverse solve? It's obvious what it solves. Why do we even need a real building? And this metaverse will have a time travel feature so you can see previous lessons. So easy of a solution. Why haven't they turned school into a metaverse already? And incorporate video games to the school lessons. Gaming is the future of human thought and it is a force to be reckoned with just like me. Anti-gaming is one of the most anti-intellectual movements of our time. This is a sign of fascism, these anti-gamers. And who would know, so many communists call gaming as a whole "slop". Just go and tell them to play Ghosts N Goblins Resurrection. Oh wait they'd call it slop because the game advertises itself as a nostalgic game. Well how come Boards of Canada can act so nostalgic and Ghosts N Goblins Resurrection can't. Damn my life and screw this damn world. I am banned from Rateyourmusic.com. And why? I was defending an album I liked from memers. I'm tired of these memey jeebies types of people. MEMEY JEEBIES!!!!! EEK!! SQUEAL!!! Hehe. Oh you know I did squeal in the school hallways running once. I'm not lying. But that got me put in a hospital. I'm dead fucking serious. Well they thought I lost my mind. But I was just bored and tired of acting like a hero all the time. Well they still thought of me as a hero after my disruption. I was even going to walk inside some random classrooms. So that is a political problem, you get banned from important websites too easily and you get put in hospital for acting weird too easily. In this cruel world, there's no freedom unless you are neurotypical enough to know how to break the rules without getting banned. And damn it, I was a kid then and I'm banned from many websites for silly mistakes. Damn cruel world... It's not fair... But hey, who cares. Humanity is a very primitive species. Aliens must be superior to us. Even fictional aliens such as Klingons are superior even though they are depicted as an equal species. Klingons are superior due to the fact that they don't have lame stuff like advertisements of some old lady on a white background and she's going around touching her hip. Damn it, who cares about that crap. And those TV ads, watched some old lady talk and I thought she would have the gruffiest voice because I was watching it mute. But she had the highest pitched voice ever when I watched it. Damn it, these ads are breaking the rules and they are doing it to demoralize us. Oh you assumed their voice would be deep. GUESS WHAT, IT'S NOT. You're an idiot for thinking that, and you have no problem solving skills. I know what you're thinking, most people don't even watch TV muted. There must be at least a million people who watch muted with subtitles sometimes. And guess what, the demoralization will happen to them. Fuck that. Klingon culture would never do something like that. They're warriors, not going to be advertising lame stuff. I haven't watched that much Star Trek episodes. I'd watch more if Pluto TV didn't show the same ones of Deep Space Nine at the same time every week. I don't even know how it does that because there is more than 7 days worth of episodes. Since there's more than 7 days of episodes, shouldn't it be showing a different episode every week at the same time?! Damn it I don't want to watch that show during gaming time.

Links, You'll have to copy and paste. I used to know HTML.

https://backloggd.com/u/PlootoniusBrown/

https://www.albumoftheyear.org/user/plootoniusbrown/

https://x.com/HerinBob46938

https://www.youtube.com/@Zhamashura

Favorite songs list: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1FGaxRLDzhxjjEqH_ovfbeqa6PYUzPldHvBXe9Q-05WQ/edit?tab=t.0

https://letterboxd.com/CriticOfPloo/

Norman F Rockwell review. Melody analysis: Sounds like they're using melodies they came up with in the shower when they were 5. Running out of shower melodies I suppose. Lyrics analysis: Uses the same language as a typical story over gameplay gamer, using the word manchild which is a word well associated with story gamers who call people who like gameplay focused games a manchild. Pathetique use of language, and it is a mind killer. Instruments analysis: An album like this should be doing more stuff off key. The album Not Available by The Residents wouldnt be so beautiful if it wasnt sounding like it was sang by aliens and played on alien synths. The truth is that if you want an emotional album, you probably have to be more alien. Humans dont cut it in this slick world. Its tough break for a human. Got a bone to break, and a job to say. But hey, thats not cutting it. Sorry pal, I dont make the rules. Humanity may have some good works that show the beauty of humanity such as the video game "The Wonderful 101" but this album kinda shows the opposite of the heroes in that games story. And I know what youre thinking, oh now I like story in games. Well I like the gameplay better. Vocals analysis: Sounds too much like a teacher. Also she looks like a teacher. Why do we have to look like teachers. Just look like a mountain man. Seriously. Too much vocalizing but fails to learn from Jon Anderson who did it better and I once considered ranking his best vocalizations. Seriously people make fun of jazz music for noodling, but this vocals is just noodling often times with boring resolutions. Lyrics analysis 2: Quite degenerate now that I actually read some lyrics. And don't think I'm some kind of antisexual here. But damn this is the lyrics of someone who doesn't believe in aliens. Because if you believed in aliens, wouldn't you be a little bit more damn appropriate?! They're not going to fake your death and turn you into one of them if you act like this. And don't act like Earth is better. There's so many improvements that can be made to a body. Cybernetics is never coming at this rate. And if they do, they aren't going to people who truly deserve it. And don't think I think I deserve it yet. I haven't made my video game yet so I have much to prove. These lyrics make me scared for humanity. I doubt people treat these lyrics like they are observing an alien. Or should they feel like an alien observing a human?! Melody analysis 2: It is just silly imagining people getting emotional to this noodling with the voice. The vocalizing tries to vaguely disguise the fact they are vocalizations that have no meaning. They feel embarrassed to do what Jon Anderson did much better in Yes in the 1970s. Vocalizations in popular music is associated with hippies. Rey seems to be anti-hippie despite having similar opinions to the worst of hippies. OH MAMA SOMEONE RUBBED A HIPPO'S CLIT! This is the sign of a hypocrite... They seem to be anti-history and probably disrespect the Pawn Stars for the wrong reasons. Inspirations: This album is inspired by Radiohead with the song titled "How to disappear" having a similar title to a Radiohead song. Advice: Make the vocals sound more alien or crazy if you want to be emotional. Instrumentation could be more interesting and lean in on more psychedelic elements since this is a semi-hippie album. Lyrics could be kid friendly since they already are kid friendly except for mentions of sexual intercourse. If they go for the kid friendly route, perhaps make a song that a kid would like by having it have a playful tone and less bored vocals. Make the lyrics use less toxic cringe. I swear I accidentally jumped in a vat of toxic cringe here when I saw the geniuses tell me the lyrics. Conclusion: Norman F Rockwell is a shoddy album made by a hippie in denial who seems to be afraid of acting full-on hippie and goes around doing halfhearted vocalizations while using language that sounds like those of story gamers.

Sex fans are degenerates… Wanking it to people you know in real life… Seriously that is horrible. You’re coming up with dialogue that they say and you’re putting words in their mouth. Or if you have no dialogue, they’re just soulless and it’s still an insult. Don’t play puppet show with humans that aren’t famous… Well you can do it to some random person you don’t know. It’s a decent idea to just find a random photo and not even know where it came from or who it is. Maybe they’re famous. Maybe they’re soulless, demonic and sinister. Maybe they’re a hero. Well… If you know them you know it just doesn’t make sense. And if they’re famous, well do some research on what they act like and make sure it’s logical that they would want to bang you. I bet you people aren’t very charming unlike mwah. And I know what you’re thinking, what if you’re a kid. Most people aren’t pedophiles so they wouldn’t bang you. Welp… People under age 20 can do whatever with this. But to 20 and above, you have to try to be a charming person. I know what you’re thinking, be charming just to talk to some imaginary people. Well the real people aren’t as good as the imaginary people. And in your imagination they look better than they ever will in any photo unless you forgot what they looked like. I cant believe sex fans just jack it to people they know in real life. With famous people, they should know this would happen unless they weren’t thinking clearly. With a picture you found randomly and dont know where it came from or who it is, its best not to know. But just use the pictures for your imagination. Don’t look at the picture for a long time. Only at most 10% of the time you should be looking at a picture. I dont know… I feel like humanity is just horrible. So much bad music people listen to. Come on I looked at people posting their favorite albums. Not a single one of my top 5 albums was on their lists and I saw 50 peoples list. At least I saw Soft Machine Third, Mothers of Invention We’re Only In It For The Money. That was on the social board of 4chan. And the ones who had good albums on their list, it was surrounded by albums I dont care about. Well Im not going to talk to somebody who only has 1 album I like on their list. Maybe I should listen to more albums. I’ve been listening to new albums a lot the best 2 weeks. Music addiction is probably worse than gaming addiction because music is more pleasurable without any pushback. A game has challenge. And sandbox games, well they arent that addicting and at least you use your imagination a little bit. But I guess theres gacha games, I dont know how challenging they are. But I did hear that Genshin Impact has a card game in it that is better than the actual game and the game deserves respect for having that card game in it. Well, gacha games arent all that bad I guess. But still… You know that Southeast Asians get stereotyped for playing gacha games. They are the most oppressed race. Black people get stereotyped for liking SNK and anime fighters. Wow so much better right. Fine, they do get stereotyped for liking sports games too. But sports games used to be good it seems like, but I barely played them except for SSX 3 or racing games and they don’t count because they don’t have balls. But I guess they play the new sports games and not the old ones. Well… I dont know. Well I see people say black people are the most oppressed. I dont know, theres a good argument suggesting Southeast Asians are. And other Asians are oppressed too but I dont think they get called Gacha games fans as much. Sorry for this political incorrectness. I dont mean to offend. And honestly I dont really care if we’re oppressed really. We’re not oppressed that much. And its fun to be a race like this. If I had to choose a race to be, I would choose Vietnamese definitely. Its like choosing Argonian in Morrowind. And we can debate which Elder Scrolls race is most like what human race. But yeah I dont really like that Argonians cant wear boots. I wouldnt choose Argonian because I need those boots of blinding speed. I guess Wood Elf is the next best choice, they are a very much hated race in Elder Scrolls. And I know what youre thinking. Maybe Indians are more oppressed actually. Well fine… Maybe they are. I was insulting HealthyGamerGG today because his videos are just horrible. Theyre boring and this guy isnt really telling you anything really helpful at all. Hes no hero, lets say that much. And he keeps talking about people who have porn addictions, come on dood, leave them. They are god damn lost cause. If they look at the home page of xvideos and think, “This is arousing” They are too far gone. Its just horrible and not arousing at all. And maybe there is a decent video on xvideos home page, but decent doesnt cut it. Just use your imagination. And be a charmer in your imagination and dont imagine yourself banging hoors. Nobody is handsome enough for a respectable girl to just want to bang you for that. And I know what youre thinking, oh but Im jacking it to some person just because they look attractive. Well lets just say females are more attractive than males. And yeah the word female, people get angry if you say female. I say male too. And damn it, I hate saying the word men and women. Dont you realize kids dont like saying the words men and women. Im only 18 so Im still close to a kid. Saying the words men and women just makes you sound like an adult who is trying to act like some sociopolitical genius. Yeah lets just say that saying the word men and women sounds more pretentious than saying male and female. Anyway these sex fans are god damn idiots. I used to be antisexual because I god damn hated all these idiots being annoying. With sexual intercourse, you cant be elitist because everybody does the same positions and even if you do obscure positions, theres probably annoying people doing that. With games and music, you can be elitist because some games are too hard for people or they care too much about aesthetics or story and some of the best games dont appeal to people because of their aesthetics or story or lack of story. For music, well I cant really explain why people dont like the same music I do. But jeez these sex fans are so idiotic. Hell I wouldnt even be a sex fan if I was ashamed of myself. But dont think Im saying sex haters are ashamed of themselves. They have every right to hate it or jacking it. But these people should be ashamed of themselves, many sex fans. Acting like theyre normal for jacking it to people they know. Come on… If you think youre normal, whats an alien? Is an alien not normal?! Damn it, nobody is normal. So stop going around acting like anything is normal. Fine… I dont really know any girls thats really attractive and has a good personality that I am aware of. Because seeing girls in hallways, you dont really know what theyre like. You know I saw two girls talking and one of them was asking if the other one was doing a Napoleon Bonaparte impression. Well seems like some cool people. You dont really see cool people that often. But Im not jacking it to them… And hell I did think the girl who did the impression though I didnt hear the impression, was cool looking. But Im not jacking it to her damn it. Thats disrespectful. And I know what youre thinking, what if one of these girls are doing it to me. Well girls can do it I guess if theyre cool enough. The problem is that these people who arent cool enough are jacking it to people that are much cooler than them. Seriously, what a god damn farnickle. And yes, farnickle is my made up word. Its apparently a grandmas name in South Park. I did watch that episode before but I wonder if I remembered it or if I came up with the word myself. Farnickle, just imagine that word means something like explosion. And I know what youre thinking, well do I think Im not cool enough so thats why Im not jacking it to them. Well lets just say girls can jack to people they know but males cant. But that doesnt mean any girl can. They have to be cool and have a good sense of what cool is. Oh fine… Theres no way of deciding who is truly cool or not. Well damn it… Then I guess nobody can jack it to other people. Damn it, everybody has to be a cool person! Im tired of you people acting uncool. Ive had it! But anyway do sex haters have a good reason to hate sex? Well yes. If you look at all the damn sex fans, its no surprise people hate sex or jacking it. And anyway I dont really plan of having hex. Maybe if I find someone cool enough. Well.. Looks like its too late since Im done with school. College probably has too many degenerates. Damn it. Im writing a novel Mortis The Vanquisher. It takes place in college. Well its my parody of a college of a different timeline. Alright its November 1 2025 1:32 PM. Well now I realize the absurdity of caring about what albums people listen to. Well I dont know. Im not really moved by the music I saw on the 4chan social board posting albums. And honestly that social board is filled with degenerates posting their wieners. Their wieners dont look as cool as mine. I dont know if Im biased but mine has soul. So yeah I probably got lucky here. Im not bragging because I didnt even do anything to get a cooler looking one. Yeah people will say the dimensions are what matters. Well mine is above average, and well lets not be so specific. Fine girls are reading this so maybe they would like to know. Well youre a damn pervert. But jeez… Mine looks very cool, lets just say that. We dont need to talk about dimensions because how it looks is more important. I dont care about breast size, it just has to look cool. And yeah lets just state the obvious. Sexual intercourse has more in common with Geometry Dash than deeper video games. Geometry Dash isnt that good of a game because its just one button and you time the presses. Sure theres some physics with the ship, but this game is just an inferior version of Super Monkey Ball, an inferior version of rhythm games, and dont get me started on the Geometry Dashers who mock Super Mario Maker because they think the editor in Geometry Dash is better just because you can decorate stuff better and do some coding. Well it is more impressive of an editor, but doesnt make for more interesting gameplay. Even the levels that use coding and play like a different game, these tend to be just clones of existing games and theyre not as good as the real thing. So its not really worth playing. Geometry Dash is pretty much just a game you play to get rid of your erection. So funny that the game that is similar to sexual intercourse just happens to be a game that you play to do the opposite. Yeah… Thats an absurd phenomenon. But it shows the beauty of life. You know I did give my Geometry Dash one word username to some guy that beats extreme demons. I dont know if I should have done that. That guys the same age as me. He didnt give me any money though he joked he would pay me. Welp… Well people seem to think Im a crazy person. Either that or say they love me because of my funny charms. Well… Dont be afraid to say your opinion to me. You can contact me at my discord which is vandergraafgenerator, yeah its literally the bands name. What a namesnipe. So many discord users, not a single one went for that namesnipe before me. Shows you how folly the average Discord user is. So add me if you want. If youre a philosopher ready to critique my philosophy on this website and also in my novel Mortis The Vanquisher, go ahead. And be sure to point out some plot holes and inconsistencies in the story if there are any that you can spot. Spot the rot… The phrase “spot the rot” has significant meaning. Most people cant spot the rot. Theyre on xvideos jacking it to those horrendous videos. Theyre watching HealthyGamerGG. I dont really like HealthyGamerGG. He tries to help people with porn addictions. He never even tells you his opinion on m-bating to your imagination. That says a lot about him and his m-bating habits. Well Ive been wondering if m-bating to your imagination is a bad idea. You cant trust sex fans saying its a good thing to do because theyre jacking it to people they know. And I know what youre thinking, well I just need to know more attractive female people in real life and I’d be jacking it to them right. Come on… Dont put words in their mouth in your head. Youre imagining them moaning. Jeez dood… So egotistical you people are. And I know what youre thinking, oh and youre not egotistical saying your wiener is the only cool looking one you ever seen. Well thats my personal opinion. These people just have dumb looking stuff. Yeah mine has green veins visible. Thats why its cool. Ok?! Green is a great color. In fact I am always saying the word green in my head. Saying the name Gary Green because it has alliteration. Talking about green beans because they rhyme. Green just a great word and the color is great too. Yeah a doctor said I have great veins. Aint that awesome. And sorry if I seem too egotistical. This is my website anyway and you dont have to read it. Yeah I always wanted to be a controversial person for absurd reasons. Most controversial people have some unoriginal politics which is what makes them controversial. Thats a snoozefest and they are getting hated on and it wasnt even worth it because they arent laughing when someone gets angry at them. Who even cares. If they are laughing, its a boring laugh of a non-multidimensional layered kind. These people have no joy in life. But m-bation, well is it a bad idea? Well the fact you have to clean up your jizz makes it seem like one. Of course you can get a vasectomy or take a medication that has retrograde ejaculation as a side effect. Welp… People say they feel lonely in life and HealthyGamerGG is trying to talk to them. I never felt lonely in my life except when I was in a hospital with some freaks. Theres aliens anyway and they might be watching us with telescopes and binoculars that can see far away and through walls. They might really admire some of us humans. HealthyGamerGG seems kinda sinister and he just mentions memes to relate to the youth. Dont even try relating to these memey jeebies people. And I dont relate to any of the problems he is trying to help people with. Eh I cant suggest any topics. But this guy is just phony and he needs to specify what games he likes because the term gamer is just too vague and can mean anything. How do we know this guy isnt an idiot gamer. And this guy makes too big a deal about getting in a romantic relationship. As if we should be jealous of his romantic relationship, seems like a boring one. This guy is just not relatable at all and he tries to be. And this guy says “Youre not solving problems in real life but in a fantasy world” Alright seems like this guy hates the idea of Ikolatia and its politics in my novel Mortis The Vanquisher. Isnt it much more logical for you to be fighting your crops which have been turned into violent but weak (though hard to kill) living things to get stronger instead of lifting weights? Lifting weights is the equivalent of grinding in an RPG. Its bad game design. And besides… High-tech weapons that are hard to use are the best thing we can have for defense. The weapon would be like trying to control something from NASA. We need better defenses for our bodies. Gunshots are too powerful but require not as much skill to use. Not high-tech enough… We need super awesome fights where you can just run so fast that it is hard to attack the enemy. Heres my idea for a high-tech weapon. A weapon where you have to aim the rocket in mid air. So you move the rocket. Im pretty sure this already exists. But dood, imagine some guy running like a cheetah because he has high-tech boots and trying to manuever a speedy rocket at him. This is what combat should be in real life. Something more intellectual. I guess fighting hand to hand has many techniques and strategies. But whats stopping them from bringing a gun. We need everything to be high-tech. And I know what youre thinking, just nuke them or get some weapon that aims with extreme precision automatically. Damn it… I hate so many sex fans… They are the scum of the Earth. The sex subreddit is the most degenerate people I ever seen. Acting like theyre so friendly and civilized. How can we even live on as humans. Some alien species probably dont even bang for any purpose. I cant live with these people… This is much more annoying than those commercials with some old lady talking something boring. Its boring, it makes you ashamed to be human, alien species dont have to put up with this nonsense.

SEX TOYS MAKE NO SENSE… Damn it… I thought the whole point of banging was to act like a caveman. High-tech gear has NO PLACE IN M-BATION OR BANGING. God damn idiots… It’s the ultimate contradiction to use sex toys. And I know what you’re thinking, OH BUT YOU COULD PRETEND TO BE A CAVEMAN WHO WAS GIVEN A DEVICE BY A TIME TRAVELLER. Damn it, I don’t like time travel that much as a concept. And neither should you. And what kind of time traveller goes “Hey look you idiot, here’s a damn toy. Put it on your wiener.” That’d be a damn pervert! I can’t believe you people. Buying your children a sex toy instead of a god damn Rubik’s cube. It’s horrendous. Stop acting like sexual intercourse is an intellectual activity. Being the charmer in order to get to that point is the intellectual activity. But I guess many people who arent even charming are getting to bang anyway because people have low standards. Great job humanity, you just reward mediocrity. It beats the whole point of the game. Everybody has god damn low standards. I’m tired of you idiots going around letting the mediocrity win… Its like a game thats too easy so you ignore the mechanics to make it harder. Thats bad game design… And it seems like a strategy is phonying it up saying you like Drake’s music so you can bang. Come on… Though lets just say Drake music fans are not that attractive at least from the ones I saw in school hallways who claimed to like Drake. Maybe Nick Drake music fans are more attractive because his music is better. Lying is not the type of charming we want to be doing. But Its possible theres at least one attractive girl who listens to Drake at least occasionally. And when I say attractive, I dont mean decent. Welp… Its a god damn problem that the body and the mind isnt as connected as you’d hope. But the people on Sea of Tranquility’s In The Prog Seat act like they look. You can tell which ones of them would hate Pawn Hearts or Third just by looking at them, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O8b0UIwwvTg A good test of human appearance and the connection of that with their taste in music. There’s even more stuff that seem like exactly the thing the person who looks like that would say. The guy who says Genesis We Cant Dance is an album they cant stand looks exactly like the guy who would say it for the show, though probably not the best pick for the show because its not really a progressive rock album though made by a former progressive rock band. Guess which one has Emerson Lake and Palmer as their favorite band. Guess which one would choose Ummagumma as one that they hate (And guess which one would state his opinion that the live album on Ummagumma makes it good). Guess which one hates Piper of the Gates of Dawn (Maybe not that obvious). Well dont think that I dislike any of these people for disliking Pawn Hearts by VDGG or Third by Soft Machine, two of my most favorite albums.. So hmm.. Maybe there is a possibility that no very attractive female (Someone you’d want to marry and bang everyday (If you like the idea of marriage)) listens to bad music. Thats interesting and I hope its true. I hope God made the coolest people the most attractive (To my eyes anyway and to the eyes of girls who are cool). But I dont know… Am I really that cool looking? Well I have some pretty good pictures taken of myself. Though people (Hopefully female) wont be jacking it to them because theyd be a semi pedophile for doing that since Im 17 in my best picture though only 13 days away from being 18. Also is the term “jacking it” gender neutral. Well I’ll keep saying it as if its a gender neutral term. Eh I might not be the most attractive but I have soul in the way I look anyway. You look at me and you can tell “This guy has a soul.” And actually a picture of me at 14 years old looks better than the one at 17. It just has better lighting. Eh I think my iPad camera probably isnt even that good so thats probably the problem with the pictures. Eh but I dont look soulless. You go to the subreddit r/toocuteforporn, Guess what all the girls there are egotistical calling themselves cute. They look soulless. And dont think I went there to jack it. I went there to see how soulless people look, even ones that are considered to be cute. But perhaps I should go to a subreddit with no nudity because the people who make pictures or videos of nudity for non artistic purposes, seem to be soulless. I dont know… I just think a lot of people look soulless. This is just the statement of a person who doesnt like humanity that much and thinks many alien cultures are probably better. Humanity might be the laughingstock of the entire universe. I got called an incel for saying I wasnt attracted to some conventionally attractive person on Twitter. Well the point of the post was a comparison by two plain looking people of different races. The one who the poster implied was unattractive had a gummy smile. Come on… I dont see why people like these conventionally attractive looking people for the most part. They look soulless and arent going to make your heart beat fast when you hear them talk like some girls I knew in school. Not cute at all these people on r/toocuteforporn. And I dont really care to be called incel because its never some genius calling you that. In fact the people who insulted me had horrible taste in video games with games like Royale High from Roblox (This girl said I was gay for saying I was more attractive than the girl. Its like they assume youre anti-gay even though you never said anything that implied that. They think everyone belongs to one of a few groups and nobody is original), the newer Assassins Creed games (Not the one with the black guy in Japan though, seems like this guy thinks Assassins Creed was a game with Christian themes, I couldnt tell you if it does or doesnt but people always say theres no good Christian video games so probably not (And that doesnt mean I think Assassins Creed is good, I never played it but not interested(), Animal Crossing New Horizons (Pretty limited sandbox, not much to really do), a Gacha game where you collect feminine males… (I doubt this gacha game has the excuse that some Genshin Impact fans have, which is the fact that Genshin Impact has a card game in the game that is better than the actual game and thats why the game should be considered great). And I had a Wonderful 101 profile picture when I said that. Come on… So idiotic… And we can talk about the compliments girls gave me in school. I was complimented by many girls I didnt like in school and complimented by a girl I liked a lot but lost interest in. I had a fashionable hairstyle on accident for a brief time, its just long hair covering your eyes. Males liked to insult me for this and made a big deal about my hairstyle that I shouldve just cut the front hair. I wanted long hair but I never cut the bangs. Wow… Im quite the opposite of an incel because incels are complaining about girls who dont like being complimented by males they dont like. But damn it, I cant believe humanity has so many soulless looking people. And dont think that just because the only girls I mentioned that I thought looked cute were from my days in school means Im a pedophile. Because its not even true that the only girls I think looked cute were from my days in school. Well you can theorize who I think looks cute who are famous and adults. Well… All I got to say is a lot of people look soulless. And the soulless people will go around saying that YOU are an NPC. Just ignore those people who try hard to be funny and be your friend. Youre cooler than them. They dont know anything. They listen to bad music. They think theyre cool and they wear AirPods and have it playing a song with a boring drum beat that you can hear. They have no damn soul, they see a person with soul, they feel threatened. They say the word NPC but when the teacher says they liked roleplaying games (Which is where the term NPC comes from, though Im not the biggest fan of RPGs really but you should at least know of their existence) when they used to play video games, they think hes a guy who puts on cat ears and roleplays sexually. So many idiots at schools… Dont even try to be friends with them. And theres some decent people there at school. But seems like the best you can get for a friend in school these days is a Geometry Dash fan. Well fine, some guys mentioned Metal Gear Solid and Devil May Cry. The past few days I havent really been playing games for more than an hour. Ive been thinking about the world we live in… MY WIENER IS SO MORE SOULFUL THAN OTHER PEOPLES. Is this proof that God is on my side?! But damn it, we all know humans DONT CARE ABOUT THE DAMN SOULFULNESS. If they did, The Singing Resident (Best singing is on the album Not Available by The Residents) and Peter Hammill (Best singing is in the band Van der Graaf Generator) would be considered the best singers by the masses because their vocals have the most emotion. And dont get me started on the ladies wanted to be banged by old dirty bastards, and no Im not talking about the rapper. Welp it seems like soulful people like me who is a soul brotha of the extreme aren’t as well liked by the masses as you’d hope. And I guess people want a big wiener, not a soulful looking one. Damn you idiots. You’d shove the worlds biggest poop up your body if it wouldnt break, well old poop from millions of years ago doesnt break so easily. And dont think Im insulting black people… They can be quite cool. But it seems like the black people that people have fetishes for arent the same black people who are playing anime fighters or making jazz music. Seriously, this is not fair. And I know what youre thinking, why talk about all these sexual degenerates with weird fetishes. Welp… I needed to know what weird freaks the world has in it. Im interested in learning about this time period that we live in and what is happening in it. But yeah, it seems like people dont even like people that are cool as hell. People say Captain Beefheart has the worst vocals they ever heard. So they probably also think Howlin Wolf has bad vocals too. So many idiots… This whole world is a playground to be more elite than other people. Social media is an egregious opinion scavenger hunt. The purpose of life is to just act more elite than other people. Its too easy because everybodys so phony. Well.. Its time to go to Imaginationland and ignore real life. Peace. Is God on my side? I just measured my wiener, 6.5 inches. Woooooooo. And I might not even had been fully erect. Woo. But I guess 6.5 isnt good enough for many of you. Welp… What can I say. I dont really care. Because it isnt the size that matters, but its HOW COOL IT LOOKS. And I know what you say, its skill that matters, not the size, and also my size is not that impressive. Welp… Im not bragging. And sorry to all ladies reading this if you think Im egotistical. But it needs to be said. The stereotypes of certain people having small wieners needs to be disproven. And honestly its not like its the greatest news to have an above average one. So many idiots like to just bang anyone just so they can get reactions of people seeing their wiener. Why even do that when you can watch a classical composer listen to progressive rock on YouTube. You’ll get a more interesting reaction. Not that its the most interesting type of video in the world. So many sex fans are soulless. I’ve looked at sex videos on Reddit, they are all filled with soulless looking people. I just watch them to mock it. No pants down. So many idiotic sex fans… Ive had it with these soulless people. They arent going to make it to heaven. You know why? Because they dont have any fun. You need to pass a fun quota in life in order to make it to heaven. Otherwise youre just a downer to all the people in heaven. They think they have fun. And guess what, many “less of a thinking man” gamers are getting to go to heaven because they had fun from playing games like Slay The Spire, one of the few games they play that is actually good. But because it was good and they had fun with it, theyre going to heaven. These sex fans, well theyre not going to heaven. Everything theyve ever done is SOULLESS. Alright… Am I weird?! Well its official. IM WIERD!!!.No… Im trying to be a good relatable person in this world where theres too many enemies…. And anyway… Im looking for a girl who is cool, not phony, not sinister, smart, has spunk, funny, not that interested in politics (Too boring to be too into it), likes the album Not Available by Residents and the band Van der Graaf Generator and other good music (Not that important I guess…), not anti-gaming (Too illogical to be anti-gaming, and what about board games…), Clothing doesnt really matter maybe wear skirts or dresses sometimes (Not that important), not into banging random people that arent even that cool, age 18-35 (I think some 30 year olds dont look that old. Eh..), cute and sexy at same time (Sorry if this one is too difficult. I guess not that important.), expressive face but no making annoying facial expressions that look dumb and phony, cool hairstyle (Maybe change it sometimes) Eh… Is this list too stupid… Well… Eh I think its not even worth it to get a girlfriend. Imaginationland is better. You know why aliens dont talk to humans. Its because they are in Imaginationland all day long with HIGH-TECH DEVICES…At least a decent amount of them are. Well thats theoretical. Honestly screw this world. Imagination is better than real life. And dont accuse me of bringing you in a Frownland. Its everybody else who put me in a Frownland. Yeah it seems like theres no reason in getting a girlfriend when my imagination is so creative. Plus doing it raw seems to be dangerous. It really doesnt matter if something is real or not. Do we need to be fighting in real life instead of playing a fighting game. Alright fine, I could get blown and doing it with a condom wouldnt be that bad probs. Welp.. Who really cares though. The real problem is that I couldnt find someone good enough. I have a Phony Detector in my brain and it just goes off all the time. And yes, I do like the book The Catcher in the Rye. I dont read that much. But that book is cool and has an interesting protagonist and he hates phonies and hates the adult world. Yeah adults are always insulting kids these days and its not cool. Who is to say the kid isnt smarter than them. Theyd be an anti intellectual if they refuse to hear the opinions of a kid who is a genius. Welp.. I’ll admit it. I came up with the best character to imagine myself banging. Because theres good dialogue, I came up with a good personality for this character and she says cool stuff. You jackers probably have horrible dialogue in your head coming from the girls mouth when you jack it. Pfft, Im not sharing my advice anyway. Maybe we’ll put a character like this in Mortis The Vanquisher. Eh and don’t think this is too weird. Its only weird to imagine an elaborate character youre banging if theyre a very regular person. Cause whats the point anyway. Seriously these people talking about imaginary girlfriends on Reddit. Pretty boring fake characters these people make… Seriously dood… Whats their problem. Alright so what is a phony anyway. Welp… I guess you could call me a phony. Im pretty much going around here saying bizarre stuff to be funny. Its more fun to say bizarre stuff than tell regular jokes. I never really liked stand up comedy. Well… Hopefully this sincerity will get me a girlfriend. Come to think of it, a girl doesnt need to have everything from the list I made earlier. Eh.. You know I think I just want to bang a girl who is cool and not necessarily want to be in a relationship. Welp… Too degenerate… But I couldnt bang some soulless person. I cant believe people jack it to p videos. All the people in those videos are soulless. Even homemade ones, and most Japanese videos (The videos still suck, but some girls in them dont look soulless. And I know what youre thinking, how can you tell, and also seems like racist Japanese supremacy. Welp… Im not saying theyre the best people and Im not saying that I would love to know them. Im just saying they look like they have souls. People in Western p videos look much more sinister.). Such idiots… They are wasting their life thinking theyre normal. They go around saying “Having a normal one huh” to any guy who is trying to say some interesting stuff. Im tired of all these damn idiots talking about self improvement too. They didnt improve their damn personality except they think theyre stoic. Just an idiotic bunch of people who used to jack it to crappy videos and got addicted to it and now they read exclusively books on self improvement which isnt the type of book that would improve you most. Welp… Romantic relationships seem kinda unideal because youre gonna have to buy a gift every important day. Damn it, how am I supposed to do this. I am a problem solver but this is a damn horrible problem. My cousin apparently got broken up because he didnt buy a gift. I never saw what his girlfriend looked like, my mom wanted to show me a photo of her but I closed my eyes because I was afraid and had no idea what to expect. Well I’ll never know. It would be too weird to be curious about it. Doesnt really matter though. Damn it, I couldnt even come up what I would give as a gift for this fictional character I came up with last night. Well she wouldnt care if I didnt buy her a gift because she doesnt care I dont have a job. Well dont get the wrong idea, I didnt imagine a conversation about my occupation during yesterdays beating session nor as the prelude. And dont get the wrong idea with the word beating. Its just a word to be funny, ok?! And Im on a gap year anyway, Im gonna get busy eventually… I dont know seems like a lot of problems with being in a romantic relationship. You’ll have to meet their family. There could be problems with them. Eh, I guess Im not gonna bother with this crap. Well fine… Maybe I could get along with old people. I like the YouTube channel Sea of Tranquility and its show In The Prog Seat. Welp… Theyre probably not fans of prog at your girlfriends house. And eh, Im too DAMN WIERD!!! Damn it… People dont want to be with me because Im not mature. Damn it… A moderator said I was mature when I was trying hard to become a moderator in a Discord server at age 11. I just wanted the power… The power and the glory should’ve been mine for the taking… So pfft. You think Im not mature, well just look at all those adults on the internet who tink theyre funny. Damn it… Im more mature than all these unwise people…. Im an agekin… Im an old man in a young persons body.. So come on… Im mature. And to you Scaruffians who say Im not mature because I gave one The Beatles and The Smiths album the highest rating on albumoftheyear (Which I only use cause Im banned from Rateyourmusic for defending an album from people who were saying more immature jokes, femboy jokes to be specific. And I know what youre thinking, there could be a good femboy joke. Well its not the fact that the joke was about femboys that made it bad, it just lacked substance because all they were saying was that Jon Anderson sounds like a femboy. Not funny. I guess it is funny to a degree because Jon Anderson had an ego flying apparently because someone said Yes is gonna put the Bible to an album with Tales from Topographic Oceans and he said damn right we will. But the joker didnt know that… So a “femboy” with an ego seems funny... Damn fate made this joke have substance on accident…) Damn it… I have more mature albums in the highest rating. And those two albums are in the lower tier of the highest score… And I know what youre thinking, come on it doesnt matter what albums you listen to, that has nothing to do with maturity. Well Im just defending myself from the hypothetical Scaruffians… Im a semi Scaruffian anyway… People hate young people because most of them arent cool enough… But what about the ones who are cool enough… Come on, Im the king of comedy… And dont think Im some man with an ego flying… Some guy even said “yes” when I asked him if I was the king of comedy for accusing a picture of an “conventionally attractive woman” of looking like they are “annoying and anti-gaming…” Come on, aint that hilaribum. And I know what youre thinking, a mature person isnt just saying dumb remarks on the internet… Oh and these Redditors who say boring posts are any more mature than me… I think NOT!!! And I know you will say that is an immature phrase. Well Im taking the piss here. Im a cool person and sometimes I wear a jacket that is kinda a leather jacket. But yeah I know you will say Im not the king of comedy even if one person said I was, because he didnt even come to the conclusion himself and he might’ve just been insincere with his answer. And one persons opinion isnt that valuable unless they are a genius. Plus this guy just argues politics all the time on his account, doesnt seem like the most genius opinion worth caring about right?! Well Im sure you people would consider him more mature than me… Yeah talking about politics makes you seem mature right. Doesnt it… It sure DOESNT! And I know what youre thinking, this guy is too emotional. Come on.. I dont really care that much about being called mature or not. Why would these random peoples opinions matter anyhoo. Eh I think I could attract some female people aged up to 26. Woooo. But I know what youre thinking if youre a Republican, they probably have a high body count. Welp… I think thats exaggerated because none of my female extended family members seem to be doing that stuff. Fine I wouldnt know. BUT ARENT I COOL AS HECK… Hopefully some philosopher reads this website and analyzes the multi-dimensional layered substance of my speech and personality… And puts the analysis on YouTube. Woooooo. And I know what you’re thinking, why are you cheering over some made-up scenario… Argh… Ive had it with you feisty ones… And dont think Im coming on to you with that statement… Argh… Alright… Well I didnt even date the last few paragraphs. Well its November 4 2025 1:06 PM. The paragraphs before it are from the beginning of November as well. Peace. Why do people even make a big deal about height… I was never concerned about my height… But was concerned with my wein size since age 5… Good thing its bigger than 80% of Western male people. And no I didnt use pumps… Im 5’7 I think, I dont even remember if I gained an inch last doctors visit. Who really cares. Never even heard a person complain about their height until I was 13… Damn modernity affected everybody.. Even Missus Wooten well as little Nitty.. And female people… Come on care more about wiener size instead of height like a normal person… And I must clarify.. Im JOAKING WITH THAT STATEMENT!!! And anyway… Just ignore all these people… Its not like you’d want to bang them anyway… And Im sorry for writing that list of preferences I have if you like me… Welp… But probably Im not even that well liked because GENIUSES ARE LAUGHED AT!!!! And thats just a joak statement again. So dont take it serious. Argh… This paragraph isnt as interesting as other ones Ive written. So dont think I lost my brain. Its just not that interesting of a topic… Why do people think people who have high standards are pornography addicts… I hate pornography because they all look unattractive. Ive seen a bald female person who looks better than any person in those p videos. Welp… Lets just say that so many humans are misguided. And eh… Its not like I imagine a lady having a less attractive buttocks in my head because its more realistic… But I wouldnt care that much about buttocks or breasts… Just seems kinda dumb to jack it to someone who doesnt have a good face. Yeah I looked a p video now for reference. Didnt get an erection. And it wasnt the worst video… But theres no damn point in watching it. The lady seems soulless.. Yep Im not getting an erection to any of these videos. Its official.. Im too smart for this crap. Woooo. Alright come to think of it, I hate the nickname Rudy. So dont call me Plootonius "Rudy" Brown... And I know girls dont want to say Rudy wen where banging! Oh crap I cant spell words right. Well I can but I spelt them wrong there. Im not fixing it. See my folly. You can call me Plootonius. But I have a Welsh first name in real life... And you know what girls, we dont have to have that much in common as long as youre cool... Hopefully people find me cool. And dont think I just want to bang. I do want to though. You know I used to be an antisexual. Hell I even wrote a story about a guy who hated sex. It takes place in the world of Banjo Kazooie. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1LghF7B9zP5ZB4KcsAkiN4WUvH6DJIq2zVKdI4Wj2SZY/edit?usp=sharing Read it here... Its a huge story that I never finished. But many of my opinions have changed since then. Alright, its too offensive of a story. Yeah I was being a contrarian with my political opinions that nobody has in that story. Saying its good to have immigrants that people hate because it doesnt affect gamers who stay inside, and I mocked many of my teachers in that story. Welp... Its an interesting story but I changed my opinions from it. But it has many funny moments and subtle jokes and the people talk weird. The main protagonist is not really a hero. And neither is anybody he meets really. Hes just better than most of those people. But I recommend reading it with an open mind and see many funny moments and the most contrarian political opinions ever. Well I hope it stands out as a good piece of outsider art. And dont get the wrong idea that the main character says he is MGTOW in the beginning of the story... I rarely edit my stories and just keep them having dumb stuff in it. Peace.

Alright… Ive reread some of my stuff on this website. Some of it sounds very cool but too much complaining about benign stuff. I should be more positive, and accept probably nobody is like me. And anyway lets give some commentary on Banjo Gagooie. Well the mansion part (Which is at the end and doesnt have much parts), thats based on Umineko. I know some girls like Umineko.. So boom. Welp… Theres too many racial jokes in Banjo Gagooie… But theres no oversaid stereotypes in there. Racial jokes arent that funny, but its the absurd moments of the story that really make it funny like how the main protagonist got angry when his Indian teacher was acting too American because he likes Indian culture. And also Im sorry for too many female characters that are enemy characters. And also I admit, many of the characters, including main characters arent well written in this story. Theres really not much difference between Mumbo Jumbo and G-Banjo after G-Banjo gets over his edginess. The story is too edgy. And you know what I say about edginess, edginess is phoniness (For the most part.) Too much inappropriate stuff. And yeah the fact that Mr. Babu wouldnt mind if he had wieners on the palm of his hands and the fact he might even suck those probably makes him not that likable of a character, but I didnt want him to be some perfect mentor character. You know I had a game development class teacher. And well, he was weird. He bragged about having a supposedly sexy wife… Too inappropriate… And he was left wing and acted too friendly which people complained about when the Google Form which was an exam had positive messages encouraging you if you hovered over images in the Google Form. Welp… I didnt really care about that. But I hate school. They cant do anything right. Always trying to make things fun with assignments that treat you like some idiot who thinks theyre cool. Having to make a phone home screen for a character in a book. Why… This is not fun and has little educational value. God damn anus wipes they are… Sarcastic arses… Smug… They think Im an idiot… Showing a scripted video of racism to teach us about racism.. “Theyre talking about you.” Damn it, and you had to write how the video made you feel. So you have to say uncomfortable. Welp.. Boring. That was in 8th grade… And well.. School is horrible, so many uncool people there. But Banjo Gagooie… It has funny moments… But its probably too offensive and edgy… At least its contrarian edginess… But I wanted to show that story because it is pretty absurd. I dont want this to be my Loco Bandito… Yeah I watch Mike Matei sometimes… I probably wouldnt recommend his channel. I like Matthewmatosis and his streams on his Matthewmatosis Extra channel.. Because he likes many cool games. Mike Matei also likes some cool games but probably isnt a great thinker of video games and he just tries them out for a stream or two and never plays them again. The Electric Underground is a pretty good game reviewing channel made by a guy named Mark and I also like his streams in his playlist called “Livestream With Mic,” those can be good because he answers questions and talks about game design often with his friend Boghog who is a game developer and he is even cooler than Mark and some say he is the brains of the Electric Underground and Mark is heavily influenced by him. Yeah its fun to watch those streams because Mark of The Electric Underground is pretty weird and you know he gets hated on by many hardcore gamers who think his videos arent that good because he keeps on making up terms like “Mechanical Brutalism” or “Mechanical Darwinism” and he insults Rubiks cubes saying they have no depth (Obviously there is skill involved with Rubiks cubes…), and Im sure theres other complaints people have about him. Well Boghog and him seem to be best friends though. But eh, there are no heroes in this world really. Matthewmatosis is probably the coolest of the game review youtubers, one reason is because he is more open minded with games though he is not some guy who likes everything, also his videos are well edited and don’t have dumb special effects, also he is pretty charming and says some weird stuff, he once tried to eat cereal off his head to see if he could do it like he saw in an episode of Futurama. Electric Underground just focuses on action games. Ive been watching the channel Sea of Tranquility which is a rock music discussion channel, its pretty good but probably has much more niche appeal because they are some old people. The videos I watch of that channel are ones where they talk about some theme, such as prog albums they cant stand, worst album covers (They showed an Echolyn album cover that looks so sinister.. A girl with white ice cream on her face which the funny guy says looks like other things.), and theres others, mostly watch the videos which have a panel and not just one person which is usually the host. But eh, I dont necessarily recommend that channel. I talked about how watching a classical composer reacting to progressive rock is more interesting than a girl reacting to your wiener. And thats true, because the classical composer has more interesting comments. The progressive rock was handcrafted by a skilled person who used creativity. Well I watch that channel sometimes of Doug Helvering. But eh, he claimed to have found out that the syllables in Tool’s Lateratus is the Fibonacci sequence by himself. Seems unlikely he would figure that out. Though that was an early video. I think he is more honest now. Well I watch that sometimes… OneyPlays, theyre ok and can be interesting. Northernlion, can be interesting. Joseph Anderson is not the coolest but is interesting. I vandalized his Wikitubia page and it still has so many fake quotes. Go laugh at them, and if they have been changed, well look at the history for some obviously fake quotes. In fact a vandalism of this page got featured in a video essay as a factual statement, “The Lost Art of Video Game Critique” by Gred Glintstone, he says that Joseph Anderson called himself Matthewmatosis’s little brother. Thats a fake quote I put on the page. Heh. Nobody noticed. People really believed that he would say that and didnt question it, even his fans didnt question it. Thats hilaribum. Some other pages vandalized are TheGamerFromMars with some fake quotes, Egoraptor with some fake quotes. I bet you won’t even be able to tell which are real and which aren’t for Egoraptor, heh and there’s so many fake quotes there. So yeah I hope you find them as hilarious as me. Its Wikitubia. And man, its hilarious putting so many fake quotes. I even put a fake quote on some random drummer who is apparently inspired by the drummer from Blink-182 and the drummer from Porcupine Tree (I thought I wrote that as a fake trivia and I laughed so hard at it.. How are you inspired by both of those people…) saying “I beat my girl… In Smash Bros…” (Just imagine some person thinking you’d make that joke…) and saying “What if they made Rick and Morty Porcupine Tree?” (Too funny… I said that in the Porcupine Tree discord and some guy was saying Im unfunny. Damn it the point of the joke was to be a bad joke. Its my style of anti-comedy…) Oh man, this is just hilarious. So I hope you people find it funny. I even vandalized Mike Matei’s page saying that he tried to climb the Wall of China but was stopped by a guard. But he has a fan who always fixes the page. And he thought that I vandalized the page when I edited it to say that Mike Matei played a role as a Klingon in the Angry Video Game Nerd (I like the old episodes of that), guess he doesn’t know what a Klingon is because he thought it was fake information… And yeah I put some fake information and some real information in the same edit. It’s being a good person and also being some punk at the same time… I even edited George Harrison’s page. "Ravi Shankar has taught me well. The sitar is my weapon, and the Hindu haters are my target! If you say you stop listening to my song 'My Sweet Lord' halfway because I start saying 'Hare Krishna,' then you are not psychedelic enough for me. We Beatles are leaders of the psychedelic movement, and if you think your Christianity is psychedelic, then you are a fool!” And “Ringo gonna go Ringoo all over his wife. That's a bunch of spleef!" Man these edits are some of the funniest things I ever did. And heres a fake quote from a Town of Salem video maker named PipeTron. "I bet this guy doesn't even know the name of the man who invented the seed drill." (When a player says that they like Morty more than Rick in Rick and Morty in chat) Yeah the parentheses are in the article if youre confused. Man thats hilarious. "This is looking good! I need to smooch my computer screen eight times!" (When the match has five escort skins and two consort skins and one witch) "He probably is going to die while recording pooping sound effects for his first album." (When a guy talks about poop a lot in chat) "The movie Kill Bill is dumb because it is just having a rhyming name for no reason. It would be a suitable name for a rap song, but not for a film." Thats more PipeTron stuff. Heres some funny fake quotes from Egoraptors page. "Hey you little sissy hypno cuck, wanna make a quick buck of a fuck?" "I jacked off to Harley Quinn over 300 times. Am I a crazy bastard or wut?!?" "Hideo Kojima is actually a very good looking guy back in the PS1 and PS2 days and earlier when he made the Metal Gear for that Japanese console. Kudos to Hideo Kojima. Kojima kind of looks like he'd be a communist leader like Mao Zedong or Ho Chi Minh or Joseph Stalin or Victor Lenin. Japan needs one of those. Am I right Dan? WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO?! FUCK YOU DANNY GOY. Who the fuck is Kenji Miyamoto?" Yeah I searched up communist Japanese people and pretended they were having a conversation about communist figures in a video. And honestly Hideo Kojima does look really cool during that era. "This d*ck is for whores only." Sounds like something he’d say right… "You look at someone, you instantly judge them by how they look. A lot of girls think I'm mean and when they talk to me, I'm nice. They think I look mean because I walk with a scowl. I don't walk with a scowl actually, I'm nice. I'm a bigger guy, that's why girls think I'm mean. I walk around with my hood on, they think I'm closed off because I have my hood on. I'm not guilty of it too, I don't judge people. I don't think some people might be rich and some might be poor. I don't wear khakis so I look presentable and would be a good employee based on how I look." This is me copying a conversation (with some words changed) that was happening in real life in school. I was vandalizing the page in school! This was what some kid was saying in Special Ed English class. And yeah I was put in Special Ed in my last year of high school, dont think Im some idiot though. I barely ever talked in high school so they put me there. It was such an easy school year. What a waste of time... "I ain't apologizin' no shizzle for party rockin' my ass off with the video game Yu-Gi-Oh! Forbidden Memories. This game is practically a casino simulator if you don't know the rules and just choose a random card. Fuck the hos who say gambling is a bad game mechanic. It's fun." What a dumb statement… https://youtube.fandom.com/wiki/EmpLemon Go here and look at the history of the page by pressing the three dots at the top right of the article. I tried to pretend that he had a feud with Anthony Fantano because he gave a female rapper who sticks her tongue out a high rating for an album. And this YouTuber EmpLemon is a fan of progressive rock so it is a very believable story that he would get angry at Anthony Fantano. And this guy EmpLemon really did praise Anthony Fantano back in the day as some great memer. Anyway I might have said some anti-meme sentiment on this website… Well dont take it too seriously if you like memes… Theyre not that bad and I do laugh at some but its not that hard of a laugh as these multi-dimensional layered Wikitubia vandalisms. Some guy even added extra information to the fake feud. The Beach Boys page has quotes "Junior boy you ignorant anus." "Crappers and cheese, I said CRAPPERS AND CHEESE! Why...." These are taken from the Mario Kart review of an Angry Video Game Nerd clone named Game Dude. But I guess people who saw this page think this is something the Beach Boys said behind the scenes, a Beach Boys fan edited the page and only corrected some quote’s spelling. I wrote surfari instead of safari. Come on, I thought they were saying surfari as a play on words. And yeah I did write some real lyrics to their music in the quotes section to make the edit look more legit. Check out this Clash of Clans youtuber vandalism. Look at the page of MasterOv Gaming because the smug face he has in the infobox and imagining him saying these words, well its just hilarious. "I am Master Ov." "Poop salad.. Yummy yummy.." "I am gonna poop in your thyroid. HAHAHAHAHA!" "What do you call a cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese." "I did nazi that one coming, not gonna lie, but did Jew see that one coming? I think not bro." "Add some Master Ov to your day, if you don't watch my videos everyday then you're a fail, not gonna lie bro." This is the silliest collection of quotes ever. That nacho cheese joke, I said that when it was my time to do the morning announcements in elementary school. Check out this trivia for a youtuber named DeadwingDork who talks about lolcows. “He wants ATLUS to make a Persona MMORPG with eagles that you can fly on that take you to parts of Japan. He wants the game to involve a non-turn based combat. The combat will be like the game Chef's Luv Shack for Nintendo 64. The game involves dueling NPCs and also dueling other players in the Wilderness. You can meet famous Japanese people in the game. You can date a crazy girl named Pearalina who is a serial killer but that is a plot twist that is told to you at the end of the love questline. The love quests involve doing fetch quests to earn her love. When you finish the questline, you will have to duel her for the fact she is a serial killer. There are other NPCs you can date including Sheriff Johnson, an American refugee because of the Iraq War being lost by America in the game's timeline. Sheriff Johnson's plot twist is that they are a hermaphrodite. They are hard to tell what gender they are because they have long hair and a face that doesn't look masculine nor feminine. The game will be free.” What a horrible and specific idea. Now check out this trivia of Anthony Fantano. The fact that he refers to himself as the internet's busiest music nerd is often criticized by haters as being a title impossible to calculate and some people refuse to watch his reviews as they think this self-referred title is arrogant and pretentious. Anthony Fantano had hair in early 2000s but since then shaved it. It is controversial that Anthony Fantano charges his fans money to ask him questions on his opinions on music during livestreams. Anthony Fantano thinks that greed is the worst of the seven deadly sins. Although, he hates Christianity because it is a religion that needs defending. However, he is still a fan of the concept of the seven deadly sins. Famous critic Robert Christgau and proponent of musical movements such as hip hop and riot grrrl says he doesn't watch Anthony Fantano's reviews because he doesn't want to watch a video of a guy talking to a camera when he'd rather read text. Anthony Fantano thinks WAP is the second best song of 2020.[30] Anthony Fantano says that classical music is the only type of music that he cannot get into. Anthony Fantano complimented the vocals of the song "Rick Men North Of Richmond," and called the vocals "good." Anthony Fantano had a classmate named Imanol who made fun of him for his eccentric behavior. Anthony Fantano said he hates the video game "Space Station 13" for being too complicated. The game is known for being the closest video game experience to a tabletop role-playing game as far as multiplayer roleplaying goes. Anthony Fantano watches "Groundhog Day" on Groundhog Day. Anthony Fantano criticized the show Family Ties for having a "lackluster theme song." He also hates the character Alex Keaton, who he calls "Marty" because he is played by the same actor who plays young character "Marty McFly" in the film "Back to the Future." He hates the character Alex Keaton for being conservative despite having hippie parents. Anthony Fantano used to be able to recite all the lyrics to "El Scorcho" by Weezer but is no longer able to, due to a lack of practicing. Anthony Fantano can play the bass guitar. Anthony hates Super Monkey Ball 1's expert stages, even going as far to call them unfun. Fans wonder what he would think about the master stages. Anthony Fantano fell asleep while listening to Beethoven's ninth symphony for the first time. Luckily, this was not on stream. Anthony hates the band Egg because their song "While Growing My Hair" has weird lyrics that he thinks are "edgy tryhard bullshit". Anthony Fantano's least favorite game is "Ghosts N' Goblins Resurrection" because he says dressed up as Cal Chuchesta, "This game's jumping physics is like a bunch of cockadookie but blended with ridgy rice that was rolled in Tuscany" and he criticized the RNG of the game saying "The RNG is so unfair. The RNG makes me want to shrivel up like a pinecone that was stomped on by a little kid but I am not gonna die from that. I am just gonna get hurt so bad by that. It is gonna make me feel like an earthquake is directly on my bones." Game reviewer Matthewmatosis criticized Anthony Fantano for his statements, saying "This sounds like an Edgar Allan Foe/wannabe AVGN making fun of the greatest action platformer ever because it is too hard for him. But even AVGN says that Ghosts N' Goblins isn't a bad game, and he was saying that about the NES version which is inferior to the arcade version of that game!" Anthony says that the song "Louie Louie" by the Kingsrows is better than the parody "Plastic People" by The Mothers of Invention. Anthony says he knows more music theory than Sam Hyde so he wins the feud that they have. Pretty funny. Seriously just imagine Matthewmatosis flaming Anthony Fantano for gaming opinions. I dont think Matthewmatosis really likes AVGN and he never talks about them. Makes sense because hes not a real reviewer but is trying to be funny. And Anthony Fantano calling Egg’s song While Growing My Hair edgy tryhard bullshit, that makes no sense because its a silly song. Check out the vandalisms for a mobile game Supercell YouTuber named MOLT. "I'm a MAGIC MAMA FROM THE BAHAMAS." "He is such a goo monkey." "Goo off." "My barbarian king sucks." "Drink some G FUEL." "Oh mama jamma baba laba waba. Oooh yeah. Let's keep rollin baby you know what time it is." If you look at his face, just imagine a guy like that saying this shit. And since this is the quotes section, it implies that he says “He is such a goo monkey,” all the time. He says “Goo off” instead of “Fuck off.” This guy keeps talking about goo… And Jerma was caught fixing his hair with his spit on a March 2021 stream. At least thats what his Wikitubia page says. Alright thats pretty much all the funny stuff. Oh yeah I didnt copy the Joseph Anderson quotes. "I'm going to be honest with you. I was pulling your leg when I said that the Mushroom Kingdom was a tutorial level. It is actually unlocked after you beat the game. So why is it so easy?" "I got a batshit theory that Miyamoto was murdered and replaced. Miyamoto liked hard games. So why is Super Mario Odyssey so easy?!" "Super Mario Odyssey is artificial difficulty 100. Yeah that's a Skyrim reference. Oh I guess it's also a Morrowind reference or a Daggerfall reference. But really, most people played Skyrim only. Don't get me started about the 20 year olds who say that they are waiting for Skyrim 2. It's not gonna be called Skyrim 2. It's gonna be called Valenwood or Black Marsh or something." "Why does Super Mario Odyssey make me do jump ropes? I never played with jump ropes on the playground, it was usually girls who did that. Same goes with hula hoops." "Matthewmatosis's video on Context Sensitivity was a work of genius. I think my best videos are a 9/10, that was a 10/10." "Forager is a game about greasy cocks eating challenge minigame." "Hello and welcome to Rainforest Books and my rainforest book review. Today we will be looking at Birds in the Rainforest. This book really is sexy. Not because of the birds, but because of the prose. It doesn't make me gassy, it makes me nasty! The person who wrote this really captured the atmosphere of the rainforest and all that good stuff. This is a full-on mighty master boss of a book. Jungle books can't compete with rainforest books." "Nice quality of life crafting, Resident Evil 4 remake. Though they screwed up the game's movement in this remake. Too easy, do you think I am a baby named Fred?" "Canadian nights, Canadian frights. OH. What a night. Canadian blights, canadian sights. OH. What a light. There is the light of the night. Or is it? Or is it? Oh oh Canadian lights! There is none. No no no. Oh oh oh. No oh no oh no. Oh oh oh oh oh. Oh oh oh oh oh. Canadough in my ho. Ho ho. No no no. Canadough cookie dough. Oh. Woah woah woah. I need to make a cookie with my Canadough. Oh. Oh oh oh. On this Canadian night, with my might, I saw the sight of a cookie made with Canadough. A cookie made with Canadough. A cookie made with..... CANADOUGH..........." "STEP AND GO!" "The youth of Canada is filled with fake gamers. Blame the parents for not telling them about the best games like unshattered masterpieces, and don't make them play games that are no masterpieces." "Super Mario Odyssey should have precision platforming. They need to make a controller with four joysticks for the next Nintendo console so they can expand the possibilities of gameplay. Obviously you aren't going to be using all four joysticks at once, But you will be using them for different purposes allowing for more possibilities with the controls." "I know you like to bake. I know a lot." "For goodness sake, drink some sake." "Forlorn whispers in the night, a darkness of that which is not right. Where are they sleeping? And how are they creeping?" "It's like having Chris Pratt as the model of your Pocket Pussy. It's not really what you want, because he doesn't really have a pussy and it's just based on nothing." "Yoshi's Island has a wide moveset and Jesusly level design. That's why it's the best Mario game for me." "I am Matthewmatosis.....'s little brother!" "Diarrhea of a Pimply Bid, is say it with me, not true literature. I'm talking about Diary of a Wimpy Kid for you stragglers who couldn't tell what I was talking about when I mocked the title of this Kinney Non-Kino. I like true literature like Gravity's Rainbow and Anna Karenina. But visual novels are even better than literature. They really are a delight for the senses.""The Zackbots from Wild Kratts are badass. I shouldn't have made my profile picture a dragon. I should have done something related to Wild Kratts. Wild Kratts would never put dragons in their show because they don't like fantasy and they like real animals. Just kidding kids. Wild Kratts is literally a racist show. I'm not a fan. They'd rather transform into animals from Africa instead of humans from Africa. Fuck that. Just kidding kids. Wild Kratts is kind of boring of a show. It's ok for kids. But for men, we should watch shows like Frasier and watch Frasier kiss a hooker who is a 6/10 and he acts like kissing a 6/10 hooker is the most logical thing he should do in life. Frasier's ex-wives kind of lost their looks unfortunately. So I guess that is good for Frasier. But don't go kissing a 6/10 hooker. I guess the fact that Frasier kissed a 6/10 hooker kind of embarrassed me to being a Frasier fan. I haven't watched it or any TV show in a few months." "Anna Karenina probably has poorly shapen boobies. Fuck that. Why even read the book if that is true. Leroy Tolstoy has no respect for his readers if he is gonna make an old hag a protagonist. This is why gaming is better. You get to play as a cooler Russian in Street Fighter II called Zangief. Funny how the Japanese make more appealing Russian characters than Russia." "Videogamedunkey needs to roll a sai like a die. So when he rolls the sai, we shall see if it strikes him. Or will God protect him? The laws of physics were created entirely for this sai rolling event. He will not die from the sai anyway." "I never should have said that about Videogamedunkey." "I hate it when the Japanese writers put perverted jokes in their works. It really TICKS ME OFF. UUUUUUUGH!!!!!!" "I bet so many women who dream of marriage bought Elden Ring thinking they were gonna get married to an elf in the game. But it's Elden, not Elven. And it's not that kind of ring. They probably thought the man on the front cover was in love with them." "I am criticizing the game Billy Hatcher and the Giant Egg for lying about the egg's size. The egg is not giant. I thought in this game that we were going to go inside of a giant egg and go on an adventure inside of an egg. But no, this egg is not giant, it's big, yes, but not giant. I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE LIKE GOING INSIDE OF THE TREE IN OCARINA OF TIME! A dungeon of eggy yolks as springs and all that good stuff. But no, you just roll the big egg, we won't be calling it a giant egg because it's not giant. Liars." "Fallout 4 has a glaring problem. The characters have no Russian accents despite the fact that the Russian invasion obviously happened in the Fallout canon. This game ignores the lore of Fallout 1 where they talked about Russian Invaders that you fought against in a combat section that was like Space Invaders. That was a legendary moment of an RPG incorporating arcade game design." "Halo 3 is a game that I think is very flawed. Master Chief is getting mind controlled by Cortana in this game in the lore. But is he going to be a sissy hypno? This is just perverted and probably is the plot of many rule 34 Halo stuff. This is messed up. And the gameplay, well let's just say that there are no moments where Cortana just mind controls you and makes you unable to control the game, and then she puts you into a bad situation. That would be a genius showcase of the mind control at its worst." Alright peace out and enjoy laughing at these Wiki vandalisms that many people read and believed were real. I guess you can go around and tell on me. But Im done being silent on these vandalisms I done months or even years ago. Its time people knew about some of my funniest stuff. Welp if you think Im a funny person, send me a friend request at vandergraafgenerator on Discord.

What is the meaning of GonnoPatriot? It doesnt really mean anything. Gonno is short for gonorrhea."

Damn it… Im too wierd. Well are my Wikitubia vandalisms hilarious. I laughed so hard last night looking at them. But damn it, seems like many people dont have such a sense of humor like mine… Welp… Am I a bad person for doing this… I think its funny. Sorry for not being the most moral.. Im not a hero… Nobody is anyway… Its a farce… All we do is mock people all day long… Social media is a mocking game… Its an egregious opinion scavenger hunt… Its tiresome… Im fed up with supposed normal people… Theyre all so sinister… Their jokes are not multi-dimensional layered… And if they are, its only two dimensions… Im tired of people acting like theyre normal… Plootonius Brown is not impressed with these people… Damn annoying adults… No wonder why people are depressed… Nobody is original with their jokes.. My joke where I claimed that PipeTron, a Town of Salem YouTuber said “I bet this guy doesn’t even know who invented the seed drill,” when he saw in the game’s chat that someone said they like Morty more than Rick from Rick and Morty, well its very multidimensional layered joke. Its pretty absurd to act so elite because you know who invented an old invention for farmers and he probably chose that as the knowledge test because he knows its not common knowledge. And he says that just because he likes Rick more than Morty. And he probably only knows who invented the seed drill just because the band Jethro Tull is named after the inventor. Not many Town of Salem players would know about the band Jethro Tull that much. And this sounds like something a Rick and Morty fan who loves Rick would say. And its funny to imagine people are talking about their favorite Rick and Morty characters in the middle of a game of Town of Salem. And you would imagine that he highlighted the text of the person who said they liked Morty more than Rick so the viewer of the YouTube video knows what message in chat he is responding to. So he would have to do an elaborate gesture that is unnatural and also can be easily missed if someone isnt paying attention so they might not know what hes responding to and have to rewind the video. Its funny to imagine the guy PipeTron being an elitist prick, because he does clickbait, saying he has done some plays that are “300 IQ” in the title of his videos which makes it even more likely that someone reading this fake quote would believe that he is actually a smug Rick and Morty fan who brags about knowing who invented the seed drill. This is a Wikitubia vandalism of a page that shows up high if you search his username on Google. This implies many people wanting to learn more about him saw this quote and was shellshocked. Also the fact that social deduction games are considered by many people to be flawed as they are unbalanced, so someone might think that this guy is being elitist when he isnt even playing the most perfect game and they would potentially go complain about false elitism. Lets also imagine some Town of Salem player who hates PipeTron for being the most popular YouTuber of the game saw this fake quote and thought it was real and hated him even more. Plus the word seed drill is a silly sounding word. Lets not forget that the word seed has sexual connotations. The word drill also does. Plus the phrasing “doesn’t even know” is very mocking. Plus there is no correlation between Rick and Morty and seed drills so it seems nonsensical to even start talking about seed drills as a response to that. Plus it is just funny to put bizarre misinformation on a Wiki page. All in all, this joke is so multi-dimensional layered in its absurdity which caused me to laugh at it for a long time. My opinion on the game Town of Salem is that you just play it for the funny moments of writing idiotic death notes (And you can give hints in the death note that are either fake or real if you want), and when youre evil you can pretend to be a Medium which is a role where you can see the dead peoples chat and you can make them sound like idiots when its day time and you tell the living town what the dead supposedly said. Most people probsbly dont have as much fun with the game as I did. You can also just say dumb stuff in chat all the time and pretend to have some persona (Like being a Rick and Morty fan). And theres fun roles like Jester and Executioner where you have to get hung or get someone else hung. It is time for another joke analysis. “He is such a goo monkey.” is a fake quote supposedly said by a Supercell game YouTuber named MOLT which can be found on his Wikitubia page unless someone corrects it, if so then check the history of the page. The phrase “He is such a goo monkey” has probably not been said by anybody. Let’s not forget that he says “such a” which sounds like a playful flamboyant flirt. Knowing the context of the YouTuber and what games he plays, it can be assumed that he said this in the middle of a Clash Royale 1v1. Let’s not forget that this is a family friendly YouTuber who is having a tough time getting views these days though if this is a quote on his page, it might be from a more famous video. And the phrase sounds sexual which doesn’t fit his persona. This guy has a big arm tattoo which doesn’t seem to correspond with the fact that he would say the phrase “He is such a goo monkey.” A goo monkey is not a well established concept in any type of fiction. It is vague what a goo monkey even is. It can be assumed that he is frustrated at Clash Royale which makes him say this. Or it can be assumed that he is having a tough time saying something to keep the video entertaining. It is silly to assume such a person would start acting like a clown for a Clash Royale video, which seems to be an unlikely format for saying weird stuff. Sadly this Wikitubia vandalised page probably wasn’t seen by as many people as the PipeTron page because it doesn’t show up as high when you search “MOLT YouTube.” I can’t laugh at these jokes anymore because I’m too familiar with them for now. Maybe I will forget them and laugh again. But they did make me laugh a lot and I almost threw up from laughing so much this morning. I was in the bathroom praying that I didn’t have to throw up. God is on my side. Anyways it has come to my attention that saying that people look soulless is very offensive. Welp.. Im willing to be a hero. Because everyone loves a hero. I want to be a game developer. That’ll get me known as a hero and also seems like the most fun job. And yeah I know it will be hard work. Alright I know Im not a hero.. But I think my website is pretty interesting. Sorry for my moral problems. I sincerely mean that and not just saying that to “get poon”, Ive got a problem. Alright and physiognomy (When I said people looked soulless), probably isnt true though I thought it was because if you watch Sea of Tranquility “In The Prog Seat” on YouTube, their music taste really lines up with their face. I could tell what Ken’s ranking of the four albums of Pawn Hearts, Thick as a Brick, Hemispheres and Leftoverture was before he said it. Though fine, maybe that’s just because his ranking was the same as mine. Hmm… Damn this crap. Well I look handsome in a doorknob reflection. I used to think I looked horrible in the doorknob. I was putting my pants on the doorknob so I didnt have to look, well thats when I was pooping. Welp God has saved me. And I know what youre thinking, am I a religious person? Well I was trying to create my own religion with a text that would be the equivalent of a Bible or Quran. But welp, I wasnt that into it. I dont approve much of organized religion. It seems unlikely any of the religions are true. That doesnt mean theres no God. Welp people arent gonna want to bang in front of a doorknob but a regular mirror. And dont think I want to do that anyhoo. I am probably not misogynist and here is proof. The gamers I get pissed at for having bad opinions on gaming are all male. Just because I gave many female pop stars the lowest rating on Albumoftheyear, it is because I have to hear those songs on the radio. I dont even know the names of the annoying males on the radio which is why I didnt rate them low. Damn it, I HATE THAT CORPORATE BULLCRAP MUSIC… And the vocals have no soul.. I vandalized Wikitubia pages of only male YouTubers. DAMN MY LIFE!!! Alright I guess saying people in p videos look soulless seems like I am “anti-sex worker.” Damn it… I was just trying to tell you that I dont like those videos because theyre not arousing. Argh… I was also assuming that the videos posted on there were posted by people who just like to show themselves… Not that they were posting there to try and make money by advertising… Welp Im not an economist. Even though I have tried to come up with an economic system that is better than capitalism or communism. Its probably folly bololey idea to try and make one. Welp… I dont know… I know Im not a hero, BUT I HOPE THAT IM NOT DAMNED!!!! IM JUST A MAN AND KILLERS ANGELS, ALL OF THESE, DICTATORS, SAVIORS, REFUGEES IN WAR AND PEACE. Damn it… Im just trying to entertain with this website… Im pissed at so much of the internet… Too many uncool people… I hate this human business… So phony to me… Im pissed off at everyone… Except for some… And I guess I share too much dumb information here… Should I delete where I said my wiener size… I guess its a good idea to say it because of the stereotypes… Well thats a great perk for my race. You can say your wiener size for good reason. Wooooo. What other races have perks. Hmm… God is on my side, YES HE IS! Cool the show Smiling Friends is mentioning Super Monkey Ball. Yeah thats a good game. And to clarify about when I said I was in special ed for some classes in 12th grade, well it wasn’t really called special ed. But thats pretty much what it is. Though the people there werent that dumb. But they werent that cool except for one guy who liked classical music and was learning to play piano. Oh yeah and the guy who seemed to be cool but dont know much facts about. That guy liked sitting on the floor and got pissed without saying anything when the substitute teacher was telling him to sit at a table. A fact about this guy is he didnt seem to like the people who stood near him and were acting like they were people from the streets but theyre not. He sat on the other side of the class when they were there. I live in the Northeast of USA. School pissed me off because it was filled with phonies. Heh I was in a piano keyboard class and there was some kid who was a senior saying they thought the class was torture because they didnt like having to practice. And some kid was getting pissed off at the trap hip hop fans for using synths that he didnt like. And the trap hip hop fans showed the teacher a Harry Potter sampling trap song. He didnt like it. Eh I lost my skills in reading sheet music. Anyway what other school stories. Welp lets talk about the worst grade ever, 8th grade. Teachers dont seem to be that smart. Because on the last day I was waiting to get picked up and a teacher came and asked me if I called my parents to ask to pick me up. This guy should just realize that this is a planned situation and they already know to pick me up here. This guy isnt that logical. Eh thats just a funny story, not really a bad situation. I hated the teachers except for my Spanish teacher. The other ones were a sarcastic anus hole, a Disney adult who keeps pestering you to turn on your camera during Google Meet, the other two were too phony and keep making you work in a group. Damn it, I hate working in a group… Except for one guy who called me his best friend and gave me chicken balls during lunch. But I dont think he was sincere about me being his best friend. Well he gave me chicken balls before the pandemic happened, which was in 8th grade. It was 7th grade he gave me chicken balls during lunch. Now 6th grade, that was a good grade and there were funny people there at science class. Yeah working in a group was good in that class. I drew pictures of fat people and once I drew one with three heads and the tutor who had an African accent was thinking the drawing I drew was related to the science question of the day and he was asking me questions about it. Oh yeah and I threw a bunch of paper balls at once at the ginger kid who was my friend and I had to sit in the hallway. Well he was throwing some stuff at me too. But I guess what I did was too extreme. I hoped a cute girl would see me and be impressed. Well, I did impress girls by being funny in 2nd grade putting a dirty water bottle in my mouth. And it did work, I swear it. She was saying I was the funniest goy at the lunch table in 5th grade. And she said it twice and she said my name with a cute voice. So boom… There were some decent times. I wasnt interested in girls until I had a dream in 2nd grade that I got kissed on the cheek by two of them who were blonde. Welp… Im not interested in a harem anyway. Fine a harem requires 3 girls apparently. So it wouldnt be a harem if there were 2. Well you get the point, no need for this semantics. And anyways… Im pissed off at this WORLD…. The internet is just filled with people who arent saying anything cool. Its November 7 2025 12:29 AM. Im pissed and unsure if I can find a girl who I would be interested in on the internet. I seen the subreddit of ENTP personality which apparently is filled with people who like to troll people. Well I dont really see people trolling the way the people on the subreddit claim to troll. It is quite cool to see that other people like to confuse people too. But eh… Im just trying to be funny with my trolling. I started posting on X, I had accounts before but I didnt say much interesting stuff on it so I deactivated them. So I saw a guy make a big deal about normal people and what normal people think when they see a picture of a couple (Of the mayor of New York City and his wife). Welp he said that a normal person would think they look cute. Welp I dont really have that thought process really. I dont really think much of anything when I see a picture that is pretty regular. Welp this guy just thinks everyone is the same and makes a big deal out of being normal. Left wing and right wing, both of them make a big deal about being normal. What even is normal anyway. Are Klingons normal to them. I doubt most Klingons thought process at seeing a couple is saying they look cute. And welp this guy got 11 more likes than me with his generic response “Ok buddy.” Come on, people care too much about seeming normal instead of thinking about cool stuff, and also its a funny post I said, come on I realize its bizarre to say this crap. Its illogical to press the like button for such a boring response that they already forgot. I never press the like button. Well maybe I will change that. At least 1 guy liked my post. And he is a Palestine supporter. Woooooo. Maybe I made him laugh. Ive made people laugh with more benign CRUD. Like saying my foreskin looks makes my wiener look like a fish, oh yeah dont get turned off by that. Its only when its soft it looks like that a little bit. Stupid doctor said I shouldve been circumcised because I have extra skin. I dont respect many doctors. Well apparently that foreskin joke made some guy laugh really hard, I dont even think it was that funny. Also thinking about the story Banjo Gagooie, theres so much goddamn stuff in it that makes no sense. I dont even think its that good of a story. But its what I did back then. And I even said this was better than anything I ever written before. And now look at me, I think that story isnt that great. Too much meta stuff, which is too easy. Theres some good stuff in it. I like the fake video games I came up with. Welp… Its ok. And welp I hate this world we live in. Im pissed off at everybody for not being cool enough, and Ive got problems with myself. Theres no heroes in this world. Its hopeless… All we can do is take the piss… And piss people off… Its horrible. I really hope I signed up for this. I hope I signed up to be on Earth… Because that would mean it isnt hopeless… Damn it… And yeah I say some words too much like damn it, well, welp, I know what you’re thinking, Im pissed, cool. Anyways its a good idea to clarify what is cool, BUT DAMN IT I couldn’t really tell you… Cause I don’t know… Also I used to not care about getting a girlfriend… But the past few days I cared… A bad idea… Its horrible… Damn it… I need to vandalize Wikitubia pages again… Thats the only cure as it is creative problem solving along with a laughter generator. I cant really laugh that much at other peoples jokes. Even some guy posting a troll post on the visual novels subreddit about asking for a girlfriend, its funny enough of an idea but they couldve done more with the comedy and theres too much obvious jokes. https://x.com/Holsetys/status/1986196425307508753/ Thats a screenshot of the post. Well heres a channel thats very funny, Tony Zaret https://www.youtube.com/@TonyZaret Well just watch the videos from 2022, those were funny. Too much Patreon patrons going around wasting time with the video and putting their niche interest in it because he lets patrons come up with an idea for the video as a reward for the tier. Sometimes he makes fun of the thing that they requested, like his hatred for “Battle for Dream Island” and other “object shows”. He sure hates a lot of the stuff people on the internet say. And the editing is very funny, this guy really knows what hes doing. I forgot to mention him before because I havent watched his videos in a while. He hates memes because they are repetitive and lack substance. Yeah his best videos (Hundreds of them) are much more funny than any regular meme. And yeah some TV shows are pretty funny. I guess the funniest TV show Ive seen is Nathan For You. Its pretty absurd. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S6bAiezJw94 But hey heres some To y Zaret, just watched this one. Very funny. Electric Underground Mark in one stream he implied male people who are picky with female people are gay. And he also insulted the appearance of the Forspoken main character in comments of another video. Well I think hes picky, and should be proud of it. Am I a deranged asocial schizoid? Hmm… I think not. And Im pissed off at Twitter/X. I can barely express myself on there. And there’s nothing being shown that I can reply to with something interesting. And I blame it on the posts not being interesting enough. And I’m not willing to argue with people with such closed minds and narrow thinking. And anyways I have been seeing some JRPG fans insulting people for not liking turn based combat. They arent even fans of the best turn based combat which are grid based games. And I also like Slay the Spire, been playing it recently but havent won yet but got close but the final boss of act 3 had two forms and I couldn’t beat the second form. But Twitter pisses me off, nothing funny or interesting there. Just a bunch of people who think theyre profound jeniuses of the times… Am I a profound jenius of the times? Hmm… Who knows. I was joaking when I said that in the first paragraph of my website. Well its a funny phrase. Ok?! Anyways lets stop complaing about people not beong cool enough. Its not really that big of a deal. Sigh… Every post I see is political in some way, so annoying… Alright I made the character Ian in “Banjo Gagooie” a feminist and he is the most annoying character. Well Ian is based off of some guy who was in animation class who was definitely not a feminist so I mocked him by making him one. And also he got in an argument with the other kid sitting there about if Apex Legends had bunny hopping. I don’t really remember which one thought it did and which one didn’t. But that guy had a problem with me for walking too weird I guess. I dont know if posting that old story was even a good idea. Its too damn weird… But I guess you can see the deepness of my soul in it. Its probably the most disturbing piece of literature ever. Also dont think Im a Japanese video game supremacist just because Tooty/Hirohito is and so is Kwame Jumbo. And also I dont like factory mods of Minecraft more than the vanilla game. And my opinion on sexual harassment that is claimed to be done by South Asians, well belittling them for having worse opinions on gaming might work. That’ll work for any race anyhoo. But I dont really know. Well you could belittle them for not knowing much about game design. Thats a sore point for me, I couldnt really analyze a game. And the whole thing about being born an adult and becoming a kid, well thats just absurd and I knew it was but I was a kid and hated many adults and many so-called kids as well. Well its a tough world and lots to hate. Fine, hate is a strong word. I couldnt really name things I hate that much. Alright theres some bad stuff in Banjo Gagooie. ALRIGHT FINE, THE STORY IS CRINGE. Its a goddamn contrarian mess talking about stuff nobody thinks about. And yeah the story is just dumb on purpose but Im also a little bit sincere in it sometimes. So its just a mess that makes no sense because you cant tell if Im sincere or taking the piss. Alright the story is the most disturbing story ever written. I admit it. It really is. But Im disturbed, what can I say. I had to mock everything I saw on the internet and school and put it in the story and put a bizarre viewpoint on it that nobody has. And theres a bunch of nonsense fantasy and magic. Yeah this is the most disturbing literature ever. Damn it this story was only stopped working on months ago. But this was before I graduated high school. I guess school had taken a toll on me and Ive cooled down since then. But I had to show the story to prove Im not a “poon hound.” Ok?! To show or to be shown is a question never even known not even by many to exist! And I had to prove Im not a degenerate, at least not a sexual degenerate, okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay? But damn it, what was I thinking with this story. Its too dumb… Mortis The Vanquisher is also a story I think isnt good enough. It started decent but got too dumb and Im not even done with chapter 1. It was originally a Rick and Morty inspired story about some guy who is supposedly smarter than Rick. Welp Im a horrible writer. What can I say. Im gonna try to write something better now. Heres the idea, the story of Cray Cray Bootis (A musique concrete rapper mentioned in Mortis The Vanquisher who wrote a suicide note that says “Fuck all you hos reading my suicide note” and he never died and he inspired people in the musique concrete rapping scene into writing suicide notes without committing to suicide.) Alright its November 8 2025 10:10 PM. I was at the mall laughing at the parts of the first chapter I already wrote of my Cray Cray Bootis story which is called Naga Tales. It’s called Naga Tales because Naga is the word they use because they cant say the N word or dont want to say it. Cray Cray Bootis race is a mystery but a person he has a complicated relationship with named Sancho is Mexican and also he is the most famous rapper. Fine so far only Sancho said “Naga.” Well, alright. Anyways this story is my reparations to all the people who read my previous stories and thought they sucked. I think its pretty funny. I came up with fake rap lyrics.

Its November 9 2025 10:50 PM. My mother is illogical thinking Im schizophrenic for laughing at a video. Saying I worry her. Jeez dood, this needs to be parodied in Naga Tales… I dont understand people who cant come to proper conclusions with logic. Im not gonna explain that Im watching a video. Figure it out yourself. And why does she always sing “Nice to meet you, where you been? I could show you incredible things” Which is a bad song and a bad melody and annoying lyrics that make no sense to come out of her mouth. I hate that degenerate song anyway sang by someone with an ego flying with nothing to back it up (The lyric I can show you incredible things, makes no sense even if you think her music is good, because people already know it because its on the radio so its not gonna be shown by her. To show or to be shown is a question never even known by many to exist....) Captain Beefheart is more wholesome with his lyrics. How come people arent singing that? Why isnt everyone doing impressions of his vocals on “Moonlight on Vermont”? And anyways back to the laughing at the video stuff, I also laugh at my own funny stuff. Its just a shame to see such people with no funny bone exist. Im not sharing my jokes. Its too much to ask, you have to deliver the joke perfectly which can be a problem, plus you have to say it out loud which can be a problem when the joke is a fake rap lyric. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LR3s1Yi710U This is the funny video in question. When they do laugh, its at benign crap that nobody with a developed brain should be laughing at because its so simple minded. My mom had the idea thay I should be making an app thats only $1 and if 1 million people buy it I will be a millionaire. Yeah thats not gonna make you a million dollars because the store will take some money. Plus no good software would be only $1.

Alright its November 9 2025 12:56 AM. Anyways I just want to say Cray Cray Bootis is a cool character and should be admired for the most part. Hes not a mockery of anybody. Anyways I think I am the king of comedy with this novel. Also there is some moral themes in the story. So whats the themes. Well Sancho is a god damn idiot who is famous even though he does stupid stuff like release his song exclusively on a porn site as a music video with an epileptic doggystyle scene and its implied he is banging them during the whole music video. Cray Cray Bootis should be more famous than Sancho even though his music doesnt seem like the best. If the world was a fair place, Cray Cray Bootis would be more famous as his music has more artistic merit. Though I guess Sancho and MC Rizlien have funnier lyrics though unintentionally. Talking about “defiling” a whole fast food restaurant’s female employees… What a ridiculous fetish. Man its hilarious. And well Cray Cray Bootis and Sancho have a gay relationship because Sancho is the only person who lets him poop in his thyroid. So far its a mystery as to why a commercial person like Sancho would even like Cray Cray Bootis who only has 30-40 fans. Yeah I only have 0 fans. I used to have fans when I did more boring stuff on the internet. Advertising my boring youtube channel which had no commentary and just gameplay by writing text with blocks in Super Mario Maker 2 telling them to subscribe to my YouTube channel. Barely anybody did. Oh yeah and I had some people like me on Rateyourmusic. Yeah I dont know why the past few days nobody has laughed at anything I said. All I got was 2 likes. And just like Cray Cray Bootis, I wasnt impressed with the people who liked my post that much. I dont know… I got 30 likes for pretending I thought Disco Elysium was an antisexual game on an account I deleted. Well, its alright. Oh look I got 1 like on 1 post and 1 like on another post but there were no notifications. Great… But no follower. Nobody wants to be the first I guess. Well shame… Lets hope that this chapter I have written will get me some fans. I think its hilarious and I came up with a genius premise. Its much more interesting than Mortis The Vanquisher which is kinda like Rick Sanchez but younger, a gamer, an alien, doesnt love anybody (Rick loved a girl), weird, and more. But this character Cray Cray Bootis, well he is more likable of a character. But eh, I think we need to write more Sancho and MC Rizlien lyrics as well. I think the concept of tag team vocals is too funny well at least how it is done in this story. I know Linkin Park has tag team vocals but its not really funny. And the lyrics can be rapped and sung to your own interpretation because theyre not real recorded music. Also I think replying to random people on Twitter with some quotes from the chapter may be very funny. https://x.com/suchnerve/status/1986587644097134726 I dont see why people find this video funny at all. Its very simple minded humor. They just agree with its morals and force a laugh at it. This is a parody of a tired topic. This is why I dont like politics fans that much. They arent very funny. And I know what youre thinking if you found my Letterboxd account, I like The Three Stooges. I didnt link my Letterboxd account in the links but it is CriticOfPloo. Im not really that into watching movies. I like the movie Taxi Driver the most. The reason why is because it is relatable to not really like many people you see except for 1 girl. But eh, back to the video I linked… Its not funny and has a very simple punchline. I know South Park did it when Kyle punched Cartman after he was being rude for such a long time but it wasnt funny there either. Its too obvious of a joke. But Ill give this guy some credit, he made another video mocking people who want to AI generate images of Rick and Morty eating poop. Yeah I admit it, I wanted to see what AI generated when asked to make some characters eat poop. But I did Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory and turned it into Poop Factory. It wasnt really funny though. And even the premise isnt that funny either. Yeah just having people eat poop isnt that funny alone. The joke needs more substance to it. But Three Stooges, its not as simple minded as you’d think. Its pretty funny seeing Larry dig a hole in the yard and telling some guy who got angry to mind his own business and “Beat it” and then while digging he launched dirt behind him onto the guys face. Pretty funny. And Three Stooges has lots of property damage which is cool to see.

Anyways I really like the chapter Ive written of Naga Tales. Im very proud of it. And I know, should we put female characters in Naga Tales. Well maybe. But what type of person could I add. I dont know, I think we’ll just stick to male characters because parodying a female rapper just isnt that comedically interesting and probably would seem offensive. Plus I dont want to listen to that just to mock it. And dont get the wrong idea, I dont hate rap music. My favorite hip hop song is Bring The Noise by Public Enemy. I just think its funny to write bad lyrics. Are Cray Cray Bootis lyrics bad like Sancho and MC Rizlien’s? Well.. Theyre better. Cray Cray Bootis isnt trying to be funny on purpose in his lyrics though. Nobody is in this story. The lyrics are entirely sincere. And other female characters to add, well I dont think any of the characters could have a girlfriend. People seem to think its weird to have no female characters in a story. Well this story is just about a musique concrete rapper who hates famous rappers. Oh yeah and is Cray Cray Bootis misogynistic, well he isnt, he even gave his house to a female dancer when he couldve just dragged her outside of the house. Oh yeah Cray Cray Bootis has a mother. Well I forgot about her because she only says one thing in a flashback. Well, maybe she’ll be an important character to a degree. So people say they wouldnt read a story with no female characters. Well I think my story is very funny so dont be so closed minded. Alright fine, Cray Cray Bootis is morally objectionable of a character. Or is he, just because he gassed on a girl doesnt mean he is sexist. You know one time in 9th grade in the hallway I farted in the direction of a couple who were acting annoying. I imagined that the other kid who was in my history class and was in the same area was saying in his head something like “Good job, you’re a hero.” Yeah I farted on both of them. And he wasnt farting on her because she didnt want to shag. Its just because gassing in her direction gives him the same feeling of shagging so it doesnt really matter. But yeah he doesnt like shagging or farting as much as pooping in a thyroid. Well this has gone South. Eh dont take this too seriously because when I was writing those “Name of the Game” lyrics, I wasnt trying hard enough. But we will see better lyrics from Cray Cray Bootis. Plus that song was from 2012, perhaps he has changed as a person.

Well fine.. Politics arent that bad… The show NewsRadio has a lot of political jokes. And its a funny show. I watched it at 2 AM on network television when I was in 8th grade.

Well I listened to Kendrick Lamars 11 minute song which is the number 1 hip hop song on RYM. This song is too silly to take seriously. I was laughing but dont get the wrong idea, I wasnt laughing as hard as I was at my own lyrics. Only laughing a little. But yeah the chorus is too weird. I dont really see how this is the best hip hop song. The lyrics are cliche and there is a gunshot sound effect. Rhyming fuck with duck, come on how is this taken so seriously. And one of the characters starts talking about wearing superhero underwear. Scaruffi was right, Public Enemy is better. But even Public Enemy isnt that good because one of peoples favorite songs of theirs just samples a Slayer riff which is too obvious of a sample. Same wrih Death Grips Exmilitary, too many obvious samples. Well the lyrics of the number 1 rap song on RYM “Held him like a newborn baby and made him feel Like everything was alright and a fight he tried to put up.” Kind of weird to have a space between the word feel and like. Just sounds kinda dumb and doesnt sound like they worked hard enough to make the lyrics fit and sound good because hes continuing the sentence after a pause in the middle awkwardly. Then hes rapping about demons. Kinda silly to put fantastical stuff in a song like this. The song “Bring The Noise” does a better job at making the lyrics sound good. Well Kendrick Lamars song King Kunta is better, sounds like Ella Guru by Captain Beefheart with a high pitched girl voice in the background. But yeah in Captain Beefhearts song Ella Guru only says something once. And in this song, only the first high pitched female voice part sounds good. Well fine the chorus sounds good I guess. Kendrick Lamar shouldve done the high pitched voice himself, I assume Captain Beefheart did the high pitched voice himself.

I dont know what South Park is doing. If they wanted to be the most controversial, make a full episode about Donald Trump and Kamala Harris having sex for 20 minutes. That would piss off both left and right wing people. But I know what youre thinking, many left wing people also hate Kamala Harris and many right wing people hate Donald Trump. Well fine, make it a whole orgy. And have Randy Marsh try to enter the orgy and they refuse because hes not a politician and he will break and be criticizing them for being bad at banging and they will whine and Randy Marsh will say “I’m a true elite. I’m more elite than you. Do you even listen to atonal music?” And then he would play a guitar solo with his ballsack which is giant which would be some fanservice to the time his ballsack was giant. And he has a band with Butters on second guitar and Token on bass. And they would be ripping it up playing awesome music that pisses off the politicians. Then they would be singing “Smash the system with a song!!!” And then Oprah comes in and her Virginia starts talking which is another callback to an older episode. And Randy Marsh says “Hello Michelle Obama.” Then Oprah comes in and says “How did you know my true identity?” Then Randy Marsh would be like “What does that even mean?” Because he thought she was Michelle Obama so her sentence makes no logical sense with the beliefs he has. But yeah her Virginia is talking and saying “I want a god damn lunch that is healthy for kids.” Then well the episode is going to be hated because theyre god damn talking about random politics bullcrap that is outdated and everyone is gonna be so angry at the episode for being too weird. This would really piss everyone off. This is what would really tick everyone off. Donald Trumps ween size would be 4 inches because a really small one is too cliche of an insult. But why don’t they put a cool guy like Geddy Lee (Matt and Trey’s favorite bass player) in there and give him a 12 inch one. I know what youre thinking, Geddy Lee might hate this episode too. But yeah he wont be banging because in his own words in the episode “I’m a family guy.” And then they insult Family Guy again after hearing that phrase and that would piss even more people off. Then they will watch a fake episode of Family Guy in the house (Oh yeah and it’s Stan’s house that they are in because Donald Trump bought it after it was sold in the episode “Tegridy Farms”) and also they would be mocking the Family Guy episode that is fake and all the politicians will be laughing a little bit while m-bating to the art of the show because they all have a Family Guy art style fetish. So what politicians will be in the episode? Well Donald Trump, Kamala Harris, JP Vance, Netanyahu, Thomas Marvin Crooks Jr, Justin Trudeau, Vladimir Putin, Richie Sunak (Who has ginger hair in this episode, this is a reference to Happy Days which is a show that had a ginger guy named Richie in it, and every time he talks he acts like he is living in the 1950s), Kim Jong Un, Recep Tayyip Erdogan, Oprah/Michelle Obama, Barack Obama, Dick Cheney Clone, Gerald Ford Clone (He calls himself The Hulk and painted himself green), a fake politician, Kanye West (Who the politicians call Kane West, just a nonsense joke), Kendrick Lamar (Who has a rap scene and don’t worry, he participates in the orgy for 1 second and says “I don’t like it. How about no, and I hope I didn’t get AIDS from touching that for 1 second” (The South Park writers like to joke about AIDS) and he can reference his song that is the number one hip hop song on RYM and say “I’m wearing dun-ta-duns, they barely fit with this erection. Anyone here know of a good video game that can get my attention so I can get rid of this erection?” That’ll be a good time to reference a video game and I will tell you which game they should reference later), Taylor Swift (Apparently one of the creators' daughters likes Taylor Swift, well they probably have an inferno in them knowing that… Just kidding, they probably dont care that much but shes in the episode anyway) Also lets hope the South Park creators got better taste in video games and dont go around putting in Red Dead Redemption 2 or Baldurs Gate 3 references and instead go for Super Monkey Ball references (This will allow them to have an alliance with Smiling Friends (Who put a Super Monkey Ball reference in an episode) to make way for a crossover episode (I’m not really a fan of Smiling Friends, maybe I would be if I was younger and watched TV more often) or Slay The Spire references (And they will insult the game Hades for having severe metaprogression). I feel like if they did this, people would not know how to respond to it. Pedestrians of comedy are already doing comedy analysis saying “Two old men naked in a hot tub isn’t funny or insulting."

Oh yeah I remember why I thought I was the reincarnation of Jim Morrison. Its because I think I came up with the lyric “The blue bus is calling us” before I ever heard it in The End. Yeah kinda wierd theory. Its November 16 2025 and I finished chapter 2 of Naga Tales. I think its a pretty interesting chapter. Anyway Ive been trolling on Twitter/X. I only do this to advertise this website. Trolling for reactions is pointless because youre not gonna get an interesting reaction from these cliche simpletons. Ive been saying the word cliche a lot. Ive been watching stand up comedians, theyre very cliche. I saw Nick Mullens special Year of the Dragon. Its pretty good but none of the jokes made me laugh for more than 10 seconds and also many of the jokes were cliche but less cliche. The beginning isnt that good with self deprecating wiener jokes, too cliche for me. So I didnt watch the thing for a year because I thought it was gonna be boring and I didnt even feel like watching it to mock it. But I watched it and it was good with some good absurd points like its not ableist to make fun of a dead disabled person (He talks about Stephen Hawking for a long time) becuase theyre not disabled in Heaven. Never thought about that because I dont insult disabled people much. Thats the best stand up comedy Ive seen but that doesnt mean its that great. And I barely seen any. George Carlin is a hack, he doesnt seem to be that profound and is too cliche. John Mulaney New In Town is annoying and also too cliche. And I looked at Nanette, pretty dumb but I guess you cant say its cliche. Well the things they say are cliche to a degree, but not for a comedy special. Yeah I dont really think these stand up comedians are that funny.

Jeez https://x.com/Nan_dre_/status/1990649299282374956 Some guy posts something like “You wont guess what this is in reply to.” To my post “Cliche "relatable" comedy gets owned by the Andy Kaufman of the 21st century. I see no problem. This guy Mr. Frost (named after a poet, seems like he had a genius upbringing) Never heard of this guy, but seems like a genius. Even has Jewish decoration in the background, heh.” This was a reply to the guy complaining about an obnoxious streamer telling a less obnoxious lady to shut the fuck up. Jeez the gaming streaming community cant tell a simple joak. Its not my best joak. And yes it is a trolling attempt.

Hopefully this gets me some fans. But jeez, how can nobody tell Its an obvious joak. I said his parents named him after a poet after I called him Mr. Frost. Robert Frost is the poet. And his parents didnt choose their kids last name. I thought that joke was cliche, but nobody seems to know it. Pfft, idiots. It’s 12:27 AM November 18 2025. Jeez… And I said there was Jewish decoration in the background. Its just blue fucking curved lines (I know theyre called curves in math and not called curved lines but I am trying to be clear plus they are called curved lines in art) on a white wall. Its not Jewish except for the color scheme. Its obviously not intended to be Jewish decoration. And I compared him to Andy Kaufman, makes no sense when this guy is just an idiot streamer who knows nothing. Well this guy isnt getting that much likes, only 14 and its been 18 minutes and he has 13k followers. Because he posted a cliche joke. I dont know if hes mocking me or trying to coast off of my funniness. Come on, I dont even know that many poets. But surely everyone knows Robert Frost because they were forced to read The Outsiders in school which references him. And who would really think this guy is a genius if all they saw was him shout a sentence that has been uttered by man so many times? Come on… Its an obvious joak. How not 1 of thousands saw this, its idiotic. And I know the true comedy experts (Qualified ones) will say its not the funniest joak. I know, I came up with funnier ones. This is just the best I could come up with on the spot because Im trying to find posts to troll so I get fans. Its simple as that. But its obviously funnier than the “Brat” album cover with the word “jihad” on it which got 200k likes. How is that funny at all? And that album Brat sucks. It sounds pretty generic to me. I guess people cant laugh at my joke (I dont know if its worthy of being called a “joak” because it was too easy) because they laughed at the cliche relatable comedy and now they think Im mocking them. Come on… Tony Zaret made fun of Deltarune and compared its humor to a Disney channel sitcom and nobody complained. I tried searching up for people who hate Deltarune, couldnt find a single post of someone saying they hate Deltarune on Google (which would make Reddit posts show up) I guess I could check Twitter/X, probably more there. But the point is that people like Deltarune a lot. I dont know… Just seems like this world is so cliche. And people into these streamers arent going to be laughing at my jokes because they watch streamers who have a lot of bad gaming opinions and are content with it. Well at least people are getting trolled. I cant believe people thought I was being serious. Come on… I follow only 4 people on Twitter. Does it seem like I am going to like a goddamn idiot generic streamer who tries hard to be funny and cool but isnt unique? Theres so many of them, I would be following so many of them already. Damn it Im wasting my time looking at this crap. Not a single interesting reply, why even reply at all if youre gonna say some cliche bullcrap. Well looked at this nandre who made the quote tweet of me’s stream. He fake laughed at a clip of himself. Well who really cares… These people saying OMEGALUL at some benign shiet… Horrible…

November 19 2025 4:16 PM I had a dream that David Lynch directed a lot of pornos and one was a kinda Lucky Star blue hair anime girl (Never watched it) lesbian porno that was very well animated. They were humping with no strap on. It was very colorful. All his other pornos were live action and not dissimilar to those in real life. But eh none of them tickled my fancy that much, not even the hentai one. I also trolled a Doors fan with a fake review of the Doors and he sent an angry private message on some old looking website which was where I wrote the review pretending to hate the Doors for some reason. And well I couldnt bear to read it. Also the band Van der Graaf Generator made 2 movies that I considered my most favorite movies in the dream but I forgot what happened in them and I watched a movie which kinda looked like Marx Brothers movies and I liked it. Dont really remember my dreams that well but this one I remembered.

Here’s my fake Best TV list for trolling purposes, people arent gonna know what to do with a guy like this. 1. NewsRadio 2. Hazbin Hotel 3. Seinfeld 4. Fawlty Towers 4. Monty Python's Flying Circus 5. South Park 6. Star Trek Deep Space Nine 7. Arthur 8. Wild Kratts (While LARPing) 9. Star Trek TNG 10. Simpsons 11. Futurama 12. FiFF 13. 3RFTS 14. CYE 15. KOTH 16. Yu-Gi-Oh

I forgot about Nathan for You.

Here’s the real list 1. Simpsons 2. South Park 3. Nathan for You 4. NewsRadio 5. Seinfeld 6. Star Trek Deep Space Nine 7. Star Trek The Next Generation 8. Futurama 9. It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia 10. 3rd Rock from the Sun 11. Fawlty Towers 12. Curb Your Enthusiasm 13. 13. F is for Family

Seinfeld is a pretty funny show I watched some Kramer clips yesterday. Hes the funniest character. Funny part is going into a store as H.E. Pennypacker. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHjcSwwYKNY This is a pretty good collection. I dont really watch television these days. Well check my Letterboxd CriticOfPloo and see my watchlist. I’ll be watching some films soon. Maybe tonight I’ll watch one.

I had a dream that a girl kept on criticizing my stories and posts on the internet and I dont remember if I saw her face but I imagined she had a good one. Also she got mad that Scaruffi called me a genius (In the dream) So I tried to write a good story. I forgot I wrote Naga Tales in real life during the dream because I wouldnt get self conscious about the story being bad because I know its good. She seemed smart and also kinda wanted to make her my girlfriend. Welp… Also dont get the wrong idea, Im not really caring about getting a girlfriend. I was last week but now my focus is on joaking and being creative. 4 weeks ago, my focus was on finding obscure progressive rock music that I liked. I think Ill be focusing on joaking for a long time.

God…. Idiot parents not teaching ther kid how to play Chess and bragging about them “playing it” https://x.com/MrsGoresDiary/status/1991515182984753204 And theres videogames (and boardgames, though the point is theyd probably restrict them from playing videogames) with more depth than Chess plus there is a problem with Chess which is having to memorize openings. Nobody seems to have a problem with this bad parenting. Well I say let them all suffer… No need to give good advice… Everyone can suffer because they arent cool enuf n’ stuf.

Well the theory that I am the reincarnation of Jim Morrison could be true. Because I look like Viktor Tsoi to a degree who is called the Jim Morrison of the Soviet Union. Well I wouldnt really want to be the reincarnation of Jim Morrison that much. Well fine, it would be good.

Woeman seducing story: “This your corespodnent running out of day. Lunging my creases and the duty of well. And I say to you farewell. This is your corespondent running out of day. To the enemy of shell (Shell). Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right.” Then she says “She said, she said, I know what it’s like to be dead.” Then you say “Beat Alan!” She says “From Arthur?” “Wow.. You know Brain’s real name from Arthur? Wow… That’s a good reference.” She says “I hate that show, its for kids.” Then I say “Theres an Arthur with no door, hes living without a care. At nights it gets old, because of the laiden there is to bare.” She says “What does that mean?” I say “It means straight up.” She says “I’m falling through my head.” I say “Listen to the sound. I wouldn’t cut a hole in it, in its handle. Strangled the side of a deserted inuit and I saw a sexless genie but don’t let the judge shame her. A jalopee was loaded. Roll down roll down, to cream pretty. You’ll never feel the noise in cream pretty. But he’s up in the other side of town, trying to talk to the curer.” She says “Banish the ghoulie ghoulie scam scam scam.” I say “Peanine is a tinkly bum wassel. Am I dig it?” She says “Ba, nah nah.” I say “I’ve got one, but don’t scream. Because it’s not a record. But this great new septic dance knows how to make me emancipate the imagination. And you know and I cummididllydum on the snare drum which is in the bathroom where a lady zoomed in because she wanted to sigh. Night time comes to bring the slums a treat like a dog who whines. But managers in laden lands will never pussy up with the Laden signs. In single trifles, the steak that mothers make is seen although it cannot go to the wilds of bah bahs, meh mehs, and woofs. And for a while, you won’t know the game.” She says “Is it Sektori?” I say “Yes. A man with a vaporous car has passed it on, for me to take the puff. Perhaps I will pay the ultimate price with latinum.” She says “Do I look like a Ferengi?” I say “With your mercury mouth, in the missionary position. And your eyes like a cork, and your presents like a chime. Oh who among us, could stall em? With your pockets wet, protected by the paat. And the visions of the sheet that you pressed on the mast, and who among us, could carry the dew?” She says “An old man prophet says that gold man drums, yes.” I say “Perhaps a ginger bread man drums.” She says “What is the bread to be found? Isn’t the one with the bread loafs made of gold?” I say “The old man wanssons like they all do. Gypity quarter press of low profit and gold man cums.” She says “Boney maracas… Should I plum them on the state?” I say “Breath, I should wait.” She says “But you have waited for the man who came in the vaporous car for must’ve been 3 days.” I say “Why I had no problem with the vaporousness, but it seems you have rum sum sum, rum sum sum, seely seely seely seely rum sum summed the sum of the forum.” She says “Who among them do you think could give you a computer virus?” I said “The prophet says the old man comes.” She says “Listen to another song.” I say “Fine, we shall. Oh, the old man’s back again. Perhaps gangsters will not bring up the old man for they killed him in their van but their girlfriend wanted to bang one but they jizzed in 10 seconds and she wanted more.” She says “I know it’s only lust.” I say “Woeman of the night, warrior of the fight, Donkey of the bite, mango of the tribe, cold night of the boney. Sweat of the devour. Buddy of the gunst. Change will do you NUDD.” She says “Fuddy!!!!!!” And well thats how you seduce a woeman, and if you arent familiar with the term “woeman,” it means a person who only plays Roblox. Just kidding, thats what I used to define that term but it really has no correlation. Hmm.. What should woeman mean? Wow… Well is this how you seduce someone? Let me know if several heads became one. And don’t sneer. We were at peace in that park. It was called Jizuelo Park. Two bands I got into are Kino and Watchtower. Already knew both of them for a few months or a month but got into them now. Also is this horrible? Well I spent 5 hours writing this masterpiece of love. Its a true masterpiece of love. If you dont get it, well teach your kids how to play Chess if theyre gonna take the chessboard out at least. Well whoever reads this website. My target audience is everybody anyway. Mainly aliens though. Yeah did you know if you hue shifted Jodie Foster purple, they ARE MORE ATTRACTIVE?! Fine, not really more attractive but equally attractive. But hey. What can I say. Also I havent been writing my story for the past few days. Trying networking but it hasnt been working. The reason why it doesnt work is because Im too antagonistic. Also maybe people dont respect 18 year olds or the Vietnamese or progressive rock fans. I dont know really the reason. Fine I am never adding to someones post by making a joke of the same vein to go alongside it. Because their jokes all suck and I dont know how they live with themselves with jokes of little substance or at least a funny premise. They keep doing cliche observational humor. God damn it… They think they can observe?! They are part of the 95% (Of people with bad gaming opinions). And many of the 5% would have bad gaming opinions if they knew more games… Im not jealous of Osama Bin Laden. Also he has bad gaming opinions but thats a tangent. Anyways when I was 15 I was killing people in Saints Row 2 for hours imagining it was people in real life and the internet. Well, Ive been frustrated with this world for a long time! Since I was 6 I said “everyone except me is a noob!” That isnt true which is good news. Theres good in this world… I only follow 4 people on Twitter… Im considering following Nick Mullen, Piero Scaruffi, Hideki Kamiya. But I dont know if their posts are good enough. And obviously those three are good for other reasons. But back to Saints Row 2, damn it I was angry at this girl who accused me of being a homophobe because I didnt want to do icebreakers on the first day of school with her and her friend who steals art supplies from art class. I thought lesbians were supposed to be anti establishment. And icebreakers are part of the establishment, dog. They didnt even know what the word musician means (Which was one of the icebreakers). And they said their favorite singer was Melanie Martinez. Probably a bad choice. Sounds generic. Well thats not my problem with them. A bigger musical problem with them is when her friend who was fat (Descirbing them, also she was lesbian too) said “Country” when Yellow Submarine was playing. But eh those people were dumb and I acted more autistic than usual there to get them to feel bad. Thats not a joke and dont laugh because if it was a joke, its not that funny of one, its cliche. That classroom was too cold anyway and I didnt do my work because I had to put my hands in my sleeves. But one time I did my work much faster than everyone else and when I finished it, she changed the assignment because everybody else couldnt do it at all and I had to do another assignment. Well I didnt do that damn other assignment. School is a joke and I hate these damn DEGENERATES! Theyre not degenerate for being lesbian anyway. But these people are all idiots. Eh those people kinda looked like “groupies” and if you started doing bad R&B to get groupies, well I think you made a bad decision because they arent the most attractive. Its practically “Zhamashura,” which is a concept that will be explained in Naga Tales Chapter 3. Zhamashura is seen as a spiritual experience of being half bored and half engaged and settling for something that is less than ideal and seeing how good of a time you can get. But Zhamashura will probably be scolded in the book of Numob (The same book which praised it in the beginning, IS THIS PARRALELS TO MALCOLM X WHO IS KNOWN FOR CHANGING HIS OPINIONS?!) which will be mentioned in Naga Tales Chapter 3. If you dont get what Im saying, Im coming up with a religion that is based around a guy named Numob. And also its a political ideology too. Ok? Cant say Im impressed with any of Led Zeppelin’s groupies on google images either. I thought I was, but it happened to be John Paul Jones. Thats a joake (Midway point between joak and joke) BTW. My mom came in here its 2:00 AM and she wants me to sleep. Well Im not going to. Also checking if Im sleeping at 2 AM just encourages to jack it at 4 AM where its more guaranteed there will be no barging. So she didnt think it through anyway. My mouth has a bunch of canker sores and swollen gums. Well this is because of goddamn malnutrition that wouldnt have happened if she didnt force me to take antidepressants that I dont need. Now that Im off them, theres a bunch of side effects like low appetite. It should be illegal to give antidepressants to a child if theres no proof of them having a GODDAMN PROBLEM. I was fed up and it was time to disturb the peace. And then they thought I was a loon. If I had one of those curly hairdos or was black, they wouldnt think I was a loon. I blame the goddamn annoying people talking without saying anything interesting in the goddamn study hall. And their voices are DEMONIC! I hate so much… Though I dont hate anything the most… Dont have a number one enemy… School was horrible, they barely taught you anything except in history class. English class kept on making you create posters for days which doesnt teach you anything about literature. Didnt even make a poster, just sat there while everyone else did. I’m not doing this embarassing crap, have to make a poster, probably have to make it very CLICHE to get a high grade… Not that I wanted to do something experimental… Have to draw some pictures as if I care about what Im drawing… They make you make the poster about a book before the class even finished reading it. Just a bunch of idiots anyway… At least they laugh at your slapstick comedy. But eh the girl who laughed at my “slapstick comedy” was probably lesbian. And Im not interested. Oh yeah and she said she hated the freshmen as a sophomore at the table even though I was one then though maybe she didnt know. Well.. Thats a pointless story. And the slapstick comedy was just being behind a bunch of desks that were connected as a rectangle and people were standing out of the area where I could leave from behind the desks because they were looking at a paper on the wall which had a math problem and I probably went over one of the desks after waiting for them to leave which they didnt. Heres my review for Lego Skywalker Saga, thats not the title but you know whag Im talking about if you google that. “This game treats you like a baby. Yeah I wasnt impressed and you know the school secuirty guard told me he wanted to play it he probably was disappointed. He quit the job probably cause the kids there werent cool enough. Same with a ginger guy training to be a teacher, he probably only liked a few people in that history class. They didnt answer his question about socialism. But hey the other history teacher the real one was funnier. Though his comedy was a little cliche. But its actually less cliche than John Mulaney, George Carlin, and more. That teacher looked like Charlie Kirk and sounded like Ben Shapiro. But I didnt have the best eyesight so I didnt know what he really looked like. Maybe Ill check his Facebook. Fine, he doesnt look like Charlie Kirk but he did with my bad eyesight“ Well that teacher imitated people who didnt like womans suffrage voters saying “THEYRE HOORS!” Well its funnier because its history related. He hated 90s music calling it whiny and he played Panama by Van Halen when we were learning about the Panama Canal. Also we were learning about the 50s and we watched a video of Elvis and a girl said Elvis was stupid and the teacher said she would be one of the girls screaming in the video if she was from that time period. Also a weird kid said he was only attracted to women for their bodies (He parodied Jonny Jonny Yes Papa saying Jonny Jonny, yes papa, Fucking women, no papa. Telling lies, no papa! (And I don’t know what he replaced “Open your mouth” with or if he even sang that part.)) and the teacher said when theyre old their body parts will be coming off so you have to like them for their personality. Well pretty wierd. But yeah he really did have similarities to those political guys. Dont laugh, because its not funny. Just a serious observation. That history class was pretty good. And yeah the ginger guy, he quit the job without telling why. The real teacher said “Its not because of you guys.” But it probably was. Hopefully he didnt take offense to the time I slept in that class. I slept when the regular teacher was doing funny stuff too and when he was telling interesting facts. It was a dilemma because I liked both listening and sleeping. Anyways I think a lot of girls liked me in school, some anime fans, a Kpop fan (She complimented me for doing a marathon on field day. Many people did that and I didnt even do good. She sang on online school thinking her microphone was off and left because she was embarrassed), another Kpop fan (She was Indian, In 4th grade I wrote a story called “Potato family” with her cousin (Who was cooler) and two other people), and many girls in the hallways probably. Oh yeah and the degenerate who kept touching my hair and she was fat and racist. Dont get offended that I said fat before racist. Im simply describing their appearance first. She was Hispanic. Very annoying person… She also said “DAAAAAAAMN.” In the hallways to me. And there was another degenerate in the hallway complimenting me next to some other male and also some female people. Well at least there was a cool seeming girl who liked my hair, she was a senior when I was a freshman. She called me bud. Well cool… But a lot of these people werent that cool… Oh yeah and my 12th grade math teacher might have had the hots for me because she kept trying to make me personally laugh by being relatable and I dont think she did that with other students but the jokes didnt work because they know nothing about me. I guess I fake laughed out of PITY!!!!!

Tomorrows Thanksgiving. Hopefully no lemon zest happens. My hair is at a good length. Yeah Im kidding but still feel like something bad could happen. I think Im handsome and more attractive than every Asian in the world that Ive seen. Caucasian males who look like girls might look more attractive than me (Like Greg Lake in some photos in 70s, Robert Wyatt in a old photo from early 70s I cant find (People in the Canterbury Scene discord were calling him a femboy when they saw that photo, so dont think Im offbeat)) Dont get the wrong idea, Im not gay. But I think Im quite handsome in the mirror. But only sometimes when the hair is at the right angle. But thats ok becuase my favorite actress (Sorry, not chosen for acting skills but I never cared about acting skills) I dont rrally care about 90% of the photos of them anyway. Yeah Im not sure Im too into the whole human attraction thing. But I try anyway. So yeah I think I look cool but have a hard time taking pictures. I guess the mirror in that room is just very good lighting. But cameras dont do good, not the best technology with the camera on the devices. Welp, its a shame. But who cares, my looks are good enoguh for me to realistically jack it (Because it wouldnt make sense to be banging this girl if I didnt look that cool, Its f’d up in the ASS that looking cool is so important. Plus the pedophile female teacher had the hots for another student anyway. But she wasnt attractive really so who cares. And she didnt bang him. She said he looked cute and encouraged a kid to date him. Sounds inappropriate to me. Eh but a girl I liked but no longer like (She was too memey jeebies) drew clown attire on his yearbook photo and wrote the word “Clown” allegedly so he isnt that well liked anyway. He once asked a kid who once called me “relevant” if he was left wing or right wing and the other kid thought he was talking about the court in basketball. I think I look cool and maybe this girl at the mall was looking at me and also her mother was whining about misreading a coupon so she probably felt embarrassed but who cares Im not even interested.). Also Im writing “Laurence of India” which is a book about Bruce Springsteen, the Illuminati, and there will be scenes in India and saving them and encouraging them to act more Illuminating (Illuminati-like). Theres a movie about a fan of Bruce Springsteen who is from India. I just searched up Bruce Springsteen India to see if there was something funny to find out. Well Im not watching the movie because it probably isnt that good. I like the album “The River” Scaruffi knows his stuff because this is his favorite and I did listen to some tracks from others, wasnt as good. The song “Born To Run” is in RYM top 200, if this was the only song I heard, I wouldnt want to listen to more. Its fine though. The River is a great album with interesting melodies, some sound mocking, some sound cool. The vocals are cool though I wasnt too into them when I listened to it months ago. But hey its nice and unique. So yeah Im glad to like Bruce Springsteen. My old simpleton random offshore quick jotted joke about him being an Illuminati member actually have a lot of substance if you listen to his lyrics. Dont get the wrong idea, I dont really believe in Illuminati. But its funny to pretend you do. And it also is calming so maybe I should believe in it. Because with the theory of Illuminati I have, they control the people we hate. And the people we like are winning all the time. Anyways we will explain who is Illuminati and who isnt in the book. Hopefully my mom doesnt barge in my room again anyway because its annoying to be interrupted. She needs to stop wasting my time… Ill try reading more books and seeing more funny stuf… Cumtown Ive seen some stuff its pretty funny but hit or miss. Well I like that they talk about some cool stuff. The Adam Friedland Show is interesting and can be funny though mostly not from jokes. It was funny when he accused Anthony Fantano of wanting Paul McCartney to sing a lullaby in the Abbey Road Medley when he sang “And I will sing you a lullaby,” Back when I listened to this album more often in 2022, I thought when I heard that lyric that what followed was supposed to be the lullaby anyway. Doesnt sound like a lullaby obviously but maybe its his idea of one. Im not a fan of Anthony Fantano because his opinions arent that good and also he brags about sexual intercourse like were jealous. Plus he insults conservatives saying they cant make good art. Guess he doesnt like Jethro Tull (Well just searched, Ian Anderson changed his party) or Mike Oldfield (He is a Trump supporter). Well speaking of Mike Oldfield, when I finally got the idea of getting a girlfriend after years of not caring about the idea well I listened to the album and was so emotional and my heart was beating fast. But anyway I dont really care about the idea of getting a girlfriend anymore. Im working on my stories and also playing Sektori while listening to Bruce Springsteen and also looking for funny stuf and also trying to troll and advertise. Maybe should advertise after Ive written more chapters. Anyways “Derpy Rainbowz,” who is this man? We have been talking on Twitter/X. Well he is an old man who is very cool. He was in comedy clubs for 5 years. He lived in the jungle and played jungle games with the children. I tried to get him to change his memey jeebies name but he sticks by it. He loves or loved the word derp. Which is fine, South Park writers invented it anyway but he probably didnt get it from that. He wants to see Eric Claptons sex tapes, I dont know why he think those will be any good. I dont know if he is that well spoken so the audio might be worth muting. They probably dont have a good camera. And well he is probably tag teaming with George Harrison in some of them so it will never get released anyway. So he should not wait any longer for something that is never coming and wouldnt be that good anyway unless George Harrison has pointy hair like in Beatles for Sale music video than it could be the funniest sex video EVAR!!!!! “Oh yeah lick at that pointy hair. Its sharp. Like it? Then lick it.” Anthony Fantano isnt that cool really. Has he ever mentioned Van der Graaf Generator? The Residents? Mike Oldfield? Soft Machine? Robert Wyatt? If he has its very rare. And a crap ton of good stuff he never talks about. But who cares… All Im saying is that I dont see any reason to watch his channel. And his personality isnt that cool and he isnt funny. Anyways there is anti-gaming sentiment, I dont really get why they think every gamer isnt contributing to society. Also they say they are against gaming as a whole, seems like they dont even play board games with their family. Plus it seems a folly argument to insult gaming when there are puzzle games which are obviously better than jigsaw puzzles and other puzzles in real life. Sure there are puzzles that can be written on a paper. And sure you could put many puzzle games as a picture on a paper and just write the rules of the game at a blank spot of the paper and then someone can write the solution. But obviously it would be better as a video game. So what about action games, well most of them are bad but they can be good and I dont really see whats so bad about playing one of them. Dont see how playing games is worse than listening to music anyway, especially because most people listen to bad music (Though it is true most people play bad games). Do these people sit and look at the album cover for the whole duration when they listen to an album? You can do that, but I dont see whats so bad about playing a game while listening to music. Sure you a gamer can argue that you should focus more on the game so you do better at it. Well do they turn the games music off? When I tried playing rhythm games (Stepmania) I just wanted to play it with the music off so I could focus and the songs werent good enough for me. There was a funny Wonderwall dubstep (Might not be the right term) remix. Well thats the only song from the song pack I downloaded that I could stand. Guy said it was the best song pack. Jeez…. Well tomorrows Thanksgiving but probably wont have to be there for long. My gums dont hurt anymore for the most part. Tongue still has canker sores. Anyways its a cruel world we live in. Learned one of my favorite family members was circumcised a few months ago. Horrid… His mom mentioned that at a sushi place… What is the dullest and bluntest of pains?! Circumcision!!!!!!! And many years ago she made it clear that she thought I was an idiot. And she only let her children play on devices for 10 minutes on the weekdays or at least she used to. Jeez…. You couldnt even 1-ALL a Psikyo game in that amount of time. And I have 1-ALLed the shmup Strikers 1945 II. Only other ones I have are Dodonpachi kinda (Died at the last hard second of the game, if I survived a little bit more than I would have won because I had 4 bombs in stock which would kill the boss, but I wouldve won also if I used my other 2 bombs (I had 6 bombs) at different times because the bullets wouldve lasted for less time but I didnt know that at the time (I used those 2 bombs consecutively) but I tested later and found that I couldve won if I used those bombs at different times. Anyways I didnt really care to finish it because I practically won and wanted to play some other games) and Touhou 7 Perfect Cherry Blossom Normal which was easy. You know Touhou 7 PCB Lunatic Stage 6 is easier than Touhou 11 UFO Lunatic Stage 2. Thats what I found when I tried playing both of those in practice mode. And its not like any of Touhou 7’s stage 1-5 are harder than UFO Stage 2 either. Well thats what I found… Anyways I think I like twin stick shooters better than shmups (Well the games Sektori and Nex Machina). Sektori is a new game and its very good and has lots of randomness and even has a bunch of modes that I havent tried yet because I havent beaten the main mode and havent even unlocked them yet. Very spiritual. I guess these anti gamers dont realize how spiritual GAMING IS!!!!! Its not much different from thinking watching Rashomon is a replacement of going to the forest and having a spiritual journey (Because the movie is mainly in a forest, probably more beautiful than your nearest forest). Yeah we dont need to go to the forest and have a spiritual journey there. Or maybe we do, well Im not an expert. Yeah… Anyways Naga Tales will return… I just havent been writing it… Damn it I keep on changing my goals all the time.

Its December 3 2025. Damn it I still havent added all these 4698 words to my website yet which start with the part where I talk about my dream. Well if youre reading this I added it already. But sorry for not putting stuff on my website for a long time. Anyways Ive been trying to make music. I think I can do decent but I guess I just keep on going without really caring how good some parts are. I really like Bruce Springsteens music. The River is the best. But Im warmed up to the albums Darkness, and the two Born albums… Yeah I dont feel like typing the full titles. The album Nebraska, didnt feel like listening to it. Because what I like about Bruce Springsteens music is kinda not fitting for such acoustic singer songwriting but I barely listened to it so who knows…. Anyways Laurence of India I will have released the two chapters by the time you see this message. Ive been watching Matthewmatosis streams and well he doesnt seem to know about the game Sektori neither do his fans. But he would probably like it a lot since he said Nex Machina is practically perfect and he also enjoys the game. Well Derpy Rainbowz left a comment. Anyways I didnt watch the streams for that long really. Just skim through the transcripts after its done. Mark of the Electric Underground hasnt posted an update for an upcoming video in over a month, but I dont really care that much. I dont really play games that much lately. Well fine I do but only for about an hour and a half. And I only play one game at a time for the past month. Well.. Its fine and dandy. Anyways I think my parents wipe the jizz off with tissues because the trash can in the bathroom keeps having tissues or paper towel (Didnt check) in it at a rapid rate daily. Couldnt really think of another reason why someone would be throwing something out in that bathroom trash can everyday. Why did I say that? Well its just a showcase to show how observant I am. Want to hear another brag? I was the only person in finance class who got every question right on a few multiple choice quizzes. Wooooo… But dont think Im good at finance because I forgot everything. And I got a lot of questions wrong on the Kahoots. But still got the award of most questions answered correctly in the Kahoot. And that is not a special ed class. So yeah I think the schools are pretty bad at teaching. And even the assignments are just from some company that gives Google Docs out. So even that company that makes the assignments is bad at teaching. Is this Trumanali business? You will learn the meaning of Trumanali in Laurence of India chapter 2. Alright I’ll just say it. It is a branch of the Illuminati who is sundered from them now because they were too evil but they still have power. They are responsible for the song “Cruel Summer” by “Taylor Swift,” anyway. Anyways is jacking it good? Well I think its good for me but I would say probably 99% of jackers arent doing it right. Its not much different than insulting someone for liking bad music anyway. And I know what youre thinking, I like some nu metal. Well… Its not my favorite and eh its pretty cool and unique. Yeah I got a bone to pick with you jackers in the world. Well I saw a decent poan video but hmm.. It wasnt that useful as it didnt show any new SPs and the dialogue was cliche and if it was more HD it would have less fans.

People keep saying theres racism. Well I had not much racism experience in real life. Well I guess Im too handsome so BOOM… Sure a black guy who I was kinda friends with asked me if I ate dogs, but I didnt even know what that meant and I said yes. I think he is the same guy who has been hunting for me in the hallways during the last year of high school in lunch but if it was him, I didnt recognize him but he said we used to be friends so it might be him and I think I heard some guy call him by the name of which belongs to the person I think he is but it was quiet and vague sounding utterance so I couldnt really be sure. I guess he really wants to be my friend but eh I wasnt interested in being friends with really anybody unless they seemed extremely cool. Anyways look at all the Caucasians insulting Asians on internet… They arent knowledgeable enough gamers. They were making Euroshmups for decades… Sure its mainly Japan making the good ones and not other Asian countries.. Welp you know Indonesia has a progressive rock album from the 1970s thats better than the best of many other countries anyway. And theres only 2 pages of progressive rock albums from Indonesia on Rateyourmusic anyhoo. Well… Anyways some people are against the Vietnam War and some for it. Couldnt really care whatever way you stand. If the Vietnam War never happened I wouldnt have been born anyway. So if you hated someone for supporting the war, they might have a better point than you think. Anyways I got a 6.5 inch wiener. I feel like thats the most oppressed non micro size anyway though. And also the most forgotten size too. Well.. Who really cares… Yeah you know I think some teachers I had had the hots for me anyway especially one tutor who paid lots of attention to me, I think she was Eastern European. That was 2nd grade. And chapter 3 of Laurence of India is going to talk about the “Most people are pedophiles” theory. Its December 4 2025 anyway. Its 5:34 PM. Yeah I think that most people are probably secretly pedophiles. Seems very likely to me… Well dont think Im getting angry at these people for being pedophiles anyway. Well male pedophiles should STOP. Female pedophiles, well ok but eh most of them are just gonna give you a bad first experience probably because they arent really that great in any way shape or form so we shouldnt encourage them. Im most likely NOT ONE… Because I am not really sexually attracted to many humans in general. Neither animals or aliens… Nor objects nor colors. Nor anything else… I dont think a song ever gave me an erection. Actually maybe one did a few days ago. Yeah… Not saying which but you can look at my Albumoftheyear and guess, and obviously it was sung by a girl. Ive seen the Scorpions album cover “Virgin Killer” years ago and I didnt get an erection. So boom… I am no pedophile. Only reason I looked at that album cover was to see what was so bad about it. You people are probably afraid to learn that you yourself are a pedophile. Heh… Humanity is a stepping stone. Anyways the object show community is attracted to cartoon objects with smiling faces very simply drawn. I dont know how you can jack to that anyway. Seems like it would be too difficult. Also I really doubt that object show characters are really well written characters because they claim to be attracted mostly emotionally. Well lets just ignore them because its low hanging fruit… Anyways I have 3 followers on Twitter/X now. It seems like you have to be some fanboy of something to get a bunch of followers. Scaruffi only has 3906 followers though he doesnt post that much interesting stuff compared to what he puts on his website (His music reviews, and to a lesser extent his political articles). This semi pedestrian gamer “Rock solid” has almost 200k followers and he is just a typical gamer with above-average tastes and flirts with the idea of being a hardcore gamer with a meme of a wojak liking games like Ghosts N Goblins and other stereotypical “hard games,” and he has some political opinions that arent that original. So yeah just be a conformist that works hard on saying things that people are familiar with and like already and you get 200k followers. Tony Zaret has 40k followers on Twitter. Yet his latest YouTube video “The game that makes you DEAD” only has 6k views and its been up for over a month. He used to post short videos on his Twitter account that were significantly less funny and simpler than his actual YouTube long videos. I think that video with 6k views is pretty funny but not his most funny. The video “Only ANIMATION is CINEMA” was mostly funny because of the scene where he went to a petting zoo and filmed himself there and there were families there and he only went there just to fulfill a useless point of the plot. The children were shouting. Im waiting patiently for the next video. I thought his 2023 videos were mostly not that funny compared to his 2022 videos back when it was 2023. But I think his 2025 videos are very funny for the most part. Not really a fan of the Kurtis Conner parody because it was too simple of a video and didnt have that many jokes.

Speaking of pedophiles, wanna hear a jailbait song for you tokey toke nuggets… Or should I say Nugents…

I am a patient boy

I wait, I wait, I wait, I wait

My time, water down a drain

Everybody's moving

Everybody's moving

Everybody's moving, moving, moving, moving

Please don't leave me to remain

In the LEGO store

I don't want the new set

I cannot use it

I don't want the new set

I won't live by it

Sitting outside of town

Everybody's always down

Tell me why?

Because they can't get it up

Come on and get up

Come on and get up

But I don't sit idly by

I'm planning a big surprise

I'm gonna fight for what I wanna be

And I won't make the same mistakes ('cause I know)

Because I know how much time that wastes (and function)

Function is the key

To the LEGO store

I don't want the new set

I cannot use it

I don't want the new set

I won't live by it

Sitting inside of mall town

Everybody's always down

Tell me why?

Because they can't get it up

Come on and get up

Up from the LEGO store

Sitting in the LEGO store (ah)

Sitting in the LEGO store (ah)

Sitting in the LEGO store (ah)

Sitting in the LEGO store (tell me why)

Because they can't get it up

Yeah jack off to that song… You jailbait people… Anyways I can jack it to a hypothetical 16 or 17 year old if in the storyline in my head we are close cause Im 18. But theres no point. Yeah I age down the ladies I jack it to in the story in my head. Because Im not really a fan of the concept of MILFs. Another concept I dont like is multiverses. The problem with MILFs are that theyre kinda hoors and probably are too interested in the banging than you. Plus they wouldnt get my joaks anyway. Im practically older than them anyway too. But not really a fan of the concept of hoors because they are kinda liking an activity that isnt even that great gameplay wise. And I know some hardcore gamers hate the term “gameplay.” And yes sex is a game pretty much. I know what youre thinking, well its more about the visuals and emotional delivery. Well what emotional delivery are you gonna get from a MILF anyway? They arent gonna make you that happy. You know in all those p*** videos they never make the MILF get in with the boy by a loving way. Fine you can make it work with your imagination and I have, but its just better if youre around the same age. Too much stupid fetishistic dialogue with MILF… Its no good. Plus most MILFs people find attractive, you could easily pretend are 18-25. So yeah… The MILF concept is kinda dumb because theyre too inapprorpiate and evil, some would say demonic. Using your imagination, youre putting a demon in a good persons skin. Because in all the MILF videos, theyre demonic looking. Everybody is demonic looking these days. Every race… Tribal hunter gatherer people are an obvious exception. Going on Twitter/X, its so horrible seeing these people who look like demons. I feel like killing NPCs in Saints Row 2 doesnt relieve you. The NPCs in that game look like heroes and refugees and benevolent dictators compared to the god damn people on Twitter/X For You page. I guess you just make your playable character a goddamn demon and get killed by the police after killing the most demonic looking NPCs (or kill the most heroic looking ones, but that would be too tragic and wouldnt make you feel better, but its more realistic). But thats kinda like how Sonic fans who are attracted to Sonic feel when they play as their lover who is Sonic. But only its hatred instead of love (or lust). Hmm… Well that Sonic tangent was Matthewmatosis’s observation in his Sonic Dreams Collection video which is age restricted if you dont believe the video exists because YouTube AI thought you were a kid. Well that happened to one of my channels probably because I had a Minecraft profile picture and made GoAnimate videos. But GoAnimate is a fine software, its just used by idiots. And theres snobs in the GoAnimate community too yet they dont make good videos. I never talked to them anyway or spent much time looking at what they had to say. Also theres a 30 or so year old guy making sitcoms in GoAnimate that are like “Modern Family,” with some romantic plots and wedding episodes. I found it somehow. But cant find it now. Well it wasnt that good even though he got a degree in screenwriting. But I barely watched it. Well my GoAnimate videos were just modern Seinfeld with violence and swears. Not that much like Always Sunny in Philadelphia because the characters were more on the morality side of Seinfeld characters. But eh it wasnt that good. But I had a character named The Punk Teacher. Well I made fun of punks back in those days as a progger, though never hated punk music that much, just didnt listen to it much. Well today I listened to the song Reuters by Wire at least 5 times. But its a short song. So that guy was a wuss and he taught an engineering class and his first lesson involved coming up ways for “launching scatter poo” which he wanted them to do for his plans to start a punk revolution. Im not that much a fan of punks anyway. Also I made fun of people for having bad prose on their Reddit posts about self improvement. I dont have good prose here that much so am I a hypocrite?! Actually looking back ay what I wrote, eh not that bad and its interesting, thats what matters. I’ll be more artistic in Laurence of India and the 3rd chapter is being worked on anyway. Its 3:03 AM already. I am abstaining from m-bation for now for multiple reasons. More time for me. And also the tissue box has no tissues but I guess I can use toilet paper and hide it behind an amp. Well this is dumb… But it’ll work anyway. I thought there was a pencil behind my amp when I was looking at it to see if it was a good hiding place. But thats just the damn cable. I wondered why I would hide a pencil there. Well I didnt. Nathan For You I’ve been watching some stuff to remember and see some funny stuff. Very funny show… How come people arent that funny if this show is so popular? I watched the Uber driver sabotage. Very funny plan. Yeah I dont know why people arent that funny. But eh dont get me wrong I have some criticisms of the show like acting pathetic such as in the case of asking for a girl to say “I love you” over and over again, its too easy to be in with a hairstyle. Its too easy to go with the flow. Its harder to sit when everyone else is standing. Which I did by the way in 9th grade, didnt want to play beach ball passing with the people in my class. Neither did Carlos after a while of being peer pressured into doing it. Also how come the r/selfimprovement has only 1 post talking about the book Prometheus Rising in over a decade of existence? I skimmed the book, seems funny and more helpful than some damn CORPORATE SLACKY giving advice or advice from some guy thousands of years ago, no offense to them. But they arent rockers… I think the Buffalo Springfield second album is Illuminati themed. “Is it strange I should change I don't know why don't you ask her” from Mr. Soul is about being a changeling and maybe changing yourself to get a girlfriend, probably encouraging people to be hippies to motivate people to write anti-hippie music or just get a civil war happening so the kids dont have to go to school. I dont know how bad school was then. It probably wasnt as degrading as school is today trying hard to be “fun,” making you read some crappy young adult story just cause its fun supposedly… Well thats not the best example because it was in the Special Ed English class which I only was in for 12th grade. Im glad they put me in Special Ed, maybe its the Illuminati saving my ass from having to do the humiliating crap. But I dont know if school is Illuminati or what. But eh reading a young adult story was boring. Dont even remember what it is. And we read Anthem by Ayn Rand too. The kids there didnt really get it. Is the Illuminati saving their asses? Well they must be saving 4 other people who I approved of. Though one of those people had annoying friends. And the other one never said a word, at least I said something sometimes. And his hoodies were weird with one of a lady in a sexual pose. I dont know if hes a feminist or the opposite. Or something… But eh he seemed like a good fellow. The other two I already talked about and dont have much more to say, classical music fan and guy who sits on the floor and I think I remember him laughing sometimes. Well heres a story about the classical music fan. We had to pick a damn song to analyze the lyrics. I didnt feel like choosing one so the damn psychologist picked one for me. At least she didnt pick a modern country song like she always has playing on the radio. Picked Twisted Sister We’re Not Gonna Take It and we wrote a very simple analysis that was very short. Well the classical music fan chose a classical piece with no lyrics. And well thats sticking it to the man. Well, woman because the teacher was a woman. Some other teacher came in and asked him what song he was choosing and he said “Piano Concerto No. ? by Lizst,” She asked if Liszt was the name of a band. Come on he said Piano Concerto… These are our educators… Isnt that obviously the name of a classical piece. Dont know how he analyzed the song. Well he probably talked about the emotion that it has. And maybe talked about the key that it is in and what the emotions the key is typically associated with. So is the Illuminati really protecting us? I think it might be so. Oh yeah and another guy I approve of, forgot about him. First saw him in gym class and he was friendly and played tennis with me and a fellow Vietnamese kid. Yeah that Vietnamese guy and I had a weird relationship. Eh he wanted to be my best friend back in summer camp. Oh yeah and theres an even cooler Vietnamese guy that I used to know. Hes actually quite funny acting like mentally challenged in front of some higher grade people asking them if they like Minecraft in a dumb voice and also mispronouncing the name of a science teacher I disliked and he didnt even have her for science so he didnt even insult her because she hated her. People accused that teacher of being sexist biased towards girls in favor of them. And called a black girl Valerie “Val,” I dont know if she wanted that. She seemed cool. That was 6th grade. I dont know where all the cool people have gone in the last 2 years of high school for me. Fine, there were some cool people. I saw some Spanish kid playing DOOM on the computer, I guess it was his first time and he played some random episode and didnt know how to open a door, well it was an eye door. He wasted all his ammo. Well then he played the first episode and screamed when he saw a dead marine on the ground. And then he learned how to open doors by pressing space. That was in finance class in 12th grade. Well he wasnt that smart though and used ChatGPT for assignments where it obviously wouldnt work because you had to read an article that ChatGPT doesnt have access to. Also we had to play some browser games relating to finance in a vague way. And he still tried to get ChatGPT to answer how the game is an analogy to financial concepts. He had a friend who was also Spanish and he seemed to be smarter. He also played Minecraft on there. His friend explained to some girl who were asking how he played Minecraft on the desktop by saying he went onto some weird website after the Minecraft player ignored her. But eh I wouldnt say they were that cool. Maybe they said some cool stuff. And well there were some guys who were chuckling all the time. Were they cool, I dont know. But one of them asked how many Reddit accounts the teacher had because she kept talking about Reddit and she even called her husband a big Redditor. Pretty absurd… Fine I guess they werent that bad. In Jewelry class which I quit after quarter 1 I dont even remember signing up for but maybe I did, there were some Hispanic and Black people sitting with me. Well they were cool enough and Souls game fans. One who was Hispanic said they pirated Elden Ring but didnt like it but they barely played it, not even for 10 minutes but they like Souls games in general. And the other guy who is black said the game gets better on repeat playthroughs. They liked me though I never said anything to them. They talked about moral dilemmas with a girl who was Hispanic and said her mother gave her a weird name. She was in an abusive relationship with some guy apparently. And they were telling her “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me,” and the Hispanic guy who had a profile picture of a Naruto character was complaining about girls, though he seemed to be friends with some girl that was only here the first day. He said “Are you speedrunning?” to her. Oh yeah and the Danganronpa fan who does drugs and hangs around people asking them to give BJs was sitting at the table that day too. Her name kinda sounds like a popular cartoon character who is smart. But anyways she is kinda not cool. In 10th grade science class some guy was sitting at my table where I sat alone to get away from those people including that girl because they ticked him off. But that was only for one day and at the end. And yeah she was talking about drugs and BJs in 10th grade English class. I think that was the same day the Queen died and I laughed alongside some other kid who sat near me but I didnt know him. He had a runny nose one day and I did too then I grabbed a tissue from the tissue box behind us and he didnt realize it was there and I guess he waited a while to get one from there. Well fine there are some decent people in school I guess. But too many damn degenerates… Probably 80% degenerate 20% good. But eh I feel like school is just a damn Trill bite, its not like me now and memories of some other person. Though maybe not that different. But eh I used to write stories then and they sucked and were too focused on plot. Im much better at writing stories now. Funnily enough the funniest stories I wrote in that time period were low effort purposefully bad Pawn Stars “fanfiction.”

Pawn stars sex: The rise and downfall of rick harrison is a sexy story about rick harrison getting penis enlargement pills, killing his wife, having sex with the first lady, starting a terrorist group, and nuking america.

Chapter 1, The Beginnings

Rick harrison says "Man i wish i had a big wiener." His son corey says "Me too dad." Rick harrison says "Well corey lets open up the pawn shop." Corey says "Alright." Then a cool looking guy with twirly looking moustache and tall top hat says "Hello i am Tim and i'd like to sell you an item." Rick says "Whats the item." Tim says "Wiener enlargment pills!! Theyre real." Rick says "Holy Crap!! How much?" Tim says "2 grand." Rick says "Deal." Old Man Harrison says "Rick You absolute idiot. Thats a bad deal. Hes lying." Rick says "With a big wiener, I could do anything." Old Man Harrison says "No you couldnt." Rick says "I will prove you wrong!!!" Rick does paperwork with tim to buy the pills. Rick consumes the pills. Old Man Harrison says "Wheres your big wiener now?" Rick says "Oh it didnt work. NOOOOO!!!" But it did work rick just needed patience. Next morning he has a foot long wiener!! Rick wakes up running to the pawn shop in a panic and takes one of the guns from the shop and goes home and kills his wife. Ricks wife says "What are you doing with the gun? Help! Help! Ahhh!" Rick says "Die!!!!" Rick shoots his wife 5 times. She is dead. Rick says "Now I can bang any girl i want now that youre dead. Mwahahaha." He goes to washington dc to seduce jill biden first lady of the usa at the white house. Rick talks to himself "Hahaha Joe biden im gonna bang your wife because i hate your political opinions!!!"

Chapter 2, The search for rick

Meanwhile at the pawn shop, corey, old man harrison and chumlee are confused as to why Rick is missing. He has never missed a day of work ever. Corey says "Wheres rick." Chumlee says "I dont know corey." Old man harrison says "Hes never late, never!" Corey says "Lets go to his house."

They go to ricks house. They see the dead body of ricks wife. Corey screams "Mom!!!! Nooo!! Who did this??" Old man harrison has the ultimate revelation. "Rick has killed his wife so he can bang any girl he wants. The wiener pills must have worked over night!" Chumlee says "Wiener pills?" Old man harrison explains the wiener pills to the guys. Corey is still upset about his mothers death. Corey yells "I am going to kill rick!!!"

Chapter 3, Rick has sex

Rick has sex with jill biden in the white house. Rick says "My wiener is very Long!!!" Jill biden says "Yes indeed." Joe biden walks in on them and says "Ahhhh!!! What are you doing!!! This cant be real!!!" Rick says "Yes it is real. This is for raising taxes!!! I hate taxes!!!!!" Joe biden cries "Why my sweet jill, why would you cheat on me. Why, why why, I do not understand, i have always treated with you with respect and love." Jill says "His wiener is a foot long." Joe biden is surprised "Wow really? I didnt even know that was possible." Joe shoots his wife to death then he leaves the white house. He proposes a bill to make a TORTURE legal!!! He will torture Rick harrison for banging his wife. Joe laughs "My plan is brilliant, mwahahahaha."

Chapter 4, The bill passes

Joe biden gets his bill turned into a law. Torture is now legal. Joe biden spends the government funds on an extreme torture chamber. The pain from the chamber is Very Painful!!! So painful you'd wish you were never born, so painful you'd hate your parents for birthing you!! Joe biden is on tv and he says "Hello americans, torture is legal now." Corey is watching the tv at home alone. He says "Awesome. Joe biden is my lord and savior. I will go meet up with him and ask him to torture my dad." So he does. Corey says "Hi joe can you torture my dad. He killed my mom." Joe biden says "Sure whos your dad." Corey says "Rick harrison." Joe biden says "Funny. That man is the reason i made this law." Rick harrison is hiding behind a apple tree. He overhears the conversation. Rick whispers to himself "Oh yeah? You wanna torture me? Thats it!! Im making a Terrorist group called the Terrorble Terrorists!!! You will all die. Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahaa."

Chapter 5, Terror rises

In the siberian desert there is a terrorble terrorist group forming. There is so terrorble you cant even imagine the terrorble things they would do. The terrorble leader is Rick harrison who now calls himself "The Dark Overlord" The dark overlord found a bunch of guys to join his terrorist group. They are in a cave. The dark overlord says "Hello my friends. We all hate america, dont we?" The terrorists says "Yes." Rick harrison says "Then lets Nuke em!!!!" The terrorists have kidnapped scientists who are forced to make an atomic nuke strong enough to nuke a whole state. If they dont comply, the scientists family gets their heads ripped off. And the scientist is forced to eat the heads. And then he is forced to poop it out wearing a diaper that is superglued to them so they cant take it off!! These terrorists are so terrorble. After many days, the nukes are ready. The dark overlord says something evil in latin. Mwahahahahhaha. They will launch them very soon.

Chapter 6, Coreys evil bloody rampage

Corey is so upset his mother died, he grabs a knife and says "I am going to kill every bald man because they remind me of my father who is also bald." Corey kills so many bald men, not just the bald but even the balding. And even babies. Corey has descended into madness. Corey is so evil now. He is being hunted by the police.

The policeman chief gerald higgins is not enjoying coreys ideas of killing people especially babies. Gerald higgins says "Who would kill a baby? What a monster. I will kill this man or die trying!!!"

Chapter 7, The message

On tv, there is a video playing. "This is the dark overlord. You will all die in ten days. Were the terrorble terrorists. Mwahahahahahahahahhaha." Chumlee says "I know that laugh!!" Chumlee goes to the pawn shop and talks to Old man harrison. Chumlee says "Old man!! I was watching tv and we are going to be nuked by rick harrison in ten days!!!" Old man harrison says "Stop doing drugs." Chumlee says "You gotta believe me!!" After a while, the old man believes chumlee. Old man harrison says "I cannot believe it. My son is going to nuke our country in ten days!!"

Chapter 8, Corey vs higgins the showdown

Gerald higgins the police chief sees the message on tv. "Damn it, i only have ten days to kill this baby killer." Gerald spends 3 days searching for clues as to who the baby killer is and where he is. Then he gives up. And watches pawn stars. Then he sees corey on tv. Gerald gasps "This is the man. The man who fits the description of the baby and bald person killer!!" He finds out coreys address and breaks the door open.

Corey says "Higgins, i have been expecting you." Joe biden says "Me too." Higgins says "Mr president, what a wonderful honor to meet you!" Joe biden says "Eat my rocket." He grabs a rocket launcher and shoots Gerald higgins. But higgins is saved. A noble man grabs him quickly and throws him away from the rocket. This noble man is Old man harrison. Old man harrison says "Corey my grandson, you baby killing bastard. Why!?" Corey says "Rick is why!" Old man harrison says "You are no better than your father, the man who is killing us all in seven days!!!" Joe biden says "You mean rick is the terrorist who is going to kill us all?" Old man harrison says "Yes, we need to stop him." Joe biden says "Obviously but we have no idea where these terrorists are located. We will all die in seven days because we cant find them" Old man harrison says "No we wont, we got higgins. The smartest detective ever." Higgins gets up from the floor and says "Damn right i am. Hello richard, its been how long?" Old man harrison says "Its been 20 years, pal. Nice to see you." Higgins says "You too. And anyways i will find the dark overlord." Joe biden says "Great finally we are saved!" Higgins says "We? Its not you. Its me. And old man harrison. And not the baby killer either!" Higgins shoots joe biden and corey they are dead.

Chapter 9, The battle of the desert

Its one day until america gets nuked. Higgins finally cracked the clues and found out where rick and the terrorble terrorists are located. Higgins says "Yes!!" He calls old man harrison. They are going to fly to the siberian desert. Old man harrison says "We will never make it on time!! He will nuke america before we reach him!!" Higgins says "Believe in me, mr harrison, you gotta believe." Old man harrison says "Alright, i believe in you."

They reach the desert with 2 hours until america is nuked. Most americans have left the country. But the poor people are gonna die. They find the cave. The dark overlord says "What have we here?" Old man harrison says "It is me your father, rick. Your actions have killed your son, they turned him into a Baby and bald person killer!!!! And now hes dead!!!" The dark overlord says "Rick is not my name anymore. I am the dark overlord." Old man harrison says "Rick. You bastard!!" Old man harrison sheathes his sword and duels The dark overlord. The dark overlord gets his leg chopped off. "Ahhhh my leg, owwwie!!!" Old man harrison and gerald higgins kill the rest of the terrorble terrorists. He and higgins destroy the nukes, and frees the scientists.

Chapter 10, the Aftermath

Old man harrison is the new president of AMERICA!!! Gerald is the new vice president of AMERICA!!! They have put rick in a torture chamber. His balls get stabbed a lot. Its very painful. Rick says "Oww!! Stop help it hurts!" Old man harrison says "You did this to yourself, son, you should've known better than to bang the first lady and start a terrorist group." The end. The lesson of the story is not to bang the first lady and start a terrorist group and devise a plan to nuke america and wait a long time to nuke them.

I got 12 upvotes for that 4 years ago and it wasnt even that funny compared to my new stuff. Are Redditors smarter than Twitter/X users? I dont know…But Im banned from there anyway and if I made a new account Id get shadowbanned. I got better responses from people there when I trolled back in the day. The reason why this isnt that funny is because its too simple humorwise, not really any abstract concepts. But it is absurd. On a funny scale we’ll go 5.8/10 if Nick Mullen’s Year of the Dragon special is an 8/10 and Naga Tales is a 8.7/10 so far and Laurence of India is an 8.2/10 so far. Naga Tales has made me laugh very hard. Laurence of India I havent laughed too much making it. Well skimming through it again, I feel like I have laughed hard at making some parts. But Laurence of India is more about the ideas and I have a political agenda with it. Naga Tales is a Taxi Driver inspired (Loneliness and only liking one girl) story about music and musicians. I guess it also has a political agenda starting in chapter 3 which isnt released yet and I havent worked on it in weeks. I wonder if the political agenda preached in both stories are even compatible. Hmm…. Im not a political theorist.

Well I didnt abstain from jizzing. Well I couldnt sleep so I had to jizz to fall asleep. Didnt even look at a picture for a single second as visual aid. Anyways its 4:08 PM December 5 2025. People will be fans of anybody who thinks like them. I dont know, seems like these days every “controversial” figure is just saying stuff that people already thought about and agree with. Nobody sayin anything new. Pisses me off because real humanity hasnt even been tried yet. Some say real gaming hasnt even been tried yet. I never seen someone say true music hasnt been tried yet but maybe someone thinks that. Traces of real humanity have been tried…

The theory of Illuminati putting me in Special Ed to save me from more annoying assignments… Looking back on the years… Lets see… You know I had to do an online class about online safety. One of the lessons was to not fall for lies. They showed the Nathan For You pig saves goat video and the clip from the show of it being fake. Hmm… Well that was not a Special Ed class but I think they only gave that class to people with problems. Cause it was an easy and short class just to get some credits. Not that I have problems, I was BEING SAVED BY THE ILLUMINA… Well the psychiatrist laughed a little at the Nathan For You clip and I laughed too. I already saw the whole show before but that was probably 4 years before that day so I forgot a lot. Well the point is that the psychiatrist laughed at it. Are they Illuminati?! Fine this is not proof at all. Honestly I doubt the psychiatrist was Illuminati. But they were friendly. They had some weird kids in her room sometimes when I was in there. Such as some emo person or something, I dont know. And some people talking like theyre from the ghetto. She also helped a cool guy who years before got irritated by me one time because the teacher forced him to help me with math. And he thought the answer I put for one of the questions was what I thought was the answer for the question I needed help with which I had the answer left blank. Oh man, that guy never talked except for that one time. The guy sitting next to us dropped their phone once and he looked at the ground as the other guy picked it up. Or somethin like that.. Dont remember that well. Anyway there was a girl who mightve been cool. She hated a lot of her teachers. I learned the word “shrew” from her. Very good word that can be used in a poem to turn Hitler into a pro-semite.

New jew, goo goo.

Shrew jew, goo goo.

Albeit in a different way.

Isn’t he a lot like you, Hitler?

Isn’t he a lot like you?

This poem is inspired by Winter Wine by Caravan’s melody “Sail scene, sea green” which the first two lines has the same melody. “Albeit in a different way” doesnt have a melody. The last two lines is similar to “I’m gonna be like you, Dad. I’m gonna be a lot like you,” from Cat’s in the Cradle by Harry Chapin. The meaning of the poem is that a baby jew who is new to the world says “Goo goo” which is commonly associated with the full phrase “Goo goo, ga ga.” Shrew jew, for the purpose of the poem let’s pretend the word shrew just means old person and isn’t gendered. They also say “goo goo” because they like to make love. So they also say “goo goo” as the grow up with a different meaning. And well the jew is similar to Hitler because they were a baby too (Hitler liked babies) and maybe Hitler likes sex or jacking it. Hmm… Well this poem would be better for a new antisemite who is more of a fan of sexual intercourse or jacking it.

That was going to be put in a story of mine but never got to the part where they talked to Hitler. Would that have been one of the best and most beautiful moments in literature? Who knows?

One wonders if people would feel traumatized after being raped by someone who they know hates sexual intercourse and also has never been sexually or romantically attracted to any creature, object, color, sound, or other. Would they? It would just be petty revenge and go on the subreddit r/pettyrevenge. And I am saying they are not attracted to ANYONE. Apparently rapists rape people they arent attracted to. This hypothetical person is not attracted to ANYTHING. And the only reason theyre raping is because their favorite song is “Never Let Go” by Camel and theyre part of a self-made religion called Camelia. You know I once wanted to start a religion called Thirdeyeblindism, well fine I didnt get far enough to come up with a name. I just liked the song Jumper and the song after it on the album. But the rest of the songs arent that good so I scrapped the religion idea. And dont get the wrong idea, I wouldnt follow such a religion. But I would make the religion for other people. Alright, I realize that petty revenge isnt really that accurate. Cause I guess there is physical pressure. Also dont think Im insulting the song “Never Let Go” by Camel. Its great. But how come people like Andrew Tate dont use that song as an anthem? They would agree with the lyrics. Plus its actually a good song. I guess they dont know good music. Well he fucked up his business by not using that song. Alright just now listened to Andrew Tates suicide song. Pretty funny song… I swear I wasnt inspired by it for Naga Tales cause this guy is saying he wanted to write a suicide note. Well only listened to the first half. It probably is just the same. Well different lyrics I guess but eh they probably put the funniest lyrics at the beginning and get lazy later. I dont know.. Well its not that good of a song. But its funny. Hmm… Maybe he doesnt need Never Let Go. FUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!! Fine he does. Nobody is gonna be motivated by a song saying he wanted to write a suicide note back in the day. No offense. Anyways sorry if Im offending with the rape stuff. This isnt an attempt at being funny but a philosophical inquiry. Not even the Camel stuff is a joke, more of an attempt at connecting ideas for a hypothetical scenario that is believable. I wasnt laughing while writing this. Well heres something even more weird. What if this guy had a botched… Lets not say the whole thing, too gory. But his peen feels pain when he bangs. Ok?! Would you be traumatized if such person, and with all the previous lore given to you, raped you if you were NOT a virgin. Because I understand the value of virginity. And I know what youre thinking, what if they raped me and put it up my anus. Well… That would be horrible for me because Im not gay and also that would probably hurt. But were talking about straight stuff. If I was the victim in the scenario, the equivalent rapist would be a woman. Also in this hypothetical scenario, the rapist is not particularly attractive like most people. And in the hypothetical scenario, the rape does not cause pain, and causes a little bit of pleasure but not really. So the point here is that being a sex fan makes you more evil because you wouldnt care if a person with all those properties raped you but you would care if they had the same properties except for the fact that they are a sex fan. Hmm… So is it bad to be a sex fan? Yes it is… I know Im not a hero… BUT I HOPE THAT IM NOT DAMNED!!!!!!!!!!! But the song “Never Let Go” has a part that seems like it is supposed to represent an orgasm. Oh yeah orgasms, well he didnt jizz in you. And no precum either. Also people like to insult people calling them “precum babies,” seems pretty rude and youre just insulting their dad mostly. And how do you know you yourself are not a precum baby? Would your parents tell you such inappropriate stuff? And does it even mean anything as an insult? Cant find any proof of it causing birth defects. And besides I guess these people would also insult people affected by Agent Orange if they could. Seems like its left wing people using this nonsensical insult. People need to start exclusionary political movements that force you to be able to beat Braid in less than 5 hours on your first playthrough without a guide to become a member. But fine, thats not the best system because you might play the game when youre 4 and you cant do the test pure at a more developed age. So we need to make a game that is purposefully made to test your problem solving skills. Because Im sure the smart left wing people are pissed off at all these corporate idiots trying to act tough and keep on posting pointless corporate posts demoralizing people calling them “ragebait.” You know what, this could be Trumanali shit Im getting ticked off at… Damn it, is Twitter/X even have humans on it?! I used to get people following me on Letterboxd being the only person they followed just because I wrote something funny. I didnt even write that funny stuff back then. Thats how low the goddamm bar is… I got banned from Letterboxd anyway for putting my unreleased movie on there that I would start working on in 5 years at the time. Im not working on the movie because it sucks and is just violence and tricking people into getting arrested by taking their clothes off so they are publicly indecent and peeing on the president as they lie on the floor. The dialogue wasnt that great and the main protagonist talked like a robot because he is part robot so it isnt that interesting. Well theres a guy on Backloggd and Im the only person he follows. Cool… Well my Backloggd reviews are purposefully stupid talking about random stuff that has nothing to do with the game sometimes. Well its not like many people there do good game analysis anyway. Some do though. So yeah I guess I can be the only person someone follows sometimes. Pretty cool I guess. So I guess I am pretty cool to some people. Still have no idea why I have only 3 followers. Is it because I said Im 18…

It is December 7 2025 12:44 AM now I will come up with proof that real sex has not been tried yet on EARTH. Real gaming I believe has been tried, and same with real music. Real humor has been tried. Speaking of humor, Tony Zarets “AGI” video that came out yesterday is ok but didnt really do that much for me for humor. And real literature has been tried. Same with real movies. Real television. Why real sex has NOT been tried yet is because of the simple fact that 99+% of humans are just the Zhamashura effect if youre banging them. The term Zhamashura is an abstract concept that is very hard to explain. The common explanation “Half bored, half engaged” is a little disingenuous as it does not pertain to those specific values all the time. I guess a decent explanation of what it means is that you only like something for dumb reasons instead of logical reasons and you arent getting the best experience. Thats not the most accurate definition but its too abstract and Im no philosopher. But yeah you arent really getting the best. I dont know how people jack off to rule 34. Pretty much every picture there on the rule 34 website is illogical to jack to. You cant even find a decent picture ever. So if drawers cant even make a good attractive image with tools, can God’s algorithm create an attractive person?! For the most part no. And I said I thought I was one of the most handsome males, well that is true less than 10% of the time. I dont know of anybody who is attractive more than 10% of the time anyway. And the time overall that we are counting is during and above the age of 18… I looked at photos I took of myself on the Nintendo DSi at age 1-3. Yeah I was really taking pictures of myself on the Nintendo DSi at age 1… Well they looked cool. I would not call it “ATTRACTIVE.” But I looked “cool” in every single photo. But thats an unrelated tangent. Well the point is that sexual attraction is full of Zhamashura. Anyways I am not going to give you answers to who is the most attractive. Only true logic boys will know. And dont think that the term “logic boy” is excluding female people… It just is a cooler word than logic people or logic boys and girls. No offense. But the word “boy” is one of the most beautiful words in the English language. Same with “game,” and that is not just because I like games. So the Game Boy, now that is a beautiful console name though the effect has been lost, but the first time I ever heard of that console when my mother told me she used to have one, I was amazed by the beauty of those two words. But that does not mean that a girl will lose beauty if I look at her too much. Because they can just change some properties. Anyways people are complaining about “Looks are all that matters” in this world. Well that might be true but the goddamn Zhama corrupted idiots keep on liking stupid things that are illogical to like so idiotic things are the most popular. Humanity is a farce… Well I guess Im ticked off because I got a damn headache. I think I cured it to a degree just by pressing on MY EYEBALL. I didnt. But what if I put a water bottle on my eye, well its not even that cold anymore. Well the fact that we even have headaches… ITS A DAMN LUNACY… Headaches gone. Im gonna watch Nathan For You tonight. Tomorrow I might watch that film Close-Up which some say is similar to the finale of Nathan For You though I dont know if its supposed to be funny but eh should be interesting. Not that the finale of Nathan For You is in my top 10 episodes anyway. I guess the show Nathan For You does show the beauty of humanity. That taxi driver Andy in the Andy Vs Uber episode, very cool and funny guy. Just watch him open a bag with bad smell with no emotion and play Mambo No 5 with no emotion as the lady does a phone call. Haha… And the guy who buys the burner phones with a smile from Craigslist, haha… I gotta watch The Rehearsal as well. The first episode was great. So fine, I need to watch these shows to see the beauty of humanity again… All these demonic people on social websites are a goddamn plague. So phony, so unknowledgeable, so smug… People will bookmark my posts instead of giving me a like and comment of approval. I complimented at least ONE post for being funny. Which was a song about Proshipping Is Awesome or something like that. Very funny song melodically and tonally and lyrically too. Though its not even the guy who posted its post it was from TikTok. https://x.com/DISSOLVED__GIRL/status/1993558763702460503 There it is, I would link the original TikTok but that website sucks as a website. Also I think the album brat is the worst album ever made. Its degenerate too. Its just corporate crap pretending to be alternative. Its horrible and sounds annoying and the lyrics are degenerate. Well alright… Anyways ITS REVOLUTION TIME!!!!!! All these idiots will not go down in history. BUT SCREW IT… I’m watching “Andy Vs Uber” from Nathan For You, only watched a 5 minute and 2 minute clip of it on YouTube. Though I watched the whole episode maybe 4-5 years ago.

Its December 8 2025.. Disregard that rant from days ago… Many people are decent looking… But there is another problem. Bad names. I guess if you want NOBODY to jack off to you, just have a bad first name and DONT be an actress who plays as a character with an attractive first name… Because its damn stupid to jack off to someone if you dont know their name. And giving them a fake name, well I dont know it is just too weird. And sure it might be more respectful, as it is pretty much the equivalent of making custom LEGO minifigures by putting heads on torsos that arent theirs on legs that arent theirs with a hat or hair that isnt theirs. I dont know… I kinda try to have realistic plots in an alternate universe that is similar… Pretty much like the stories I write. Anyways time to take a shower. Its 6:19 PM.

Well yesterday I found the song “Genius Of Love,” good song and Ive been listening to Talking Heads after shunning them for years, well I stopped shunning them 2 months ago. But this is Illuminati song brah. The lyric “Clinton's musicians” An obvious reference to the president list being written with a bunch of names before the lore is even started being written, just like how my upcoming religious text “The Book of Numob,” I came up with the chapter names before even comin up with the lore which are like the Bible, the name of some kid like Luke. Heres the so far name of the chapters

Chapter 1 Numbo

Chapter 2 Keith

Chapter 3 Numbo II

Chapter 4 Solomon

Chapter 5 Suzette

Chapter 6 Numob

Chapter 7 Suzette II

Chapter 8 Keesoi

Chapter 9 Numob III

Chapter 10 Garry

But hmm, does this mean the president is related to the Illuminati? No… It just means that the Illuminati has access to the government’s lore plans. I gotta say, politics is not that good of a lore swamp. They arent getting “Lorebeards” like Elder Scrolls. Well dont think I think everything is premade. Its like Nathan For You or Curb Your Enthusaism, they have an outline and some plans for the “episode” but its unscripted dialogue. Well not every single scene is planned obviously. But there are probably some. Well dont take me too seriously. Anyways before I analyze the Illuminati lyrics of this song, let me write some lyrics I came up with for my own song called “Batto,” which musically sounds like a railroad. That is not referring to the band “Grand Funk Railroad”

Verse 1

Indonesian NIGHT… Many many WIVES…

Divorced many of THEM… Not because of the flavor of the HAM…

But because of the dissonance of the BIND. Finally gonorrhea in TIGHTS.

(“They treated me poorly, I gavem a disease I could easily cure with the injection of the fur”)

Chorus 1 (Variation 1)

Batto batto where do we go, to the motherfucking railroad of FAWK…

Train conductor Derpy Rainbowz saying some joaks from his comedy lifeboat.

Ohhhh where do we go.. To another land you know… We will train this train all the way to Swanky Connecticut, Batto!

Verse 2

Connecticutian RIGHT… Many many FOOKS…

Me and two WIVES… Only sometimes do they play with KNIVES…

And when they do IT’S ALRIGHT. Swiftly we DONKEY BONK RIGHT…

(“We need to learn a new position, STAT!”) (The word stat echoes)

Chorus 1 (Variation 2)

Batto batto where do we go, to the motherfucking railroad of FAWK…

Train conductor Derpy Rainbowz saying some joaks from his comedy lifeboat.

Ohhhh where do we go.. To another land you know… We will train this train all the way to Illuminati Jersey, Batto!

Verse 3

Born down in the chambers here, this is where I became a dear to old ladies and middle aged ones too.

Doodilak, and doodle doo.

Bruce Springsteen with the swanky jeans and the book report that was very obscene, told me a couple things.

Told me a COUPLE A THINGS NOW!!!!

Chorus 2

Batto we go to the land of freaking ghosts freaking ghosts in the subzero.

Batto we BOOT, Batto we BOOT and we shoot with our goonalakigoos.

Babababababa my shoes are kinda loose!

Yeah but don’t be a silly goose… MISSY!!!!

Alright Im bored of writing these lyrics. Sorry if theyre rude. And dont think that the two wives mentioned in the song are necessarily Indonesian. The whole reason the person in Indonesia is just so he could get married to multiple wives. This is not really MY TRUE VALUES… Well sorry if the song sucks. This is just an early idea. I had better lyrics earlier but I forgot how to word it and they were philosophical so we’ll try again later.

Anyways the song “Genius of Love” refers to “natural fun” which might be referring to stilts games from Indonesia (Egrang) which is fun made out of nature materials. Why I keep talking about Indonesia is because I pay attention when people talk about Indonesia. I wouldnt do the same for Malaysia. Why? Because Malaysia does not have a cool name. Its like I said earlier, you dont want to jack off to a girl who has a bad name. No offense… I just think the name Malaysia sounds kinda… Dumb. I know what youre thinking, the end of that word is Asia. Well theres nothing unappealing with that word. Fine you know what the word Malaysia isnt even that bad (though if it was a girls name, wouldnt be interested UNLESS they were UBER COOL) But its not as cool as Indonesias name… Anyways I think this stilts game reference is Illuminati BECAUSE Illuminati likely has a weird gaming culture with niche games along with secret games that are not available to the public. Anyways I should put “Egrang FUCKING” in the song as a new position. Yeah we will unravel some new sex pisitins in the song. The band The Velvet Underground were named after a sex position book. So I am pretty much the next Velvet Underground. And I dont think they even sang about obscure sex positions or any for that matter except for “sucking on a ding dong” which some say ISNT EVEN SEX… Well that was the case in olden times… “It is one time I’m glad I’m not a man” isn’t even referring to their gender, or the fact “Of 10 parts, a man only enjoys one” Its referring to Illuminati “changeling” powers. I know what youre thinking, Bruce Springsteen looks LOGICALLY like the same person, he never looks like an entirely different person and he is an Illuminati member. Well I NEVER SAID ANYBODY HAD TO BE A CHANGELING FULL ON AND USE SUCH POWERS TO BE ILLUMINATI. Well the point is that they can change. Im not talking about full-on shapeshifting like those Minecraft mods that are probably too overpowered and just let you be any mob anyway. Those are mod showcase bait anyway, probably wouldnt be good for any survival. No offense. But I guess it could be a good programming test making such a mod. But thats an unrelated tangent. Anyway eh Tina Weymouth looks kinda different in a lot of photos and not just because of hair. But hey, thats cool ability to have. Im NOT calling them “Reptilian” or anything of that nature. Just saying THEY LOOK DIFFERENT. This is a plausible Illuminati “potion.” And I say potion because I hope they arent giving drugs or medicine, nobody wants that crap, they’ll give you side effects. Or fine some people are just born like a changeling and it has nothing to do with Illuminati. Im sure theres many people who look different a lot without purposefully doing extreme changes and arent Illuminati. Fine I just wanted to talk about “changelings.” I dont really believe the lyric is related to that, ok? But notice this “It is ONE TIME I’m glad I’m not a man” One time… Well this song does sound alien. Is this claiming that we are superior to aliens? So the interspecies (Between human and humanoid/almost humanoid alien) BANGING is liked… Well some people arent gonna like this news. And I dont like the news of goddamn humans being the most superior in the universe. But perhaps the only aliens that the Illuminati knows are inferior to us. Well that makes sense and I would assume that would be the case. Why would a more intelligent species be kept a secret? This song references Bob Marley, a man who has been insulted by certain proggers for being a part of a music genre that is too restrictive. My 10th grade English teacher complimented Bob Marley, but she was overacting her liking and she was only complimenting it because a female student said they listened to him. But I am not saying the song is Bob Marley FALSE VALOR. Well I dont really have anything to connect this to the Illuminati. Though apparently he called institutions “Babylon” and insulted them. Well the Illuminati most likely DID NOT kill Bob Marley because the Illuminati are good guys, or at least try to be. The lyrics “He's so deep” could be referring to wiener size, there is proof as Tina Weymouth allegedly said David Byrne had a micropenis so seems like theres a care about such matters. Captain Beefheart says the stars are matter, we are matter, but it doesn’t matter. Thats just a quote I saw today and felt like putting in because I said the word matters. Speaking of “matters” you know the guy “Cotton Mathers” from the Salem witch trials? If you said “Cotton’s Life Mathers,” as a play on words, it would sound racist because his name is Cotton and people might think you’re calling black people cotton (Even though cotton is white, but fine the word cotton is not considered as a racial slur though it is a reference to slavery) and that you’re referencing Eminem because his last name is Mathers which might get people thinking that you think hes a better rapper than any black person. Thats a coincidence… Well the Illuminati probably has ways of making wieners bigger (and smaller). But hmm.. Does that mean David Byrne is NOT ILLUMINATI? Or is he Illuminati and purposefully made his penis a micropenis and he pulled the strings to get them to make this ILLUMINATI SONG?! Thats just devils advocate, I think the songwriters probably knew what they were doing and werent tricked. Maybe Id be more on David Byrnes side if I liked his vocals more. Hmm… Anyways it is a MYTH that shorter women have less deep VIRGINIAS anyway. Why the Mythbusters never tried to figure out the answer to that myth? Seems like one of the most important myths to figure out that can be said by a trustworthy guy with camera footage. So hmm… Illuminati probably have power to be are changeling of the dongs, changing the size even at full erection. Anyways fine this is probably rude to call a song Illuminati. Even though Illuminati is a good thing. But I guess its rude anyways. But hmm… They mention James Brown in this song. In 11th grade I heard a black girl saying James Brown name for no reason (maybe she saw his name on a computer screen, but I think she was just saying his name because she felt like saying a name that she randomly thought of and realized she doesnt know why she knows that name) and asking people if they knew who James Brown is and they didnt know. Well the REM Everybody Hurts loving teacher didnt say anything. Well is this related? Maybe knowing who James Brown is, is one of the passages to becoming an Illuminati. But hmm. Theres that damn song “Please, Please, Please” by Sapeena Fartener (From now on, I dont want to say a girls name properly if I dont respect her, people will start conspiracy theories about me being in love with them, it happened in 5th grade) and she stole the name of that song from James Brown. But you know what? The reason why they named their song after that was to PISS OFF fans of James Brown and also PISS OFF their own fans when the James Brown song comes up when they search for it. Anyways yesterday I watched episode 2 of The Rehearsal. I watched the first episode months ago. Well seems like the show is gonna have an ongoing story. Well thats fine… Whats my opinion on Gaming?! Well Im not as into it as I used to be. Matthewmatosis often says because people keep asking him if he ever stopped being interested in games that he was sure that we all had times where we werent as into it. Well that was not true for me until now.

My family is quite annoying. But my mother did teach me how to read at 1 and a half apparently. This is quite weird because doesnt seem like she would have done that. My younger brother isnt that good at reading. Well… Like I wrote in Laurence of India, fictional Bruce Springsteen said that parents are raising the non-nepotism future Illuminati, though in the dream world the Illuminati would be raising the children… But anyways the narrator says that the children raise themself. Well I guess they both work together. Well its bad… We need the Illuminati to raise the children. These damn teachers arent good at teaching. They arent funny or weird enough to engage you. Sadly the two most interesting teachers I had were male history teachers. One was a boomer going on tangents about rock music because history is often referenced by rock music. One was a gen X who I saw a girl say they hated even though hes funnier than most stand up comedians. He even told some person that Im the only person who got one of his joaks. But that person he told, was an arse who helped LEAD ME TO GETTING PUT IN A DAMN MENTAL HOSPITAL. But maybe that was just for life experience. Well that history teacher gave me special treatment and didnt make me write notes because he knew I was listening. Haha. Is this Illuminati saving me? Haha… But why is my parents annoying?! Well seems like theyre gonna argue all the time. Well they dont argue much but eh seems like something could go wrong a lot. My brother keeps laughing at stuff that isnt even funny near me when Im trying to be on the computer. My cousins go here sometimes and they keep on “ragebaiting” my brother because hes mean and easy tempered but its too loud and Im trying to do something on the computer. Well I guess Ill watch some Nathan For You episode I forgot what happened in, hopefully my mom wont barge in here and check repeatedly. Its annoying and they keep on spreading lies about how staying up late makes you skinny, its the damn opposite. Besides the amount of time Im awake is 16 hours at most. On that damn medication I only was awake for 10 hours a day. Doctors and psychiatrists specifically NEED TO BE DEFEATED… Probably by making them fall in love with you and cuckolding them (But dont bang the female doctor good in the first place, but if youre anything like me youll probably NOT get an erection (Or a non full one) while looking at them because like Scaruffi says about music, you dont like that much of it if you listened to a lot. And Im not saying I looked at porn a lot. The face is the part that gives you the erection easiest anyway. And you’ll say you “looked at more female people than me” but heres the question, would you recognize patterns in a procedurally generated game?!). If that makes no sense, the two doctors who misdiagnosed me were female… Jeez… Im not sexist… But god… People masturbate to female doctor porn. I cant believe this… And yeah sorry for keep on talking about sexual stuff… I guess it makes me seem weird… Am I a logical being?! Damn it I need to watch something funny… Peace… But heres something to think about… Would the Illuminati want me as a member? Well I dont know if Id really want that life. But maybe I would. I dont know… Obviously my theories of what the Illuminati are like are unlikely to be full on accurate. Its fun to come up with lore with real life. Why make fanfiction of Sonic? Just do fanfiction of real life, its a bigger world with more dissonant concepts. I used to think it was ridiculous that that easy math class with the teacher telling stories about collecting seashells that was a boring story made no sense to be on the same planet that has video games. Also sorry for breaking the rules of English with many of my sentences. But it sounds cooler so you know just do it. Im not gonna write any of this stuff because gotta focus on my stories which are more of a work of art. But I guess you want to hear what I have to say. Well I dont really have much fans. But who cares… Also my song “Batto” is pretty good so far.

Its December 9 2025 2:13 PM The song "Genius Of Love" is definitely Illuminati. The live performance of the song in "Stop Making Sense" movie even features Buffalo Springfield "Hung Upside Down" style "Beating noises” but a tamer version. The song “Hung Upside Down” is confirmed Illuminati as it has weird subject material, it is about being hung while your penis is not even pointing upwards which means not fully erect. It does not necessarily mean you are hung when fully soft, it can also mean having a slight erection because you were thinking about something cool but it was NOT PERTAINING TO THE LADIES WHO ARE HARASSING YOU. This song is about being sexually harassed by women or girls. It happened to me, in 9th grade science class, the same class with the pedophile teacher and a bunch of annoying people in general. Well the annoying student was touching my hair… Annoying person… And they called people ugly all the time… No redeeming qualities of this persons existence… Except I guess theyre an enemy which I guess action games need to have and “life is just a game.” Dont think Im condoning violence by calling life an action game, not all action games require you to be violent or even allow you to be violent (Unless you consider killing your own character as being violent hypnotizing… But Tetris is an action game and losing that game is not even violent as you dont control a living thing or robot). But why do I have to have THAT PERSON as a “fan”?! Anyways the song “Hung Upside Down” ends with a long “beating” of violence with “beating noises” as a guitar solo plays. It is NOT “sex noises,” it is VIOLENCE. Who would say “Blyat blyat blyat blyat blyat” at the end of a sex banging? It is clearly violence. Blyat is a russian swear which this song features. The word even means “whore” which seems like an accurate word to use for someone who is sexually harassing you because you’re “hung upside down.” But does that really confirm the song “Hung Upside Down” as being Illuminati? Well the verses are talking about freedom too and human progress which you need to wait for. I guess poor Illuminati members are getting sexually harassed while trying to do some business outside. Damn… But Im sure they do a lot of business in their bases now with devices.

Alright 10:26 PM of the same day. And the Genius of Love song lyric “Genius of Love” is actually referring to James Brown as the genius of love. The verse before the verse where they start calling someone the genius of love ends with James Browns name being repeated. Why would they even say a bunch of musicians names in the song? Its to build up the fact that James Brown is the genius of love. That probably means he is an Illuminati scientist who is responsible for the organization tech that allows for wiener expansion/reduction. David Byrne is rumored to have a micropenis as the rumor had been spread by Tina Weymouth. This is probably true because he reduced it on purpose and he cant defend himself due to Illuminati code.

Anyways I did say that I thought I was the most attractive ASIAN PERSON… Well lets just say the JAV videos Ive seen, I was not impressed. And I looked at a lot of them back then and even recently 2 months ago, and well it was damn not doing it for me. And you know what, theres probably some more attractive ASIAN PEOPLE in the past of history. Anyways I dont even have that good clothes so I am kinda not getting recognized for my handsomeness back when I was in school for the most part. Actually my clothes mightve been better when I was in 2nd grade and thats why that girl liked me so much. The girl Im referring to is the same one who said I was the funniest male at the table twice when a male asked the girls who was the funniest male, and I presume she thinks I am funnier than the girls at the table too. But that is not relevant. But anyways Ive seen a quite attractive ASIAN GIRL. But eh wont be jacking because THEY HAVE A BAD NAME. Fine I came up with a name that fits their face on accident when I was thinking about female names I like.

The song “Genius of Love” in the “Stop Making Sense” video and album replaces lyrics saying “Nasty fun” instead of “Natural fun,” this is NOT disproving my theory that the lyric “Natural fun” is referring to the Indonesian stilts game of Egrang or something LIKE IT… Because you can have sex while on STILTS. This may sound inappropriate but this is probably referring to “standing up wiener sucking” as the man is on a stilt and has the height to reach the mouth. So yeah this is probably an Illuminati “sex hack” (Not a fan of this term… This is barely a hack, more like a “mod that was made by reprogramming the game while inside the game” (This is referring to the fact that stilts are probably hard to make and cannot be found in nature, and this does not count animal legs that act similar to stilts, also dont think that I think that this is a genius analogy) that they are implying. They even tell people to check out James Browns music in this live version of the song. Of all the Letterboxd reviewers complimenting the movie, how many of them did? They probably got annoyed by Chris Frantz during that song while he was making joaks and also doing some “Hung Upside Down” beating noises. And yeah David Byrne has a song called “Hanging Upside Down,” I found that out while looking for a live performance of the Buffalo Springfield song. I found a video of Neil Young and Stephen Stills as old men playing it, I think it was recorded last year. But they did NOT do the beating noises part. They played it quite differently. This does not DISPROVE the fact that this is an Illuminati song. But the fact many annoying Letterboxd users like this film made me kinda reluctant to like Talking Heads. But dont think that I think that Talking Heads is in the top 20 best bands, sorry… Well even with that information Im a bigger fan than any of these fans… Sorry not sorry, I DONT GIVE A FUCK YO.. I SED IT. I SEEDED IT TOO.. Fuck that noise you ho ramblas go FAR AWAY… NOW!!! GO HOME!!!! GO HOME!!!!!!! Alright now that the varmints are gone… Lets keep on rockin in the night. Its just like my first draft lyrics of the song Batto (which is going smoothly by the way) where I get rid of all those wives that I had that I dont need because I only need 2. Well yeah… Sorry dood. But its like this yo. Theres two fundamental types of people in the world. The police and the gangster. Find the pinnacle of both, and shalalala, full body full mind… Am I right people?! I found a damn YouTube channel making sociopolitical productions called Alex Hexagon and you know how I found him? He made a review of Saints Row 2, a game that used to be my favorite when I was 15 (I always bought old games that were cheap on sale on the Xbox store) This guy made a video saying that there is 9 types of people. Just play damn Saints Row 2… Theres 2… And LOOK THERES THAT NUMBER AGAIN!!! Its like they made the first game not that good on purpose just so the second game would be the one everyone likes and gets the profound message. But this Hexagon boy likes Saints Row 1 better because its more colorful and he prefers the atmosphere. And you’ll say there’s fucking civilians in the game so there is not 2 types of people which are police and gangster. Well those civilians are either wannabe police or wannabe gangsters or the secret third person, and Lou Reed says “one type of person is fine, two types of people is pushing it, three and youre in PROGRESSIVE ROCK!” Wow… Is that profound?! Alright so you see.. Thats my logic for the defense of having 2 wives. And dont go around saying “Well you need 2 wives and 2 husbands then” No you dont, because male and female behavior are pretty much the same so just go with what you like. And you’ll say “Which is more logical to like?” Well… Who gives a fick anyway. Jeez… Stop biting me. Gosh…. Alright fine… Was I just taking the piss there?! Maybe… But I seem to be good at making connections… Fine lets not dodge the question of whats more logical to like, female or male. Hmm… Eh since the brains are the same I guess it makes more sense to like the one that is an actual fusion. And I know what youre thinking, gay males can fuse by putting the wiener in the anus. Yeah but whats gonna happen with the other guys wiener? This is not LEGO pieces where you can put one of those flat pieces with no studs on top, on top of a studded brick. Ok?! Then you’ll say “just 69 forever” Argh… I dont know if youd want to do that forever though. But well dont be offended gay people. Maybe we can genetically modify humans to have multiple sexual organs that are original and used for fusion purposes that can be used by homos and straight. And dont think Im being offensive by saying homo and straight in the same sentence. The term hetero doesnt sound as good as a shortened word. Plus that term has bad taste in my mind due to the fact that the Danganronpa fan kept on saying “no hetero” in 6th grade science class, which was just annoying to hear it very frequently as it is an attempt at being funny by twisting a memey jeebie (“no homo”) which is not even funny and making it not any funnier, maybe even worse because it is more ironic. Proof of this phenomenon is when I saw someone saying that the game Metroid Prime 4 made them feel like a video which can be described as a “Tiktok where a squirrel looking girl who is wearing a white tank top? or something like it is bobbing her head with buck tooth showing, as food appears. I think the term “hangry” is used in the caption of the video. Or some other annoying baby-like mispronunciation of a word. And theres some lady staring at her with disgust at another table” Saying that as a joke is EVEN MORE ANNOYING than being the sincere person who made this video.

My geneitcally modified human idea to make sexual intercourse more appealing to homos might be a bad idea because what I was thinking was making them have like wings that come out of some gates on the sides of your torso and they BOOM go around and circle around the front of you. Its like having a hula hoop but kinda like Baymax in his red stuff shaped arms. Yeah sorry for referencing a Disney Pixar movie if thats not intellectual enough. But just imagine his arms are a wing arm hybrid that humans have but it is skin colored anyway or maybe even flesh colored, that would be more original and also be less uncanny. You might be scared. So hmm… Well fine this is a horrid idea. Oh gosh… Its December 10 3:26 PM anyway. Still havent put the last 13300 words on my website yet. Heh… Yeah Im probably gonna do it in a few hours.

Seems like Jonathan Blow new game is being announced tomorrow at Game Awards. Didnt even realize that event was happening tomorrow until I found out today.

“Born To Run” by Bruce Springsteen makes fun of people who shorten words for no reason. “Tramps like us, baby we were born to run” the word “tramps” sounds like “trans,” and they are saying that they are going to run away for their life, not because they are transgender but because THEY SHORTEN WORDS ANNOYINGLY. Don’t get the wrong idea, I get annoyed when people shorten the word “transporter” to “trans” as well when playing Town of Salem. Medication/medicine to meds, clitoris to clit… The point is that they are just saying the damn prefix. Sure clit isnt a prefix, but they are just trying to sound cool while saying a medical term. Just say “cyclops ball” if you want to sound cool… (I am not saying its the coolest term). Laurence of India chapter 2 compares the clitoris to the eye of a cyclops. But sure it isnt really a face because the virginia is NOT in the front of the body where the bush would be. Well… You say cyclops ball does not sound cool? You can say cyclops eye. You can say pink pebble. How about we shorten the SECOND HALF of it to toris? Clit is just annoying sounding, so is the term lit as a shortening of literature. Hopefully someone can explain why these shortened terms seem so annoying. But I will just assume that the people using these terms are purposefully demoralizing people or more likely, lemmings spreading the demoralization that was caused by a potential organization or just pranksters. So yeah I am glad that Bruce Springsteen has a problem with people shortening words like this. Anyways fine you will say that doctors are our enemies and I do agree and you will use that as justification to not say the actual medical term of clitoris. The first written occurrence of the slang term “clit” is in 1958. Well that makes it clear that somebody is trying to demoralize people with that term on purpose. Words are powerful because many of them sound annoying. But eh dont get me wrong, I dont really care but I used to care much about annoying words. This is just a benign topic. But it is interesting interpretation of the song “Born To Run.” I put this in my favorite songs list, BUT NOT because of the lyrics. I just like it musically more even though I said I didnt like it that much a while ago.

The song “Time of the Season” is obviously Illuminati. It is much different from any other song on the album lyrically and musically. Plus the story says that two of the band’s members didn’t like the song. Seems like an Illuminati forced them to make it and in a specific way. That said, the Illuminati did a good job making it. But still the Zombies’ actual songs seem better. Illuminati keeps clues around as a way to have recruits anyway or to add to the lore of the world. The lyric “Tell it to me slowly” is referring to people liking slow motion and finding it gives them an erection. But it is also referring to methodical strategic masterminds who have to think slowly.

Worked on Laurence of India chapter 3, I feel good about it. Its December 12 2025 5:35 PM. Im probably gonna get much stuff put on the website after dinner. Im working on a comedy special with Rupert Pooperts. It will be available as text. I see many people acting like theyre so cool for liking E33 saying people who dont like it have no emotional capacity. Jeez… Im fed up with gamers. Too many story fans and eh my books have a better story that is more interesting and more relatable too actually and with more interesting themes. Eh I dont even know why the game is so popular. Look at the synopsis on Wikipedia, sounds like some nerd shiz…

Now heres one for Rupert whose favorite album is The Chronic by Dr. Dre. I saw a meme with Dr. Dre’s face on the left side of a line “Bitches aint shit but hos and tricks” and the right side of the meme was Schopenhauer saying something misogynistic. And the middle was a “midwit” who was respecting women. Well heres the thing. Dr. Dre’s misogynistic lyric had more interesting prose than Schopenhauer. “Bitches aint shit but hos and tricks” is a very cryptic lyric. What do they mean by tricks? Is this a reference to Trick o’ Treating? Are they suggesting that little girls tricked them during trick o’ treat because they didnt like the candy they gave them? So they hate even little girls? Thats a possible meaning. But jeez “hos and tricks” is a very interesting lyric and Residents-esque with its crypticness. Just saying… And I think Schopenhaeur has some good quotes about how being tolerable of uncontrollable noise means youre an idiot (Though I think its ok ocassionally like at Thanksgiving, there I learned my baby cousin was circumcised because he was getting diaper changed and my youngest uncle was saying “You circumcised him. Why would you do that?” and the mother was saying “His dad made him” or whatever the hay… Well that was the most psychedelic overheard conversation of Thanksgiving 2025. Thanksgiving 2023 was more psychedelic with people having attempts at being funny (Oh yeah and my mom made an attempt at being funny in 2025 Thanksgiving, I lost some respect for her because of it) and I skipped Thanksgiving 2024) Dont think that Im misogynist though. Theres really no difference between male and female in the brain anyway. Though maybe jizzing in the virginia makes girls happier with hormones absorption, some say… But seems like the results are not conclusive on that theory. So for now we can say there are no differences brainwise. Sorry if that sounded inappropriate.

So people say “Everybody is 12 theory” or whatever. Yeah these guys never listened to Syd Barrett’s Pink Floyd which he was purposefully trying to be childlike and they would never insult someone for acting childlike again (Unless its in the lame way like liking a corporate kids show that isnt good). Brian Wilson unreleased Beach Boys album named “Adult/Child” has a theory that you have two brains of adult and child that you can switch behind. Just saying that Brian Wilson seems more credible than whoever came up with a dumb theory like that which was probably released as a Twitter post, not the most epic place to post a revelatory theory and never elaborating on this vague theory in a book. Also I feel like some of the older Beach Boys songs are better than many of the songs on Pet Sounds. Because better vocal performances and harmonies. I’ll have to update my best songs list. The “Endless Summer” compilation and the album “The Beach Boys Today!!”and the compilation “Spirit of America” have many of the good songs.

Its Dec 12 11:57 PM didnt post all this stuff yet because I didnt have time to put the HTML paragraph markers stuff on here. Well I laughed hard at the house where we had dinner to the paragraphs I wrote today in Laurence of India. The part that made me laugh the hardest was the fact that a YouTube channel named “Mythbusters: Roblox Edition” tried to prove a myth that there was a penis sucking minigame in one of the most popular Roblox games and they couldnt find proof of it because it is only on 1 hacked server which was hacked by an Illuminati member. It is the subtext that is especially funny, just imagine a YouTube channel called “Mythbusters: Roblox Edition.” If you watched the Tony Zaret video where a character tries to make an object show and join the object show community, his portrayal of the brothers that made the real original object show called BFDI, well people like that who are too serious despite quite childish and illogical interests are pretty much who would run a channel like Mythbusters Roblox Edition and they look like it too. This is the Tony Zaret video in question https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nelgRDbnLZc And its called Mythbusters which implies there are two or more. Its like Columbine, how the hell did you get someone to agree to doing something like this?! Plus there are so many different games on Roblox, just imagine them trying to solve a myth for a popular Roblox game that they dont like. Apparently Mike Matei hated doing a game glitches video for Banjo Tooie because he didnt even like the game and probably thought it was corny but it had glitches (More common in 3D games) so he had to do it. He probably didnt even play the first Banjo game because he didnt recognize Banjos sister Tooty (who is only in the first game) in a rom hack of The Legend of Zelda 1 NES called The Legend of Banjo or something where she is the replacement of Zelda. And yeah I didnt watch the whole stream I often just skip to the end to see what he thinks of random crap. Well I used to do that but havent watched him in months. And his “pussy” couldnt handle Vanquish’s God Hard mode and he sounded like a girl fake laughing about it saying “I don’t know,” Well dont think thats inappropriate for me to say.. Just a sex reference which is not out of the ordinary for Mike Matei who once announced to the Angry Video Game Nerd fanbase that he had doggystyle for hours and the load was huge. And he makes sex jokes a lot on stream. But yeah that joke about Mythbusters Roblox Edition is very funny and multi-layered. But is it a dumb idea to write about Roblox in a book like this? Well I think it is fair game. But yeah this might tamper its chance of being the Great American Novel, though I think it should sweeten its chances because its in with the times and is realistic to a degree. I played the game Codenames today after dinner at the house that I was at with my cousins. Well I said the word “swashbuckler” to get them to guess the two words on the board “pirate” and “washer” (Because washer has wash and er, both parts of the word swashbuckler) Well they got washer but not pirate. I swear Ive known the word swashbuckler for over a decade. But its not as common as I thought… Nobody seems to know it. Though dont think of me as some literary person. I feel like I learned it from a mobile game called Zombie Farm Battles which is a very bad freemium single player card game which is no longer available that I think had zombie pirates. Alright I looked at the google images of the game and seems like there is a card called Scallywag but not Swashbuckler. Hmm where the hell did I learn the word swashbuckler? And yeah the word swashbuckler apparently does not necessarily mean pirate. Well I just didnt know how to connect the words. But I did connect a bunch of words with bad ways too. Like “cooking” for turkey and glass (Because ovens have glass) And well I usually start with a 3 word connection. Its a fine game. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYWKaZM4IcU Anyways this review of the game Codenames is scathing. But Im sure you could “get poon” if you play it with some girls (Who are NOT related to you) and say some funny clues that actually work. But dont think Im gonna be jacking off to the idea of that. Because you cant play with 3 players. Sadly Im only massively attracted to 2 people that it is morally acceptable to jack to. Maybe if I act more crazy (But Jimi Hendrix says on one song “And stop acting so crazy” in the song “Fire,” but I recently learned from Snoop Dogg that the word “burned” is slang for STDs (“Just don't play with me, and you won't get burned”), so in this song it sounds like he is treating STDs like a bioweapon that he can spread so maybe this song isn’t the most morally guiding “Bible” of music, though the Book of Job doesn’t seem that godhearted of a story either) and suspect some people are Illuminati members, then that number of girls you can jack to morally and be happy about it could increase. Dont think that I purposefully convinced myself these two people are Illuminati members and thats why I jack.. No… Theyre famous so thats why its acceptable. Theres much worse people jacking to them anyway. Also there is an album called Kirk by Hail, the first song of that album might be about two people (1 male and 1 female) who m-bate to each other. The lyrics are not transcribed anywhere on the internet that I can find though. The girl singing seems to think that the act of jizzing is illogical and “goes too far” because it makes a mess. Funny because I did think that too about a month ago. But dont go taking medication just so you get retrograde ejaculation as a side effect, its not a good idea. Not that I took medication to give myself retrograde ejaculation as a side effect. The song is even called “Imagination,” seriously… Im not playing with you. Some of you evil people will say “Just have a cuckold play Codenames with you in the imaginary scenario” I would not do that… Thats rude. And fine they would necessarily be a cuckold. They might not even be interested in the two girls. Welp… But has a porno made this a plot? Most of them are focused around two people having sex for the first time. But the setup for them being attracted to each other is highly unrealistic or uninteresting and often makes the characters seem simple minded or “hoors,” or “boors” which is not really moralizing. Well so those board game guys insult Codenames, fair enuff but they arent really getting the big picture which is being a tool to learn about people (You learn about what they know and what they dont) and generate laughter and also it is strategic though it is true that if you look on Reddit and ask “Codenames best play” they’ll say the most strategic play you can do is reference Star Wars because they have a lot of stuff that would apply to the game’s card set, sounds too nerdy in kinda the uncool way, no offense to Star Wars but its not the most interesting science fiction (Not that Im an expert on this field… Seems like a lot of scifi talks about the same topics without going far enough with interesting ideas. Star Wars is barely science fiction too. But its space fantasy which sounds worse). But fine, I gotta try the board game Twilight Imperium which they say is the best game or one of the best. Well it would be too hard to find people to play that with. But back to the porn topic, seems like they dont make good stories at all. You might cite the many porn films that have an elaborate plot, there is one about pirates apparently. Well that doesnt sound that interesting.

Expedition 33 fans are getting angry at people. Well is it really so bad to not like JRPGs that much. Not even that much of a fan of Western RPGs. Seems like they are not the best strategic or tactical games. But eh who cares. Theres probably a load of obscure games that are very good that I dont know about that came out this year. It probably doesnt require that much tech in this time period to make a good game. But even E33 haters will hate on obscure games too, saying that the Games for Impact section of Game Awards is filled with games that seem like the type to have less than 100 reviews on Steam. Well I dont really connect with the gaming scene anyway. These so-called Indie game fans seem to be posers too only liking the most popular Indie games. I saw a guy on Backloggd with Indie in his username insult Snakebird (a puzzle game which is good) saying that it is a bad puzzle game because it only has one solution to puzzles and he cites Portal 2 as a game that is a good puzzle game (Its good but is it really the best? At least I had a good time listening to Frank Zappa’s LATHER for the first time while playing it for the first time, quite the experience, they go well together). So I guess he would like Braid’s final puzzle which has an unintended solution that you can only do if you have perfect timing. And well he seems to hate the game Snakebird because its too hard for him and the multiple solutions excuse is just to make him seem like a game design scholar. I dont think he even plays Zachtronics games which are known for being based around multiple solutions, seems like he is just coming up with an excuse. And you know what? I was right, these Indie fans are bourgeois disguised as a man of the people. “The community might also be more toxic than ever in this version... likely due to its free price tag.” Says this guy about Counter Strike 2. The game “Space Station 13” is free and the players are friendly and if they are mean, its silly (Once some chick I antagonized made me overdose on a drug in the game, I didnt die though, also the guards believed my side of the story). This asshole says Club Penguin is better than Snakebird. I played that game when I was a kid, I was excited for the games parties and was thinking “3 more nightmares until the next Club Penguin party” with nightmares referring to having to brush my teeth. Because the stuff tastes bad. I dont have a problem with that now but jesus, why do people take pictures of themselves brushing their teeth thinking its cute or sexy? Its fucking gross. Also yeah I hate the word that almost rhymes with “boothlace” (Sorry the second half of the word doesnt rhyme with the banned word in question because I cant find a good replacement word, I think I hate the -aste suffix, oh wait haste is a good one.) because that word just sounds annoying and sinister. Why so many songs say “boothhaste” is damn annoying. One song from the Byrds Fifth Dimension album, the first song of Beach Boys Surfs Up. Isnt it weird? These are two rock bands with vocal harmonies that originate from California. Is this a coincidence? Oh gosh…. But Club Penguin, not that good of a game. The minigames of CardJitsu are pretty much rock paper scissors. Though the water cardjitsu game is more about quick button presses. The snow cardjitsu game is the most tactical and was my favorite when I was a kid, but probably is worse than thousands of tactics games, plus he probably stopped playing the game when that came out. Well fine maybe the surfing minigame was decent. But back to insult Mr. Indie Bourgeois, he calls Celeste the most cerebral 2D platformer. Come on dude, it doesnt even have enemies. And what about puzzle platformers such as Braid and I havent played them but Elec Head or the new one by the guy named something like OOO? Wouldnt those be more cerebral? And guess what about this guy. His damn Twitch account has him complaining that the username that he wants was already taken so he added an S to the end and he has his username as what he wants it to be on Backloggd. Just make an original name, jeez… Its not that hard. I once had a dream that the name Plootonius Brown was already taken by some Southeast Asian artist. I believed it to be true during the dream and couldnt come up with an original name that sounded good during the dream. And dont think that the name Plootonius is a misspelling of Plutonius. Its a subliminal message telling you to loot. Haha… Alright it isnt, but nobody wants to be named Plutonius because some guy would think that youre referencing Fallout Tactics. Plus Plooto seems cooler anyway. But lets not talk about this, its boring. Alright I guess Ill watch The Rehearsal season 1 episode 3. I was watching Nathan For You clips on YouTube and found a clip from episode 3 of season 1, though didnt watch it. But it seems like the episode will show more weird people in the wild. Thats really what we want to see. I was thinking from the Wikipedia synopsis that the rest of the show would be indoors Nathan with a bunch of random kids and this Christian lady. But I did see a criticism of Nathan Fielder who said he lied about season 2 of The Rehearsal about a pilot who did a great recovery listening to Evanescence's Bring Me to Life while he did the landing saying the pilot mentioned the band more than any other in a text he wrote. Well I dont think Bring Me to Life is that funny of a song. So if that song is the punchline to an episode, I dont know if it will be that funny. He used the song Mambo No. 5 as a punchline in the Uber episode of Nathan for You, that worked really well for me. I doubt I would laugh that much to the song Bring Me to Life. I once saw some Robloxian singing nu metal songs. It didnt make me laugh. And yeah I was there to troll, probably didnt do that good of a job. But once I did pretend to be a wannabe gangster whose favorite music is Beethoven and some cloud rap fan got confused and he left the server when I said I wanted to get revenge and kill people when I grow up and become a gangster. But thats not that funny. The funniest stuff was obviously when I did DarkSydePhil soundboard trolling. Even made some antagonistic and edgy person laugh when DarkSydePhil said “I’m human!” And yeah pissed off both left and right sides of a political debate which was just them stating statistics about certain races back and forth, I think I talked about this already. Man I made some girl very mad and she was accusing me of being antagonistic and DarkSydePhil said something like “Show evidence of what you’re saying” I dont remember the exact voice clip but it was a longer voice clip maybe 12-20 seconds. Oh yeah and people were treating me like a pet because DarkSydePhil was laughing at some guy who had a really big hot air balloon sized avatar somehow and people were thinking Im some wholesome guy who was a weird laugh. Because when he finishes one of the laugh voice clips I have, he goes “awk awk awk awk awk” in a much deeper voice than the main laugh was. And some memey jeebie “Aryan” dressed up guy and the girl he probably wants as his girlfriend who is the same type of memey jeebie. Well DarkSydePhil was being antagonistic to them. And well the guy thought I was funny but the girl didnt. This probably caused some schisms. But hey, he could find a better girl. And many times DarkSydePhil said something like this “This game sucks. The only reason why people play it is because it’s free,” yeah I think that pissed some people off. Well I think I might put the voiceclips I have available on Google Drive. Also my mom just barged in but I swiftly turned the iPad off and lied down. Good thing there were no headphones on currently, that would take time to take off. Yeah Ive been writing this for a while. Its 1:47 AM. Well time to watch The Rehearsal. I still have 1 hour and 13 minutes until 3 AM.

The next 3 paragraphs are probably not that interesting.

(Talking about star trek) Alright fine I dont have good criticisms of Scifi as a whole. Mostly just watched Star Trek shows. And well I guess my criticism of Star Trek is just putting random scifi concept in an episode for 2 minutes like some captain talking to you in the present from the past but its revealed at the end and shes a dead corpse. Well it didnt really have an emotional impact. Fine not the best criticism, but eh they couldve done better. And well the TNG episode about multiverses, didnt find it that interesting. Well fine I already said I dont like the concept of multiverses in an unrelated tangent a while ago. But fine Im not the best critic because I guess I like the funny episode that everybody hates which is where Data becomes a slave. Though I was thinking why doesnt he just punch the wall and escape. The movie “Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky” has the same problem (This guy is very strong) though he breaks a wall at the end and helps people (I guess its every prisoner gets to escape instead of just the ones that happened to be outside at the time, but havent seen the movie in years) escape. Also the episode Schisms from TNG, that one I remember finding very boring.

(Opinion on star wars) So theres lot of hate for Star Wars these days. Well what do I think about that? And its not helping with political commentator Hasanabi who everyone hates saying “I like KOTOR more than the actual movies” Well he didnt specify which KOTOR. So perhaps he likes the first KOTOR more than the second. If he was a much bigger fan of KOTOR 2 then he would say KOTOR 2 instead of KOTOR in general. But anyways who cares… The best star wars video game is Jedi Knight Jedi Academy. Maybe Jedi Outcast has higher highs which I did play but got stuck on maybe the second level after you finally get your lightsaber(Didnt know where to go), and thats probably when the game is at its best. Seems like there could be a good star wars board game. Well the movies are ok but not that interesting to me, even when I was 13, I didnt really pay that much attention. But I liked the games.

(Talking about the rehearsal show) Well I did watch the Rehearsal episode 3. But turns out that the rest of the season doesnt even have them doing rehearsals for random people. And this show isnt as funny as Nathan For You, but I guess it isnt trying to be.

This paragraph is partially about the first song from the album Hail by Kirk, and its called “Imagination” which seems to be about masturbation. Then the paragraph talks about a self improvement YouTuber who we are against. Well this song has the lyric “You play a game that gets all over you, that’s what you get when you take things very far” This is definitely talking about m-bating (to your Imagination, the name of the song) and going far enough to the point of jizzing which makes a mess that is illogical to want to happen. But hmm.. Jizzing seems to be illogical. But you will get blue balls if you don’t, didn’t happen the first night I tried this experiment but the second night I got it for 3-5 minutes and it didnt really bother me but I was trying to sleep but I had a feeling it would stop soon enough and it did. But I tried searching up if anybody ever jacked it without getting to the point of jizzing for their entire life. Couldnt find a post of anybody saying so. Have the semen retention people got on this as a conspiracy theory?! I think that they dont jack it at all though. You know the first time I saw their subreddit I was watching the Marx Brothers “A Night at the Opera.” Yeah I guess I was bored by the ending part. I like the Marx Brothers but prefer the Three Stooges. Duck Soup is a good film though and also has good music with weird singing that you wouldnt get today probably unless you worked hard to make it sound like that. So Nikola Tesla cites the Hindus as knowing that you cant be smart and think about sex at the same time.(Might be a simplification). But how come the Hindus religious imagery includes an upside down hand? Jacking with your hand upside down feels better. The Hamsa (upside down hand imagery of Hinduism) “provides defense against the evil eye.” There is a YouTuber named Hamza who is probably pro semen retention and his channel description just says “Self improvement,” I cant tell if this guy wants to be taken seriously or not. Hes putting memes in his videos and it just makes him look dumb and not capable of coming up with his own humor. Well I got to read the book “Promethus Rising,” it will be more interesting and stonery than this guy who Ive been against for years. But I just found an interesting topic from Hamza, “Attraction isn’t logical,” let’s see what it’s about. Alright it isn’t what I thought it was about. This guy is just talking about some guy who thinks he should date some girl because they’ve been friends for months, which is apparently supposed to be a logical argument to convince the girl to do it. Damn it, I thought this was going to be about how most people are attracted to people for illogical reasons… And the guy this guy has as his girlfriend or wife if my Google Images search showed me him a picture of him with his girlfriend or wife, well she looks like my 8th grade English teacher but without glasses. Well alright looks like he has had many girlfriends. Well none of them look that cool. No offense brah. But we won’t be listening to you… The youth of America has spoken.

I guess I should tell you what was happening at the house where we had dinner. Well people quoting memes including “6, 7” to my younger male cousin who is talking to his friend about a football video game that they were both playing it seems like. Which type of football? Probably American. Well not much to say really. But why so many people talking about “6, 7” even as a young adult? You know I was just thinking earlier about the time one of these female cousins who were saying “6, 7” to the person who my other cousin is voice chatting with, about the time she said the “N word” repeatedly to some kid her brother was voice chatting with while playing a mobile version of Counter Strike. That was maybe 6-7 years ago because I remember the kid he was voice chatting with was asking how old his sister was and they were the same age, they were 13 or 14. And damn, that was not intentional saying 6-7. Even yesterday I ate eggrolls and almost said that I ate 6 or 7 of them. Luckily I just said that I ate 7 even though I wasn’t sure. So this is pretty damn weird and I didn’t mean to start talking about these coincidences in this paragraph… Well it’s late. Maybe I should’ve wrote some Laurence of India tonight instead of this stuff. Well the fun of writing this stuff is doing research and coming up with new ideas.

Its December 13 2025 3:32 PM. Heroes are only heroes to other heroes, is this true or not? Rupert Pooperts @RupertPooperts on Twitter/X is followed by some people who don’t seem the most heroic, no offense. Fine he is no hero because he likes the brat album, he likes Roblox and not because its fun to troll people on it. Also you could watch the YouTube channel “Realm of Darkside” DarkSydePhil and LowTierGod (and more soundboards but thats the main two and the funniest two) soundboard trolling if you want to see some soundboard trolling. It gives a good glimpse of the average player of games such as Marvel Rivals, one video has some guy in the voice chat repeatedly saying “This has to be AI” in response to the soundboard, seems like he is trying to impress a girl in the voice chat who eventually says “We heard you the first time” and they get pissed off at the soundboard player because he keeps on suiciding. And theres one video where he really pisses off a Marvel Rivals player who calls him the N word and the trolling goes on for maybe 3-5 minutes and he never figures it out. DarkSydePhil saying he is going to jump of a cliff in the game because he hates the game. And that pisses this guy off a lot. I believe this https://rumble.com/v67di8j-dsp-soundboard-trolling-on-marvel-rivals.html?e9s=src_v1_ucp_a is the one where DarkSydePhil meets a guy who calls him the N word. Only on Rumble for some reason. But yeah its very funny if you like seeing these guys getting pissed off.

Here is a Gentle Giant themed sexual harassment Proclamation. I’m gonna tie you up in Knots while you Think of Me with Kindness with feelings that are So Sincere as I use my Free Hand to do one of my Aspirations ever since my Schooldays and oh my dog just came in, this is gonna be the best moment of the Dog’s Life. We’re gonna Wreck your Black Cat which is black because we bruised it, that’s the Plain Truth. We’re In A Glass House so everyone can Experience what is going on right now which we always do, it’s our Way of Life. Will you sing An Inmate’s Lullaby for me while I bang? The Power and the Glory is mine for the taking. I have been Acquiring the Taste for this. My penis is Giant. My sex ways have been described as Funny Ways. Alright let’s do it. Isn’t it Quiet and Cold? What, you feel Nothing At All? Why Not? Let’s film this with a Mobile phone. I got a lot of Time to Kill and also phone storage to fill. I’m not impressed banging you, it is Just the Same as any other one. On Reflection, this was a bad idea. Thank You for teaching me not to stay a sex offender. If only I heard some Words from the Wise beforehand, but now my time has ended and I am a sex offender. Can I hear A Cry from Everyone in the audience? Alright, thanks for coming to all you who watched, and there will be Another Show tomorrow. Make sure you have good Timing so you don’t miss it. I’m willing to do an Interview about this.

Rupert Pooperts is gonna troll an Expedition 33 fan saying it’s not as strategic as “AW2” which obviously means Advance Wars 2 but if you search “AW2 game” on Google, you’ll get Alan Wake 2. Hahahahahahaha. I really don’t think Alan Wake 2 is strategic at all so he will point that out. You’ll get Advance Wars 2 if you search up “AW2 strategy game” but he isn’t gonna do that. Hahahahahahaha. Expedition 33 fanboys and fangirls make no sense to me. I guess they’re just Indie Bourgeois people using it as an accessory, no different from the students playing music with computer hi-hats repeating while wearing AirPods and you can hear the hi-hats only. I can’t believe these gamers… Just a bunch of philistines…

https://x.com/willmenaker/status/1999888258499834080 Look at this idiot. Thinking “dark woke” is a good strategy. Here is the actual good strategy, how about BEING COOL?! Instead of being edgy, how about being COOL?! I reckon no cool person even wants to associate with either left wing or right wing. They’re both filled with highly uncool individuals. You’ll say “How about the rock musicians you like who are making political songs today” Well they’re not as cool as they used to be and it didn’t start in 2016, it started decades before that. Next paragraph is an attempt at talking about cool people. Skip it if you wish because it just ends up being talking about people from school.

This paragraph is an attempt to talk about cool people, but didnt come up with the coolest ones necessarily and too much talking about people from school so dont really mind if you sit this one out. How about “Cumtown people” Are they cool? I wouldnt call them cool. What they do is decent but not the coolest. What is cool?! Well let me think who was the coolest guy I knew in school. Well probably my 9th grade history teacher who was rambling all the time and going on unrelated tangents and also talking about rock music and he played some music on acoustic guitar sometimes. But fine, he isnt even that cool because he called on me once acting like I was one of the degenerates of the classroom. Come on, my hairstyle wasnt the best at the time. But I was not a damn degenerate of the classroom. Oh yeah and once that guys test had the answer sheet at the end of a PDF that we were supposed to write the answers on, the first half of the PDF is ABCD multiple choice spots blank, second half had the answers. That was the test I needed the most help on so what a miracle. But is my 10th grade history teacher cooler? I think not, I had his wife as a teacher before, she wasnt as cool as he and he probably doesnt like the fact that she likes a boy band and sings their hit song all the time. He insulted 90s music saying it is too whiny. But fine, the boy band she likes was from the 90s but not whiny. So is whininess the only quality he measures? Well he did once compliment my written response saying I was logical. But alright how about students, well theres the Indian guy who likes Metal Gear Solid but watches TikTok and laughs at them during Advisory. Theres the guy who was always listening to music in 9th grade history class and the girls who he probably didnt like (They called the autistic tutor a pedophile and they swore a lot. They looked older than many 30 year olds so they shouldnt even be acting like theyre a kid anyway (Thats a joak)) got angry at him telling him to turn it down. I think it was techno music from what I could hear. Oh yeah and I forgot this guy who was probably the coolest and I was his friend. Some weird guy who I played Wild Kratts with in 1st grade, he wanted to be Chris even though he looks more like Martin. And he liked Apple the company and in 5th grade he pretended to be advertising an Apple TV during recess to me (which I said was already a thing, well not an actual TV but they have something called Apple TV) And in 7th grade we sat with 2 girls at math class, 1 I liked a little bit but eh they were a memer who once sang “Chunga chunga ooo,” to me and a group of others during some day we were outside for the end of the day for some reason, probably near the end of the year and the other 1 we sat with was too phony and wants to be a psychologist. Not cool. And he sang the melody of the opening of Beethovens 5th Symphony to lyrics about going on a date with some girl who I thought was uncool though I think she asked me to sign her yearbook. Welp… So is that really the coolest person? I guess. Also he asked a nonsensical and long question to the librarian in 9th grade on purpose. Well thats the last time I saw him say anything really.

These “dark woke” people are just idiots. Plus theyre probably the same “Indie Bourgeois” gamers too. So yeah these guys are fake left wing anyway and Im not even left wing. So boom… Ownage roight? And this guy saying Gaven Goosom (This is not an insult but a name of respect because it sounds cooler) needs to be dark woke again is a damn idiot and he is saying he’ll play a Resident Evil game just because it has Leon. Is this really a genius podcaster of the left wing? Also I doubt he’d care if the new Resident Evil game had Sheva from Resident Evil 5. Boom, YOUVE BEEN ACCUSED OF BEING RACIST (to a degree)!!!! Anyways all Gavin Newsom (Sorry the compliment name potion wore off) needs to do to win is make a Van der Graaf Generator clone band, and he’ll win. That’s really what the USA needs more than anything (At least that of which that we can conceive of, and that of which that is manmade) honestly. So the question is do we keep the British accent if this band is gonna be USA based? Well yes, we need to have Peter Hammill style inflections. Also please don’t make the vocalist sound like a prog metal vocalist. Please…. Alright. But Gavin Newsom already screwed up his entire campaign by complimenting Bad Bunny’s music on Twitter, I saw it. I’m sure there’s better and less bourgeois musicians who do not make music just to get groupies to screw like Bad Bunny most likely did, from that region. The first time I heard of Bad Bunny was when I was watching Saturday Night Live years ago because the weekends had bad stuff on national television. But yeah his music was bad and I expected Riot Grrrl music with a name like that. Not that I like that in particular. But Scaruffi likes “Babes in Toyland - Fontanelle” which seems to be a good album. And the Riot Grrrl song “Pretend We’re Dead” is also good and he also likes it but I knew it from GTA San Andreas and I heard it while playing pool in the game. But anyways Bad Bunny music is listened to by even degenerates who chat on the free to play social server of Old School RuneScape. Yeah if you see someone in RuneScape complimenting some music, its probably bad music unless its actually from the games soundtrack (Which they’d rather listen to a trap remix of). I hate RuneScape players… And MMORPG players in general. Just a bunch of people who play games with below average game design. The best part of the game is probably the quests (Kinda like point and click adventure) which most players hate anyway. How come if you search up “MMOs suck” on Google, its just MMO fans talking about them on an MMORPG forum and all of the videos are about modern MMOS. Seems like MMOs could be a conspiracy made by an organization to waste peoples time. Well you know what, Im glad. They can waste all those idiots time. And also the stereotypes that MMOs are played by fat nerds who listen to progressive metal or even progressive rock seems to be false, seems like for Final Fantasy 14 or whatever the number is, the players are girls and feminist males and they watch anime. (This observation isnt a political statement. Just saying that the fans of this game are highly pro female, that doesnt mean the game is good or that their respect for women is really a job well done, they probably wear cat headphones, the streamer Zaric Zhakaron plays the game on occasion and wears cat headphones but he isnt really the stereotype were talking about, that guy is too ironic. I only know of this guy because I used to like Elder Scrolls 3 a lot and 2 to a lesser extent) Fine I dont even know who plays that game really so dont take that stereotype too serious, just a stereotype came up with by someone who sees some people talk about the game occasionally. So World of Warcraft, who plays that? Well it seems like its right wing people with brown hair and also left wing girls who have dyed hair. And none of them seem to be that genius when it comes to politics so get Foghorn Leghorn to tell em to shaddap, come out to show dem. Who plays Old School RuneScape? Well its mainly political center leans right people with black hair (But not East or Southeast Asian, probably not black either, though maybe half-black) who listen to bad to decent music and also go to the gym and care about religion a lot whether they are atheist or theist (But if theyre theist, its one of the real religions, not just theism in general), yet I dont think any of them chose their real life religion to be one of the in-game religions in the lore. (Fake fan, roight?) So what other MMORPGs? Well I dont know anything about the others. Well Everquest seems to have decent people as players. But that doesnt mean its a good game, but it does have cool aesthetics. So yeah sorry if that offends you but it shouldnt because those games arent that good and should be playing something more classy. Alright how about the cancelled Lego Chima MMORPG, who played that? Well its just kids who are kinda cool but not the most. Who played Lego Minifigures MMORPG? Well I was too afraid to download software on the family computer which the game required and didnt want to ask, so I dont know. Who played the fake MMORPG that I made with my McDonalds toys and I was every one of the best players of the game and also some worse players who were funny? Well thats the only MMORPG that is good. Unless you count Space Station 13 as an MMORPG and maybe theres something else like it that’s cool and focused around roleplaying (But not in a degenerate sense…)

Electric Underground reviewed Ninja Gaiden 2, will watch it… Anyways im gonna put the paragraph HTML5 “p” on here and boom. Well I will put this on my website along with part 1 of chapter 3 of Naga Tales and part 1 of chapter 3 of Laurence of India because people are starving and gotta give them the unfinished chapters.

It’s December 14 2025 12:06 AM. Im glad to have put that stuff on the website. But do people think Im crazy? Well I assure you Im not crazy and just trying to break the barrier of humanity as potentially true humanity has not been tried yet. Heres some books I might read. Lolita by Nabokov for the prose considered to be the best prose. Pale Fire by Nabokov because its metafiction and could be interesting to try and figure out. The Sound and the Fury by Faulkner, he complimented The Catcher in the Rye which is a great book and pretty similar to the film Taxi Driver, also I did read the first chapter of this months ago, was interesting though hard to understand but cool to have a mentally challenged person as the main character though only for 1 chapter. Prometheus Rising by Robert Anton Wilson, because it seems like an interesting perspective on stuff, might be pseudoscience but that could be cool. Might give some information on human behavior… Maybe the Illuminatus Trilogy by the same guy, but probably too weird of a book in terms of structure even though it is about the Illuminati. Stoner by John Williams, I read some pages a long time ago and it was interesting but its about some plain people. Ulysses by James Joyce seems like a good book. Well lets talk about books I did read in the past. “The Stranger” by Camus, never finished it because I didnt really care about the message that it was showing because it was nothing too crazy. The first chapter was the most interesting but it gets boring to me after that. So I probably only read the first half of it. “The Catcher in the Rye” is pretty much a slice of life story about encounters with phonies. So yeah thats pretty cool. “The Great Gatsby” we read in school, didnt find it interesting and yes Holden Caulfield in Catcher does compliment the book, but it doesnt make sense to me because the characters in the book seem like phonies. Unless he thinks that the book is a critique of phonies. But eh, seems like he thinks Gatsby is cool for having a catchphrase “Old sport.” Well the book is just too obvious with its themes which arent really that interesting to me. Too cliche… Yeah theres that word I havent said in weeks. Damn it. And Great Gatsby is too twee of prose. I rarely listen to two out of five Caravan songs from the album “In the Land of the Grey and Pink” which are the songs “Golf Girl” and “Love to Love You” for being too twee but its still one of my top 100 favorite albums. But thats a barely related tangent that is just to give a fact about myself. Once I pretended the characters in Great Gatsby were animals when we were reading it in class. But that didnt change anything. Actually I think it made one part funny but I dont really recall. Only did that for a little bit. But dont think that In a furry for this. They werent anthropomorphic. Ok? Well anyways the point is that Im gonna try to figure out some stuf about the world. Also my books are probably more funny than these ones. You know if you try to find funny books, you really dont find that many candidates. Some will say “feminist manifesto” is the funniest book, or some will say a purposefully bad fanfiction that doesnt go far enough is the funniest book, and some will say Confederacy of Dunces which seems to be decent enuff. But written text can be very funny because the voice acting in your head hopefully has no trace of bad acting that seems insincere.

So is my Gentle Giant themed sexual harassment Proclamation offensive? Its a few paragraphs above this one probably. Well I wasnt trying to be offensive but just trying to capitalize on an idea that I knew someone else would come up with and be hailed comedy genius. With a song called “Knots,” obviously somebody is gonna write a story out of song titles relating to gross stuff. Its been done before. But have any of them wrote a story so dumb? And besides, the sexual harasser in the story is not even hurting or pleasuring the woman he is banging allegedly in the “story.” And yeah maybe gone too far with the dog part but they have a song called Dog’s Life, you have to include a dog in the story or else… Well sorry if that made me seem cruel. And I know most Gentle Giant fans wouldnt appreciate it. Theyre a serious bunch if you ever talked in their Discord server. But they barely ever talk there, last I checked. Perhaps my idea has been done before. Many people write stories out of song titles. So dont think that I think it was a revolutionary IDEAR…

Anyways lets talk about FAPPING. I think that fapping is quite stupid to do TO MOST PEOPLE. Alright, you can really only fap to people you really like for a logical reason. I tried doing it with people I like a little bit. But it didnt work and I felt like a degenerate. Thats because I only had 30 minutes to fap unless I wanted to sleep very late which is a bad idea so I decided to just try something else. But yeah doesnt work. But it does work to imagine yourself banging someone who is a Upper Middle Tier “Person” (Just like how gamers call people an Upper Middle Tier Gamer based on their gaming opinions) IF the girl(s) who you like a lot are in the same room in the imaginary scenario while youre banging the Upper Middle Tier Person and also they are probably wanting you to bang them soon, but dont think this is a disrespect kind of thing.. And yeah the idea of threesomes or foursomes, kinda stupid and probably not easy to get them all with multiple organisms. Yeah sex needs modifications brah and Im not talking about sex toys, were talking cyborgion fleshinides, which is a yerm I made up but it should be obvious what it means, cyborg parts made out of human flesh so no cold metal to ruin your day. Or genetically modifying humans could work. But “banging” the Upper Middle Tier Person exclusively, that makes you feel like one of those degenerates, people often say jacking it makes them feel “Indian” which is pretty rude and we will get to defend India later in Laurence of India, the book Im writing. It should be obvious why the book is called Laurence of India anyway. But dont be offended thinking this is a white savior book, because its a Vietnamese savior book… Plus this guy is an Illuminati agent so its an Illuminati savior book more than anything. I asked ChatGPT if this was controversial, he said not really. And I know what many are thinking, asking ChatGPT for an answer is “morally objectionable.” But it is quite good to use for offbeat questions such as if the idea of a political ideology based around creativity is a good idea. And they said yes but it is post-ideology. So yeah you people insulting ChatGPT… probably cant come up with questions that you wouldnt want to ask a human because it would be too weird and also they’ll steal your idea and also they might not be qualified to answer. But I barely use ChatGPT… Plus I did use it for chemistry assignments of which I was not present for the “lecture” so I had no idea how to answer the questions on the worksheet which were asking me to answer what I saw during the lecture where the teacher did a science experiment which I was not witnessing because I was not there, so how could I answer what I saw? I had to ask what would happen to ChatGPT because Google had no answer because the experiment in question was very specific and not done often. And the reason I DID NOT GO TO THE LESSONS WAS BECAUSE…. People in that class are degenerates. And so was the tutor who was probably a Trumanali agent and the kid he tutored was also a degenerate. One day the kid wasn’t there, he just stayed in the classroom and tutored me. Damn it… Not fair. Maybe I am the “object” of which a cold war is going on for between Illuminati and Trumanali. Because the Illuminati saved me from going to that class. But that tutor criticized me for not helping with a lab. The damn lab stations could all be done by one person, theres nothing to help with. And plus you’ll be accused of being a “simp” probably. Thats probably the bait that was going on with this Trumanali agent and his nepotism son who is mixed race or disguised to look like he is part black. The kid that the tutor tutored wasnt helping either, maybe once or twice (Which I did that amount too). But the point is that you stop saying everyone who used ChatGPT is an idiot. Chemistry class also seems to be purposefully repulsive, referencing 90s sitcoms for kids and saying an actor is cute. After Trump won, the teacher stopped showing up to class. I do not believe that this was the real reason they stopped showing up. It is probably just a fake excuse to use to give people a worse education. Also she made people answer “get to know you surveys” with idiotic questions that make the answerer seem like they have an ego, “What is something you think is overrated?” Plus you’d just seem like some snob saying something is overrated that they never even heard of, because most of the popular music that people like aren’t really overrated by music critics. I guess you could answer a food item. But that would make some people seem like a snob too, if they don’t like fast food. (People will say they eat it to survive and its easy, which is fair enuff though maybe its more expensive than healthier food, but it has more calorie density and some people like the aesthetics of being fat (Includes Kim Jong Un most likely, as it is a social status marker in North Korea, perhaps many fat people worship him and joke about the nuclear button he might have on his desk, who knows what fat people get up to, after all it seems like social media is purposefully hiding them away, TikTok has been reported to hide fat people, also this tangent is a joak)) Also she didnt let me answer her question about where my work was for a “fun assignment” vaguely relating to chemistry, she even acts like ChatGPT since people say they try to finish sentences. She didnt even remember that she collected it. Well that teacher was annoying. And the first day of the class was too with a girl playing fart noises on a phone repeatedly. I drew a “violent picture” featuring animals with guns on the second day of class, the picture was found and they had to have a talk with me with some health people. And one of the health people who was a girl and they were all girls but this one was younger giggled when I closed my eyes when the psychologist put their foot which was in a sandal in front of my eye view which was looking at the ground. But thats a damn boring story that doesnt go anywhere interesting. But anyways lets just say that school sucks. Back to fapping discussion, yeah you dont really want to fap to an Upper Middle Tier Person or lower because that is degenerate. And also with the hierarchy, there is upper and lower of Low Tier and Middle Tier, but the third tier is Elite tier. Yeah sorry if this hierarchy makes Low and Middle look bad and Elite look too good even though its only one step above Upper Middle Tier. But this is just a made up hierarchy for basic explanation. Well the problem with fapping to an Upper Middle Tier Person is that you cant come up with good dialogue because you dont care that much about what they have to say. I dont think I watched any Van der Graaf Generator interviews for more than 2 minutes and theyre my favorite band. So probably not gonna watch an interview for an Upper Middle Tier person either sorry. .So yeah sirry about that one. So is there a link between physical attractiveness and the mind. I’d say yes to a degree. Obviously they get old. But are they unattractive because theyre old or is it because they ran out of good ideas so their physical attractiveness isnt even as good anymore? Well just show me someone who is physically attractive at age 70+ and also produces good work. How many ideas do I have? Hmm… I could probably do many sequels of the two main novels I have now. But fine I guess there is no connection because Peter Hammill is the most important member of Van der Graaf Generator, but Guy Evans looks cooler (When he does not have a beard and when he does not have a drumstick in his mouth and has a lot of hair, he looks like Malcolm McDowell (Who looked like a girl to a degree)). Damn it… Dont think its because Peter Hammill is 25% Pakistani if you think IM racist for this… Fine I guess girls like Peter Hammills looks more than any other member of VDGG with last fm comments saying they want to have sex with him. So yeah Im just not gay and therefore thats why I dont think he is the coolest looking. So thats it, I guess… But you know what, come to think of it, he probably is the coolest looking actually. I remember him looking cool in the Pawn Hearts inner sleeve. And theres a picture of him with Phil Collins, his eyes are wide open. Hair looks like Bob Marley in that picture. Hmm… Fine searching his name on Google Images, I guess he is the coolest looking member of VDGG. So boom… Is that proof? But who is the most talented member of Genesis, and is he the one who looks coolest? I say probably Tony Banks or Steve Hackett is the best member. The coolest looking member is Phil Collins though WHEN he has no beard or a beard that does NOT border the sides or top of the lips. (Mustache) An example of Phil Collins with a beard of such nature of coolness is “The Knife” single cover. The coolest looking member of Gentle Giant is Gary Green, but he does not look cool in the picture they chose for the band’s Wikipedia page so dont get the wrong idea of me or he. But the best member of Gentle Giant is probably Kerry Minnear who looks like Jesus. Well you know what? Its not right to be attracted to Jesus in that way. So I guess he ascends the attraction idea. And Im not saying Im attracted to any of the male rockstars here in that way, just using them to compare talent’s association with attractiveness. I dont know many all female bands anyway that I would be able to tell who is the most talented. For Pink Floyd, everybody thinks David Gilmour is the most attractive, and that is true in some pictures, but in one picture he looks like some “bimbo.” Did he really need to make a kissy face in the pink blanket photo? Everybody looks horrible in that photo. A guy with a mustache and long hair partially covering the eyes in a pink blanket just looks dissonant and Roger Waters looks like a caveman. But the best member of Pink Floyd is probably Roger Waters because he did most of the work on Animals which is their best album I think. And you’ll say what about his political opinions. But eh I think Roger Waters is actually the coolest looking member of Pink Floyd, he has the most unique look. But Richard Wright is probably second place. DAMN IT!!!! The theory was going smoothly but now its disproven. Unless David Gilmour is a better member than Richard Wright which most people would say. But I cant think that! But fine, David Gilmour has probably better vocals. BUT THATS A PHYSICAL CHARACTERISTIC.. NOT FAIR!!!!! Perhaps musicians who sing arent the best to calculate this with because they have voices which adds to the talent score through luck. This is damn horrible. We need damn technology to make any voice we want or ELSE this theory cannot be tested. Its time for revolution, baby. Also it is highly illogical to incriminate someone from using someones voice through imitation technology. What about aliens who have the same voice as this human? What if there was an animal or alien who could actually imitate sounds with perfection the way you wanted it? What about humans who have the same voice as this human? (Of all the billions of humans, perhaps two of them had the same voice.) Would we be genetically modifying living humans or giving birth to a genetically modified human just to record an album, or get some points in talent which would lead to us being more physically attractive? (If the theory is true) But fine, you’ll say my favorite movie is Taxi Driver and Martin Scorsese looks weird. Well he didnt write the script. Also Im willing to get a new favorite movie, I barely watched any movies. And yeah we all think it, why didnt he play Soft Machine instead of Cream in Goodfellas? Fine thats my old opinion from 2024. Well I think Soft Machine probably wouldnt fit the movie. But why not play Cream’s best song “Blue Condition”? That song is better than Sunshine of Your Love. Fine the lyrics are sad and the scene probably was supposed to be a love scene? Well I dont remember what scene that song played in, but the song Blue Condition talks about judgements made by you. And well, this relationship goes south so the lyrics might apply because you like the girl for illogical reasons (her looks which are decent enuff). Fine I forgot the movie so sorry if Im wrong about details. I dont really remember how it ended on the island.

I keep on writing crap about random stuff here instead of working on my books. But I came up with some interesting ideas now. I will probably write Laurence of India tomorrow afternoon. Naga Tales has been neglected but it will return…

Why I say idiot instead of retard, its simple. The word idiot simply sounds cooler. I have no idea why anyone would think the word retard sounds cooler than idiot. I think the usage of the word retard over idiot and thinking that it is a cooler sounding word is part of Zhamashura, which is a concept that will be discussed in my upcoming (it will take a long time to make, plus its not a main project and never will be) religious text The Book of Numob. There is a phenomenon of people thinking something is cool when it is logically not as cool as something else. Its like thinking progressive metal is cooler than progressive rock. No offense. Or its like thinking hard rock is cooler than progressive rock. (No offense to Pete Pardo)

Here is the philosophical scenario of awesome. If in some time in the future, all humans were born with a disease that’s symptoms occur slightly before the legal age of consent, and the disease involved either being turned into what visually looks like a character from an object show (cartoons on YouTube where the characters are cartoon objects with very simply drawn faces, I think they don’t even have noses) or another scenario is possible, you DIE if you have sex with a person with this disease. But the more interesting scenario is the object show scenario. But only 1 person gets no symptoms from the disease at age 16, the time where everyone else at that age and up has become visually similar to an object from an object show. Would it be morally wrong for the 1 person to have sex with someone below the age of consent, or should they have sex with someone who looks like an object from an object show? The answer here is simple… Sex is morally wrong either way in this scenario. Or is it? What if the person who is younger is actually smarter and wrote a novel about Bruce Springsteen and the Illuminati while the 16 year old only wrote a novel about a guy named Bob who lived on a farm, and the story has very basic themes and no interesting information about farming because the writer knows nothing about it? So here is my proposal. The age of consent should be turned into this, not an age but a test. The test of consent should be to be able to create 1 funny joak / humorous observation THAT IS ORIGINAL, and also purposeful. Many kids have said funny stuff but what they said would not be funny if there was not another person talking to them, most of the humor comes from the situation. I once heard that the show “Venture Bros” is hard to quote because most of its humor relies on back and forth banter. Therefore the test should force them to write a “joak” with text only. The joak could also be a story. I know what you’re thinking, some little kid could just write a bad story that is funny because it is poorly written. This is not going to happen, as they would take the test very seriously and even a joak like “What do you call a penguin that smells bad? A smellyguin!” is not going to be funny in the context of writing a funny joak to pass the test of consent, as it is obvious you are just a punk trying to be funny with a joke that makes no sense. A joak like that would best work in the context of an actual comedian saying it during a comedy show. Saying a bad joak in the context of a test is pretty much just makes you seem like you’re trying to seem like a punk who is flirting with a potential female judge who is reading your joak. So yeah, if you say a joke like that, you will get a restraining order honestly. This test of consent is a suggestion for the United States government and therefore you cannot say your joak is funny in other cultures (however it seems most cultures like slapstick the best, which is probably hard to turn into a worded joak that is funny), also a council of master humor analysts will be deciding the funniness, this will not be decided by the masses who laugh at unoriginal jokes or those with a low amount of layers and are unable to detect originality, even if a joak is so obvious and has obviously been made in the past (An example is censoring Dick Van Dyke’s name). An alternative test is to see if they can get all the puzzle pieces in the game Braid in less than 10 hours on their first try without a guide, notice how I say TEN hours, that is very generous. The amount of hours deemed acceptable as the marker of passing the test may have to be chosen wisely by an experiment team who will not be too generous. Sex is not a human right. I doubt any little kids will be beating Braid in that amount of time anyway. Also let’s talk about a theory I have about Braid. This game probably gave people headaches when they tried to lure a rabbit to the edge of a platform so they could time a jump and bounce off their head to reach a puzzle piece which is far and above lava, and they kept on rewinding time trying to get it just right. This is GOOD game design, giving people headaches for not understanding the game designer’s intent. Why would this game designer ever want you to do something so frustrating just to get a puzzle piece? The game is obviously a puzzle game and it would be stupid for a puzzle solution to be for you to be standing on the edge of a platform so a rabbit that you lured to this area is facing you and jumping towards you into the lava, and you jump at an exact time that lets you bounce of the rabbit as he is as far as he jumps and he is going to fall in the lava, but you will bounce off his head onto a puzzle piece in the air above the lava. That would give you a headache, so this is very awesome game design and I’m glad Jonathan Blow found a way to induce headaches in people who deserve it through the power of game design. This is honestly very revolutionary. I once wanted to make an album that gave people headaches but they would persist on listening to it because they like some aspects of the music but they are also turned on by its album cover, album title, and artist name combination which they would perceive as “based,” and wish to call it one of their favorite albums and put it on their “Topster.” I was not able to come up with an album cover, album title, and artist name combination though which might be the easier part than making the music that has some speckles that attract them but much that give headaches. However, one album I did make and didn’t even listen to after I made it, apparently gave someone whose favorite album is IGOR by Tyler The Creator a headache. Hell yeah, I guess he thought my album cover was charming which was done in MS paint. It’s not a good album at all. But you could accuse this guy of being racist because much of the album is in a Klezmer scale, which is from Jewish music. Obviously that is disingenuous because it is poorly produced in GarageBand and it is just a bunch of MIDI instruments playing lead at the same time with no rhythm instruments. But hey, I gave one person a headache. That’s good enough for me. And did he deserve the headache? Well he was pretty rude about the album and thought it was “meme music.” Anyways I remember not being impressed with the albums that he liked. Why this guy is listening to some obscure album with Microsoft Paint art (that wasn’t even that appealing or interesting, I think the background was just scribbles!) instead of some great classic albums he never heard, makes no sense to me. So yeah I’m not linking the album because it goddamn sucks. But yeah the “test of consent” is something that needs to be done for human progress, along with consistent logic as many adults are not as smart as some 15-17 year olds or even younger people. However, it would only be acceptable for a young person to have sex with a much older person IF the younger person is smarter (they could have the same exact knowledge and wisdom except the younger person knows one more fact than the older person, and that would be acceptable) than the older person. And I think it’s fair enuff because some older people look like they’re 18. Don’t believe me? Well I pretend some late 20s to early 30s people are 18-19 YEARS OLD when IM “BANGING” THEM. Its very believable. And Im 18 so thats the reason why anyway, I wouldnt keep on pretending theyre 18 when I am 25. Also it has come to my attention that the term “banging” might sound misogynistic. Well Ive seen people insulting the words cracked, railed, and smashed. Never seen anyone say the word banged is misogynistic when referring to sexxing, but its probably adjacent. Never liked the words cracked, railed, or smashed because they sound degenerate and like they were said by a wannabe gangster of the modern age or an inappropriate woman who is probably a philistine of the modern age. No offense brah. The word bang in regards to sex seems to originate from 1937. Also when I say banging, doesnt usually mean ruff stuff. Well the word “bang” is often said in South Park and Always Sunny in Philadelphia, shows I watched. Anyways I guess I’ll say “had sex with” instead of banged, but give me credit for not saying any of the newfangled terms. Yeah…

I’m still working on that song “Batto,” and I did write some Laurence of India chapter 3 part 2 today. But I havent worked on Batto in a few days. Sorry but its not a priority and I feel like music making is very hard. Also it seems like timbre is very important and I dont know if I really like that about music making, well I like timbre but I dont like trying to make it.

Some guy says Marilyn Mansons most famous song is a cover to insult him, a wise man but not the most knowledgable man says “this kind of logic can be applied on bbno$ and Jeff Buckley what's ur point bro” and a David Bowie fan responds saying “Neither of them brutally abused their wives and have actual artistic talent” AS IF the wise man was trying to insult bbno$ and Jeff Buckley, not that I even know who bbno$ is (searched him up, he probably sucks at making music), but I do know who Jeff Buckley is though I think his father was a better musician anyway. But the David Bowie fan gets exactly 7x more likes than the guy who was disproving this guys logic insulting Marilyn Manson. Why cant they admit that the insult has poor logic that also insults good musicians like Robert Wyatt (Thats why I say this wise man isnt the most knowledgable, because Robert Wyatt is the most obvious example to me as he is an undoubtedly good musician). Heres the reply anyway to the post. https://x.com/pragquartet/status/2000363676130214194 Anyways the person who insulted Marilyn Manson with an insult that insults good musicians if you follow the same logic, likes Xavier: Renegade Angel enough to put them in their banner. Damn it I like that show… Fine who cares. Every show is gonna have bad fans anyway. And the only reason why I think this person is bad, is because their logic is faulty.

So left wing people say the R word is cool to say or somethin’, I don’t get it. Why don’t you just come up with a new word that is even more offensive and for left wing people to use? Slurs seem to only be created without intent. Surely you can make a new slur, well it doesn’t have to be a “slur,” but a goddamn offensive word with a specific meaning. The thing about these “slurs” is that they have such a simple meaning that they are not even offensive. The gaming term “air player” is more offensive as it refers to a game developer who doesn’t play their own games or other games that their game is inspired by, they are an air player, a play on words of air guitar. But maybe the meaning of the word isn’t that important in its offensiveness. Why do these people use the same insults as their enemies? Why don’t they ever call someone’s breasts “Blunderbusts”? (I know you might say “Blunderbust” makes more sense because busts means multiple sets of breasts, but blunderbusts sounds better) Why don’t they ever call a shiny lipped person “Sheila”? Why don’t they ever call a couple “Dick and Horty”? This could be good for insulting Rick and Morty fans (Come up with some insulting terms for fans of other bad shows), or just a couple where one of them is a “Dick” (common slang term meaning rude person) and Horty meaning “hoor” or “whore” if you cant tell what “hoor” means. We need an insult word for people who like drawings of a naked body of a female character with marker marks on her skin on the front of her belly that are used to measure the characters wiener who is near the lady, usually with a title to go with each mark. “Hangosemite Sam” is one, because they jack it to cartoon characters in sexual situations, it’s not unfathomable that they would end up jacking it to Yosemite Sam if the artist drew them with a female character they like. The real problem with the marker marks thing is the fact that it is highly unlikely that the marker marks are accurate compared to an actual measuring tape or ruler that was made with technology. “Looney Haircut Boy” means someone who thought about Looney Tunes during a haircut. I don't recall if I ever thought about Looney Tunes during a haircut, we'll see if I remember next time. “Edgar Allan Foe” means a wannabe poet who is an enemy of you. “Vanquichester” means someone who plays Vanquish on God Hard difficulty. I am one of them. Also they have to LIKE playing on the difficulty to some degree to be called this word. Thats just a compliment term that I came up with a long time ago. In fact all of these terms are ones from several months ago. Here’s some slur ideas, “Gagoon,” “Jugoon.” “Green Bean Granny” is a “frang” (replacement of slang) term that refers to an older family member that tries desperately to "get you into" vegetables. The word “Crooker” means someone who crawls in the bushes. “Cart In My Heart Person” means someone who likes Mario Kart and thinks any of them is the best racing game. (Dont really have a problem with these people that much)

Anyways I really dont like these damn idiots going around acting like the word retard makes them cool for saying it or that people who dont want to say it are pansies. Truth is that the people who dont want to say it are right for the wrong reasons. Its “word theory” which Im sure some authors and songwriters (Especially Jon Anderson from the band Yes, who says his lyrics are focused around the sound of the words instead of the meaning of the words) are aware of, knowing which words make good sounds that makes you sound cooler.

Am I handsome? Well yeah and I take back saying that the Asian girl I saw that was more attractive than me is more attractive than me, sorry. Also Im more attracitve than all but 2 girls (From the past), though I am willing to include more people in this arbitrary list that is not even written anywhere or typed. But I cant even take a really great picture of myself that looks like I did in the mirror before I took a shower. Well Im not really trying to sneak a device into that bathroom and take a mirror picture of myself. Seems kinda stupid and not worth it. Plus the TV I have in my room can be used for a reflection. I have some good pictures of me on it with my iPad but none that will get swooning from all around the globe. But the phone is much worse. Maybe its the fact taking a reflective picture of yourself with a damn phone just makes you look dumb cause the phone just looks annoying. I felt like a damn degenerate every time I had to text my parents in school. Something about phones just make you seem like a degenerate. At least iPads make you seem like a dumb kid. I’d rather be a dumb kid than a degenerate. But hmm, are iPhones (My mom bought me one, I didnt even want it, but hey it helped me get extra Microsoft Rewards points (cause you can do searches on a mobile device daily to get some points) and I guess you can verify some accounts. And fine I did use it to emulate games (iOS 14 has a weakness that can be exploited and let you sideload any app that an .ipa file exists for, but guess what, many great video games that have been ported to mobile have no one posting an .ipa file that even works, tried to get Baba Is You, it crashed but some other games worked) and when I did emulate games I put the phone on my leg near my knee while squatting and used a gamepad to play the game. Mostly played Zelda games cause there were a lot of them I never played or beat and they are considered to be some of the best games. Well theyre good and I gave some 5 stars on Backloggd, (Link to the Past, Oracle of Ages, Tears of the Kingdom (Played that on switch obviously, this game is very flawed and not well designed but I like it for illogical reasons, and this game does feel like a single player MMO mixed with Banjo-Kazooie Nuts and Bolts) but eh probably none of them would be in my top 50 games I played and thats games I played and theres a lot of them that exist I havent played, I know of thousands of video games but many of them dont interest me and I will never play em, so got to find out more games, but there are many (maybe around 50) that do interest me though that I havent played or barely played)

Man already wrote 6320 words on this page lately. I got a lot to say I guess. Am I a contrarian? Well maybe… You could say that. Or am I just a free thinker who “thinks outside the box”? Family members have said I think outside of the box even though I wasnt even trying to. Come on…

Alright is it very wrong to think Im the most handsome?! Well the second most handsome male is Greg Lake in late 1960s and 1970s (mainly when he had long hair, though theres some equally good pictures of him with shorter hair). I have a similar but shorter haircut than him for now, though by accident. Anyways I am 25% French and I was always wondering which of my grandparents was responsible for this. Well it is obviously my grandmother who can speak English better than most of my older relatives and also has red hair (Though I thought it was dyed) I never knew one of my grandfathers. But couldnt be him as the Frenchie (Not an insult) because I got my last name from him. So yeah I gotta say I dont see race because I didnt realize my grandmother was French for a long time. Though I havent seen her in the last 5 years but I think I was shown a picture of her a year ago. Anyways Im not being gay right now complimenting Greg Lake, he even looks like a girl especially in one photo I see he looks like the girl I saw in 9th grade everyday and liked, first time I saw her I said “Cute” in my head and was not liking the idea that I would be thinking that everyday I see her but who are the brain police? Dont need brain police around… But Im not gay anyway. Alright and I would consider him more attractive than me if he was a girl (Not transgender though, no offense but thats pretty much the same thing only with a few extra words spoken in an alternate history) but looked pretty similar. Whose third place? Sorry I cant think of one that is good enuff. So yeah humanity is kinda screwed honestly. If theres only two particularly attractive males in all of history (And Greg looks too jolly in a lot of the pictures), THEN WEE DOOMED!!!! And eh sorry for hyping myself up anyway. But I swear the girl from 9th grade once looked in the direction of the area where I usually stand to wait to see if I was there because I was not in her line of sight. I was late and was behind her from pretty far away. Anyways I swear it… And what that means is she liked me just from my looks because I never said anything. That girl wore the same thing everyday. White long sleeve shirt and a black shirt over it that had no logo, at least that I could see. Heroes are only heroes to other heroes. So if Im ever complimented by a non-hero, I must be doing something wrong. Rupert Pooperts got 3 new followers ever since he returned to Twitter after not being on it since early 2024. He might be doing something wrong. And I am doing a comedy special with Rupert Pooperts that will be available as text called “That Pup’s Crazay!” But he is obviously doing something wrong and thats why he got 3 followers in a day (More than me ever), and I know this as he is not the coolest guy in the world, he likes the album “brat”, he got angry at me for insulting Roblox in my novel… But eh he did confuse some left wing person who thought he was a right wing person who loves saying the R word even though he was saying that R word sayers are “cucked,” I guess he thought the type of person to say cucked is the same type of person to say the R word. And fine I can say the R word but I don’t want to because it doesn’t sound that cool in terms of “word theory” which might not be a thing. Maybe there is an existing term for what I am trying to call “word theory.” Whats my opinion on the word “cucked?” Well I did notice that cuck is a very strong insult that actually you can feel the pain of someone being called it, even if they are not an actual cuck (They insulted some guy for advertising his video game on an RPG forum)

Alright so “word theory” in regards to slurs, we already said the R word isnt as cool as the word idiot. I searched up songs that uses the R word, the list that came up is a bunch of degenerate songs for partiers. The word idiot has the song “Idiot Wind” by Bob Dylan, which is much more sophisticated. Sorry if I dont know or remember a good song that has the R word, not trying to be disingenuous. Songs that use the word gook include a rap song from 2016 and a John Lennon solo song. Not interested in listening to either. Songs that use the N word include Holiday in Cambodia by Dead Kennedys. Living for the City by Stevie Wonder has it but its spoken word. Holiday in Cambodia is a good song. Im talking about the version on their first album, seems like theres another version of it that has more views, never listened to that one and skimming through it now, doesnt sound as appealing. So we’re just talking about how the slur words sound and if good music makers are using the word for musical purposes, regarding timbre. Don’t be offended, this has nothing to do with if saying the word itself makes you cooler. However it does have everything to do with if saying the word itself makes you less cooler. So we have decided that the R word has not been used in any good songs that I know of, if you know a good one then tell me on Twitter/X as a random post reply. The N word has been used however it seems like it is left wing people using it in the songs, or should I say song as it is only Holiday in Cambodia that I know that uses the word as part of a melody. (I didnt mention Woman is the N of the World, cause it probably isnt that gud of a song, or Patti Smith’s song) Also dont get the wrong idea, Holiday in Cambodia is NOT in my top 300 songs currently and probably wont enter it for the chorus is too obvious, sounds like a 6th grader made it while improvisationally singing in the shower. No offense, and maybe I wont even mind this truthful criticism in the near future… And yeah sorry this isnt the most interesting paragraph honestly, its pretty much like when Mark of the Electric Underground is trying to refute a video (Matthewmatosis’ Context Sensitivity video) he watched months ago in his Patreon podcast called “Topic Zone” but forgot a lot of details of the video. But at least here Im searching up stuff while he just talks without researching. But the point is this being came up with on the spot and not having the most information and stuf… We’re just feel like insulting people who say the R word who think the word sounds cool. I have the same problem with people who shorten words to clit, meds, trans (I got angry at Town of Salem players saying that instead of “Transporter”, it extended to transgender people who shorten the word, sorry but its the same word being shortened.. Alright I guess I cant get angry at people shortening this word for transgender because the damn Wikipedia page says its an official shortened term, I thought it was slang for people who thought they were in with the times… I dont have a problem with transgender people in particular, there are good ones (Most groups of people based on something as general as their identity will have mostly bad people in it. Only groups with purely good people are “fans” (Not necessarily a fan, as Scaruffi says he is not even a fan of any of the rock groups he likes the most) of something cool)) Our biggest enemies are uncool people in general who are slowing human progress by not being innovative and just saying the same stuff. People are soooo amazed by “‘Everyone is 12’ theory,” a very unrevolutionary concept that anybody could have come up with. Yesterday I thought maybe IM THE REINCARNATION OF SIGMUND FREUD, because previously I thought I was the reincarnation of Jim Morrison who talks about Freuds ideas in his lyrics. Though the reason why I thought I was Jim Morrison is more logical, with me feeling like I came up with “The blue bus is calling us” before I ever heard it in the song “The End,” but eh I couldnt be the reincarnation as I am not much attracted to his girlfriend/wife, same story with Freud anyway as to why THAT’S NOT ME. Saying “Everyone is 12” is pretty rude to actual 12 year olds. Well at least me when I was 12. Though I wasnt the coolest then. But still, honestly it makes no sense to insult someone by calling them 12 if you ever listened to the Bob Dylan song “My Back Pages” or the Byrds cover of it. The lyric “I was so much older then, I’m younger than that now” is a good lyric. I prefer the Byrds cover, more melodic and sang by a cooler voice of Roger McGuinn. Anyways I have to use this lyric to defend myself from the Low Low Tier Persons who I jacked to in the past. I need someone to put lyrics about beheading someone while they give you a BJ in a progressive rock song so we can all calm down, us poor people who have been TRICKED into jacking to Low Low Tier Persons… Not many of them were from p*** videos if thats what youre thinking… And yeah Im saying psychopathic stuff on purpose. So dont get alarmed. Its for comedic effect, but I am also trying to be a respectable figure so dont treat me like a villain. Anyways the day I first jacked it was April 1, 2021 which was a couple of months before I first listened to progressive rock. Hell yeah.

I had crazy dreams this morning too. But dont think theyre too interesting so maybe skip on this one. Its december 15 2025 5:12 PM! And yeah I trusted somebody to help me and turns out he was trying to sign me up for Scientology. Yeah I didnt have much faith that Scientology was real so I had to run away and I threw flower pots at the womans who were part of the Scientology but one was cute though chubby. Well I tried to kiss her, didnt work. Anyways I also tried to kiss a girl in yesterdays dream too who hated me anyway. Well this is good development. Many dreams have me playing an MMORPG (Often one that doesnt exist in real life, I once got a virus for signing up for one which was a fake game and the guy who gave me the virus was chatting with me and he was trying to see if I was cool enuff to deserve the virus being removed, but the dream didnt go on long enuff for such conclusions) and MMORPG is a genre I dont like. Freud says dreams are based on infantile wishes or something like that. But I searched up Isaac Hayes Wikipedia to get information on how much he liked South Park and well couldnt find anything but I read the scientology stuff which was stuf I already knew. So thats where Scientology idea came from. Also I played a board game in the dream and someone suggested including Monopoly figurines into the board game because we had them so we should make custom rules to include them in the game, also the Monopoly came with a yellow toy car Hot Wheels style. I ignored that car and played with toy cars that you wind up to race them. This is because during Thanksgiving 2025, younger kids were playing with wind up cars which had unorthodox wind up mechanism. Also there was a Yoshi car which felt slippery when you touched it, also in another dream after that one, the Yoshi car made an appearance again where it actually looked like Yoshi, in the previous dream it just looked like a shampoo bottle shaped like a car but with no labels. So fine I guess it wasnt even a Yoshi car in the first dream. But I time travelled in the other dream and found old people from America seeing this Yoshi mario kart toy car and saying “This could have only come from Britain or Japan” and I thought that made sense. Someone told them that Yoshi is a Japanese name and they were shocked. Also Rick and Morty was a part of the dream. Probably because I mocked it yesterday night. And I was travelling to different planets through some interface and not even acting like it was unusual at all and obviously a dream. Yeah I was Morty and I was a part of the family but Rick wasnt there. But that was not the cool part of the dream. Anyways I needed to spray some crap from me in the Rick and Morty planet (That show takes place on Earth in a multiverse, but this dream has no multiverses and their version of Earth is just another planet I guess) But yeah I got so far from that Rick and Morty planet so I probably was gonna die because I couldnt spray some crap on me that would keep me alive. So yeah thats the dreams… Sorry if not interesting enuff.

Freud talk: Is my dream where my legs were a unicycle (which are hard to stop) in a sauna and accidentally got peen in someone governed by the pleasure principle, wish gratification, and the repressed sexual scenarios of childhood? Thats a dream I had a long time ago and also the sauna was all female except for me. I was not invading though, because nobody seemed to mind. Also yeah the sauna looked like Backrooms which is not a meme I find funny or interesting, though seems like its supposed to be scary.

So is sex degenerate? I think so and it is unnatural and not logical for the most part, and therefore it is fair to say sex is degenerate because if you ate all but one grain of rice because you were full and afraid, and were asked if you finished the whole plate, would you really say there is one grain of rice left? People will just think you’re trying to be funny for something that isn’t that funny, which can potentially cause them to lose respect for you, a risk not worth taking. So people say polyamory is bad. Well it is for all these people as what they are doing does not pertain to the realms of logic. It’s the Zhama effect. Sorry brahs, (also when I say brah, it is short for brahmin (Indian term), if you didn’t catch that). So yeah polyamory makes sense when there is less attractive males and more attractive female people. And I know what youre saying, males have made higher quantities of beter music and beter games and stuf… Well I would say theres only one male kid from school who was uber cool and its the kid I played Wild Kratts with in 1st grade (though he became cooler later). Seems like there was 1 uber cool girl I saw in school hallways in 12th grade who allegedly did a Napoleon Bonaparte impersonation that I didnt hear (She mightve been the girl who I liked in 9th grade because they had the same hairstyle and also they both wore the same clothes everyday, though different clothes) because I was too far away at the time. And potentially her friend is cool too as “Heroes are only heroes to other heroes,” also she mightve been impressed by my looks because she made a vocal utteration (Dont remember what, but it was one that would make you think good stuf) when she walked by me. So boom, theres 1 cool male (who is not me) and 2 cool females. So 1 and 2… So the point is “2 girls for every boy” as stated in the song “Surf City” by Jan and Dean, though written by Brian Wilson (Who is a genius). Alright Im just saying 2 girls for every boy is a good idea (Maybe we have to restrict the word girl and boy for cool people only, so uncool people cant capitalize on this). Brian Wilson sadly never got to see his vision. Its a disgrace. So yeah brahs… I think I need to look at my high school area craigslist or somethin similar if there’s girls who sad they’ll never see me again. Yeah… Anyways just saying brah, “2 girls for every boy” is potentially a hidden Beach Boys song (as it was given to Jan and Dean, though Beach Boys did a “cover” on a compilation that is obscure) because the lyric is only for true fans (who are wise) to hear. So why is doing a Napoleon Bonaparte impression in a school hallway something that makes someone uber cool? Come on, its very obvious why. So yeah there might be more cool girls than males actually if we want this “2 girls for every boy” lyric to be highly logical. Which we do… And you’ll say “you just want to be selfish, brah” and “you used to make fun of polyamory people…” If you’re a friend of mine, you’ll say that “You criticized the game ‘Thrillville: Off the Rails’ in 2022 for having an achievement that is pretty much endorsing polyamory. (Casanova: Become sweethearts with 10 park guests.) Hypocrite much?” And argh… But can you disprove the “2 girls for every boy” being an illogical idea? You’ll say “There’s not double the amount of females to males.” And I’ll say reword your sentence because someone is gonna think you’re talking about FTM transgender. Then you’ll say “I’m speaking the typical terminology for ratios in mathematics,” and I’ll come up with a theory that the terminology “Female to Male” and “Male to Female” for transgenders is actually a scheme to ruin mathematical ratios and to also make transgenders look bad for being “anti-math.” Is this like Charles Manson scheming to kill white actresses and blaming it on the Black Panthers to start a race war? It is like they want Asians to kill transgenders for a war of some sort. Yeah I dont like mathematics as much as some Asians though but perhaps I will if I become a programmer. I dont know if I want to be a game designer that much anymore. I felt like I could come up with a game that is actually good but respected by both smart and less smart gamers. I dont know if I could. I guess Resident Evil 4 (2005) is the most obvious example of this. Its a good game but I prefer Vanquish from the same director which I do consider to be the best action game (Though it could be improved a lot, I dont blame you if you dont like it that much even if you play it on God Hard difficulty) Anyways you will say “I don’t want to talk about your conspiracy theory as we are talking about you who is on the stake of burning. There is not enough females for every male if we turn the lyric ‘Two girls for every boy’ from the song Surf City as gospel.” And I will just accuse you of taking stuf too literally and also not paying attention and being a disingenous arguer. Derpy Rainbowz said someone was disingenuous for saying that Elaine from Seinfeld was attractive with a picture of her looking like the guy who thought he was L from Death Note and a lipstick color that pretty much looks like you ate meat loaf and got the sauce on your lips (We aint pedophiles so miss me with that goody-goo bullshit...) as proof, and he told me that he thought that they would post a more flattering picture in response if he said “Not doing it for me,” like old people (which he is one) often do. Anyways I will write more Laurence of India tonight probably. Chapter 3 Part 2 I will also try to watch The Rehearsal Episode 4 of Season 1.

Taylor Swift - Lover review written on November 15 2025

"Taylor Swift music is horrible. She tried fusing herself with anime with her album that uses vocoders. Seriously, using vocaloid stuff with your voice is trying to be fusing yourself with anime. Leave anime alone and leave humans alone, no need to fuse them, it's diff dimensions." - My friend Rupert Pooperts

The album cover thinks its anime with pink cartoon heart on the face, that is not anime. Which is the point I guess because they dont want to go full on with the human-anime fusion concept as it would be bad for business, vaguely alluding to it probably gets you some fans as a net bonus though who notice.

The melodies of this album are from a scale tradition of phoniness and organization made, similar to the Transatlantic accent which is a fake accent.

They have quit being inspired by Alice Cooper but without guitar. Lyrics about not being nice anymore have been left behind for lyrics about heart beating like a hammer, similar to Fleetwood Mac first album with Peter Green. This is a pathetic attempt at fondling blues fans (Ala the Doors sketch of Kids in the Hall, "Theres a granny in Africa beating on a drum, shes a Doors fan, she never heard the tunes but she's a rider on the storm," lets just mock the fact Taylor Swift team has treated a comedy sketch as gospel) even though they do not use blues scale very often if at all in this music, and also omit guitar in many songs. History is to be repeated. Some say every evil act has already been done, as implied in the Bible. But some may say that is not true as there are many body parts and many combinations of which can be removed to create different combinations of evil. But let's give a true infinite answer to refute this Bible supposed profound statement. This music is evil and theres many ways it could be more or less evil due to its manufactured annoyingness.

The song "Miss Americana" is trying to copy "Rock the Casbah" with its piano part during the chorus but due to their neglect of the blues scale, they do not have a similar effect, its similar to a "ruined orgasm"'s effect which I am accusing fans of this album of having a fetish for. Perhaps some psychologist of a semi-Freudian kind can link musical tastes to fetishistic desires, it could be a realm worth exploring. Freud has been stated to be completely unmusical and found its emotional effect irrational. Perhaps they made him feel a way that made him feel like a degenerate in ways nothing else has ever done.

This album is trying to make a political statement but fails at referencing stuff like even the same song they tried to copy "Rock the Casbah" due to a lack of knowledge of the world, only referencing people they know personally in the song "You Need To Calm Down" along with people on the internet that they claim not to know. She is literally trying to be an anime girl, all so "innocent" and "thoughtful" and wants to encourage some mental patients (who are also more likely to be LGBTQ, which this song defends) who hear this song on the portable radios given to them by staff of the hospital to imagine "banging" her to make her feel better about the hate. It is a song that exploits LGBTQ people using them as a pawn for a game of psychological warfare.

All in all, this album is of a sinister nature with CIA tier experimentation, with subtle anime-human fusion (which could be a good thing for certain people but needs to be handled properly, also anime is a visual medium and the album cover of this album would barely ever be considered anime, which they did on purpose), with anti-Blues scale sentiment despite copying songs that use Blues scales, potentially neglecting them to attract a certain audience, cough cough. The psychological warfare within the songs is to create fanaticism and arrested development, and I am not referring to the TV show which some slightly trustworthy fellow says is one of his favorites but it appeared to not be funny from the best moments compilation I saw.

Goodfellas review : Scorsese seriously doesnt even use one of the top 5 songs from the album Disraeli Gears on this movie. He chose the 10th best song on the album for the movie, which is the song Sunshien of your Love. Hack alert. No offense. Even the game Saints Row 2 is more burtal than this anyway cause in that game you get a uncool guy to kill his girlfriend with a monster truck. Hahaha. And well fine its not the brutality that we cinephiles care about. Also when Tommy goes on the I'm a clown rant, sorry but he says his lines too fast, pretty much like hes machine gunning through it with fruit way, because we guys we always try to amuse the ladies in the courtroom and yiou know that just isnt happenign if youre gonna machine gun a sentence which just makes you seem like a swampy type from you know butt... Anyways the gangsters in Saints Row 2 would probably be less nervous during the "Funny how?" part and also be able to analyze humor and give an explanation as to why such story was amusing. Howeever, the main character in this movie who isnt even in the middle of the poster because they knew he isnt that cool. Well, he just says funny over and over again, just doesnt seem that cool of a guy. Theres story about reading about a mentally challenged guy called Sound and the Fury chapter 1. If he read that, he would probably cry tears out of his eyes like Niagara Falls. He'll like like the crying emoji or summin, and that wont be gettin the ladies swooning and "pooning" whiuch would lead to a Rock N roll suicide. But he'll be doing it to sunshine of your love instead of one of the many sadder songs from the album just because Martin Scorsese didnt put that in the damn soundtrack. "As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster," the opening line, thats just Great Gatsby twee bull. This movie is a chic flic in disguise. Sorry if that term is derogatory according to Google Definitions. And I respect the women and the people of this town. Thanks. But this movie probably has more anime cutesy drawings of the characters than Bruce Springsteen does (He has 0, I checked) which confirms that Goodfellas is more girly and Bruce Springsteens music is more manly. Theres not even manime of Bruce Springsteen so if you only find manime of Goodfellas, that still means that Bruce Springsteen is more manly. Manime means anime that is drawn in the art style of manliness as far as cartoons can go anyway. SO HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bruce Springsteen is referenced in the game Saints Row 2 because the player character is referred to as "The Boss," which is Bruce Springsteen's nickname. This is further proof that Saints Row 2 is better gangster media than Goodfellas.Edit December 16 2025 12:33 AM: The Saints Row 2 characters would not find Tommy's story amusing or funny in the first place however, so they would not even be complimenting him by calling him funny and getting into an awkward predicament.

Brat Charli xcx review

First songs sound fx is inferior to Easy Money by King Crimson. Plus many musique conrete use better sound fx usage. The first song purposefully compliments people named Julia, a name that is highly likely to be a future psychologist. Perhaps they want this music to piss people off in the psychology ward. Very simpole music which once could have made from a tree. Beavers could make it, is what I am suggesting.

The song Club classics is just the same philosophy as people who want to listen to Christmas Music from 50s and clubs would likely be playing Christmas music in christmas time. Saying they wanted to be blinded by the lights, seems like an insult to Bruce Springsteen whose music would not be played in the clubs they go to. Musically this song is vulgar and if it had a music video, the video would only be in a p*** website and there will be epileptic "doggystyle" during the "electro" part which would most likely take place in a club which would be public indecency. The subtext is easy to see. Sounds like rhythms of a boring banging.

They keep on mentioning a person named George. It is an established fact by my comedic philosopher friend Rupert Pooperts that George is not a name that a jock would have. He searched up "jocks named George" and they gave him a sportscaster and a flamboyant wrestler as the most famous jocks named George. He also cited Seinfeld as proof of it not being a jock name. This music is purposefully trying to get those who hate jocks comforted. "George says I'm just paranoid" is a lyric that refers to psychologist ambitions, which we need less of in this country as they misdiagnose many children and may potentially lead male children into growing breasts as a side effect of the medication. Even further proof of anti-jock sentiment is "Why I can't even grit my teeth and lie" which is an obvious allusion to a Beach Boys song "Don't Back Down" which has lyrics about a surfer who is described with "They grit their teeth (a-oo), they don't back down." Notice the lack of vocal harmonies on this album despite this person claiming to have many friends who are musicians.

The song "I might say something stupid" is an attempt to sound like The Smiths, it is clear from the name of the song. They edit their vocals to sound like a crooner, it doesnt work and has the blue ball effect.

The song "Talk talk" is a clear copy of Summer by Calvin Harris without electro-only no-vocal parts", presumably because they want to seem like innocent philosopher types Bob Dylan or something, instead of being a sex anthem like the song Club classics was, although it is a "quickie" type of anthem, presumably due to the nature of the song taking place in a club which implies public indecency and I guess theyre too afraid of getting arrested.

"Von dutch" is a song to get a male audience who thinks that Von dutch is a Red Dead Redemption reference as the game has a character named Dutch van der Linde. However Von dutch is a fashion company. This is no different from the time my friend Rupert Pooperts tried to trick a fan of the game Expedition 33 which he referred to as E33 into thinking when Rupert said that AW2 is more strategic of a game, that they would think he is referring to the famous recent game called Alan Wake 2 which could hardly be called strategic when he is actually referring to the game Advance Wars 2, a game that most gamers interested in the hobby should have heard of even if theyre not interested in it. However that did not work as the person he was trying to trick into an argument, does not seem to have any desire to have arguments about game design as they are unable, preferring to talk about politics surround games. The lyrics are no different than those people trying to write a word that looks like it says True and False during a True or False quiz. With vocal distortion like this, it is to make it so the song sounds like a badass song that male listeners would listen to while playing cowboy games (Though you wont see them playing the arcade game Gun.Smoke from 1985 which Red Dead Revolver was actually a spin off of) keeping listeners to think that it is about a cowboy. "Do that littlе dance, without it, you'd be namelеss" sounds much like a cowboy lyric, as shooting the ground in front of someone and telling them to dance is a common trope of Wild West media. Cowboys are often nameless, such as the famous Man with No Name.

This album is psychological warfare, no different than Operation Wandering Soul.

Disorder in the Court Three Stooges review: I know we all like playing the fourth stooge while watching the three stooges, but don't do the pants down routine during this episode. Because THEY MIGHT THINK YOURE INTO THE DANCING AND THINK ITS SEXY. Come on, theres sexier stuff. But I do wonder, is this what Bruce Springsteen was referring to in his lyrics "Well, I came home from work and I switched on Channel 5. There was a pretty little girly lookin' straight into my eyes. Well, I watched as she wiggled back and forth across the screen. She didn't get me excited, she just made me feel mean" Can anyone confirm if Three Stooges was ever on Channel 5 in a location that Bruce Springsteen has been in before or during the year 1980? It's time we solved a Springsteen MYSTERY! But this is a mystery nobody cares about because they dont pay attention to the lyrics as hard as me. If you say youre a Springsteen fan, I dont really care because millions of people are and they dont care that much. Anyways this Three Stooges was really funny and interesting. What makes it so great is the fact that you get to hear some great music and also Curly does funny stuff and makes unique voices (Someone, go put it in a song) also there is some clever stuf like thinking that a toupee is a tarantula. This probably should be used to teach kids about that animal in school. But I guess its too "sexy" because theres a lady dancing in some clothing that isnt really appropriate. Welp there goes that PLAN... Charlie Chaplin was more appropriate and we saw him go up a pole in one of the scenes in his movies when we were a learning about 1920s. But that pole was too high to realistically be a stripper pole so we were all not turned on. But who knows what goes down in peoples pants. He was running from a tiger in a cage, heh we were talking about Bruce Springsteen so WHAT IF IT WAS A JACKSON CAGE!!!! (That's the name of one of his songs) But this isnt a review of that. This is just a great short film that is badass. They play Tic Tac Toe on the back of someones clothes. Hmm, kinda wish they played a game with more gameplay depth. But for comedy pruposes, they can just play it wrong. You know I saw a post of some lady bragging about her kids playing Chess instead of watching TV and they had damn checker pieces mixed in and the chess pieces werent in the proper alignment. I doubt they were playing a variant of Chess but this was jut bad parenting that nobody shames because they are all bad parents who don't even ensure that theyre playing the game properly. Just a bunch of LARPers encouraging their children to be LARPers. They should be letting their kid be watching Three Stooges.

Why dont leftists just draw grotesque p*** of their political rivals? Thats the real question honestly. Keep on saying “r word” over and over again and acting ljke your enemy, it wont work. Its December 16 2025 5:12 PM. Arent left wing people considered to be more artistic? Why not draw grotesque p*** of your political rivals. Seriously, why havent they done it? Too scared? And obviously you will be asking, how big should we make their peens in the drawings, should we make it micro? Well youre the artist here. But keep in mind making it micro might be inaccurate and also offensive to people who actually have a micro. Im just thinking about Chris Chan’s drawings of Mary Lee Walsh naked and touching her Virginia. Its drawn very crudely and on paper, looks like a kid drew it. So yeah go on and do something like that. Just an idea, apparently a picture of Winnie the Pooh Xi Jinping offended him. Though I feel like I saw some guy saying posting a picture of that is not good activism. Well sure posting an edit someone else made isn’t, but making the image is. Maybe make this grotesque p*** a music video and come along with a good diss song that could be considered as high art. Just brainstorming for you.

Searched up some people from my school days. Let's just say they're all not as cool as they used to be. Pretty much have it better than em… And yeah you’ll say… Well we don’t need to do a what you’ll say… Cause theres lots of stuff you can say that I said which was wierd. Well a girl who I was friends with in Kindergarten went to prom with a guy who has the same name as me. Plus we both like Grateful Dead (Me and the guy with same name as me). This is suspicious much… Not jealous though but perhaps a furry who was my friend in 4th grade is. He wasnt a furry then though. Also I dont have a problem with furry. Anyways couldnt find anyone that cool on there. Well some people who I knew were cool I saw but they werent posting anything cool. Also the girl who said I was funny twice might be with an antisemite who is a foreign race that I cant identify because I dont see race that well, but he might have mispelled a word on purpose just to make it sound cooler but it ended up sounding like jew. But that guy also seems to think hes evil (Might be joking) and I wonder if I ever acted evil in those days. Well all I gotta say is that this is some immense suffering everyone I saw are having. Not to mention the fact 80% of the males are circumcised in America. Jeez… Also not really interested in anybody I saw. I dont care if I wasnt even seeing the regular students from my grade during my last 2 years of high school. Couldnt find the one girl who I liked in 9th grade. But I dont even know what grade she was in at the time so maybe she isnt even in my grade. But you know what, cool people arent gonna be on Instagram and following the schools account. There were some cute girls at the school. Once at an assembly I sat near one (I assume she is a cute girl because she had a cool hairstyle, didnt see her face) and farted 3 times when an annoying student was trying to be funny on stage (I think I saw the student who wanted to be my friend by hunting for me in the hallways had a problem with this guy too, cause I saw him say this guy needed to be defunded cause hes in student council) and I think my farts disrupted him and he got nervous. The assembly was mental health crap that helps nobody. 27:53 has a kinda cool looking girl. But was looking at the wrong slideshow. Well was looking at Yiutube channel of the school. I mightve seen the cute girl who I sat next at an assembly, probably not interested… Actually seen her in another photo, might be interested… Also “name theory” seems to be true. My real name sounds like the name of someone who could be famous. In fact I think some girls said I looked famous or that someone else in the class looked famous, that was in finance class grade 12. Well the point is that Ive seen this persons name before and thought they might look cool. And I was right…

December 17 2025 Damn it… The girl who allegedly put boogers on the floor before is better looking than many. She kissed me on the cheek once in 1st grade. But I wasn’t happy about it then, and not happy about it now cause would be better now than then. Dont think that I care about that though. Anyways to think me and my friend felt we were above this girl and her boyfriend (Who always talked about the Konami code and websites that do something if you input the code) and he sang “When you love someone it opens up your heart” at the lunch table. (I think the song is called Love Someone by Lukas Graham). Jonathan Blow wouldnt approve of the two programming languages he knows. But hey thats more than me with 0.

I think I was wearing my dead Grandpa’s black jacket when I farted 3 times at the assembly. Yeah I think I look pretty damn cool in that jacket.

Also yeah yesterday I did put Tarkus all the way from the 230s up to number 1 best song on my favorite songs list. This song is really damn good and awesome keyboard tones, cool vocals and maybe the coolest drumming in any song.

The kid who I was STEM partners and he had a horrible idea for what would be the fastest car made out of LEGO going down a ramp (All you have to do is put a platform on wheels) Well he is trying to be some activist about schools wasting your time with useless activities. I agree but eh this guy isnt the coolest and also he said he doesnt listen to music but listening to country music while driving is “a vibe” according to him, that’s the Zhama effect in motion. Anyone could figure out that school is wasting time with childish activities like having to make a poster in English class.

Alright so the guy who is with a girl who called me funny twice in a row and is the guy I called “foreign” that I couldnt tell what race, is actually Italian. I see that he “reposted” an image about how it feels being loved by a girl who hates men. Hmm… Didnt know that about her. (Maybe I remember her saying something like that, its hard to remember) Anyways seem like this guy wants to have sex with a Fortnite skin, though I guess its ironic, cause he reposted it. Well lets just say that nobody is normal in this time period. Well I see a Agartha meme reposted. Jeez this guy actually is potentially a antisemite like I joked that he could be. (One of his usernames is like if you took the word Whoville and called it Jewville because the first letter of your name is J but if you replace the W of Whoville it becomes Jhoville and well that is not clear what the pronunciation is so you make it Jewville. Thats a similar premise of what his username is on one of his many accounts but obviously Whoville isnt the word he changed.) Also I have a theory that most of these people on Instagram are damn Trumanali agents. Because I havent seen most of them for the past 3 years, some of these people might be there to demoralize some cooler people who were tricked into being their friend. Never even heard of this guy and apparently hes friends with 4 people I know of, 2 of them are cool, 1 is sarcastic and wanted to be my friend, 1 is incompetent at being a class clown. What doesnt make sense is that some of these guys are in the jazz band but their Instagram posts have music that jazz fans would be making fun of. I was researching criticisms of Taylor Swift for my review to see if my ideas were original and I saw r/jazzcirclejerk insulting them. Well he is listening to girly crap but the gender equivalent. Also I dont really care about any of these girls on there in particular. Seems like the coolest people dont even have an account on there that you can find by their real name. So should I troll some people? Is there anything to gain though? Forgot many facts about these people and theres not much to find out about them with these posts.

Oh god… Does circumcision MAKE YOU FUNNY?! Tony Zaret last name might be Jewish according to Google though it is also Slavic name, seems more likely to be Slavic but still 80% of males are circumcised in USA. Nathan Fielder is Jewish, he might be circumcised. Hmm, I dont know dude. What if I was circumcised but given my foreskin back and that is why I have extra foreskin, as REPARATIONS?! Alright this is obviously a faulty theory as we could not describe 80% of males in USA as funny. So why did I even write this paragraph if I knew it was obviously false?! Consider this an audition for the Illumina.

Alright Tony Zarets new video had a very funny part when he ate the metal rod and then it cut to an actors manager saying some stuff about a sex scene and then he saw the stream (Funnier if you watch it). Well the video is called “I found lost media’s holy grail!” But eh it had one funny part. Rating: 8/10 could be better, it gets high rating for the very funny part (Though I guess its nothing too mindblowing but made me laugh) His eyes are messed up in the editing so that adds humor to the video.

What if this guy was Celery? The guy who is with the girl who called me funny twice in a row (Lets just say he probably isnt considered to be as funny as 2nd grade-5th grade me, if the taste in humor from his reposted memey jeebies is the hint (I doubt girls would find those funny)). Celery is the name of the guy who had a weird haircut that looked like celery (This is distinct from “broccoli hair” and this guy has “broccoli hair” but perhaps Celery actually had “broccoli hair” and I was mistaken) and he was wondering why I was sitting at a table. Well the reason I sat that damn table was because I was there first and people just sat there cause they sit there everyday probably and I didnt know. He was the only one who seemed to have a problem. You really think people are gonna memorize who sits at a damn table… I guess they do that. I dont… But Celery is probably a grade higher than me and I didnt know anybody at that table. That was a long time ago.

Theory of Circumcision: Nathan Fielder is circumcised. His comedy is considered mean-spirited. The Three Stooges were circumcised. Some of their anti-World War II shorts are considered racist to Japanese people. Circumcision is traumatic and leads to spiteful acts. Jerry Seinfeld wanted to return a clothing item because of SPITE, in the show Seinfeld, a show that insults circumcision haters (Though they failed because they made the funniest character on the show say it is barbaric, some might say the writers of Seinfeld are secretly uncircumcised, but that is not part of the theory).

If you think its egregious for me to say I made a “theory” about circumcision that is completely based on two random observations, then you are also insulting Alexandria Octacio Cortez who came up with a “theory of height” which is that smaller people might be spiritually taller which is a bunch of nonsense and just shows they think taller is better. Not that I care though. Also the former classmate who likes the Konami code and is girlfriend with a girl who allegedly put boogers on the floor in elementary school, well he is shorter than her. And maybe I am too, I dont know if Im taller than this guy. And also the fact that she allegedly put boogers on the floor is nothing to be ashamed about. School teachers who are shrews and are mean complain about people putting boogers on the walls. Probably because theyre banging the custodian who reminds them of the p*** videos because he’s bald. And he said Im only giving you this if you tell those “crotch goblins” to STOP DOING BAD STUFF. Also in high school I saw some custodians getting in a fight, one being rude to a student saying “I dont negotiate with young people” or something like that and the other guy was like “Come on, these are high school kids.” Well these workers who are doing jobs like that and also lunchladies, they seem somewhat sinister. Lunchlady says “Only in high school” cause I didnt know what food they had and I just picked a tray with spaghetti on it and wanted the chicken instead but I couldnt return the tray but they didnt have to make a sarcastic comment. I had a canker sore so the sauce would get on my lips too and touch the sore. But eh, I guess its the rules but theres no way of knowing the rules cause theres no rules list around. Common sense you say, well you should know that I myself once told some people in a Discord server to use common sense cause there were no rules channel in the server. I got called a mature member of the community by a moderator. Jeez… So you see if you’re going to use the common sense rebuttal, IM ACCUSING YOU OF WANTING TO BE CALLED MATURE BY A MODERATOR, OR THE EQUIVALENT OF THAT IN THE ESTABLISHMENT. Anyways what was Alexandra Octavio Cortez even thinking with that theory? Hbomberguy endorsed this asshole? Hbomberguy has many problems too. His measured response videos dont go far enough with interesting refutations along with more examples of what he is insulting. His gaming videos are ok but he acts like he can refute Matthewmatosis. At least he thinks Braid was “pretty good” Alright I’ll admit it I barely watched his gaming videos. The reason why is because they have dumb titles and also memey thumbnails (Deus Ex: Human Revolution video. Also that is a game which I bought for about $1 and also never played for more than 1 hour) AOC has the speaking mannerisms of a middle school teacher. Also I feel like I called my 8th grade social studies teacher an English teacher in an older paragraph. Sorry if that made it confusing. Cause my 8th grade English teacher was male and my main enemy. But the social studies teacher was an enemy too I guess cause she wanted to be alone with me on Google Meet. Come on, thats not cool. I closed the tab, hahahahahaha. But yeah seems like “everyone is 12 theory” is a byproduct of AOC coming up with a theory. So she started a movement of bad theories. Lets keep it up Plootonians cause I feel like I can come up with more interesting and more egregious theories than them. And if any fans exist, lets do this. But this is just a side project and not a main project so dont take it too serious.

Well I found out some more facts about people from school. Not interesting for you though…

I worked on my song Batto for over 2 hours earlier… Added a lot of stuff. Pretty cool… Also I think “Two girls for every boy” from the song Surf City is a nonsense idea and if Brian Wilson who presumably wrote the lyric never even had that, I guess it means its not to be followed as gospel.

Alright here’s my new theory: Life is not real. Also it’s 5:06 AM December 18 2025. But anyway everything seems to be fake as crap. This life just feels so much like something I have created and tried to make as realistic as possible for myself to live in and see while also making myself happy often. Here’s one example. I made a joak on Twitter/X and I always check who likes them. First there was some guy who seemed to be a fan of object shows (I was mocking people who are attracted to object show characters in the post (though that was not the punchline at all)). A few seconds later a like showed up by someone who seemed a little bit smarter. Then eventually got liked by someone with a 7/10 rating by Scaruffi. https://www.scaruffi.com/vol8/pragmati.html A few hours ago I saw a video with a girl I liked from 9th grade and well my heart beated fast. It seems fake. Fake moments for fake triumph… I don’t even know many facts about this person anyway. Life seems to be fake. So much deja vu feeling too. I dont know… Well dont think Im sad about it. I guess I am gonna win. Everything seems so fake though. My “enemies” and mostly the enemy version of acquaintances, they are all failing. Many of those people from school, well so many of them look goddamn weird now. Also I never felt regret that I never got to be with the girl who thought I was funny and said it twice. Also theres more proof that she liked me. It’s all so fake, this life. The people at that mental hospital I was in, it was so fake but trying hard to be realistic. There was a scene where I was trying to sleep while girls were singing “Let the bodies hit the floor,” there was a scene where some nonbinary black guy was yelling at the staff for 20 minutes (I dont know why) and a black guy worker was saying “Can’t we just be friends?” Seems fake… There was a friendly cool guy asking me what the medicine tasted like cause I said it was bad. I couldnt describe it and he said it probably tasted bitter because what it is made of is similar to iron or something, well chemistry knowledge… Then the next day I noticed he was not as cool as I thought. Also he forgot my damn name but I didnt care cause he wasnt as cool. There was a black guy who was cool and we watched a cult documentary in the school in the hospital. One of the questions was about what Charlie Manson wanted to do, and the girls in the back who were ending their sentences with the word “chat” (which if you don’t understand why they would do that, they’re acting like they’re on a livestream or something, that’s my impression of it anyway) didn’t know the answer and the cool black guy was yelling “Because he wanted to start a race war!” And nobody even questioned it. Plus an old lady in the room was talking about how one of the Beach Boys knew Charles Manson. The fact that she said “one of” is obviously someone trying to make this dialogue realistic. Not to mention the time she was in the room to observe me and I caught her talking about me to a staff member. That seems fake too. The Indian doctor was so weird and also misunderstood the meaning of one of the questions from a survey that she made me do so I could prove myself not mentally ill. The fact that she misunderstood the meaning of it in such a “trolly” way, it seems fake to me. The question was “Have you ever held beliefs or ideas that seem unusual or irrational to others?” (I found a similar survey on Google Images) And I said no (Which I guess isnt true, but many gamers’s gaming opinions will be treated as irrational too) And she said the meaning of the question is… Man I forgot, but maybe you can figure out a way to misinterpret such a question because it seemed like upper middle tier “trolling,” not elite “trolling.” I say trolling because misinterpreting a sentence in a believable manner is something you do to troll. Anyways the girl I liked from 9th grade is actually 3 years older than me and I never saw her in 10th to 12th grade. Makes sense. So the girl I thought was her was not her and thats good because even if that girl did do a Napoleon impression, its probably based on a Napoleon movie from 2023 that apparently sucks… Also her hoodie that she wore everyday was only decent. Well I got to sleep soon. But anyways life seems not so real. I remember playing Terraria on mobile years before 1.3 came to mobile anyway and for some reason the WiFi was turned off sometimes in the morning and I couldnt play it for some reason when the WiFi was like that. I thought my world was corrupted because I believe it crashed when I tried to enter it. Seems so fake and just to cause conflict. Plus I was at church, and my cousin said his character got corrupted when I said my world got corrupted. He was lying. It all seems like a fake story. I guess Im not God but he is making something fake go on. I’m up for the ride though. Alright the Terraria story might not be the best example of life being fake. But jeez, why does my heart beat fast with this particular girl anyway? I saw a girl on the internet once and my heart didnt beat fast when I saw a picture of her. But when I found out she liked some cool stuff, my heart beat fast when I was playing Slay the Spire while listening to Ommadawn… But also the damn video I saw of the girl I saw in 9th grade, I saw her face in between two people and she was making a weird facial expression. Also its damn strange that I also saw her face as I was walking behind someone and saw her over his shoulder. That was in 9th grade in the hallway right near the library door and she went to the library. I never even went there except for when I was forced to go there. But the point is that the first time I’d ever see this person’s face without a mask is in a weird shot which seems cinematic and also fake for the purposes of making it seem meaningful. Its a graduation day photo slideshow with them walking around a school and outside and I was pressing the 10 seconds forward button so I dont have to wait for the next photo, then I saw who I thought was her and then it changed photos and then I went back 10 seconds and waited to see if it was her. I found out her name and also found only one picture on the internet to prove that the name is hers, because the graduation video only showed the camera from the seat during that part instead of the camera angle of being on the stage and seeing them. But I could tell her hairstyle. The fact there was only one picture is very believable, proof that life is potentially not real or only real to a degree. Well Im not really sad about life being fake. It seems like God is on my side. But is he on the side of many others? I dont know… I hope you cool people are conscious, and also have free will at least to a degree. Also I hope good things for cool people. Life is damn weird. Also I did hear that girl speak sometimes, though its out of context and MIGHT BE A MESSAGE FROM GOD!!!!!! One of them was “Giant running” or something that sounds like that. Also “I think we do” but that was in relation to a question about studying or homework. So what does “Giant running” mean?! I posted on Twitter maybe I’ll get a response from one of Rupert Poopert’s “fans” or one of my “fans.” But could she be saying “Gin and rummy?” Have to sleep now….

So STEM class, that guy who was my STEM partner had a bad idea for a LEGO car when it comes to falling down a ramp speed and now he’s trying to say that schools haven’t prepared us. Well that’s true I guess. But maybe they have prepared us for a WORLD OF PAIN… No they never played that song though. But they did play “Nothing Else Matters” by Metallica and a song from the “Tarzan soundtrack” in gym class, maybe that teacher is Illuminati. My STEM partner (Who made SuperMarioLogan Jeffy grunts all the time) from another year was better at the class than Mr. Smartypants Sociological Genius. Also Mr. SSG (Doesnt stand for super shotgun) hates anime for being weird. And also he doesn’t seem to like gay people. Well there’s two things for you, probably at least one of those is gonna make you MAD…. Jeffy Grunter and I made a bridge out of K’nex that looked horrible and was not symmetrical and had green bendable tubes on the sides of the bridge that don’t do anything for our bridge, they were just decoration, we finished the final test on maybe the first day with the dumbest bridge. Also the girl who called me funny twice was in that class and claimed to have roasted some male. Well I don’t remember the roast. But eh seems like it is believable that she became anti-male (Which I found out yesterday) and that is one situation of which proves.. But anyway who cares about this…

Alright so Napoleon, is it actually cool to do a Napoleon impression in the school hallways like I claimed? Maybe not, because one of the gamers with the worst gaming opinions has two Napoleon movies in his top 4 on Letterboxd. And they are artistic and old films, Napoleon the silent film, and The Duellists. This guy listens to new music (Also his favorite Pink Floyd album is The Wall) and heavily favors newer games, he only likes action games (And not even good ones. He likes parrying games mainly) But yeah lets just say this guy tainted Napoleon’s reputation.

So I did find facts about the Asian kid who I said we have a weird relationship. Well this guy apparently likes Kpop and calls himself a Stan and also he plays Roblox and weird games on it. Yeah this is just damn weird. I dont really get it because this guy was friends with a lot of people including a maybe Pakistani guy who was refusing to read an article about LGBTQ people during health class. That class’s students were damn weird and they were all hating the teacher for some reason including one left wing girl who calling a teacher who called the health teacher to get her to go to her class, she called her a bitch. I thought the health teacher was cool. He wasnt acting gay at all if thats what you think he is. Fine I guess I wouldnt like that class if I had to talk and got randomly called on like everyone else did. But I just never talked there and BOOM, never got called on because they think I have problems. (Maybe I do, it all started when a dumb girl said I wasnt funny in Kindergarten even though the joke was multidimensional layered! “What if a Goldfish saw my mouth and thought it was a cave?”)

Mortis The Vanquisher Chapter 1 First Day of College (I dont recommend reading this story, I quit writing it. Its not funny enough for me)

This part was written August 23 2025 Fiesty vestibules of college. Enter the C.R.A.P. That stands for Coupon Rhe Adiot People!!! Yeah, that’s a puzzle for you to solve the meaning of. I am Mortis The Vanquisher. I beat the game Braid in less than 1 hour on my first try. Getting all the puzzle pieces is what that means, you beater. I’m a soul brotha, biatch. Yeah that’s right punk. I said biatch. What you gonna do about it? You gonna go fook a mammal with youmselves corporealness showcasing teary eyes? Fiesty… AND DICEY!!! Discorporate from that!!! It’s my first day, woo yay. I see a bluejay. Or is that just my imagination? Einstein says imagination is more important than knowledge. Well this bluejay is more important than anything that these fiesty freaks will ever spout in my face, they know their people are calling them a disgrace all over the place because of what they have on their face face face face face, face face face face face. That’s me rapping anyway biatch, and no I don’t listen to hip hop. But I make my own electronic musique concrete avant-garde progressive rock with the occasional hip hop verse. Fiesty ones, if you don’t know what one of those words means, go suck like a snake. There’s a bunch of Dick and Horties to suck. And they want to suck too. They all suck. Wooooo. I’m a ghost. Wooooo. Oh look, some puffy haired teacher biatch. “Hi, cool hat! My name is Miss Morgan. Do you need help on where to go?” said Miss Morgan. Uh… How about NO. This is a metroidvania now. Or is it a metroidbrainia now? If I get help on where to go, it’s a goddamn disease. And what kind of disease is it? A brain tumor because you just go around shouting all the answers. I must go to go and have to have and do the power of do the go and have to figure it all out by myself. And no, I’m not talking out loud to all you journal readers. I’m writing in my journal while ignoring this person while I write. “Hey, do you speak English?” said Miss Morgan. I should have memorized some words from a different language. But hey I can fake a language no problem. I know the fundamentals of making an original language. “Yuzaki hagani splintis English.” said me. “Oh, cool language. You can’t understand me but I wonder what you’re doing here if you don’t speak English.. Hmm, I wonder for what reason could this person be here doing for? WAIT! HE’S A DOMESTIC TERRORIST!!!” said Miss Morgan. No I’m not. Argh some paranoid person. But I am not dropping the facade. And I have blood on my face, and this is what makes this person think I am a disgrace. I have gotten into combat with a woman of woe because she wanted to do me. I had to tell her that fighting is more tactical of a physical action activity that can be done with thine corporeal. This woman had a knife and did not fight honorably like a samurai of fist stations. Domestic terrorist I have been labeled, for my supposed invasion of a college. But it was thine parent who shone upon thee with the expectation of emotion-based supposed logic and thine disgracefulness was to be graced upon my soul if I did not extract the teachings in which case, there shall be beatings anew like a garden that grew thanks to birds that flew. Innumerable shrines of puffy haired haggards of haggitry have spawned in the nation. These shrines look like a place where you and me spent most of our time. But fine, we shall sigh. Like a sky that we cry. Doodle die. And my. Blue fly. Woo yiy. Doo nigh. Boo guy. Woo figh. July. Zoo bye. Goo pie. But those shrines are where the ones calling me a domestic terrorist have been raised. They think I have a bomb and am gonna bomb this college. Go on, and combine those two words as it is what you are. Not you, reader unless this shrew happens to steal my journal. I once knew a boy named Bobby Blue who said it grew inside a shrew. Perhaps it was this shrew. Oh wait, he said the shrew died after it happened. Well, this is not gardening. It’s what you expect from college. How old am I? A mere age of 18. College here is something new. Security comes. “What language do you speak?” He said, that security guard who was wearing black bulletproof vest instead of blue. What a goofoon. Then he presumably asked the same question in various languages and it seems he memorized the phrase in every language. Probably being a god damn sex fan is the reason why he knows this phrase in every language. Time to drop it. “I am no domestic terrorist. I just want to learn. Can’t I learn? I am sooooo dumb. Let me learn from these geniuses!” said mwah. “You can’t just go around not speaking English in front of this innocent teacher,” said the security guard. This part was written September 20 2025 “I am Mortis The Vanquisher!!!! I DO WHAT I WANT. I DO WHAT I CAN. I AM A MAN!!! I AM A HERO AND I HOPE THAT I’M NOT DAMNED!!!! FOOK YOU!!! Stupid haggard biatch. I am a gangster if you didn’t know. But you can’t arrest me for that because I never killed anybody. Hahaha and nobody in my gang killed anybody either. So we’re an innocent gang. But the fact that I am in a gang MEANS YOU SHOULD BE SCARED OF ME!” said me in my imagination. That’s what I wish I said right now but I didn’t say it. I’m too genius to say silly stuff like that, it’s gonna get me in a worse situation than the funniness of the reaction. “What are you even writing? Dude, you aren’t spelling feisty right. The first word I see on your journal is you spelling the word feisty wrong.” said Miss Morgan. “Well I’ll have you know that NOBODY EVER TOLD ME HOW TO WRITE THE WORD FEISTY BECAUSE NOBODY SAID IT IN FRONT OF ME. In fact the fact that you know how to spell the word feisty makes me assume that you’ve been acting inappropriate in some GOD DAMN CHATS ON THE INTERNET.” said mwah. Then she started crying. Probably because TOO MUCH TRUTH HAS BEEN SPOKEN TO POWER! “Dude, back off. You need to let that woman do whatever she wants on the internet. It’s a free country. You look like you’re from Asia or something. That isn’t how we do things in America, buddy.” said the security guard. Little does this idiot know, I’m an alien from another planet. That is why I am so much smarter than this pathetique race of humans known as humans. Oh, I didn’t plan that sentence out so well thought out. Listen, I am multitasking in my brain doing thousands of calculations while writing this. The only reason I am writing this is because I need a god damn girlfriend and this will help me get a girlfriend because you need stories to tell them to keep them entertained. How about my first day of college? Well that’s today and this is gonna be a great story so I have to write it to REMEMBER IT. And yes, my alien family has given me a human body so I CAN bang the human. My alien race isn’t that attractive. The reason why is because we are a warrior race and we are designed to look scary. I didn’t want to be a member of a warrior race, I wanted to be a warrior and an intellectual in a race of non-warriors and non-intellectuals. That’s how I became human. If everyone is a warrior, NO ONE IS… All that stuff I just said, that’s probably what my PhD is gonna be about. It’s a hard life being a genius. I thought I’d be so beloved for being a genius of multitude faceted genius powers. But alas, none such ideals is the case. This security guard is getting angry at me, look at his face, he looks like he’s gonna bark. “WHAT ARE YOU WRITING?!!!!” said the security guard. “Shut up you anal hound.” said mwah in my imagination. “SUYAH!” said mwah. “What is that? Some kind of tribal chant? Well I admire your culture. But I think it’s best we act a little more normal here.” said the security guard. “And why don’t you get to class?” He ADDED! Fine, I will. But I’m not gonna say that out loud. Alright time to go. Written on September 21 2025 Na na na na na. Look at this professor. He looks not as smart as mwah. But who cares, let’s see what he’s saying. “It’s a goddamn disaster that Keffrey Coogis is president. He banged a stripper and gave her AIDS and she died. Keffrey Coogis carries AIDS but is immune to dying of AIDS because of his billionaire injected antivirus. He said the stripper was a 6.5/10 so he doesn’t care about the loss. Why is this the fate of our nation? He is a morally wrong man! And I can critique his politics too, not just his character. He loves aliens. Fuck that, I fucking hate aliens because they are of an inferior culture most likely. I doubt any alien could come up with something as good as my favorite TV show which is surreal and life changing. I will not share the name of the show because it is not school appropriate. Fuck the president for not allowing me to name this TV show’s name. The policies he has done to colleges is against the first amendment. Fine, I’ll say the TV show’s name. Fuck that. I’m a punk. I was a punk during the 1980s. I still have that spirit. I am gonna do it. The show’s name is Dildo Swamp. If any of you tell on me for saying the name of this TV show, you are going to get on my enemy list and I tell you, I have a fanbase so you will be targeted. My fanbase is due to my literature analysis on the internet which you can find at the website that is on the whiteboard. Dildo Swamp is a show that no alien could surpass the genius of. Their culture must be inferior to ours. And I say that with 100% certainty. The show has a genius joke in it that goes like this, ‘What do you call a bitch that smokes weed?’ And the main protagonist Richie says ‘Weedie.’ which is a joke that is a pun because it rhymes with sweetie. So he is telling the person who hates the so-called bitch who smokes weed that he would consider her a sweetie. Isn’t that the most clever comeback ever? Apparently the writer Hankie Johnson came up with that comeback in a dream. I bet aliens don’t even dream, how inferior they must be. Haha. Richie is the genius of our times and he is the best character and my life inspiration. Keffrey Coogis should die. He makes me ashamed of being a fan of sexual intercourse. He will die soon but it isn’t soon enough. When will this torment end? He apparently does the 69 position, I DO THE 69 POSITION. I am never doing that position ever again. He probably only satisfies the ladies pink circle which I say because they limit my language and I already broke the rule already and you know what I mean but the pink circle, he only satisfies it so he can look good and get big boy points. Fuck that. I do it because I am a good fucking human being. He probably has bad tongue control too.” says Professor Yeapon. Uh… This isn’t politics class. Why is this guy rambling about politics during English class. Mortis is displeased! Man, these people think it is acceptable to make fun of alien culture because it has been found out that my species which is from the nearest planet, the Ikolats, are a warrior race. Little do they know I am more intellectual than any of these feisty haggard male hags… Screw it, I’m gonna fight the power. Written on September 22 2025 Uh I’m too afraid to fight the power. I’m gonna go sneak up behind his desk and see the picture of his family. Let’s see how cool looking they are and see if this guy is a guy I should be imitating. Hmm… Doesn’t look cool. “What are you doing sir? Do you have an announcement for the class, young man?” asked Professor Yeapon whose hair is braided and braindead! “Mortis is I. Seeker of cool is the spirit of soulio in my soul brotha hood. Mortistician of green bean sewage, was so dearly far as a nickel, so damn living. I am a better version of you Professor Yeapon. I should teach the class!” exclaimed mwah. “Oh really? Teach the class now. Let’s see your genius. Or will it be an embarrassment for the ages? This shall go down in history! And I will change my job to history professor!” jizzed Professor Yeapon. “Ok, so it looks like Dildo Swamp novelization is what is this teacher worked so hard to be allowed to teach. Though it is called Toy Swamp on the covers because the government won’t let you read the real thing in school. But this is disrespectful to children who play with toys in more interesting ways than you degenerates who play with toys like an idiot varmint just shoving it up your anus over and over again. Is that really genius? I think NOT. DILDO SWAMP IS THE WORST BOOK EVER. AND YOU WANNA KNOW WHY?! BECAUSE… LET’S FLIP TO A RANDOM PAGE. Oh IS THAT A GODDAMN TEENAGE PREGNANT GIRL WHINING ABOUT BUTT SIZES. Screw that, SCREW THIS BOOK AND SCREW THE TV SHOW IT IS BASED ON. It is not insightful OR funny. Ok? You wanna know a good joak? I’ll tell you a good joak. NO, YOU DON’T DESERVE A GOOD JOAK. BUT FINE, I WILL GIVE YOU ONE IN THREE, TWO, ONE! Why did the boombox called Boombox 4000 have a sticker of a baby on it? Because the Boombox 3000 killed that baby. Hahaha. Isn’t that funny? No, it wasn’t but I got you laughing. I know how to mesmerize the crowd. Unlike Mr. Fartypants. Right? Am I right people? Oh that’s not his name, it’s Yeapon right? Oh you know they were calling me a domestic terrorist, but what about this guy? His name is almost Weapon! What kind of a weapon is he. Is he going to go around on his toes bending over and boom he uses some hair gel and makes his hair very pointed and presumably sharp and then he charges at you with a rhino? What a weapon. Jeez, and this book Dildo Swamp. I tell you, let’s read it from the first page, shall we?” Said mwah. The crowd laughed so much at my simple minded jokes, what a bunch of country bumpkins who are those known as a simple man and woman. I am glad to amuse the country bumpkins. Oh wait, country bumpkins don’t go to college. Well I am not up to be the king of the stereotyping masters zone. I read the book out loud, no time to write in my journal then. It was about this 33 year old man named Richie who kept getting teleported to a dildo swamp for an hour a day and he became gay because he wanted something to do at the swamp when he was teleported there instead of just ignoring the dildos. And he has a teenage daughter who is pregnant at age 16 who stole the dildos he pocketed. It’s a crime story, where he has to figure out who stole the dildos. Well this book and TV show sucks. It’s trying to be surreal but the swamp isn’t interesting enough of a location and all there is are dildos and it’s the same damn color dildo and same shape. And the story tries too hard at being relatable, I’M A GOD DAMN GENIUS, NOT A SIMPLE MINDED CITY SLACKER. Did they ever beat Braid in less than 1 hour on their first playthrough without searching anything up? No? Well guess what, I’m in the bed of a girl who loves me right now because I did such a good job annhilating that teacher’s GOD DAMN LESSON PLAN. I’m not the kind of guy to make Professor Yeapon watch me bang. He probably won’t get jealous anyway which is good because he seems to be a decent guy so he better be decent and not get jealous over stupid stuff. This girl is a 8.5/10 usually but a 10/10 occasionally which is good but I kinda want to wait for brain modifications that let me see her as 10/10 all the time because I can’t really deal with this ZHAMASHURA BUSINESS. Zhamashura is the principle of the religion known as Zum that the Ikolats’ planet’s culture is known for. It is the idea of settling for something that is good enough but not the best. I didn’t really like that belief system because I am a god damn vanquisher, not a settler. But they had to believe that in Ikolatia, because being a warrior race and all, you don’t always get the best food everyday. Some people just spent too much time in the sun and their skin doesn’t taste as good. Oh yeah did I mention that humans are an animal that exist on the Ikolat planet? They’re just living as livestock and the way they live, they are pretty much the dolphin cow hybrid of Ikolatia but sometimes they go in a teepee. Even being a warrior race, the average Ikolat is smarter than most humans. The girl whose bed I am in is named Junia. She has green hair. This part was written September 23 2025 So I banged this green hair girl Junia. Was it worth it? Well I am a believer in the idea that you can regain your virginity. But I am a vanquisher anyway, so I guess this is what I must do to vanquish and flourish. It’s no secret that sexual intercourse is pro-war. We want to conquer the world. But alas, it is not so fun to conquer the world unless you know plastic surgery. And plastic surgery is just an umbrella term for modifying a person’s face, doesn’t necessarily mean using plastic. Oh the term cosmetic surgery exists, says Junia to me. Well that term sounds too girly for me. Plastic is a material that non-girly miners had to mine for and forge with the blessing of being a blacksmith. But I must learn how to modify people’s faces because most aren’t appealing enough for a vanquisher. Although this seems to be a problem, who really cares. It’s tough being a vanquisher and an intellectual at the same time. But who really cares exactly. It is thine line of pine that makes the lassies scream… They look at the snake and suck like a snake… But why? They are not intellectual enough. Don’t they realize that this hexery is only for the sake of war? If sexual intercourse did not exist, there would be no war. It’s as simple as that. But because it exists, we bask in the glory of war. But alas, war is filled with too many people just going around not fighting with the most high-tech weaponry. Fighting with your simple sword or gun, it is pathetique compared to what I have forged in my smithy. A shieldio swordio that is held with a handle that you spin to spin thy blade. With thine blade, thy holy ones can see the power of light. One hand to hold the shield sword hybrid weapon. One hand to snap your fingers to the melody of a fateful hymn. I am bald, but this is to make me look more friendly. I look like a baby. People love babies but hate them too. But would they hate a baby that is giant? Don’t you see? This is the victorious powerful idea. I have turned away my journal from Junia. I am sitting on the bottom bunk bed instead of the top one. I am black or Indian or whatever dark skinned race exists, I am an alien with dark skin as my disguise. I guess this is living life with difficulty. But I see no pain, I look like a baby and everyone knows that they would cry if a baby who can speak words were to die. “HEY YOU BANGED MY JUNIA. YOU’RE GONNA DIE.” said a guy who just walked in with thine buzzcut hairdo. “Not this guy again.” said Junia. Damn it, the vestibule of the school had a sign that said no weapons. But this guy has a knife! Not fair, of course the one who wants to carry a giant high-tech weapon gets punished but thy one who wants to use a weapon they have not even forged themselves gets to win the fight. Unfair, unfair. “Get out of here Friederick!” says Junia to the buzzcut man. Argh, let me do my backflip kick attack. Boom. I did it, but oh man I missed and kicked the air because I was too busy writing this while doing it. I am an alien you know so I can do this kind of stuff. But everyone in the room thinks I’m scribbling and not writing with precision and accuracy. “Shank shank shank!” says Friederick. I got slashed once. Junia already left the dorm to go to the pool that is outside of the door that takes you outside! Time to use this haggard drowned lady as a weapon. Boom. I pick her up from the pool and boom, watch me throw her in the face of Friederick. “You shall pay, you little twat.” said Friederick and Junia at the same time. It was like they were both possessed by a spirit. Perhaps that is the voice of their dead human soulmates who lived on Ikolatia, who lived like a dolphin cow hybrid their whole life when they could have done so much more. Or perhaps Friederick is a music producer who had a voice modulator that changes the pitch of his voice and he turned it on to make it seem like Junia said the same thing and the device returned what he said in the girly voice but what he said with his real voice was said by his real voice! So many possibilities, a puzzle for the ages. And now people are getting angry at me for violence against women even though I was not hurting her out of malice, I was just using her as a weapon for my safety and because I wanted a high-tech weapon. The nearest male that I could use as a weapon is too far away, and not even in the pool. I wanted someone who was in the pool so I could aggravate Friederick by making thine clothes wet. This part was written September 24 2025 Friederick is angered, but at least he is close to the girl he loves. I gotta help Friederick get with this girl if I want him to stop this threat against mein Leben. They’re both bleeding so maybe they could become blood brothers. Sounds cool, my work is done. I backflip into the pool. The girls in the pool aren’t cheering. Come on, I was being considerate by making sure I didn’t bang my head or other body parts against the ladies in the pool. My hard knocking precision of dodgery is scolded by these ladies, who are, I feel are soon to be grandmothers. Friederick isn’t jumping in the pool. He is staying next to the girl he loves as they are stuck on the floor. I guess he isn’t angry at the wetness of his clothes. Perhaps he can imagine it is of Junia’s bodily fluids. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Screw this blastery. I must go down to my next class. I see Professor Yeapon in the hall. He left the class earlier when he learnt that people enjoyed my teachings more than he. “You know they were laughing at you, not laughing with you,” said Professor Yeapon. “Then explain the line for my line,” said mwah. “There was no group of groupies, ONLY ONE POOPIE!” said Professor Yeapon. “It is true.. Only that Junia was asking for a banging. It kills my soul to know that the vanquisher known as mwah, was not so loved by the masses and thought about during their masses, not that they go to masses, they should go to masses of Zum,” said mwah. “Shut up about Ikolat culture. The fact that there isn’t a big atheist population in Ikolatia proves they are not as smart as humans. I don’t know what your fascination with these degenerates is,” said Professor Yeapon. “Sounds like someone is angered by the fact that humans are livestock on that planet,” said mwah. “One day there will be a human revolution so great on that planet. Consider me a prophet,” said Professor Yeapon. “Keep on rambling, grey haired male hag… For I must go to class!” said mwah. “I will come with you, as I took a half day today. I will come to every class you have and see how much better of a teacher I am than your others,” said Professor Yeapon. “Thy will be done…” said mwah. It is a class of 135 students. Yeapon’s was 154. I am so intelligent that I can look at a bunch of objects and know the amount without counting. This part was written on October 3 2025 “Wake up!” said Yeapon. Oh crap, I snoozed before I even took a seat. The teacher is threatening to pants me, sounds like she’s trying to be funny. I am so good at sleeping that I can sleep standing up. Fuck this bullcrud bollocks… I can’t believe this. Everybody is mad at me for standing here like this. What could I do? What is this to be? I philosophize the state of affairs that occurred from me standing up in the middle of the class and snoozing. I don’t snore like some hacky shit balls. I hope a girl liked the fact I was sleeping and thought I looked cool with my eyes closed. If they do, perhaps I could vanquish. But I’m tired of vanquishing in that way. There’s better ways to vanquish than that. I need to take over a country. Nobody is alive in this world, with all these phony drivers going around whining about me standing in them middle of the class holding up the class hostage. Damn this. And half the girls in the class didn’t even get to look at my snooze face because my back is turned to them. And the other half, they would have to turn around their head to see my snoozing face. How unfair it is, how am I supposed to find love in this world if nobody can see my snoozing face so easily. This is a travesty and must be fixed in this world. Perhaps with a system that has a mirror of your face on the back of your head, perhaps that would be a solution. I would like to tinker to make it work. But obviously people are going to treat me like some crazy hippie if I do something like that. With tattoos of green beans on my face… Fuck this BULL CRUD!!!!! “Sit the fuck down you little shit.” said Professor Gigula whomst’vest is thy of the female kind. Argh, where do these people think they can go around calling me names like this. I’m sitting now. Next to Yeapon who saved me a seat. “We are learning about science,” said Professor Gigula. “Why? Because… This is fucking science class. And what kind of science? Chemistry, bitch. I bet you males in this class don’t have good chemistry with the females you like,” added Gigula. Argh, why don’t we have respectable teachers who aren’t acting annoying? Yeapon says “This lady annoys me. The reason why is simple. She probably listens to bad music yet acts like a gangster’s ho,” I say “Whatever… I just want to do some vanquishing,” Yeapon says “Whatever that means… And you wanna know something? This lady rejected me when I asked to bang. Dang choosy one,” I say “Well I could seduce her better than you. Not that I would want to because she isn’t attractive to me,” Yeapon says “You’re a choosy one too, damn it. She ain’t look half bad…” Gigula says “WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! Have you been listening?! Tell me what I said, sleeper boy.” She has been rambling for a while. I say “I don’t know, sorry.” Gigula says “THAT’S NOT WHAT I SAID. I said that chemistry is the lifeblood of everything in the universe.” Ok… “You’re not handsome enough to be ignoring my class.” said Gigula. “Damn it… Why isn’t there a council that decides who is objectively attractive? Because I am better looking than YOU!” said mwah. “You’re gay!” said Gigula. “Yeapon was right. You act like a gangster’s ho. Go back to the streets and get up in them. Thine unholy ones must be Zumified… I bask my head in the water of my water bucket that I drink from… For one reason… To remember what it was like to live in the glory days OF THE FUTURE!!! When I was 84 years old! That is written history of the future! I see the future… And I know you will remain one who gets insulted by the gangsters for acting in ways they fine and find unacceptable.. What’s wrong with gay anyway, hey! It’s pretty much the same thing if they have long hair. Well not from their perspective… But from mine… But in the future I will be sticking my head up in the new alien creatures found beheaded and stick my head in their torso with the water that fills up their body. And the blood mixes… A tasty drink. This water bucket does not taste like it, but I can imagine it does… I will enjoy the future. You will never enjoy anything as it seems you are JUST A GOD DAMN NON-VANQUISHER. And the vanquishers won’t be vanquishing you. But they will be vanquishing your country. Which will be turned into a land of days back to the tribal days. Where we can see the tribes and learn from them. We can’t learn from you but we can learn from a Native American tribe living in the woods today. For they have many lessons. But you are filled with no lessons but only chest ins that leads to questions. In your chest, we open it up to find what treasure? Just the treasure of a dead baby who you didn’t care to remove from your body because you think it makes you look cooler to have more stuff inside you and the plop sound the dead baby inside you makes when you bounce, it really sounds like what warriors heard in the old days of many planets. An old glory that is to be remembered, and treasured unlike how you treated the treasure inside you. You killed that baby… I know the smell. For I have been the witness of many dead babies in my early days at 2 months old.” said mwah. “I am insulted by your statements. Also nobody can remember what happened at 2 months old. That’s a scientific fact.” said Gigula. I can’t reveal that I am an alien just yet… It must be done at the perfect time which is very long from now… “You don’t know what I KNOW!!!!” said mwah. Yeapon says out loud to the whole class, “Let’s have a drink everybody. For this, be a mighty duel of the wits,” and he clunk two drinks of whiskey against each other and smoked some weed from a bong that looks like merchandise from his favorite TV show. “Come get out your rapier,” said mwah. “I don’t HAVE a rapier,” said Gigula. “Well, do you have any high-tech weapons if you’re a scientist?” said mwah. “I’m a science TEACHER, not a scientist. And I don’t condone violence. He said duel of the WITS, not duel of violence,” said Gigula. “Then say something witty, and realize combat is witty if done with high-tech weapons that are hard to control,” said mwah. “This dead baby inside me, he died of natural causes. I never cared to get him out of me. But isn’t it loving to have a corpse around you at all times?” said Gigula. “You’re telling me, why do you need my approval?!” said mwah. “Back the fuck down. I’ll get Roger to shoot you,” said Gigula. “So now we are talking violence huh? Looks like I have won, and I bet the gun this Roger has is probably not even high-tech,” said mwah. Looks like some girls are walking up to me. This part was written on October 4 2025 “Kiss kiss?” said a girl to me. “Ok…” said mwah. “You people HAVE BAD CHEMISTRY!!!!” said Gigula. “What do you mean, ‘YOU PEOPLE?!’ Is it because my skin is dark?!” said mwah. “Shut up. I hate this god damn world. Roger fucked my life over when he knocked me up. He is the one who shot the baby inside me because I said it kicked me. Having this baby inside me had given me a brain tumor because the brain of the baby travelled inside of my head when I threw up from eating stromboli. I hate you kids. Roger is the one who told me to become a chemistry professor. He told me this because he wanted to roleplay at night and he liked his chemistry professor back in the days. I had a brain tumor and it fucked me over. I used my chemistry knowledge to drink a medicine I made. It worked a little bit but only a little bit. Fuck this shit. I want to fly to Ikolatia and become one of those goddamn livestock. With my brain wiped of course. Perhaps I could have had a better life if I was living there. There is nothing for me here. Just a bunch of people I hate… Nobody is like me. Everybody is just a bitch.” said Gigula. And this is what happens to you if you are a non-gamer… This is the life of a non-gamer right here. Pfft. I won’t tell her about the true medicine which is gaming. Wanna know my favorite game? It is called Thyoi. And it is an Ikolatian game which has been imported to this planet and I was so glad to play it 2 years ago when Ikolatia was finally discovered by Earthians and they went on a mission to meet each other. It didn’t go so well but they stole a bunch of games from the planet and made it compatible with our computers. Thyoi is such a genius game because it is a 3D brawler where you use high-tech weapons and counter-hit some cunts and fuck em up with the power of the majesty. And you know it has the best enemy design and it also has an open world that has interesting combat encounters all around the map. And every weapon is like playing a different game when you use it. Oh yeah and who could forget the highly philosophical story. The Ikolats are truly geniuses. This part was written on October 9 2025 “George W. Bush is visiting the school!” said a man on the intercoms. “Fuck that ho.” said Gigula. “What’s wrong with him? Even I, as a staunch diggabul, have no problems with this guy.” said Yeapon. “Don’t talk to me, disgusting fuck…” said Gigula with spit. Oh yeah, did I mention what Gigula’s body mass is? It’s fat but not that fat really. Well, no offense. Don’t be offended by that one. Overweight a little bit. There, is that nicer? I don’t mean to offend. But I think it’s important I describe the appearances of people. Yeapon is skinny but not too skinny. And me, I’m skinny but not too skinny too. “Hello kids. I needed to see my booty call.” said George W. Bush. “Go away. I hate you.” said Gigula. “Huh? What did I do? I know it’s been years. But damn it. You’re my daughter in law. And well, I need…” said George W. Bush but he was interrupted by Yeapon who is saying “This makes no sense. Why are you calling her your booty call if she is your daughter in law. Lemon zest, don’t commit incest!” George W. Bush says “She isn’t the booty call I’m talking about. It’s a small world after all. I know her, but I’m here to meet that swampy lady who got my rocks off in the jungle.” said George W. Bush. Oh crap I wrote that sentence wrong. Well I’m not erasing. Because I don’t have an eraser on my pencil. I made it a double-sided pencil by sharpening where the eraser should be. Yeah there’s metal in the sharpener that is at my house. Mom will get mad but we’re not meeting her for years, she’ll cool down. “Is that swamp by any chance a Dildo Swamp?” said Yeapon who loved to mention his favorite TV show just because this guy said swampy even though he was talking about the jungle, but using swampy as an adjective probably meaning the girl was sticky or something. “Why are you talking about gay stuff in my presence? Where’s Sally?!” said George W. Bush. I guess he doesn’t know that that is the name of a TV show. “Sally here. Yoooo, it’s Mr. Bush!” said presumably a girl named Sally. “Sally, I got to talk to my daughter in law first. But soon we’re going to YOUR DORM!!! Let’s do our handshake!” said George W. Bush. Oh gadzooks… Why is George W. Bush acting so crazy. I’m gonna give him a head rub just to be funny. Wha? “You are on my kill list. You ruined my plans.” said the man who is wearing a black SWAT helmet underneath the George W. Bush lifelike mask that I pulled off on accident. Fuck… Mortis is in danger. “You’re not Mr. Bush…” said Sally. “Fuck… I’m better than Mr. Bush though. Come on, let’s go.” said SWAT man. “No…” said Sally who was crying. “Ugh. I’m the man you met in the jungle. I’m the man who encouraged you to go to this great college. I just was disguised as George W. Bush because… Well… I… Fuck… Don’t take this against me. I’m a deeply troubled man. I’m disturbed!” said SWAT man. “I don’t like disturbed people. They freak me out. I want to be with Mr. Bush!” said Sally. “But MR. BUSH NEVER KNEW YOU.” said SWAT man. Oh jeebers… This is one freaky thing to see. Sally is crying so badly. SWAT man has his mouth showing under his helmet but his eyes are not visible with the helmet on. He’s grinning and licking his tears. SWAT man ran away. What a scary sight. It’s pathetique… Sally that is… SWAT man seemed cool. Maybe it’s just his helmet that made him seem so cool. But hey, why doesn’t she appreciate the coolness?! But I hope his threats of violence towards me are not going to happen. Maybe this guy will be my greatest enemy. The duel of the ages will come. Oh is it weird to imagine a random guy as my arch enemy… Well I don’t have an eraser. And like the musique concrete rapper Cray Cray Bootis says, fuck all you people reading my suicide note. But uh, this isn’t a suicide note. It’s just a journal. And Cray Cray Bootis is still alive anyway for all of you not into the musique concrete rapping scene, which I am not really into either but I know about it. I’m more into musique concrete with occasional rap verses. Not full-on rap verses all the time. Ok? This part was written October 30 2025 Cray Cray Bootis pretended to commit suicide because it was the in-thing to do in the musique concrete hip hop scene. But he’s the one that started it. But it’s just an avant-garde expression and an excuse to write a suicide note without committing suicide. It’s true artistry. And if you don’t get it… Well stick to your rappers who rap to a rhythm. Damn… Well I know what you’re thinking. There’s no way anything I wrote in this journal could be true. Life is absurd but not that absurd, you say. I’m faking everything I write huh? I’m not. I knew college was like this… I had to see it for myself. I was in my laboratory a week ago when I decided to make a crystal ball out of rotary engines. That’s how I learned about college and how I found out how bad it is. It’s a freaking farnickle… I just want to… I don’t know. I feel like everybody hates me. I’m so HATED!!!! I am not loved in this world… It is so lonely being the only Ikolat I know in my life. All these shallow girls loving me and kissing me… Who even cares. I don’t even care if one of them had the coolest hairstyle in the world. They wouldn’t be half as good as they would be in heaven which would be a sandbox where you could just make anything you want. But how about the Ikolats on Ikolatia… Would I like any of them? Well yes if they were cool… But I know I am just a peasant on Ikolatia. I had to go here to be a jenius. It’s lonesome being a jenius here and it is horrible knowing I’m just a peasant there. Nothing we accomplish even matters… It’s all crap compared to the most superior alien species… Ikolats probably aren’t even in the top 100 best. It’s a god damn FARNICKLE… And I don’t know what to do. Yeapon is alongside me for today… But he isn’t the most ideal friend… He is just a god damn weird guy who is too into politics… I hate politics… Those people aren’t creative at all with politics. Damn it, what’s the point of talking politics if you’re not gonna bring anything new to the table. Same old bullcrap with no innovation… It’s not high-tech. All these politicians… Nothing they do even matters. And they’re famous for what? They’re humans and humans are no heroes. Ikolatian politics is better. The way it works there is the god damn way of warriorness. If you’re caught acting any way not like a vanquisher, you can go to another planet and just live there as a disguised Ikolat. I reckon most Ikolats who went to other planets forgot all about their Ikolat background. That’s probably because they went to a superior alien planet. I went to an inferior alien planet. If you’re caught acting like a vanquisher who doesn’t get why being a vanquisher is good, your body is given to a kid who can put their brain in your body and do a better job with your strength. Never liked the idea of getting stronger by holding weights, that’s why I’m skinny. It’s just a god damn bad system. In Ikolatia, you get stronger by fighting your crops. The crops on that planet are living things and they will fight you. It wasn’t always that way. But with their genius political system, it really works. You wouldn’t die to the crops but they could really give you a psychedelic headache. But it’s not psychedelic enough of a headache for people to be logically wasting time trying to get the high. But the reason why you should be a vanquisher and why it is good to be a vanquisher… It’s because you have to realize… Fighting with high-tech weapons is a puzzle of the highest intellectual layer. It wasn’t always that way. We were vanquishers without purpose before. We vanquished for no reason. But we found that with high-tech weapons, vanquishing can become a game of the ultimate strategic and thinking layers. It is intellectual, and the smartest thing you can do. But I know what you’re thinking, were the politicians who made the system vanquishers and did they do this in their spare time? Well that was the intellectual movement of the past. They saw that vanquishing was pointless before the creation of high-tech weapons that are hard to use. But with the inventions of high-techness, there was the greatest discovery. What they’ve been doing was just a pointless version of the ultimate thing to be doing. But I know what you’re thinking, is banging vanquishing? Well… It really isn’t except for the purpose of extending your lifespan. Ikolat’s lifespan increase if they bang a lot. And I know what you’re thinking, damn it people who look good get to live long. But here’s the catch, you have to truly enjoy the banging on a high level and you can’t be stressed while doing it. So there comes the only time when Ikolats decorate. They do plastic surgery which is an umbrella term for sculpting their body, and not using actual plastic on people. They go mining and fight the minerals, they put a gem that is the equivalent of diamonds on Earth in the person’s skin. It fixes the lighting of their face and they will never look ugly in any lighting. It’s great. Ikolats have teal skin and can be born with any color of hair. There are more colors in Ikolats’ perception so don’t be alarmed if you think that dyed hair people look unattractive on Earth. The colors Ikolats can see are much more beautiful. And you know what, I don’t even care if Ikolats aren’t in the top 100. We’ve got a good life and it’s good enough for me. If our planet is to be vanquished, so be it. I know there are Ikolats who can vanquish more of the world and bring a world of new Ikolats. I wonder if there is a perk that Ikolats have that they have better than any other race. I pray there is… And I’m afraid to know if there is or not… And anyway… Many Ikolats go to superior alien planets and try to live there. The disguises do not necessarily work but many planets don’t mind. And what about the game developers of Ikolatia, are they vanquishers? Well… They made those games in their spare time. They play them in their spare time. It’s not like they’re going up the mountains and spying on other planets with high-tech far reaching binoculars looking for a juicy high-tech enslavement all day long. And yeah… Ikolatia is the only alien planet that Earth knows. No wonder why no Ikolats wanted to be here. They wouldn’t want to be suspected. Is Ikolatia responsible for any war crimes?! Hell no. Except for one that shouldn’t even be considered a war crime. And that’s the damn fact that they dance after a victory. I guess these superior alien planets don’t have the tribalness in them of a Zumbo ceremonial dance. Well I like the dance… It’s probably the most attractive poses you can do mixed together into one great showcase. Perhaps that is one perk of being an Ikolat…

Naga Tales: The Story of Cray Cray Bootis and Sancho

Chapter 1 Before The Storm

Written November 8 2025

Pfft. I wanna poop in your thyroid. I don’t care if you have hypothyroid or hyperthyroid. Poop in it, it’s the way to go. Oh, did I startle you? I am Cray Cray Bootis, the world’s greatest rapper. I hate god damn nosy people reading my suicide note. Yeah this is a suicide note. Fuck all you hos reading my suicide note. I mean it. I’ve had it with this world. I can’t poop in a thyroid. I wanna poop in a thyroid of a girl who looks like a dog mixed with a hyena mixed with 5 humans for good measure. Because we don’t want too many animal DNA in there, you know what I’m saying? Shit, nobody knows what I’m saying. And you know what, fuck those hos. I’m leaving them behind anyway. I’ve got a home planet to voyage onward to. It’s gonna be sweet rising. Like the honey of a god damn bunny. Yeah, you’ll say bunnies don’t make honey. They do in the home planet where I shall return to. Because nothing, and I mean nothing good has ever happened in this world. And fuck you Sancho, you bitch. You want to eat gravy? I’ll show you gravy. It’ll be my blood, that’s what. You fucking bitch. You think you can make good music? The world’s most famous rapper, oooh I’m so impressed. Nobody is impressed with your dumb ass. All those ho-yos going around saying that you’re the best, well I think they are god damn a figment of your imagination. You’re probably a scientist who came up with mirages that you can use to make people see some damn visions. I saw one of them. And what did I see, that I wanted to swim in the lunar sea. Cray Cray Bootis ain’t with the times dog. I have 23 fans, I checked all their pages. I’m ashamed to have them as fans. There’s nothing in this world for me, see. You’ll be my mortician Sancho. Ok? Fuck. I gave myself three dongs to make myself more appealing. But fuck it, all the hos turned away from it. I know a little science too. Fine, I don’t but I know a scientist. And it isn’t you, goonag… All I ever wanted was to poop in a thyroid. But fuck, it isn’t happening. I guess I’ll have to poop in your thyroid Sancho. You think your song “Groovy Bitch” is really good huh. I think it isn’t. Rhythmic bullcrap.. So corporate. I hate you. Sancho is the worst. What a horrible idiot who sold out. The cretes were the best back in fhe day. But you sold out, and for what. Just some damn fluffy hairdo on your head. It ticks the mind, mind killer. Mind my business you say. You know what, your thyroid is the one I’ve been looking for all these years. Ever since I was 3, and Dr. Sney said I had hypothyroid. That changed my life. They say what song changed your life, that song changed my life. It was musique concrete rap music of the finest order. It changed me. It screwed me over too. When I was 2, I managed to insult my uncle so bad that he moved away to the Far East just to never see me again. I can’t do that anymore. Nobody takes me seriously. Not ever since Dr. Sney’s musique concrete rapping ruined me. He said it like this “You need to listen now. Hypothyroid hypothyroid hypothyroid, hee haw. When you have the hypothyroid don’t forget to caw. Doo doo doo doo we will need your blood. Doo doo doo doo don’t you worry bud. Hypothyroid is a serious disease, or whatever it is. I don’t know if it’s a disease or not. Because I don’t really know the terminology. But you might call me a hack doctor, I think I’m a smack doctor. I smack booty all the time. Don’t think it’s a crime. Hypothyroid hypothyroid hypothyroid, hee hee. When you have the hypothyroid, don’t forget to pee. Doo doo doo doo what do you see. Doo doo doo doo a man that’s very friendly. Bow bow, and I’m smacking your mum’s butt now.” and then my mom did some opera rapping and it went like “HEY! You’re not gonna reach it. HEY! HEY!! Pepper spray.” And yeah I think the doctor was the better rapper. The fact that I thought the doctor was the better rapper really deteriorated my relationship with my mother. She’s outside right now. And damn it, Cray Cray Bootis can’t stand this life. All it ever did was tick me off. Never to hear what I’ve been looking for ever since I was 3. Not even my music is as good as what gone on in that doctor’s office. But at least my music is recorded. Man, he really made a dumb decision to do his best performance without recording it. Or is there a recording of it somewhere? What if the security camera has it? Well I’m gonna have to die now. So who cares. Ok dead in 3, 2, 1.

Alright there’s my fake suicide note. Haha. People are gonna believe its real. I will become so famous. But I got a reason to live. It’s to find the performance of that awesome musique concrete rapping. If I show this to the public, I will become famous and my life will have meaning.

I forgot about this paper. How long ago did I write it. Must’ve been 2 years. I found the security camera footage, nobody liked the music. I don’t know what they’re thinking. How could they not like that rap? It had great musique concrete instrumentation too. The AC was on, there was backing vocals from some nurses outside, there was the sound of the lightbulb, there was the sound of footsteps, there was the sound of my tinnitus. It was everything and more. Nobody understands. I need to write another fake suicide note.

Sancho, we have a problem. I pooped in your thyroid and you claimed to like it. But I know you didn’t. You JUST WANTED TO MAKE ME FEEL LOVED. BUT IT WAS FAKE. And you shielded your fans away from Dr. Sney’s rap. He is the innovator of the musique concrete rapping scene. And you just have been rapping to rhythms. Your song “Gracious Bitch Sundae on a Sunday” was the worst thing I ever seen. Yeah I said seen because it’s only available as a music video. And it’s only on a porn website. That pissed me the fuck off. You aren’t avant-garde. You only have one penis. And I have 6 now. You’re a god damn hack. And you just treat me nicely. But I hate you, and also I’m ending my life. And it’s all because you aren’t showing people the good art which happened in the god damn doctor’s office. I’m 31 years old, and I’m getting sick and tired of you getting all the fans when I only have 36. I’m too old for this shit. The music video sucked because it had bad lighting and the girls had hairstyles that didn’t tickle my fancy. You were on a heart shaped bed with your curly hair covering your eyes and you were fat and you were rapping like you were asleep while making hand gestures that sucked. I still think they’re a mirage. Maybe I should put the doctor’s office security footage video up for the public. That’ll be my swan song. I only put the song available because I thought music videos were for posers and sell outs. But fuck. It might work. Maybe a music video is all I need to be famous. But who cares, I’m going out with a bang. I’ll be famous after death. Because I’ve had it. I don’t want your love. I don’t want your thyroid. You don’t even have hypothyroid or hyperthyroid. You have a plain Jane regular thyroid. Fuck that. It’s useless just like your music. Fine I’ll tell you what use your music has. Getting rid of my morning forest is what I use your music for. I won’t be playing your music as my alarm clock on the morning I END MY LIFE. I will have one last dream, and it will be a lucid dream because I can have those. It will be of the worst thing ever. Fuck all you hos, you think I’m gonna have some meaningful beautiful death? I will have the worst death ever, because I hate you all. I’m gonna imagine during my lucid dream about watching a fake rapper on a fake website on a fake TV. And when I say fake rapper, I mean he doesn’t exist. Not that his music is bad. But it will be bad. Everything is bad except for what me and the doctor did. I even cut out my mom’s rapping from the song because that is what would make it go from a 10/10 song to a 9/10. Let’s analyze your lyrics and I assume the guest star of the song MC Rizlien wrote some lyrics too, and compare them to mine. “It’s Sunday…. It’s Sunday ooooooh. It’s Sunday. It’s Sunday ooooh… (Golden). It’s a golden day and I’m im bed. And it’s like a gracious bitch sundae on a Sunday. I wish it was Sunday everyday. Oooh how I wish it was Sunday everyday, fuck. But it’s not. Oh it’s not. It’ll never be. Not everyday is the same. Everyday is a different day. There are 7 days of the week. But Sunday is the one for me. Sunday. Sunday. Sunday ok sunday ok. It’s the way. It’s the way. All the girls have work except for Sunday. All the girls have work except for Sunday. I only find girls to bang from Chick Fil A. Oh yay. Oh yay. Oh yay. Like a bluejay. Like a bluejay… Oh oh oh. I’m moaning now. I’m moaning wow. (Fuck em up) I’m groaning too. (Hopefully this bitch doesn’t poo) Because I know tomorrow isn’t gonna be Sunday. And the girls in my bed are gonna have to work. (The only working they should be doing is DAT ASS) At Chick Fil A where they’re gonna talk to other men. Fuck this life. (I don’t want a wife) Fuck this life. (I don’t want a wife) But at least it’s Sunday baby. (Sunday, Sunday) I’m a loced out Naga going crazy. (Bah da, bah da da da da) And don’t think I’m a nerd for saying Naga. (We’re gangsters, shit) I’m Mexican so you know we gotta holla. (WOOF!) Bitch I stuff your panties with a dolla. (Benjamin Franklin) I’m so tough and I like it rough. (Spank it) We’re gonna be screwing tonight. (SPANK IT!!!)” And then the music video starts turning into a damn epileptic sex montage all in doggystyle position with the camera flipping a lot while some electro riff that sucks plays for 10 seconds. I’ll give you credit, 10 seconds of instrumental is a lot for a commercial song. And then the chorus plays and it goes “It’s like a gracious bitch sundae on a Sunday, right? (Yesh yesh) It’s like a gracious bitch sundae on a Sunday, and it’s tight. (Well alright) This bitch is so gracious. I’m glad she’s not racist. (Good) I think she needs a facelift. (No she’s perfect)” And back to a verse “Pussyverse is the universe. I don’t care about unicorns so why did they name the universe after that shit. (True, true) I don’t want to fuck that shit. (Me neither) I’m so elite in my judgement. Oooh (Reggae reggae) I’m so elite in my judgement. I’m so elite in my judgement.” Oh yeah he says that line twice in a Jamaican accent after the first time in his regular voice but it isn’t really that clear because he sounds so tired. The rest of the verse goes “Fuck farts, play darts, look at stars. (Like you and me) Fuck Karts (That game’s too hard), play marts (Too many weird looking people there), look at cars. (Cadillacio is wackio) Fuck hearts (Stab it), play hearts (Mess with it), look at bars. (Dress up as a leprechaun in one)” That part makes no FUCKING SENSE. And your rhyme scheme makes no sense. But then the chorus plays and then it’s another verse. “I want it to be Sunday everyday. I want it to be Sunday everyday. If I had my way. That’ll be the day. Vote me for president. Vote me for president. Vote me for president. Vote me for president. Vote me for president. (I’ll vote for you) Vote me for president. (And every bitch is gonna vote for you too) Vote me for president. (Because they’re all attracted to me and you.) Vote me for president. (If you don’t you’re gay) Vote me for president. We’re more hung than the other candidates, we’re more young, we’ve more sung, not so long ago we heard bells rung, they eat dung. Yesh yesh. (Naga gonna rule the world) Yesh fuck ooh bust gonna bust a bust a fuck. If I lost, it’d be like a sundae in the rain. Tastes too much like sogginess. And that would be a miss. Batter batter go… Strike them all you know. Strike them all we go. Woah woah woah woah. I defiled this Chick Fil A’s employees. (And I did Burger King) I defiled them so good. I did it cause I knew someone else would. (La la la la, I’m singing so beautifully, because we are angels, angels, angels, angels angels angels.) They are so gracious… Oh oh oh oh. They are so gracious… Gracious, gracious, gracious… (How long have you been holding it in) Since last Sunday (It’s time you asked her to use her hand to spin) Alright (Some people spend their Sundays with no sin) Heh (She doesn’t know how to use her hand to spin) Dumb ass. You ain’t gracious. (She doesn’t have a robot arm) You ain’t gracious. (Her daddy should’ve bought her a robot arm) If you can’t spin your arm on my length, then how am I supposed to unleash my sundae? This is the worst Sunday! This is the worst Sunday! (Dumb ass rodent ass bitch) I’m taking Benjamin Franklin back. (Too late, she shoved it up her ass crack) I can’t kill you. Because I’m too much of a sensitive guy. When I see blood, it makes me cry. I am a very sensitive guy. So sing with me, I’m singing now, not rapping wow, I’m a singing singing guy. (Oooh, we sing tonight. Our lives not right. This bitch ruined our night. But we don’t care) Oooh I took her underwear. At least give me something. So at least I don’t have nothing. (That’s a good idea, bud). Ooooooh…. Ohhhhh. Ohhhhh. Ah ah ah ah ah ah… This is the worst Sunday. I thought it would be good because I saw a bluejay (This morning), a bluejay (Now we’re mourning), birds are not good… They make you feel good but they really trick you up. (That’s fucked up) They trick you up (That’s fucked up) I’m not gonna kill you so don’t cry. (It’s not because we can’t come up with an alibi) Don’t cry, I’ll give you a paper towel. A paper towel that I wanted to clean other things. (Funny how it don’t work out, funny how it just damn don’t work out) This is the saddest song. Blue balls are gonna come. (Because you didn’t cum) This is the sadddest song, love.” Then it ends with a piano chord and some twinkling. Then s thunderstorm sound effect. Well at least he has some of his musique concrete roots brought in there by having a sound effect in there. But dont think Im impressed, that song sucks. Compare it to my lyrics of “Name of the Game” which are so much more genius and yeah I had to do the backing vocals with my impression of a girls voice. Its not just falsetto so its more impressive than you’d think if you haven’t heard the song, if in any case, STOP READING MY SUICIDE NOTE YOU STUPID TWAT. “Sycophant, little ant hill. Call me Bill swill. I saw a windmill. Risky to jump that. Habitat. Rugrat. Doodle dat. Google hat. Shucks gat. Urinal tract. FUUUUUUUUUCK!!! I’m a groovy little ant shill. I’m a little little dancer. Don’t call me Charles Manser, because that’s not his name. Tell me his name and say it pretty like a dame. If you say it with some shame, then I’ll fart once again. That’s just the name of the game, yes the name of the game. (Fucker fucker gonna shuck her gonna luck her with a plucker in the winter) Ooooh I got some stuff in my shed. Sexy stuff in my shed, no it ain’t dead bodies yeah. It’s not a sex doll either. It’s just rakes. It’s just rakes, Blake. Don’t feel bleak now. Or else you’ll be weak yow.” And then the song has some industrial sounds for 5 minutes and 18 seconds. “Dingbat was a road rat, was a coat hat. Oh mat. Ladi dadi we got a hottie and she is thirty and she likes rakes. She likes rakes. But she likes shoving it up her anus. And that just seemed so heinous. And that just seemed so religious. Religion is bitchin when youre sittin in your kitchen. (Forks, spoons, knives) Eating the bread, thinking why have I said that I don’t like bread. Oh… It’s just the name of the game. (Tick tick) It’s just the name of the game. (Boom) Got a naked dancer here. (Give her a beer) She’s ugly and I don’t care. (We don’t shame) But I won’t poop in her thyroid. And I’m always looking for more. And she asks me for money. I try to be funny. But no laughter. No laughter. (I gotta shag her) She doesn’t want me to shag her. So I guess I got to gas on her. She got angry at that even though it is impressive that I was able to do that on command. Nobody’s impressed by impressive things. Skills aren’t rewarded, you’re only rewarded by people who have been waterboarded. Rapping makes the scenes, but it only means that everybody sees the Yoot Tiger (I’d rather be with a cougar) and the Pot. (He should be shot) The worst two rappers I ever known. It’s 2012 and it’s getting old. Oooh baby oh. She can have my house, she can have my house. I don’t want it anymore. Because she is never gonna leave. She can have my pots and dirty laundry. Dirty laundry. Dirty laundry. Dirty laundry. (THAT WE CAME IN) She better like the smell. This place isn’t Hell. Because hell is other people. La la la la la la. La la la la la la. La la la!!! Yayaya!” Then the song does a jangle pop but deconstructed and it also has a distorted organ playing over it with the sound effects of a broken clock for 2 minutes and then it is the sound of lighting a torch for 3 minutes and 46 seconds. Then the rest goes “Nobody loves me. Nobody cares. That’s just the name of the game. The name of the game, ain’t it a, ain’t it a… (Let me guess, you’re gonna say shame). That’s what I was gonna say. But the word just slipped my mind. (It’s a word you couldn’t find) Thyroids are the best body part. All those people saying other ones, what do they know. I’d block up their ass hole. Because it’s useless useless body part… Awwwwww. Awwwwwww. Ass holes are like igloos, they’re too cold. They get old. They get mold. Ooooh ooh. Those breasts are like didgeridoos, they’re too old, they’re too cold. They get mold. Ooooh ooh. Eyeballs, how they continue, they’re too rolled, they’re too cold. They get mold. Ooooh ooh. Head hair is like cantaloupe, you don’t know what it is. You don’t know what it is when you look at it. Someone has to tell you what fruit it is. And I can’t live with that. I gotta move back to my parents house. Because my old apartment is now owned by a dancer who I hired. Ohhh oh. This is the saddest song. This is the saddest song. Ooooh ooh.” So you see, this song is the real saddest song, your song isnt as emotional now. Let me tell you how the song ends. I recorded the sounds of a circus for 2 hours before getting beaten up by security for recording it which is not even against the rules but they didn’t like it. The beatings were even on the recording. I’m still waiting on my check for reparations. Seems like nobody listened to the song and thought there was some problem that needs to be solved relating to that circus. But who cares, Im gonna end my life. Give it to my ma. Thanks, and goodbye world. This has been Cray Cray Bootis. Goodbye cruel world…

Heh that fake suicide note is gonna shock the nation. The other one didn’t, but this one will. I hope Sancho gets hypothyroid or hyperthyroid for me because of this note. Then he needs to edit his DNA. And he needs to be a better songwriter. And he needs to have womans body parts. Then he needs to have long hair that isnt curly. Then I can have the thyroid of my DREAMS!!!

Chapter 2 Still before the storm, but some pots broke

Written from November 9 to 16

I’m ending my life again. I hated your song “Avant Guard” by Sancho ft. MC Rizlien. It goes like “You think the moon can do anything. You think saying nonsense words can overpower a communist. You think the aliens have more emotions. You think that the goths should be listening to music with organs with their organs. Ohhh you’re an Avant Guard. Ohhh life isn’t hard. Ohhh you’re an Avant Guard. Ohhh life isn’t hard hard, isn’t hard hard. You can get an erection easily. Because you like a girl sincerely. (Avant Guard gonna get so hard, but their life is not very hard. We’re gangsters, shit. We’ve been living tough in it.) You don’t like Rick and Moraty. You call it Rickity Morty. You don’t like rich people like me. You think we’re an enemy. I think you’re an enemy too. Let me show what a thyroid can do… Ohhhhh ohhhh. Ohhhh ohhhh. Ohhhh ohhhh. Ohhhh ohhhh.” Alright this is a cringe love song coming from Sancho, you’d expect it to come from some famous girl singer on the radio with lyrics like that. Welp… It’s a short love song. That’s HOW MUCH HE KNOWS HE IS JUST A THYROID… AND HE DOESNT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME… HE PROBABLY NEVER LISTENED TO MY LONGEST SONGS… He wouldve been inspired. But he never listens to my songs. Anyways this is the shortest song on his upcoming album called “Mexico-Bhutan Relations” which he showed me and it is named after the fact that MC Rizlien who is a Bhutanese guy is featured on every song and he even won an award for his song “Bhutanese More Oppressed Than Black” by MC Rizlien ft. Sancho on his album “Rizlien Addict” and I did some research on what the name means, Rizlien is an antidepressant drug that helps with irritability and the song goes like “It’s time you learned about Bhutan, you futon. (Ok ok) Ever seen a guy walk around New York City with a spear? (I saw one, I didn’t think they were queer) I bet you were too afraid to get near (That’s right, I had to stay clear) Alright, I don’t know how to start this.” That’s the opening skit which is semi-rapped. The rest goes like “Bhutanese more oppressed than black, I saw a black hippie playing hacky sack. I tried to break his mama’s back. With a nut, that was super fat. (Doesn’t seem like it worked, even if you used your weenie as a cork) I broke into that house. Tried to charm her like a funny mouse. Oh how they called the cops on me. Is it cause I’m Bhutanese. (Guess so, nobody knows what you is, they think you an alien or some shiz) Calling the cops on an alien is dumb, horrible idea unless you want to get some. (Are you talking bout cum) No I’m talking about flicking them in the face with my thumb. That ho didn’t care for me, I bet she cares how her son grows though. She had a measure on the wall, 9.5 inches marked with a marker, black like their skin, this hall had aromas of dangling sin. But his penis can’t be laid on the ground like an egg so his wiener isn’t as big as a bad archeologist would think for a discovery he bragged he found. Oh but you have to know, friends don’t mind just how you grow. (Gotta tell that one to the carrots in the farm, you just don’t have to be impressin yo mom, she wouldn’t even like these hymns, and she’ll tell you she doesn’t want you in the gyms, cause they make you gay) Oh but I broke her back anyway. With a gun, didn’t shoot it. (When did the cops get there) Oh I charmed the cops because they were more fair. (And they say fuck the police) Fuck the police? But they love the Bhutanese! Bhutanese more oppressed than black, I saw a black hippie playing hacky sack. Told him I broke his mother’s back. Oh how he sneered at me, told me to go climb a tree, fall off of it like a dumb monkey. Oh but the trees out here, none of them are even that high and none would kill me. I guess you’re just some neurotypical guy who knows how to break the rules on the border line. Because you said something that isn’t technically a death threat, because falling from these trees wouldn’t kill me, wouldn’t kill me. I looked around for a giant tree. Lured him there, hoped he wouldn’t see. That the tree was one you could fall off of and die. Then I talked to a police, said this guy said a death threat to me. I said what he said to me. Then the police arrested him but then he said that I was being rude to him for saying I broke his mama’s back and then the police arrested me, yes he arrested me instead. Bhutanese more oppressed than black, the police loves the black hippie with the hacky sack. (They ruined the rap game) At least I broke his mama’s back. (Do you think if Isaac Newton never discovered gravity, nobody else would? Some other guy would’ve broken her back with the way hacky sack boy was acting, don’t be so proud of it) Logical argument from a guy who knows how to make me cry. Oh but I deserve to cry. Nothing in my life will ever fly… (Sancho gotta pump him up. Not with a dick, but with encouragement, hey just don’t worry about it. But the people wanna know, what the fuck happened to you in jail?) I was just in a cell for a day, but that’s a day I’ll never get back. All because I’m not black! When I got out of the cell, the black hippie was rapping at me. Sancho, do an impression. (I don’t know you naga, but you got a problem, I’ve got a bigger D than you, my mama wasn’t impressed by yours) Then I thought about an actress, I won’t say who because that’s confident, and I got the biggest one. And we compared and well ours were the same size. And yes he had a boney one too, he was prepared to compare these two. Then he said ‘You’re a brotha from anotha motha’ and then I said maybe I’m a brotha from the same motha. Then we hugged with our pants on of course. We became friends, but he died the next day. Oh how that’s why he’s not on this song. He was shot by his mom. I had to kidnap his mom, no longer did I think that she was my mom. And I had to sell her to, a neurotypical guy who knows how to break the rules. And he taught me some tricks. That’s why I can rap this song without getting shit. No longer do I think, no longer do I think, no longer do I think that, Bhutanese, are more oppressed than black. La la la, la la, la la.” I hate this song.... How did they compare their dong size? Did they press them against each others pubic bone? Because you need a bone pressed measurement to be accurate.. Fuck this song… It’s a commercial song and they are sing rapping instead of regular rapping. Well fine, can’t get mad at this song.. MC Rizlien implies himself to be autistic in this song. Well he’s a better rapper than Yoot Tiger, Pot or Cross Eyed Manny (Even if I do like “Old Bitch Anthem” more than this song.) Not better than Sancho. And I never listened to Garry Ponag, Tas, Rap Teacher, the group Sauerkrat’s Johnsons (I heard rumors that they are named after some German girl named Sauerkrat who they all make love to) and I am afraid to listen to Shinji Mikami’s raps. He’s equal to my mom. And obviously Dr. Sney is the king of rap. But god damn it… This song won awards for its themes of anti-racism from the perspective of an autistic gangster who used to be racist and is from an obscure country and for having a science reference along with a depiction of an implied abusive incestous family. Damn it, they only care about the lyrics which aren’t even that good. The music is not artistic enough musically. That’s it, I’m writing a better song than this with the same themes. And he talks about having an actress that he implies he exclusively thinks about to get an erection.. Pfft.. I bet its Mindy Jookinags and not the one I like which is confidential. Im not giving you hos reading my suicide note advice on how to enjoy life. I probably enjoyed life more than you when I was living it. I enjoyed it so much, thats why Im ending my life. If anyone was logical at all, you’d all be ending your life because your lives arent as enjoyable as mine. Now it’s time to hear the lyrics of my newest song “In My Youth” by Cray Cray Bootis and compare them to the lyrics of this crappy award bait. “In my youth, there was truth, hanging down from the roof. Oh babio. Wah wah, wah wah. Babio. Wah wah, wah wah. Babio. Ol lady massagin me nicely. But her hands are rocky as her bottom. Rocky better throttle em, rocky better coddle em, rocky better startle em, Ol Rocky, stupid Rocky. So cocky, never fed a donkey. Go to the zoo you do. Do you like a donkey do you. No no no. You only feed the cuter animals. Because you’ve got a problem. Stupid discriminatory bastard. You’re like a racist but for animals. But maybe you’re racist to humans too. I don’t really know you. I’m only 2. And there’s so much I don’t know. Why I saw them suck on an eggroll. Why I saw them suck on an eggroll, I don’t know. But now I know, it wasn’t an eggroll but a dick. Holy crap that was so sick. Ol Rocky better go now. I’m gonna shoot you up. With proper bullets, not clear ones. Not clear ones. I used to be like you, always making fun of all the other ones who weren’t like me. For me my target was the ones who didn’t know the name of Dr. Sney. Of Dr. Sney. This really broke my family… It really broke my family… Because my mother hated Sney, she thought she was a better rapper than he. And that’s ignorance, that is so ignorant. That is so ignorant. Yeah yeah yeah yeah.” Then Dr. Sney’s hypothyroid rap plays but its remixed with the backing instrumentation being characters from TV shows talking about vegetables. Did you know that eating vegetables can give you hypothyroid? I turned them talking into vegetables into some angelic vocals. Hopefully they see the subtext and understand the meaning of the song and give it an award because of that. “Compare that to my mom’s rap, mom’s rap, compare that to my mom’s rap.” Then my moms rap plays where she just raps boring lyrics about pepper spray or whatever and the backing vocals sound like a demon caveman. Then I go “Don’t you know peppers can give you hypothyroid? Did you listen to what he says? Don’t you know I still have hypothyroid. I could only be with one like me… Or like the opposite of me, hyperthyroid, cause opposites attract.” Then its the sound effect of a thyroid pooping tape between me and Sancho. Lets just pretend thats the sound of me and Rocky. Who is Rocky? Oh yeah Rocky is my aunt. Shes dead now anyway. Then the rest of the song goes “When I was 3, I saw Rocky bang my cousin because he was albino. She wanted something rare to blow. But surprisingly she isn’t interested in my rare items in video games. Well I heard ol’ casual gamers say games don’t have to be hard because you can still brag about having rare items.” See, that’s some philosophical themes added to the song. But I guess people aren’t going to care about this philosophy because its based on the philosophy of gaming. It’s also a Lynyrd Skynyrd reference when they talked about when they heard ol’ Neil say something. Hopefully Lynyrd Skynyrd isnt too redneck of a thing to reference so I get the award I want. Then the rest of the song goes “Now Im in my 30s. My youth was horrible because there was so much I didnt know. But now I see the light, and its time to fight. Its my right to light my smite to fight those in my sight. Its my right to light my smite to fight those in my sight. Its my right to light my smite to fight those in my sight. Its my right to light my smite to fight those in my sight. Rocky is dead, I wish I was the one who killed her. But it was my father. Because she never blew him. Because she never blew him. Because she never blew him. Good that hes gone, he might’ve judged the games I played on my computer for having bad graphics. Good that hes gone, he might’ve judged the games I played on my computer for having bad graphics. I feel like a dino from the Jurassics. Run from the asteroid we go.” Then its the sound of a dino running from an asteroid. A raptor to be specific. If you couldnt tell it was supposed to be a raptor from the sound of the footsteps in the song, youre a lost cause. “So many non-heroes with their judgement. They don’t even know… I see them talking about gaming. Talking about how metaprogression gets them going. Talking about how some easy games are too hard. I see them bragging about liking a game’s story and making fun of people thinking they only like games that are gory. I see them not even knowing the definition of action game, thinking that a fraction of the games are the ones that holds the name. So many idiot gamers, from left to right, so many idiot gamers, all in my sight. Doo doo doo…” I had to insult gamers in this song to make up for my earlier gaming reference because I know they are gonna think Im a member of the gaming community if I talked about gaming in the song. They need to know that I am heavily against much of the gaming community whether theyre an aesthetics focused live action roleplaying right wing gamer who claims to like gameplay but is more a fan of playing pretend (The only thing stopping them from pretending to be the best MMO player of an MMO that they play with toys is the social stigma and also the fact they never came up with that idea because nobody does it or tells people they do it), or an aesthetics focused live action roleplaying left wing gamer who thinks theyre smart for being able to comprehend a basic story. And then its a remix of the Wonderful 101 theme which goes like “Dangers coming dangers coming d-d-d-dangers coming (But is it cumming?) Coming large so who’s gonna stand? (I’d rather they GET ON THEIR KNEES) One hundred rrrrrrrrangers are takin charge (Of my DICK) Knuckles crack (But did I break yo mama’s back, no I’m not MC Rizlien!) Each and every one has got the same thing to say. (That Cray Cray Bootis rules the land, harasses those who are bland. Fights them like a man. Cocaine in his hand, but not to snort, it’s to retort to get you to abort, your genital warts, you collect them like a sport… Cray Cray Bootis is the wonderfulest guy! Wonderful 101 sucks him dry. Oh yeah but this is in the future of the times. Theres no kids in the Wonderful 101. Theres no kids anyway. Cray Cray Bootis gonna fly. With a Unite Rocket, Unite Rocket.) Got no fame, no fortune to claim. (This is the way roll, daddio…)” Then its the sound effect of a plane crash. “I broke the plane, NAGA.” Then the piano riff plays that goes like “Dun dun, dun dun dun dun, dun dun, dun dun dun didudun, dun dun, dun dun dun dun, dun dun, dun dun dun didudun.” And it keeps playing until it fades out. There, that’s a way to get a surefire award, RIGHT?! There’s male and female superheroes in the Wonderful 101, I never rapped about myself doing gay or bisexual stuff before so this should get me an award. Don’t get the wrong idea, this is award bait and not my best song, I made it very commercial while still being good enough for those who count. Well its been two days since I published it and only 14 people listened to it. One comment says “Some dope ass fly shit.” God damn it, this guy doesn’t sound like a genius. I want GENIUSES EXCLUSIVELY AS MY FANS. And he probably didnt even like it that much and is pretending he did. But why I am ending my life? And I know you will say, you wrote two suicide notes already. Youre still alive. Well the first time the trains didnt come and I was getting an erection because sex is just on my mind and it was uncomfortable plus I was wearing kids superhero underwear so it wasnt comfortable at all. Its all I had. My mom didnt do the laundry. I had to put a stop to that train track uncomfortability. And yeah I have many wieners, but only one of them actually gets erect without pressing a remote control button obviously. The second time, Sancho put a stop to it exactly 2 hours before the planned death. MC Rizlien came too. We talked about his song “The Catcher in the Dye” by Sancho ft. MC Rizlien which is a nerdy song from them where they wanted to appeal to emo girls and they wrote a song based on a book. “Ol Hollie Caulfield, was sitting down the street. So many faces that she really wanted to meet. (She is the saddest girl, she is the saddest girl) Ohhh… This song can relate to you emo girls listening. Ohhh let me bask in the glory of the winter of New York City. (She ain’t a gangster like me and you) Ohhh I know my fans aren’t gangsters like me. But that doesn’t make them an enemy. The streets have many gangsters, I grew up on them, I grew up on them… Ohhh ohhh ohhh oh oh oh… La la la la la la…” Then the chorus goes. “The Catcher in the Dye, don’t make her cry, my my my my my my! The Catcher in the Dye, she paints with her eye. La la la la la. That dye is blood… That dye is blood because you’ve hurt her, yes you’ve hurt her… Stupid hooker… Stupid male hooker…” Very commercial sounding chorus, well for a decade long lost… Then the next verse goes “In college, there are mean people who don’t know anything. (They are so stupid, are so stupid…) They don’t want to bang her because she looks weird. Ohhh ohhh ohh ohh. She doesn’t look much like the girls who work at Chick Fil A. But that’s okay… Oh oh.. That’s okay.. Woah woah. (I love her so much) We admire her (And also love her…)” Then Sancho sings the chorus again. Then the next part is still sung and it goes like “‘Bitch bitch bitch’ is what she calls all those people. La la, people.” Yeah you know Holden Caulfield was against swearing (though he said damn), but they couldn’t put that in the song because it wouldn’t appeal to their target demographic. FUCK THIS SONG!!!! IT’S CORPORATE BULLCRAP!!!! AND THE REST OF THE SONG GOES… “Diatribe found under her window, little Clive the little boy she knows was picking at his skin. Then Hollie felt like a demon and bit it. Woah demonic lady. Demonic lady save me save me. Ohhh demonic lady. Ohhh demonic lady, oh. Oh oh oh. Woah. Oh. Woah… (That’s how we roll) When you’re a demon you’re misunderstood... And nobody wants to live in your neighborhood… But I’d let you suck my blood, bud… No need to suck my dick. (Your sperm would make her sick) This life is super sick… Oh how I hate life. We need a revolution baby. We need a revolution baby. (How are we gonna do it) I think with a song. (Is this the song?) Sancho loves you girl. Sancho loves you girl. I’d like to see you twirl. Oh yeah. In this stupid world. There’s nothing to see. At a zoo you see a monkey. He’s not funny, he’s not funky. He’s got nothing for me. But you have something, baby. Yes you have something, baby. For me… (And me) And see… Just us three. Us three. Indeed. It’ll be. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah. OHHHH…” Then the chorus plays twice. Then the end of the song is kind of a skit and it is kind of shit and you can hear coming out their mouths some spit and listening to this will make you want to slit and it goes like “In the mental hospital, the three of us are. We can’t get home because we don’t have a car. We’re crazy as shit. Banana split. Oh yeah. Can I play with magic? Can I play with banana splits? (Don’t play with your food) You’re not my mama. (I’m bigger than yo mama and also bigger than Obama) Did you go insane, did you go insane, you are not my mane. I’m taking Hollie Caulfield for myself. You won’t be here, go be an elf. In Santa’s workshop… In Santa’s workshop… In Santa’s workshop… (Let’s make up) I can only make up with girls because they got the body part I desire. (We’re crazy ass shit) Yeah we got so crazy and I blame it on Hollie. (She fucking sucks at sucking) That’s because you made her suck yo dick, I only asked her to suck my blood. That’s her specialty. You ain’t the specialist, naga. (I’m special) No naga, I said specialist, ain’t say special. (Specialest, that means I’m the most special) No naga, there ain’t a word that means most special. Go back to the damn school and learn something. (Hollie ain’t gonna like that. She hates college. Come with me Hollie) No, come with me. (She ain’t coming with you, who really wants to suck blood instead of a D) You don’t know what the youth of America likes, you naga ass. I’m more in touch. (I never saw you touch her breasts, what’re you gay mofo?) Shut you dumb ass, let me holla. (I ain’t getting lectured by a gay ass punk ass motha) Ugh… This naga is crazy. (We’re in the mental hospital) You think the doctor can hear us? (Let’s shoot him) That’ll make us be friends again, nothing like fighting alongside each other, right Holmes? (You’re damn right)” Then they shoot a doctor. Yeah but there’s only one gunshot sound effect and it’s not explained what happened after that which is more interesting. So that’s bad songwriting for you. Well they didn’t care that I insulted their song to them. They were very friendly to me and my mom from what I could hear through the walls from them entering the apartment. Sancho offered his thyroid and MC Rizlien said he was willing to be a cuckold because he knows many in the rap game are into that based on what he’s heard in recent lyrics from other rappers. I said I don’t like that and he said not to get the wrong idea because he wouldn’t be jealous of getting a thyroid pooped in because he’s not into that. This guy is an idiot because if I was into cuckolding people, I wouldnt want him to tell me that he didnt care at all. Or at least I assume that people who cuckold people are into making people jealous. Why would you be into someone being happy with you doing something? Its like returning a book to the library. Only an idiot would feel good about doing that. I told him to go hang out with my mom but he said he needed to make sure I don’t kill Sancho. So yeah I couldnt really even enjoy the thyroid pooping, not that I even got to that part. Not to mention the fact he doesnt have hypothyroid or hyperthyroid so it isnt that interesting. We were making conversation about that and MC Rizlien mentioned he had hyperthyroid at one point of his life and I wondered if I would be into a former hyperthyroid thyroid. But MC Rizlien said he wasnt interested. I didnt really care because I didnt think I would be into a former hyperthyroid thyroid. It’s like enjoying a soda after the ice made it taste too much like water. Just because it was a full-on soda doesnt mean Im gonna like the fact it tastes too much like water now. Anyways Sancho said while I was pooping in his thyroid which we have to cut a hole in his neck to poop in, and we have a flap that we can use to put the poop in the thyroid. I didnt really have to poop and we had no laxatives. Also I really hate eating so I had to settle for putting brown LEGO bricks in his thyroid. He said it was too sharp so I cut the studs off of the 2x4 LEGO brick that I had and just put the studs in his thyroid and said it’s rabbit poop. Sancho didn’t seem to realize that the studs were too small to be logically rabbit poop. But it still worked because I am not that familiar with rabbit poop so I was into it. Sancho was kinda into it or at least I thought he was. He was laying on the floor and asked for a pillow. Then I had to tell them that he doesnt deserve a pillow. Then he said “Come on, is this part of your fetish too, refusing a pillow?” Then it seemed like he was belittling me so I started a rap battle rapping and doing word play about the words torch and torture. But I admit it, the rapping wasn’t that good. Sancho was impressed with my word play but MC Rizlien wasn’t and he was doing something with his fingers, probably singing a song in his head and counting how many syllables it has by sticking a finger up for every syllable. Sancho asked me to take the LEGO studs out of his thyroid. I said “This is gonna be like playing Operation, the board game.” Sancho said he wanted to reference that board game for a song. I asked why. Sancho said he knows girls like the game so he wanted to impress them. I asked him if he was calling me a girl for being a fan of the game. Sancho said he wasn’t. I told him it wasn’t even in the top 1000 board games. Sancho said he believed me and said it’s a big world out there and there’s so much we don’t know. He bent over and tried to get the LEGO studs out of his thyroid by shaking his body while bent like a dog. It worked. I started to think that I didn’t really care that much about thyroids anymore because this encounter bored me. I told Sancho about this. Sancho said “Good, you can start defiling the city’s biggest Wendy’s.” I told Sancho I doubted I would find every single one of the Wendy’s female employees to be attractive or pleasant enough. Sancho said it was foolish to care about that. I asked him why he didn’t want to defile Wendy’s and he only wanted to defile Chick-Fil-A. He said he wanted to encourage all of his fans to defile every restaurant so that old people who don’t like rap music who like flirting with the girls there can be practical cuckolds. I told him I wasn’t a fan of him. He said he knew that and said he wanted me featured on a song on his next next album “Bible of Rap” after the finishes “Mexico-Bhutan Relations.” I said “Bible of Rap” was an egotistical title. He said what they were doing would be awesome and deserving of the title. BUT IT WASN’T… It’s been 1 day since I recorded my voice for that song. I wrote some lyrics. But his lyrics were so bad that I couldn’t save it. I’m leaking the lyrics to his stupid song which he already finished mixing and it sounded horrible. It’s called “Mindy, Let’s Fuck” and that’s named after the actress Mindy Jookinags. I had to pretend I didnt find her unattractive in the lyrics. Ugh… The song goes like “Mindy Jookinags, you got those brown bags.” I had to imitate a girl’s voice for this part of the song which is fine because I like to showcase my 5 octave vocal range “(What you callin me brown, I’m a white actress) Nah, I’m talking about the bags you’re holding groceries with. But you’re so dirty minded and that’s what I like. (I’d like to see your head on a pike) Eh, I like it when a girl’s mean to me. I love it so sincerely. (Then I’ll be nice to you by saying hi)” God damn it, he didn’t even let me write my own lyrics for this part. Then the rest of the verse goes “What a girl, what a whirl. Let’s fuck tonight in New York City.” Then I finally can write my own lyrics for this part and no longer have to do a girl’s voice. “(We don’t love them hos, we just love Mindy Jookinags, woah she is so pretty and belongs in the city) Yes she does, yes she does. She shouldn’t be living in Montenegro because that place is too weird! Too weird, too weird. Too weird, too weird. Too weird, too weird. (That bitch got you singing like a children’s song) Yes she did but acting like that, it still got long. (Long like a Brontosaurus neck?) Don’t be so nerdy.” Damn it Sancho embarrassed me on this song. FUCK YOU SANCHO.. I’M GONNA KILL YOU. And guess what.. After that he put a sample of an episode of The Big Bang Theory playing while he is talking over it saying “Sheldon is gay probably. Heh, I’m more hung than Sheldon if he’s not a super grower because I see the outline on his pants. This guy Raj is a bitch lover.” Come on dude, this isn’t even related to the song and it’s just related to me being a supposed nerd. Why is he insulting me on the song?! The next part of the song goes like “(I’m not jealous of yo ho bangers because Mindy Jookinags sucked my ween with a happy face) Did she really, did she really (No she did not but she will after this song comes well fine you know what she can bang you instead because I am such a brotha) Yeah all the ho bangers think we’re jealous. I bet she’s a virgin. I bet she’ll scream when she sees the sturgeon. (She’ll scream so loud that your mom walks in) I don’t live with my mom though (Oh I wasn’t thinking that you do, I was thinking she’d travel from miles away cause the scream) IS JUST TOO LOUD…. YEAH!!!!” And I was pissed off at the song for being so boring and the music is just a sample of one of Bach’s most famous cello pieces and he only put that there because they put that music in one of her movies “Phrenulum’s Septum” which he watched for research. We had to watch it together and I hated the movie so much, it had bad lighting and was corporate bullcrap. The plot of the movie was about a government lady who worked at the Pentagon and the cello suite was playing at a birds-eye view of the Pentagon and the fields near it. She befriended a little girl who talks about fairies and snuck her inside the Pentagon into her office and talked to her everyday. But it was found out that the girl was actually the daughter of a gangster but it’s not the rapper kind of gangster, it’s the Italian kind. And don’t think that I think Italians can’t be rappers. The gangster wants to kill the government lady for corrupting her daughter’s mind by teaching her about fairies. But she was already talking about fairies during their first meeting. It’s implied that the gangster gave her schizophrenia which is why she sees fairies. The gangster cuckolds his wife with a young man named Santa which I assume is a reference to Sancho but the similarities didn’t cross his mind. Despite their bond, the Italian gangster insults rap music and that’s when we shut the movie off. Yeah it’s pretty boring and cliche. Anyways then he brought on Pot who is considered to be one of the best rappers and I was no longer doing vocals for the rest of the song. I guess he thought Pot could be more charming than me because he is known as the “lovey dovey” rapper. And I guess Sancho really wants to bang this actress. This could cause some tension between him and MC Rizlien. “Pot, smoke some fly shit up. (This naga came in with a free Lamborghini, he said he wanna see me, rapping some shit, and teach him how to be rubbin’ a clit.) He didn’t let me test the waters on his wife, oooh (My wife is my life and I am not into the cuckold game that the rap game is into these days, I miss the good old days, forever betrayed to an avalanche of new ways that acts like a beast that must be slain.) You think I could get this girl? (I bet you could with the beat that you smoked up, toked up. I bet you could, I’m the witness that you croaked up, loced up.)” Oh come on, a puzzle video game reference, I guess he’s trying to get some credit with the new slaughterings of the gaming scene. My song insulting the gaming community probably ticked him off and had him on his knees looking for a way to get gamer cred. Pathetique… I knew he admired me, he is the witness loving me. Maybe he’ll leave his wife in a desperate attempt to be with someone who is smarter. Because I really doubt his wife is some kinda genius or somethin. But heres the rest of the song. “Rubbing the clit’s like a rhythm game, something you can play by using your reflexes and membrane. (Geometry Dash is the best rhythm game) Rubbing the clit makes the girls say woo, shortening the word to clit makes you sound so coo. (It makes you sound in with the times, the urban kid, they’ll say god forbid, just because we know how to generate a fluid.) I’ll pleasure you Mindy (I bet you will) I’ll do a good job (That’s what I like to hear, better put a ring on her too) I’ll pleasure you Mindy (I bet you will) I’ll do a good job (That’s what I like to hear, better put a ring on her too) No more girls from Chick-Fil-A, forget about Sunday. I’ll take you to church, unless that’s not how you want to spend your time on God’s green Earth. And I can drop God out of that sentence with ease. Just wanted a rhythm to please. Your ears. Your ears. I’ll be breathing in your ears, alright. Erogenous zones (Dynamite)” Then it goes to a drum beat that goes “Dum dum, dum dum dum, dum dum dum” then he samples Robert Wyatt’s song “Little Red Robin Hood Hit The Road” with a Scottish guy named Ivor Cutler saying “I want it. I want it. I want it. Give it to me.” While playing the same drum beat over it then it instantly goes to the drum beat which sounds like “Dum dum dum, bum bum, dum dum dum, bum bum. Dududududududududududu, bum bum, bum bum PSSSS, bum bum, bum bum PSSSS, bum bum, bum, bum PSSSS. Dum dum dum, bum bum, dum dum dum, bum bum, dum dudu dum dudu dum dudu dum, dum, dum, dum, dum.” End of song, will it get him the girl of his dreams? I say probably not. Music is just background noise for people. They don’t care. And anyways Pot must feel threatened by a true gamer as he is a self-proclaimed gamer and has some gaming references in his music. One lyric he has referencing them is “Life’s progression system isn’t that good, is God a bad developer?” in his song “Hunger Than/Then God” on the album “The Thinking Man’s Rapper” and he thinks the title “Hunger Than/Then God” is a genius wordplay because it is a double entendre that means he is hunger (more hung) than God and it also sounds like he is criticizing God (“Hunger then, God”) which implies he was arguing with God about why he is bad and God refuted him then Pot brings up world hunger (then) as a rebuttal as to why God sucks and God was speechless. It says a lot about his ego that he puts “Than” before “Then” in the title because he would rather be known as being more hung than God instead of saying that God is responsible for world hunger. What an egotistical bastard… Plus he says God is a bad game developer but doesn’t even say he is a bad game designer, which is the proper term that he should be using. Anyways I am so pissed that the lyrics I wrote for that Sancho song suck ass. He rejected most of my lyrics saying he appreciated them but they were not going to work with his plans. Well I will have to delay the appearance of this suicide note until he comes out with that album. He would just cut me out of the song. There’s many rappers who went on crappy songs to become more famous and also to get poon. I don’t want poon though unless it belongs to a cool person. Maybe this Sauerkrat that the Johnsons of “Sauerkrat’s Johnsons” like, maybe she is really cool. I gotta find her… I GOTTA FIND HER!!! But she might not be real, nobody knows for sure what their group name means because it’s unconfirmed. Let’s hear a song from the Sauerkrat’s Johnsons. Alright I’m playing it right now. It’s their most hated song, “Wild Krats.” I figured I would like their most hated song the best and it would give me the best impression. Here we go. “(Verse sang by Talos Bauder, AKA The Host of the Apartment) Black brotha from anotha motha, we are Germany and Kazakh, we are the bitches from the southern block. Don’t salute me, don’t refute me, only if you got a gentle pussy. Like an African crested porcupine, get your creature power on, we are the Wild Krats.” Alright it sounds like he is saying that the African crested porcupine has a gentle pussy but he is actually comparing himself to this animal. The song is about a show called Wild Kratts, I watched that show sometimes just to mock it. But eh, this song is pretty good with African savanna sounds in the background with some real ancient instruments playing and it isn’t repetitive. “(Chorus 1 by Kev Jung, AKA Frolicking Gunner) African animals, African animals, transform into them, trans-transform into them. African animals, African animals, transform into them, trans-transform into them. (Verse sang by Kev Jung, AKA Frolicking Gunner) Some peoples say the show Wild Kratts is racist, some people just can’t face it. There is a black woman in the main cast. She has no problem with the fact (Jonatello: “Fact”) That these Wild Kratts transform into African animals instead of African humans, black brotha who acts so Southern, from anotha notha country from the Civil War so many years before. You love the show thinking it’s racist. To the opposite man, you say the show’s not good enough, saying Koki acts like a mad whore. (Talos Bauder: “The only people who analyze her character like that are a bore”)” Alright so they are insulting both left wing haters and right wing fans of Wild Kratts, getting angry at the left wing haters for thinking that the show is racist because they never transformed into an African human, only African animals. And the right wing fans are being criticized for liking the show thinking it’s racist. Well great, these guys really are political geniuses, showing that left wing and right wing can’t even analyze a children’s show properly. Wow. But I wonder, do the Sauerkrat’s Johnsons really like the show Wild Kratts that much? “(Chorus 2 sang by Kev Jung, AKA Frolicking Gunner) Nagas don’t play with me, Wild Kratts just a pastime for the pussies whose babies we put to bedtime. Nagas don’t play with me, Wild Kratts just a pastime for the pussies whose babies we put to bedtime. (Verse sang by Jonatello) Never watched that show, I don’t even know. Walked down the street though, saw a man with a ho. He asked why you acting gay on some of your songs. Then he smacked that ass thinking I would be jealous as if I don’t have my bongs. You kiss a girl who has lips as big as a donut (Jonatello echo effect: Donut, donut, donut) (Next part is Jonatello singing alongside with what sounds like a children’s choir but isn’t) On the table lies dank paper, for the rhymes that I wrote stoned, I am the greatest rapper, and all of you are under the throne… (Back to normal) So when you see my on the street, ask me for an autograph. I’ll charge you but I will let you have it free if you have cancer or have the body of a dancer, prancer, Manser.” Alright, another guy who mispronounces Charles Manson’s name to rhyme. Great… As if that isn’t so cliche. And this guy didn’t do his research on the show that the song is about. He is the weakest link of the group, I bet the fans hate him too. I don’t care if he referenced Van der Graaf Generator, because he ruined the lyrics. But wait, there’s another verse from the last member of the group, but first we need to hear another chorus. “(Chorus 3 sang by Kev Jung, AKA Frolicking Gunner) Wild wild Kratts, we don’t like fucking hood rats. They get in our shit. I wouldn’t transform into a man that could get closer to your armpit. Even if it’s hairy as fuck, the hair probably is shaped by a horrible craftsman. Let’s just say God didn’t sculpt you the best but don’t be ashamed, you’re like all the rest. Wild wild Kratts, we don’t like fucking hood rats. They get in our shit. They get in our SHIT!!!!” Alright, hairy armpits are ok but not really the greatest thing in the world. Now thyroids, well I’m not really into thyroids anymore. I don’t know why I’m like this. I’m not into it. That’s the old me. And if I wrote a song about how I changed as a person, well the fans are going to think I’m trying to come up with a new persona… THIS IS WHO I AM NOW. LIKE IT OR NOT… YOURE NOT A REAL FAN, ILL KILL YOU. ILL KILL ALL OF YOU. I… am sorry… This is not who I am. Lets just see the final rapper... “(Verse sang by Sauerkrat Wansson) An angel around us, caring for a bin, that was never filled within. Let the trees fall down, dodging fertile ground, into the portal’s mound. A basilisk, of Krattian foundry, or is it Sauerkratian soundly?” Woah… A girl named Sauerkrat is real… These were great vocals… I think these lyrics mean she’s a virgin. I’M INTERESTED!!!!!!! Or is it about her losing her virginity? Trees falling down into a portal? Well portals aren’t necessarily ovals. Dodging fertile ground, hmm… I think these lyrics are about circumcision. They dodged the circumcision but ended up getting circumcised later in life. It means that the trees (which is a metaphor for male human dongs) dodged the initial circumcision but later in life, a demon that came from a portal convinced them to circumcise themselves. Or maybe it means she doesn’t care if people get erectile dysfunction with the lyrics “Let the trees fall down.” Oh maybe it means that people are porn addicts and they dodge fertile ground which means fertile poon and they got erectile dysfunction. Well I hate pornography because of bad lighting, uncool actresses who don’t have appealing voices or dialogue and they also make annoying facial expressions that make them look like an idiot, and there really is never gonna be a pornographic video that is exactly what you want to see if you have an actual imagination so why even bother. The lyric “Let the trees fall down” sounds a lot like a Yes lyric “Let them rape the forest.” Wow she likes Yes?! And she compares herself to a basilisk, wow, she must feel like a creature. I would rather she say she feels like an alien because they are more intelligent than basilisks but the song is about Wild Kratts so they had to compare themself to an animal that the Wild Kratts transformed into. Great… So the rumors were true. All I had to do to confirm these rumors was listen to a song they made. Great… I’m not ending my life. I got a new purpose!!!!! Hmmm.. Looking at Sauerkrat Wansson’s Wikipedia page… “Sauerkrat Wansson is the daughter of German-Kazakh scientist, musician, and professor Philipo Wansson.” “Dr. Wansson wanted to create the world’s greatest hip hop group which consists of 3 male students he saw in a tribute band of Hedgen which is a Genesis clone from Thailand. They scoffed at the idea. Dr. Wansson told them they could impress his daughter. They said she is already impressed by their Hedgen tribute band. Dr. Wansson said Hedgen was a band that he was secretly the drummer of during his trip to Thailand in the 1970s and he wanted them to form a hip hop group. Guitarist Talos Bauder and keyboardist/bassist Kev Jung said the drummer was the worst part of the band. Jonatello, then known by his full name Martin Jonatello was angry at these remarks and said he was into the hip hop group idea. Talos Bauder and Kev Jung decided to do it because they claimed to have ‘mastered all the Hedgen songs anyway and should attempt to compose music.’” Hmm…. This is a weird story. Hedgen, huh… I listened to them a lot before I had access to the Dr. Sney tape. But hmm… Martin Jonatello… I have a conspiracy theory… He actually did watch Wild Kratts and changed his name to Jonatello because he hates the show! Because one of the Kratt brothers is named Martin! This will be the key to me seducing Sauerkrat, she will be laughing her ass off when she sees me insult the weakest link of the hip hop group she is in! But let’s read the rest of the Wikipedia page. “Sauerkrat Wansson joined the band on their third album ‘Cavemallion’ after Dr. Wansson said ‘This group got it all wrong. They were writing uninspired hip hop songs albeit with musical instruments. I wanted them to mix progressive rock and hip hop together. Perhaps with my daughter in the band that they named themselves after because they all love her, they will become so motivated to impress her with her presence in their sight.” Let’s look at some lyrics from the first song from their first album… “How to bang 101, this is how you have some fun. (Ooooooh, it’s precious) How to bang 101, this is how you find a bun. (Ooooooh, it’s freshness) How to bang 101, how to bang 101… (We’re in night schoolllllll, we’re in night schoolllllll) First you find a bun. If you don’t get it, you’ll need a gun. (Will an AK-47 do?) You better be Russian to get to class, or else you won’t ever find a piece of ass.” Alright I don’t even know who sang that verse and the backing vocals because it isn’t stated on the lyrics website I go on. And I can’t differentiate their voices yet. The instrumentation is interesting enough and has a guitar solo playing the whole song, and it sounds like a school. They even have a school bell as the percussion. Well fine, this song was the first song on the album so maybe it isn’t representative of Philipo Wansson’s complaints because the first song is often the best. But the lyrics aren’t as good as Hedgen’s “Elvenis Prarfley” You’ll say it’s not fair because Hedgen is a progressive rock band. But hey, they were inspired by them. Compare it to this… “In the shrine where we dined, I saw a concubine… I set him free, little bee…. In the gown where mothers frowned, I sat my legs unbound, confound… I was stared at… By a meadow. She was looking at me, pat my eyes in misery. Mongrel dogs eating paper that was just cut from a tree, it could’ve been a little girl’s diary. The hound can now be pawned, for he has treasure in him, though immeasurable from a skim. Wings fly free in daisy land, where cowards fit into their hands. Bobby Blue was goo, and I put him in a shrew, like lackidoodledoo, wazza wazza woo, hoo hoo… What do I do? When I see a citizen fighting a magician, this life is misery. Click the trick. Trick the click. Lick the plick. Plick the lick.” Then there is a great guitar riff, the lyrics say lick but it is actually a riff that they play after that. I don’t need to recite the rest of the song anyway because everyone with half a brain knows it and probably can recite the lyrics in the middle of a conversation with an annoying middle-aged lady who would be shellshocked if you started singing those lyrics to her. This song is a great semi-oriental and sentimental song about a fictional universe where a half-elf half-dwarf Elvis Presley visited Thailand and sadly became a concubine and was set free by the protagonist and slowly but surely, Elvis saved the country which was earlier a land of misery. But I don’t know why these guys like Elvis so much anyway. Clueless boomers… Who is knocking on the door? Gotta hide this suicide note…

Well it has been 8 hours since then. Pot came by. He was crying. I asked him if he was crying because I insulted the gaming community. He said he didn’t care about that but he was obviously ticked off at his inferior gaming opinions but he said that Sancho made him sing horrible lyrics on his song for Mindy Jookinags and that was why he came here. He said, and I am quoting him as I remember it very clearly, “This is gonna ruin my career! I wasn’t thinking clearly! No, bruh… No…. We need to kill Sancho.” I asked him if those were new lyrics because “career” and “clearly” kinda rhyme and he rhymed “No” with “Sancho.” Pot looked at me with eyes wide open. “Should we make this a song? He screwed us both.” I said no because the last thing I want to do is die with a new purpose in life with Sauerkrat Wansson on my mind, but he could make the song himself. I asked Pot what he thought of that girl. He said “I’m married. I couldn’t say anything nice about another lady. It’s a good thing I didn’t compliment Jookinags in the song. But there’s still some problems. I wasn’t thinking clearly about how bad this song could be if my wife hears it.” I asked him what’s the problem, and told him to just explain that Sancho made him rap that crap. He said “I wrote those lyrics myself. Come on, you think Sancho could write that good? The problem is that my wife would be wondering whose clit we used to help Sancho learn how to rub one?! Because I clearly state in the lyrics that I taught him! And also it implied that I was in the room teaching him, it was not the girl teaching him!” I said that he should just tell Sancho to rerecord the song. “That asshole said it was musical perfection and should not be changed.” I said I didn’t care and I needed the fame so Sauerkrat Wansson knows of my existence. I knew the song was putrid, but I knew she would look into the rest of my music and be amazed. And also with the release of this “suicide note,” the hip hop community would be shooting the shit about how I hated that song. It will be the new greatest joke in the hip hop community. Pot said “My wife leaving me because of this shit song would be a bigger joke than yours. So ha.” I said it doesn’t matter which joke is the biggest, because the people who count would like my joke better. Pot said “There’s nothing funny about some rapper not liking a song. It’s fucking cliche.” I told him to leave because this was going nowhere. He broke a fucking vase when he left. I hate that asshole. But let’s not give into hate. Sauerkrat Wansson probably doesn’t have hate in her heart. She seems nice. And if she does hate people, well good because uhhhh… I had a degenerate thought about taming. I once improvised a piano solo as a love song to a girl but in the middle of it I thought something degenerate and she could tell I was having degenerate thoughts because the piano melody sounded very degenerate and I got so scared that my heart beated so fast and I stopped playing then I continued the solo after 2 seconds of silence. I only had degenerate thoughts because I thought it would be cool to have some degenerate thoughts but it was a bad idea and it ruined the piano solo. The degenerate melody can be played on a piano with just white keys, F F D F E A A, all in C2 octave. God damn it, it sounds like “I’m going to goo in you,” being sang in a gay voice. And she had an ear for it and knew that I was being a degenerate. After that I tried to salvage it by playing dissonance to make it seem like I played that horrible melody on purpose. Damn it, those days in piano keyboard class… They were horrible. And I really loved her, but I had to think horrible things because I thought that was what I was supposed to do to make the piano solo better and more emotional. Well I’ll be releasing this life note by mailing it to the Hip Foundation after the collaboration song comes out and DJ Yoyo Pitch will be sure to read this on his radio station because it’s some fiery smoke. I know I said I was gonna leak the collaboration song, but it’s a bad idea. He’ll change the song if I leak it. Plus he isn’t gonna read this on the radio before the song comes out. Anyways if you were wondering… The last suicide note I wrote, I wore my leather coat, I printed it and put it in halls on walls, sure to get some drawls. Is that a fiery rap lyric? If you said yes, you’d better listen to the rest of my music! This is Cray Cray Bootis, signing off. Oh yeah and DJ Yoyo Pitch, play Dr. Sney’s rap.

Chapter 3 Part 1 The Storm Part 1

Written on November 17

Welp… Im waiting for two Sancho albums to come out so I can release that damn life note. What should I do? Listen to some Sauerkrat’s Johnsons songs because they are doing something interesting? I was thinking I could insult Pot but Pot claimed to be in a gang in one of his song’s lyrics. I don’t want to die. Honestly he could have killed me because I insulted his gaming knowledge. Eh, the other life note is gonna show people what an arse he is. His wife is gonna leave him, no doubt about it. Or is she? It’s benign, so what if he taught him how to rub a clit. It’s not like he got an erection to the girl’s parts. Or maybe he did. Hmm… But he heard moaning presumably. I dont really care about Pot. Hes an asshole. Thinks he’s a political genius too… Just check his song “Governments Gotta Go) ft. General Gabriella” which he raps in the note G exclusively because the title’s words all start with that letter and he thinks he is clever, even hired some girl off the street and gave her a fake rap name that has two words that start with the letter G. Some people call her Genital Gabriella because they hate this song. I wouldnt go so far, they should be insulting Pot. “I was smoking a blunt. You know what time it is. Crawling the streets, dun dun dunt. I saw a person call her cunt. (So rude, that attitude) It seemed like a horrible feud. A man in a black black suit. Government smile, government file… But I bet he’s a pedophile. (He breathes like one). Naga, governments gotta go!” I don’t even know why he says naga, he’s half black. “Governments gotta go, replace them with rappers, we’re hanging from the rafters. They throw a baseball to an agent with a bat. Wasting time just so the kill can be juicy. No home run, they aim it at our feet. Shoot a gun, that’s what we will do. I’ve had it, you motherfucking you. I don’t like that shit. It pisses me off, innit. (Roight roight, just spit on em.) That’ll wipe em out, we won’t get the gout. Kills of a high amount. I’ve had it with you dood (UH!) I’ve had it with you dood (UH!) It’s time time time time time time, the government goes! Because they’re assholes.” Then there’s the plot twist. “Those were the words of me at age 13. You must’ve been moved like a couch or a chair. Government agents collect ladies underwear. But I don’t care. I’d rather collect pubic hair.” This was before he met his wife anyway, this was the song that made him big. Just so you know because everybody reading this should hopefully be too genius to even ever consider listening to Pot’s music. And how about the beat, I could just see him imagining that it is so beautiful but it’s not, it’s too typical. On the G string of the guitar the riff goes 2-2-6-9-6-2 then D string onto 6th fret and it repeats forever except for the ending where he switches the 9th fret onto the B string and that fret is held for longer than on the G string and switches it to the previous riff back and forth. It sounds so silly… Just have to explain the riff to you so you don’t have to listen to the song because supporting this asshole is an idea that is horrible. “Naga gaga genital gonna go getta green gyro. Naga gaga genital gonna go getta green gyro. (The government eats that shit?) You better believe it, they’re like Sam-I-Am, motherfucker eating green eggs and ham in a gyro. What do I know, I know what I saw. These motherfuckers have no soul, they go home and fuck a garden gnome. And I ain’t insulting the bitches in their breeches that they have in the kitchen. I’m insulting the ornament on the lawn that their eyes gotta fawn. In the light of dawn, naked lady breaking the law. Nobody cares but the government’s unaware that nobody cares. They think this bitch is a lawn ornament? She looks like a garden gnome! (I wouldn’t wanna be looking like that, shiet…) Damn right… Stupid gnomette lying on her side. Tell Juliet she can be my bride.” Juliet isn’t a real person, just a fake name for his lyrics. And you might be wondering what is the point of these lyrics… Well it’s based on a news story about a government agent who had a lady lie on her side on his lawn naked. Well it’s a boring story, never really cared about politics. It’s a bore. Have you ever heard of a politician who listens to good music? No? I thought so. Can’t relate to those stupid motherfuckers. It’s not even worth talking about them. I wonder if Sauerkrat likes politics, probably not. Screw this song… It’s not even worth mocking. I need to read all of her Wikipedia page and interviews too. Wikipedia page first… “Sauerkrat Wansson pursued an acting career and briefly visited America to film a role as ‘Yeabs’ in the 2023 underground film “The Numobismal Institute” directed by Shinki Saitomallet.” Alright, let’s see this film. Her character is named Yeabs. Cool name.

In an alleyway in New York City. Three people there. And there’s a cat.

Hugoo Yubawoba: Puss…. Come here puss cat….. ARGH!!!!! What’s this? A microphone?! Why would a cat be holding a microphone?!

Yeabs: Who says it’s a microphone? It could be a superweapon.

Hugoo Yubawoba: Shut up, you aren’t the puss I like. And I don’t like them that way!

Back to Bootis commentary. Come on, is this supposed to be funny? I don’t even know what genre this movie is. My favorite game analyzer said it’s a good idea to avoid spoilers. So I listen to his advice. This film seems artistic otherwise… Back to the movie…

Yeabs: Son of man…

Isuldi: Nonagon splendid. Nonagon SPLENDID!!!!!

Yeabs: Stop saying that rat shit. It’s horrid.

Isuldi: We need purpose, let’s speak into the microphone.

Isuldi picks up the microphone.

Isuldi: NONAGONS!!!!!!!!

Yeabs: The only shape I care about is the Pentagon.

Hugoo Yubawoba: That’s horrible, do you not like life? Life is filled with all kinds of shapes, of different kinds.

Isuldi: You will know that the Nonagons will be the new Pentagon.

Hugoo Yubawoba: Christ…

Yeabs: I hear some thugs.

Isuldi: Thugs will be the greatest warriors.

A “thug” appears.

Harold: Give me my microphone back. I’m trying to rap some shit.

Yeabs: Give him the damn thing.

Isuldi: I need purpose. Let me rap.

Back to Bootis commentary. Why does every movie I watch have to talk about rap… This makes no sense. Back to the movie.

Isuldi: I see a bulge in your pocket.

Harold: Yeah it’s my drugs.

Isuldi: How about we trade.

Hugoo Yubawoba: Christ!!! Just stop. I don’t want to hang with you people. I just want to pretend to be a cat.

Yeabs: No you don’t. You think you want that, but you don’t.

Hugoo Yubawoba: Who are you to say?

Harold: Uh… Just give me the microphone or I’m calling the cops.

Isuldi: I am a cop. Idiot.

Harold: No you’re not.

Isuldi shows his teeth.

Isuldi: Does this look like the smile of a gentleman?

Harold: Give me the fucking microphone.

Hugoo Yubawoba: Jesus Christ… Just stop talking all of you. It’s not time for these ears of mine…

Isuldi: You need to enter the realm of the Numobismal. Never again will you say the name of Christ.

Yeabs: Again with this. I’m going to the square.

Harold: You seem nice, lady. Can I come with you?!

Yeabs: Ok…

Back to Bootis commentary. I look a lot cooler than Harold… And I’m not saying that because he’s uh… I don’t know what race he is. But he is foreign. I can’t tell what race people are by looking at them. I’m a foreign one too, I don’t even know what I am. This movie seems to be setting up some cult stuff… Better not be talking about god damn Charles “Manser…” Back to the movie.

Yeabs and Harold walk to the square and she eats some cantaloupe that she bought.

Harold: Uh… So do you wanna hear me rap about you?

Yeabs: Sure…

Harold: Defuse the blood fuse, with your red shoes. Like the green giant, it was a riot. When I smoked like a lion. But I don’t do that anymore. Because I saw a nice lady, who looked very crazy. In the time of my days, in the crime of the sage. It’s a new age. And I got some rage…

Yeabs: That’s enough… I don’t know what you’re saying.

Harold: Do you like cryptic people? Because I’m one.

Yeabs: Not really. Damn Isuldi, the guy who wanted your drugs. He’s a cryptic person.

Harold: How do you know those two guys?

Yeabs: We’re foster children and in the same family.

Harold: Wow, I was a foster child too.

Yeabs: Really?!

Harold: No.

Yeabs: Why even say that.

Harold: It’s an attempt at being funny.

Yeabs: Listen, I’ve got to go home and hear Isuldi’s damn speech…

Harold: I would like to hear. And I need my damn microphone… I’m poor. You like poor people?

Yeabs: Doesn’t matter to me…

They go to the apartment where Isuldi is and Hugoo Yubawoba are and also their foster mother Shakkloo. There is also a 1st grade teacher’s class here who were invited.

Shakkloo: You look too old to be a student.

Harold: Hello madam. I’m just a rapper and I wanted to hear a speech. This could be good rapping material.

Shakkloo: Music must be banned.

Harold: Well at least you think rap is music, heh.

Shakkloo: Are you trying to be funny?

Harold: Yes.

Isuldi: It’s time… To explain the Numobismal ways!

The children cheer.

Mrs. Drop: Hold on, let me say something. I’ve been talking to Isuldi for years. He is a genius and it’s about time we all learned about the future of politics and religion.

Isuldi: Yes, yes…

Hugoo Yubawoba: Finally the secret thing you’ve been working on will be known. Which you disclosed to some random broad… Instead of us… Why?!

Isuldi: Just shut your ass. Oh sorry kids. Alright, well the Numobismal.. It’s a dimension. I saw it… I wasn’t even on drugs, and kids, drugs are something that you…

Mrs. Drop: I already taught them about drugs. They’re very educated.

Isuldi: Great great! That’s so splendid!

Yeabs is making a face of boredom and Harold is looking at her.

Isuldi: The great Numbo was the one who must be known. I saw his journal in the cavern in Africa.

Harold: Oooh Africa! Some of my ancestors are from there!

Isuldi: Shut your trap…

Mrs. Drop laughs and so do 5 of 17 kids.

Isuldi: Numbo met a sexy lady… Oh can I say sexy?

Mrs. Drop: Yes, you can.

Isuldi: Yeah well she was sexy for the time, this was about 3500 B.C. Oh yeah and it shouldn’t be called B.C. But eh, let the dumb be dumb. Right? But Numbo was a crazy guy who came up with the idea of Zhamashura. Right? Ever heard that word?

Yeabs: Nobody has… Just go on with it and stop wasting time!

Harold laughs but it is fake.

Isuldi: Zhamashura is when you like something that is not the greatest but you still like it, right? So he was with a cannibal lady, and they were let’s just say massaging each other…

Back to Bootis commentary. Is this supposed to be funny?! This guy is clearly an idiot. Hmm.. I wonder how much Sauerkrat acts like her character… Back to the movie.

Isuldi: He was not afraid of the bite of DEATH… He was half bored, half engaged during the massages. Most people would be fully engaged even if they didn’t know she was a cannibal. Numbo was not attracted to her, not because she is a cannibal but because he saw a vision. The Numobismal vision of creativity. It was amazing. What he saw was so interesting. I bet you know what he saw. The greatest being ever!

Harold looks at Yeabs.

Hugoo Yubawoba: The greatest being is of course a cat.

Isuldi: No, it is a human. But not a full-on human, a human who was from the Numobismal realm. He was named Numbo but he changed his name to Numob, which is where the word Numobismal comes from.

Yeabs: Why did he change his name?!

Isuldi: Many people were named Numbo in that time period in that region. He saw the power of creativity and changed his name to something nobody was named.

Yeabs: We all have rare names in our family. So what?

Isuldi: It is because our family are Numobismal ones. It’s as simple as that.

Shakkloo: Oooh I knew we were a special family. I always picked the ones with the weirdest names. Hehe.

Isuldi: We will replace the Pentagon with the Nonagons… Because nonagons are what Numbo saw in his voyage of conquest to create the biblical Israel… And create a fake religion so that only the real ones can see the light. The Numobismal ones, we are here tonight.

Harold: This was a great speech! Woo!!!

Isuldi: But none of you will join my kingdom. None of you will remember this. And that is the folly of man…

Hugoo Yubawoba: But I am son of man… I had the dream when I was 6.

Isuldi: You are the prophet, I guess… And you must say what I say. You must not go and talk about cats no longer. There were no cats in the book of Numob.

Hugoo Yubawoba: I’m not doing this. I just want to be a simple man!

Yeabs: Let him be…

Isuldi: Stop! You are not acting Numobismal! You put me in a fiery rage to refuse what is written on the page! Read it, read it! But be gentle with it.

Hugoo Yubawoba tore the book of Numob!

Isuldi: Why is he the prophet, not me?! That’s it. I’m going into politics. I will change this world.

Isuldi goes outside into the city and talks to a lady who is a politician.

Isuldi: I have founded a new political system. It is the system of creativity. The more creative the solution, the better. I have solved the school shooting problem. All you have to do is change gravity so bullets don’t work.

July Rainy: Like the Kanker Soar song, ‘oh there goes gravity!’

Isuldi: You don’t sound smart… Can I talk to someone a little more genius?

July Rainy: Ohhhh look at you. You think you’re so smart. Tell me, what is your favorite color?

Isuldi: Green.

July Rainy: That’s an idiot’s favorite color. The Green Party is BLEH!!!!

Isuldi: Who said I like a color because of a political party? I’ve had it with you. Do you even know who invented the cotton gin?

July Rainy: Uh no. Why would anyone think they’re smart for knowing that?

Isuldi: CHICKEN BALLS!!!! AHHHHHH!!! AHHHH!!! OMEGA LANKY FARTS!!!!!

July Rainy: Hahaha. You’re funny to a degree.

Yeabs enters the politician’s room.

Yeabs: Any success?

Isuldi: How’s things going with Harold?

Yeabs: I’m not interested in him or anybody. All I want is to do something crazy…

Isuldi: Then join my movement.

Yeabs: Alright…

Isuldi: Mrs. Rainy, you need to change political parties to the Numobismal party, right Yeabs?

Yeabs mouths the word “yeah” with her eyes wide open and nods.

July Rainy: Ooooh. Ok…

July Rainy is biting her lip.

Back to Bootis commentary. God damn it, damn lesbianism?! Everybody is attracted to the girl I like in this movie?! My former favorite actress, I rarely heard people say they liked her. I used to scavenge the internet to see people say they liked her. Some said they did, but I don’t think they liked her that much. Well fine, this is just a movie. And the other actresses aren’t that cool looking… No offense. But damn it… Back to the movie.

Back to the apartment, everybody left except the family. The camera is close up at Hugoo Yubawoba’s face who is sitting and he is acting “derpy.”

Hugoo Yubawoba: Erm… Ploop! Erm… Plap!! Erm… Pap!!!

Isuldi, Yeabs, and July Rainy are behind him.

July Rainy: This guy needs to be a patient, oh my god!

Hugoo Yubawoba turns his chair around.

Hugoo Yubawoba: Some hairdo ass bitch is going around calling me crazy. You think I care? I am the true genius of the family. I know what’s been going on. Isuldi gets all the praise. But I am the true genius! I am son of man, damn it!

July Rainy: Woah… Heh. What have you ever done in your life?!

Hugoo Yubawoba: I defused the blood fuse, with my red shoes. Like the green giant, it was a riot. When I smoked like a lion. But I don’t do that anymore. Because I saw a cruel lady, who looked very crazy. In the time of my days, in the crime of the sage. It’s a new age. And I got some rage…

Yeabs: You stole Harold’s rap!

Hugoo Yubawoba: Yes. I am the one who stole his microphone too. I claimed the cat stole it. Hahahaha. I have been antagonizing people for so long. And you think I actually want to be a cat? Why would you want that? You think so little of me. I’m fed up. Look at the computer.

Yeabs: 340 monthly listeners for “Joe Da King.” For one song called Blood Fuse. Huh…

Hugoo Yubawoba: If that asshole Harold ever releases his rap, he is gonna get god damn exposed as a stealer.

July Rainy: But you’re the thief.

Hugoo Yubawoba: Yeah… But it’s a cat eat cat world.

Isuldi: Listen brother, I’m sorry. I never treated you with respect. But you need to join my movement.

Hugoo Yubawoba: Screw your movement, it’s as bad as any movement. There’s no point to anything at all but to antagonize the fools who will never know what it is like to be son of man. They will never know. Nobody ever treats son of man good. That’s history.

Isuldi: No, Numob is the true son of man and he is you. You need to see the light and be who you once were. Modernity has cursed us all. It cursed the one who is supposed to be the hero, and turned him into an antihero.

July Rainy: No, I think he’s a full-on villain!

Hugoo Yubawoba: Remember this. Nothing politicians do will ever matter. You don’t even care about my brother’s movement. How could you if you never even read the book of Numob? You don’t even know what it’s about.

Isuldi: But you haven’t read it either.

Hugoo Yubawoba: I have… Many times. And I see nothing in it.

Isuldi: But it’s your story! You are Numob! Don’t you get it?!

Hugoo Yubawoba: Fine, I’ll get on with this Numob business if I have a threesome with these two.

Isuldi: NOOOOOOO!!!!!!! How could Numob act like this?!

Hugoo Yubawoba: Hahahahahahahahahaha. Isn’t it Zhamashura like you said? I hate this politician’s hairdo. And I like Yeabs, it’s exactly like you said. Half bored, half engaged. Will this be the most spiritual moment of all times?!

Isuldi: We are gonna have to be Numobists, without Numob… The great Numob could have never made it in these times…

Back to Bootis commentary. Holy crap, this is the best movie I have ever seen! It has a great message… It’s genius. The three siblings are geniuses of different kinds. Well I respect this movie too much for me to want to put a full transcript here for you to see. I’m watching the rest of it alone.

It’s been 8 hours. And wow, what a great movie. I just finished watching it. And I have changed… I believe in Numobism, I can’t believe they saved Hugoo Yubawoba but he still managed to do his hobby of antagonizing people. I can’t believe July Rainy had an orgy with so many politicians and they all died of a man-made STD made by Hugoo Yubawoba. That was so funny. And best of all, Sauerkrat had no sex scenes. And Harold, well he really did some great rapping later in the movie. I’d like to know who came up with the raps for that. Perhaps it was Sauerkrat! And Numobism really changed the world in the movie. Let’s read some reviews for this movie. “This movie is idiotic and made by someone who has no fucking clue how the world works. You can’t just make a political ideology based on a fake religion and suggest it is a legitimate ideology. Plus, nobody in the right mind would find Sauerkrat Wansson attractive. Sorry, but it’s true. Stay with the political side you are on, and don’t go with this nonsense. Numobism is the greatest threat to not just America, but the world. Plus these raps are so lame compared to Sancho.” This review was written by a guy named Dick Sullivan. Hmm… Me and Sauerkrat must defile Sancho’s music by being featured on it a lot so Dick Sullivan becomes a practical cuckold.

Laurence of India

Chapter 1 The River

Written on November 26 2025

“You can look, but you better not touch, boy!” said the Indian girl Dhanya to Bruce Springsteen in 1979 for which he gaspered a brass sounding “Oool massini yah greenie ban oo wah. Sasini, yatuwa, ba kini, vanso yah aba,” with his eyes closed and hands pressed against each other like the moles he met. Dhanya was shaken in her orange dress attire with patterns that Bruce Springsteen could not describe, for he has little care for such things.

“What are the words you speak? They sound ancient, of a life long lost…” utters the Dhanya Bundubar.

“An illuminating sound, isn’t it? Oo ballek.. Illuminating like the sun, pressed against the world… I drank from the riverflow. Spat some out, it hit on my elbow. Now I know what I should not know. For there are places, which are not where we go,” shakes Bruce Springsteen out of his voice like maraca beans was the components of his tongue. Gasper, trickling darts from the mad man through where there used to be stars.

“GAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! We will kill you Bruce Springsteen! Taking our women like that,” a man manned his mouth and that was the management. He managed to man the mouth in a manner of many a possibility. Darts were in his middle name.

The Napoleon son let go and tidied his mind with the tempest quake. For he knew there was a way to give a good handshake. But this is foreign land, will this work or will he fall in the sand?

“I reject it. Teenager locked in springtime, I am a king who you MIGHT have heard of, you ASS! Everything I touch turns to gold!” said the man with the twiddly mustache of tricksters and the hat of bowling nights.

“You cannot reject the ties that bind, King Mightass…” said Bruce Springsteen.

“Perhaps I may, for the lady caught me sparky eye.” said Mightass.

Bruce Springsteen hollered and encouraged them to do whatever it is they would do in song, it came out of his mouth as his eyes illuminated in pleasant lands. He left the sandy shore for he was not the watcher of the guys.

Laurence Huy was a 26 year old power salesman born in 1999 who hated Bruce Springsteen because he was described as “Heartland Rock” which he had no idea of what that even meant but he had a feeling it was something sleazy. He had a problem with the gangsters outside his business where they played sleazy violin music. He had a feeling that was what Bruce Springsteen was. People used his shop as a sex palace for the floor wood was good. Many wanted to invite him but he was not interested in any of them for they never bought anything.

“Come on yussie… We got pussy! Yuh!” said Jackal Bones.

“What do you want from me? You think I’m impressed by some hammy thing? I’ve seen pigs before. A girl I used to know showed me pigs all the time. There is nothing for me. Show me the best you have ever seen, even if it is photographic. I don’t know what there is to see,” says Laurence Huy while looking at the ceiling fan which has some lights on it which have a complex light pattern of polyrhythmic fertilization.

Jackal Bones opened his eyes wide and showed his top teeth only.

Laurence did not give a damn for he wanted to see the best picture he ever seen and all he heard was what the thought was a street version of “Heartland Rock,” and he never cared about pirates because he saw a cartoon with kid pirates and that threw him off into a neverending runaway from the sight of something buck toothed and a golden.

“Do you want power or not? Legend has it that sexual intercourse is all about power. I am a power salesman if you don’t know anything about me which I’m sure that is you,” said Laurence.

Jackal had a bursting gun of never asked questions. “What are you, an Illuminati? Who else has power? How could anybody be a power salesman? What does that even entail? What is your business even about? Have you ever sold anything to anybody?”

Laurence knew the answer to it all. “Illuminati is what I have been waiting for. I have been patient, running this business of myths to discourage people. Some have paid the price. All I want to do is demoralize this world, like an Illuminati man. Will they let me see the stars? Anyways I just give some pills and some simple lessons. I’m a millionaire.”

Jackal wanted to see what he could see, and if this mystery could bring him out of his misery of never knowing. “Give me the pills, all of them. I’ve been missing out on what the rest of wise world has seen!”

Laurence said “Don’t be a fool. These pills don’t do anything except give you retrograde ejaculation and some other stuff. You have a respectable style and you keep your pants on.”

Retrograde ejaculation was what was desired by many of the nation. Never impregnable, it was the ultimate birth control. Little did Laurence know, these pills made an Indian-American man a billionaire for he sold them by telling people what it truly is. He was a member of the Illuminati for real, with his theory that the retrograde ejaculation would leave the ladies irritated with no absorption. He wanted riots of looting, murder, and what else he thought was roight.

Laurence closed the place and trapped the hoors and hoorettes inside. Bruce Springsteen would call this a “Jackson Cage,” which he invented on the side of the Vietcong. Nobody seemed to mind except the neighbors. Laurence came home to Suzie who was just a roommate and nothing more. But she got the hots for Laurence but he didn’t seem to care. Not until she changed her hair...

“Why is your hair a triangle?” wondered Laurence aloud. It was a pyramid above the scalp like a dunce hat but yellow.

“Think about it hard,” said Suzie Berzins.

“You want me to take you to Egypt and this is a hint,” said Laurence as he looked at the ceiling fan, not as good as the one in his store. He always felt like he let Suzie down by not letting her see the lights of polyrhythm. But Suzie is a fan of Bruce Springsteen so she doesn’t need polyrhythm to be happy.

“No… But you know the answer so search deep in your soul since I would be shunned if I told you the answer,” said Suzie with her finger on her cheek.

He thought about it all day the next day including at the time he saw the construction workers drilling the ground just to make a hole for children to play in. He asked a construction worker about the question in his mind and yelled over the drill which made him sound angry which left the construction worker in anger too. Bruce Springsteen would say “two hearts are better than one,” if he were here but he is underground currently. Laurence sat on a bench near a pond and fed himself. Ladies asked him if he was ok and he asked them if they ever saw someone with a triangular haircut. One said they themselves had a triangle haircut but it wasn’t the same, not even close. He retaliated in anger at what he perceived as lies and the lady felt as if she were shot point blank right between the curls of their hair. It was his day off. This could be a problem because the people stuck inside would’ve figured they would be out soon. But they have been abandoned and screwing isn’t gonna ease the pain of ol’ Laurence not caring about their feelings. Not even the ones he liked a little bit were on his mind for he didn’t like them that much and he could forget about them. People cried at Laurence’s actions. He farted and it was a fart that could be heard round the world by the ears exclusively of those who he has treated in a twisted manner. Nothing will ever be the same for a new batch. He saw a homeless man and thought he could have wisdom. He had no teeth of that kind, but also no wisdom of the other kind and he was also not kind. Laurence knocked over the coin jar. The homeless man didn’t seem to care and just picked it back up. Laurence then tried to stomp the face of Bruce Springsteen that was plastered alongside the cup.

“Why is it everywhere I go, it’s Bruce Springsteen?! This is a demoralization campaign!” said Laurence.

The homeless man chuckled and clapped his hands for the rest of the day. But Laurence did not know that he did that because he left after he made his statement. The clapping annoyed many people and did not get him any donations. He said in his head that he did not care though. Eventually he imitated a sitar with his mouth, reminding him of older days.

It was time for a plan of seduction. But Suzie knew he always wanted to be an Illuminati member which he wasn’t. “Who would even want to be with a non-Illumina?” he felt. Then he realized he didn’t care if she wasn’t an Illuminati member. He went home and turned on the television which was set to Bruce Springsteen. He decided to watch it to analyze the demoralization campaign from a thoughtful perspective. Then he heard it, the Illuminati messaging from the lyrics of Bruce Springsteen. All the suffering he heard, he knew Bruce Springsteen was stating stories of suffering that he caused. He guffawed for 32 seconds and was glad he had something else to talk to her about. He kept on watching.

Suzie came into the apartment after working as an actor in a Disney sitcom called “Goobuffoon” which today she got fired from for having a different haircut without asking which the writers were not pleased about, and they cancelled the show entirely which ruined the days of millions of Americans.

“Now I see why you like Bruce Springsteen! He’s an Illuminati agent!” says Laurence.

“Of course, but the music is also good,” says Suzie.

“I like the music too, it’s very mocking and circus-like without sounding that much like a circus. It is the work of genius,” says Laurence.

“Well I’m glad… Anyway did you figure out the answer to the obvious riddle?” says Suzie.

“Obvious?!?! It isn’t obvious why your hair is triangular. Well you made it that shape to get fired so the Illuminati might make you a member,” says Laurence.

That’s not necessarily the order of which certain things have happened,” says Suzie.

Then it hit him! Like a hammer into the dangling grandfather clock which led to the falling of a million maraca beans which were in there just to make the clock sound annoying!

“So you did this to become an Illuminati member, and you’re a member already!” said Laurence.

“You figured it out and you also figured out another person who is Illuminati. It’s time you join us, well tomorrow.” said Suzie.

“Yeah, I think I need to free those people in my building or I could get arrested first, also your haircut looks cool anyhoo,” says Laurence.

“You can do that tomorrow morning, after all they’re probably sleeping already,” says Suzie.

Well as Bruce Springsteen would say, the ties that bind have tied together and their hungry hearts became two hearts which are better than one and also they were not dancing in the dark because the lights were on. Bruce Springsteen wouldn’t approve of them dancing in the light for it does not resonate with the bleakness of the world. But he can forgive these little students of the illuminating ways.

“GOOBUFFOON IS RUINED!!!!! I’ve been screwing with my sister’s tampons because she said it’s good that the cancellation happened and I shouldn’t be watching that show because it isn’t funny. What does she know about comedy? Has she ever laughed? No, she hasn’t. She is a fucking lowlife idiot,” is the review that Bruce Springsteen watched on this merry night underground hanging with the moles.

“Why don’t we make our own TV show, boss?” says Swanson, one of Springsteen’s assistants.

“SILENCE!!!! These two will be my new assistants from now on! You old men don’t know squat! How will that make a difference? My acting is too good anyways. The ties that bind us have broken a long time ago. Much like the tampon that this savant’s sister is gonna put in her one July morning,” says Bruce Springsteen.

Bruce Springsteen grabbed his guitar and played a punk version of one of his songs, “Jackson Cage,” screaming and they opened the door as fast as they could and left after hearing the first few notes. They knew when they hear that song, danger is a-brewing for a “Jackson Cage” is a gruel invention of war.

Chapter 2 Blue Condition

Written on December 2 2025

“Cumalum!!! Hey Yak Betty cumalum, Yak Betty had a style cumalum…” sang those in the heartland Jersey where the fuckers lived. We wanted to cum in not a bum but the forefathers taught them they should want to cum in a bum. Was it the Illuminati who made those tapes of anus fudging but not with leaking fudge of the brownstone, not a cone but another 3D shape well known? The foul tapes that Eric Clapton fans didn’t want? Who wanted it? Surely not Bruce Springsteen fans. But the fans of those whose favorite rockers and rappers and folkers all the other cockers tootin round little white lies out of their dingaling into the canary who might not be the rock remover who gets it off of you. But hey, people wanted to CUM… The rapper Lilly Stevens was a fucker of the night. He challenged ol Eric Clapton to a motherfucking duel and told him the only sex toys he could use to seduce the womans were those in his fucking toolshed. Like a rake, yeah too bad he has a fucking black rake lanky as fuck with pricks that I guess you could use to do some violence. “Would that get your rocks off?” wondered Eric Clapton in the night as he looked at little Suzie who was visiting for a self-made ghost mission. Oh yeah and the duel between Stevens and Clapton was the duel of the FUX. “Fuck all you hos,” was the clip that Clapton cut apart from the chant of power that Lilliot Hankie Stevens was embracing with the fiery flames of his bracers to make him look bad and cruel. But he said he was gonna fuck all the hos in Jersey. Somewhere in the universe there is an old man waiting. For Eric Clapton and Bruce Springsteen to guitar duel and the loser releases the sex tapes they have… And they can listen to the guitar duel of the ages for the rest of their lives. He is waiting… This duel is the only one they can find as they bite with their free hand in the sand. But who even knew such a thing would happen? Lilly Stevens, who is he? Who the fuck cares… He might let the old man free themselves from the problems of their physical education nest (Where the middle aged fat man goes around telling them what to do) thanks to this diss function for Lilly Stevens is rapping a fiery blaze with the blunts that he circumcised for the thrill of challenge. Eric Clapton is more motivated than he was when he cried in heaven. Some say Lilliot boy is an invention of the Trumanali, a branch of the Illuminati who sundered due to their evil ways. Fucking putting witchy varmints up the ass of some demonic scum just to get them to sing more annoyingly to disrupt the ears of the young man and woman who just wanted peace but the interruptors go around with their best impression of the varmints control. It’s like a ghost that they made on their own is in their control center to get you to want to KILL!!!! If you kill, there will be tears in heaven. And with the prison system, you won’t be writing a song like Tears In Heaven, no chance. The only thing you can do is read, and guess what books the Trumanali got for you. Some outdated books about sex positions from the 1980s. Heh… And people really want to see those Eric Clapton sex tapes from the 1970s?! He didn’t even know how to do the Springsteen Manuel Sanchez Fargus yet. Fine, only Illuminati members know how to do that. And fine, Swanson and Nash were impressed by the video of Laurence and Suzie even though their methods were outdated. Illuminati members aren’t embracing the new knowledge THAT YOU SHOULD KNOW. If you have been watching Illuminati children motivating television, that four word phrase should bring you tears from heaven. Eric Clapton moved to Jersey a long time ago. He wanted to bop with Bruce Springsteen’s “ho,” as he digged from the slang that young Lilly Stevens said in his song that sampled “Tears In Heaven,” and he changed the tune into a pussy pumping tune for delinquents. Eric Clapton wouldn’t admit he used it as a tool like a radar that brings fishes in with an automatic green cyber reel that is invisible but green if it was visible. Suzie was not interested in the banging of Eric Clapton but he needed to try. She was on a ghost mission! It was time to interfere with this feud that few delinquents even care about. Lilly Stevens isn’t that popular with delinquents because he is too fat and his smile is too friendly. But he is popular with the goodie two shoes of America though they still tell people to fuck off. But they aren’t delinquents whatsoever. Eric Clapton was ready to get a raga going on like old days for Suzie brought in the sitar to his house where the lights were off but don’t be alarmed for there will be no dancing in the dark. Eric Clapton prefers to play sitting down anyway. But did he know that Indians were hated in this time period? Is that so? Yes… This was the saddest sabotage of all time. Suzie didn’t want to do it but she had to for Eric Clapton was dangerous like a MOAB that could bomb Bruce Springsteen’s nutsack, to never come again. He was a very violent man, many such as Manny, a former fan say. His song was called “Wishful Wishywashy” which goes a little like this. Chugga chugga bowwwww bowwww yanggg yanggg dunda diddly dundun bow bowwww bowww buh buh BUNG…. Dududududududu…. And the sitar riff sounds like it’s saying FUCK and SHIT. Wow… “Wishful wishywashy up your ass. Spackle up some soap and shove it up your ass. Does it pleasure you, you fucker fucker fool? Wash it with soap like your cock smegma smegma fucking ghoul. How does it feel to be in such an ugly thieving soul? I wouldn’t want to be next to your latest ice cream bowl. You use your own cum as soap because it looks the same to your useless eyes that cannot see distinctions, what even is its functions?” That’s the opening verse and then he repeats this line “You have dildos in your shed. Think you can pleasure a woman with it? Use your head,” then eventually he screams it. Then a sitar solo where it sounds like it’s saying swears. And well, Suzie makes some moaning sounds but it’s not the most passionate. Well the moaning sounds is the drum beat of the song. Actually pretty innovative roight? Laurence doesn’t know about the plans but he will wake up to a creamy morning of the former Cream member singing some funny song and also a thing called poonalaylay as the waiting disillusioned old men say, will come and also something that will come tomorrow will be a diss that kinda sounds like C.R.E.A.M.

Dhanya’s son Ayan was listening to the song of Eric Clapton in India. “Will this save us?” said Ayan. Dhanya said “Bruce Springsteen will save us. Only he can… Not this Eric Clapton fook…” India was in shambles thanks to Trumanali plans to sabotage the race that made up most of the non-sundered Illuminati branches. Trumanali laughs in the face of those who trololololoed the “pussies and the anti-gaming sentiment spreaders of the Earth universe,” as stated by Indian philosopher Siddha Anand. Some say Indians only play mobile games. But do they know? What do they know about mobile games? Do they know every one that exists? How could you pass judgement on them all if you do not know all? Who knows? I do… For all you know, Indians could be playing the most strategic game in the Earthverse and also it probably has moralizing pictures in it of those in the blender of the styles that the cabaret clubs in Japan would love to hire. But only as a reward for strategic mastermind power… And the encryption was Illuminati funded and more secure than any cybersecurity phony with an easy job any privy brown painted penguin with human hair molester could do with pussy on their mind. Ayan listened to Cream behind his mama’s back. Eric Clapton was his hero, and he considered himself an agekin for he was an old man in a young man’s body. He was waiting in the gardens for the sex tapes to be released. He didn’t care if his hero lost. He would win either way. No need for a blue conditioner as a lube anyway. He always was proud to be born in India because he was not circumcised unlike the high percentage rate that could happen if born in the heartland or other lands in the USA, but he is more of a Clapton fan than a Springsteen fan, something he would regret in the future, except for the rare probability that he will have a different point of view with the knowledge I know. The prevalence of circumcision in the USA is one of the most regrettable things that Bruce Springsteen did, well that of which he allowed to continue in his position. But the youth of America isn’t getting any brighter. Perhaps the parents will have to be the ones who are the saviors and the teachers to the children in this faulty time period where the Illuminati should be the teachers… But he was unaware of the true raiser which is innate to the illuminating saintly children.

Of course Clapton lost and he was forced to release the sex tapes. Luckily he did some video game streaming in the past so he is gonna put the archived stream audio over the tapes to piss viewers off. “NO GETTIN’ OFF TO THE VOICE OF MY WIVES AND GROUPIE COLLECTION,” he stammered. Lilly Stevens wanted to see them too and he had a bunch of hos lined up to watch with him, a movie night of kissy kissy all over the body though with googly eyes looking away from the skin. Luckily Clapton was one of the streamers who don’t even talk about the game while playing so there will be no suspicions as he talks like a typical rambling old man. But wait, old man he thought… These are tapes from the 60s all the way to the 20s. Why would I have this gruffy old voice over the tapes of old? He decided to just let the inconsistency fly. Maybe he is so senile that he would just accidentally record audio over some tapes that many imagined he watched all the time every day and every night and it would be the inspiration of many of his songs, the little details of the couch, and the flower pot and the flowers within, oh yeah and the poon too when it’s visible.

Suzie did chop up the sexiest sex tape that Clapton had in his collection making the vagina look like it was anatomically incorrect with the pussy in the front like a third face though cyclops which may sometimes be covered like they were a modern day hooded gangster, staring at you or the cloth. We all know the breasts and belly button are the second face, unless you have breast cancer. It made the people really wonder.

Laurence was ready to become an Illuminati after skimming through the Clapton tapes for 7 minutes which he didn’t care much for.

Chapter 3 Part 1 Robuxian Part 1

Written on December 3 and 4 and 12 and 13 2025

“Robux robux YAY!!!!!” said the children against the walls of the vestibule of Molia, which looked as if it were a supermole’s burrow. Laurence was here with Suzie and they had their arms “locked,” some say. Santa was here and this was a demoralization campaign. He wanted the children to feel bad that an old man had to pretend to be a person who doesn’t exist and get them to cry because many children cry when they see somebody smile for it isn’t accurate with the times. He was giving out robux but he knew these Illuminati nepotismal children did not like the Roblox software that much. Why would an Illuminati educated child even want to play with regular Joes, or those Vanderbilt cockadookie dildo hounds?! Is Roblox an Illuminati invention?! No… It was invented by a Japanese outcast who was fed up with every style of Japanese gaming. David Bazuki, the little charmer who fooked his way up to the top of a company made by himself. How did he do it? Well it’s a little like a monkey climbing a vine. You just do it. You might fall. Laurence was aware of Roblox but had no thoughts on it. Little does he know there are wine drinking people in their late 20s playing it that he would be on a quest to kill furthering him from his plans. To be an illuminating saint or a killer of the night? The answer lies bright… David Bazuki cocked up the shit and fucked hos at night. He was a killer of the night in a different way. He killed the mood with some ideas that he gathered from Trumanali Head Generator articles claiming to be from a grandma who is a sex master. Years ago, Laurence put grandmas as an enemy in one of his amateur video games that he never finished. So he would never take such advice. The Trumanali have the greatest pumps and convincing vein markers. David Bazuki could’ve been one of them had he been a more controversial figure but alas he plays it safe all the time except at night where he is putting beads on a fan’s neck. But they do not watch the skyscraper window that often and the time he puts on the modern Bruce Springsteen soul music to intensify the mood, the Trumanali are too busy working. Bazuki was shunned back in Japan all those years ago when he was a schoolboy picking up flowers and putting them on the slide as a show. They knew he didn’t have the spirit of Japan in him. Bazuki is a sad man. He hates the game he made and plays the strategic game the Indians play. Only he never sees the bigger picture that the game contains because he is no strategic mastermind… As he grew he lost his Japanese looks. I guess they could sniff him after all. What did he smell like? The Illuminati database has no information, not that it would help me as the terms they use for smells are too technical. What if he is a Trumanali? Hmm….

Laurence had Roblox on his mind in the elevator as the kids continued to pretend they liked it and he heard them until the door closed. He knew the children were the future and especially the Illuminati children. Though he was afraid that the Illuminati would have molesters in it. He remembered once at therapy that his mother Sweet Honey Robinshine who adopted him forced him to go to at age 19, he accused the therapist of being a pedophile when she laughed at a bad joke that he purposefully said as a test and stated his theory: “You are a pedophile, Jenny for liking my so-called joke which was not funny in any manner and very cliche. Most people are probably pedophiles since they like too many things that it’ll get out of hand. You’re telling me that out of the billions of humans, you don’t like a single one of the people under age 18?! Why don’t you do therapy for them? Too afraid of what you know you are. And what about the many 20-40 year olds who many pretend are 18 years old when jacking it because they could be that age if you didn’t know. And well you know that you look like a 12 year old too. Well I am glad to say I am not a pedophile because I’ve seen many children in my time and was never interested. Though never interested in any adult either… Heh. Well ha, I am above you and everything you stand for. Anyone who is attracted to a human is a pedophile anyway the way I see it, the only solution is to be attracted to a species that has no distinction, which you as an Illuminati funded bitch should be working on getting them to work on fixing. Genetically modify the blood flows…” Jenny tried to sook (as she’d say to sound cute which did a sliver of help) to prove she was no pedophile, but the facade was seen through… And like never before, he felt like he was born to run. Was that really what happened? Laurence didn’t really remember because he didn’t think it was that important of a memory so he barely thought about it. But he thought that he wouldn’t remember the moment at all if all that didn’t happen.

The elevator went down. He was silent the whole time and so was Suzie. This was the most emotional moment of Laurence’s life. You’d think he wouldn’t want to watch those Eric Clapton sex tapes and listen to those diss songs before the greatest meeting. He will meet his hero that he only liked for less than 24 hours.

“Laurence, you’re a cool fellow. Owning that store, what a weird but cool thing… I never saw it in all the years it’s been here,” said Bruce Springsteen.

“Thanks, sir. But I don’t really like that store… It was a bad plan that I came up with my mother Honey… I didn’t really contribute my best ideas because they were too illuminating,” explained Laurence while scratching his head and looking at the ground.

“Stand tall, or baby don’t stand at all, but don’t worry. Some day you’ll look back on this and it will all seem funny,” chuckled Bruce Springsteen.

“I could’ve been in the Illuminati so many years earlier…” moped Laurence. Suzie chimed in, “It’s not easy to join the Illuminati at all. Unless you’re one of those kids born into it, roight?!”

Bruce Springsteen said “Hey, it’s not easy finding recruits. We could adopt children and educate them, but those busty Mariannes running the center can sniff us and tell we’re not here to be a parent, guess it’s something about the way we walk, heh,”

Laurence was afraid the Illuminati wasn’t as powerful as he thought. Wouldn’t they be powerful enough to charm the adoption center workers into giving the children away? Wouldn’t some of them be smart enough to biologically engineer a creature?

Bruce Springsteen chuckled and said no word after as he went around the room and started gathering the tools to play a solo concert for the two of them. And he did.

Bruce Springsteen had a computer where he wrote some notes about the two after the show. Then he left and told them to have fun and he’ll be back in a jiffy. Laurence went on the computer to try out Roblox and see if it was as good as Santa and the kids were saying. He said he thought all the pictures on the game selection screen were as demonic as gaping people with annoying eyes. Swanson came out of the closet where he was hiding to explain what he did in Roblox to have fun. He showed them an Illuminati funded soundboard of a 20 year old woman with millions of phrases said in different inflections. Did she deserve to do this for a whole year? Many will argue but this was pre-Springsteen. She was a World War II prisoner of war. They used this soundboard to help them win the war because she sounded attractive in those times. But now it’s time to use the soundboard to troll. Nobody finds this sound attractive anymore. The two did not question who Swanson was. Well he clicked some buttons very fast to get to the point where he can do what he wants to do which as the good times rolled, he trolled some degenerates for a while and encouraged them to do the same with the power of creativity, just think about any sentence that has been uttered in World War II times and chances are the soundboard has it. “Great Illuminati business,” said Swanson and then he went upstairs hoping Bruce Springsteen never knew he was in there. He doesn’t know that Bruce Springsteen doesn’t want to put him in a Jackson Cage sincerely.

Recollection of the great trolling will be a sperm bank encaged in the two’s minds as if they were done by a sage, but Swanson was just like a swan singing without knowing music theory. What was said, it started in a toolshed. Two degenerates were banging in the toolshed with fetishistic schisms relating to a rake. Then the German lady said in the body of Bruce Springsteen, a typical nag: “What is this racket?” A curly haired stooge said “Bruh you sound like a girl still,” She replied “You are a sourpuss.” Beating with the rake came, the object of which was actually spawned in by a hacker because this game sucks and is just a hangout for degenerates without strategic item placement from the developers, a staple of many games such as arena shooters. Swanson had the hacks too though. He winked at the two and explained that the rake was spawned in by him years ago and the server still has not shut down because they all want to be sexophoning even in the schoolway halls and thine shrine in the shopping malls. Swanson hacked a penis sucking minigame exclusive to this server ages ago. It is a game of pure fantasy as the game revolves around catching jizz with a tongue which you control like a whip. Nobody can jizz for hours straight in the real world and no Illuminati technologician or potion master has even tried to make it a reality for they knew it would probably lead to side effects in the body. And the jizzer just plays a typical one-button rhythm game to unleash jizz. The google search results all wonder why only sometimes they get to play the sex minigame when playing the game. A YouTube channel called “Mythbusters: Roblox Edition” has made a video saying that there is no penis sucking minigame in this Roblox game which is just a town and a city and the game is called “The Town and the City.” Many tears have appeared on bedspreads due to not being able to play the game of human connection for it only is one server. Anyways the rake in question then became a dildo shoved up the guy’s ass and it bled and the Illuminati generator of pictures generated images of his Roblox avatar turned into a realistic human having a gory death, shown on his computer screen. Illuminati is too that of a godheart to make it a computer virus. But they did force a screenshot so he will see it again if he ever opens his files and checks his downloads. He will be too scared to play the game again, the chances are 97% percent calculated by a reluctant scientist who said he wanted to make potions instead of work on doing something not dissimilar to sports betting chance calculating. Missy of the 1940s was saying much during all the fiasco: “Hey. Bobby Soxer. Why don’t you be with me? Doll.” The girl who was with the curly haired boy said “I’d love to, but can you reset as a female avatar? You sound like a girl so…” Female anime Bruce Springsteen entered the zone and the dead boy was soon to be a cuckold. The game said that he would respawn in 5 minutes but that was a lie and as the dead body on screen became more translucent, he saw that he was a cuckold as they banged near his dead body which did not disgust them because all they saw was very cartoony on their end. When the fake timer passed, the Illuminati’s 1986 project, “the scariest image ever” was unleashed upon them. Nobody ever even screenshots this scary image when it is unleashed upon them even though it is genius from an artistic standpoint. It was not automatically screenshotted by the “hack mod” because it should not be spread and be given as a cyberweapon for peasants. Swanson turned on the album “Not Available” by The Residents in the room’s record player to assist him in prayer towards the idea of this guy killing some degenerates of another kind in furious rage in the real world, in real time.

Laurence and Suzie were encouraged to do some fun of their own. They did but it was mostly just them being annoying. The girl who Swanson banged followed them around and they beat her with the rake but never killed her, making sure her health bar was at the lowest it could be, knowing that another rake strike would kill them. She got too clingy and wanted to play the cooperative penis sucking minigame which would overlay the display and they would be confined and the trolling victims could run away so they just killed her as it was an easy solution and she saw a gory image of the same nature too on her screen.

Is it very wrong for Swanson to wish death upon deemed degenerates? Not even Bruce Springsteen knows because the Illuminati philosophers haven’t been doing a good job coming up with philosophical revelations lately. They’re too busy jacking off honestly, if you ask me. But I must defend Swanson, as I believe he is a good man. He did not have an erection during the sex trolling.

Chapter 3 Part 2 Robuxian Part 2

Written on December 14 and 16 and 18 2025

Bruce Springsteen came in and saw em’ laffin and heard voices of young adults coming from the computer.

“Whatcha laughing about on the computer? The Clapton sex tapes? ‘Cause his technique is not, oh that’s Roblox. Argh… I know who put you up to this. That little rascal. Cause he always uses that game to troll people on. Thinking about software like that is too much for me. Idiotic school teachers complain about technology, but the software they use is so simple. This software for causing emotional catastrophes is just too damn annoying, having to dress up your character in a way that gets our victims attracted to you… I know how to DO THAT IN REAL LIFE. But not in the way of dressing up a blocky person who doesn’t even have a nose. It’s like having to relearn a lot of crap. I can’t get with these times, you know. I had to pretend I was a fan of Taylor Swift. I lost fans because of it. The whole idea was complimenting her so I would get more fans. Never has a girl drawn an anime version of me, unlike the band ‘Emerson, Lake and Palmer’ who have gotten many cutesy anime versions of them. But screw it, Swanson made an anime Roblox girl version of me as one of the avatars he uses in that software. But fuck… Girls these days aren’t attracted to me or even past versions of me, it isn’t heartwarming. Someone dressed me up like a lesbian butch as a potential strategy. Let’s just say he’s in a fucking Jackson Cage, nah he’s in something much worse that someone else invented but it is heavily based upon my invention. At least the communist lasses are attracted to me. One of our organization philosophers, Fitzapo Gusto Reinlaer says Donald Trump might be a secret communist. I pray, I pray…” says Bruce Springsteen.

“Very interesting, boss, but explain what a Jackson Cage is to Laurence, eh?” says Suzie.

“It’s just a city that feels like jail. I know the song,” says Laurence.

“No, I made the song much more tame lyricswise. I named it after the Jackson 5, a band I once was fond of but as the war grew and I vacationed in Vietnam as I was never drafted, I became a member of the Vietcong by accident. I hung out with North Vietnam, South Vietnam, and USA. An Illuminati member of the Vietcong showed me a bunch of materials and told me to make an invention with it. I never did anything like that before. I am no scientist or inventor, but he believed in me. That’s not the first time someone believed in me for something scientific or mathematical, once a kid thought I could solve a full Rubik’s cube just because I could solve one side. This time I was believed in by someone who seemed smarter and more picturable about my capabilities. The Jackson 5 were not Illuminati but adjacent to the movement. But I found out by Hue, the guy who hired me, that the Jackson 5 and their team were some conniving people who desperately wanted to enter the Illuminati for bad reasons. They treated becoming a member of the Illuminati like getting a PhD, the original concept they focused on was ‘being pedophile hunters with Michael and potentially the other brothers as the bait,’ the Illuminati were not interested in their style. Nowadays the ‘pedophile hunters’ of modern Illuminati often when pretending to be a kid, act mature for their age and are interested in pop culture from the predator’s childhood time period, however many predators in the past two or three decades are into modern pop culture. The Jackson 5 team thought they could make Michael some dumb kid who doesn’t know crap and that would do a good job at baiting. They had random guys on the street spreading rumors saying his father abused him which was true but they said it to get people interested in being a savior of a kid who would be in love with them. This was a horrible strategy, deemed the Illuminati. So they made Michael say he liked classical music and stuff to make him seem smarter. He did become smarter for real eventually though. But the Jackson 5 team is always bitter that they never joined the Illuminati. But let’s go back to the day I invented the Jackson Cage. I saw those rusty bars and brass gears on the table and I was thinking ‘what if we made this a cage where the gears spin on the ground which scrapes your foot while you’re squatting trying to fit in the cage?’ We put paintings of the Jackson 5 on a wall part of the cage, and the rest of the cage was metal bars and a metal rectangle as the roof and the floor was a metal rectangle border with gears as the floor, and it was not laid bare flat so you rotate around like a carnival ride… But it was rotating as you touch the sides of it and it damn hurt your feet. There was not enough width in the cage to sit criss-cross applesauce so you had to squat. The gears were big and we made it part of a table that we put under the cage. So just imagine a bunch of guys in cages on top of a table. They’re squatting on the table but your eyes are at the same level, assuming they’re looking at you and not the Jackson 5. The reason we put pictures of them in the cage was just to make these idiots believe we were associated with those people. Well no offense to the singers in the family, we’re more against the team they had but nobody would recognize them and besides the singers were at least partially into the Illuminati idea. We played Jackson 5 music at high volumes to the prisoners of war which they hated. But I felt bad for some of them and moved the table that had the good ones outside to the jungle and played some of my own songs. There's a reason why I was reluctant to do stripped-down versions of my songs in my early career. I invented punk too, my original version of Jackson Cage’s lyrics had me insulting the prisoners of war that the Vietcong particularly disliked. So that’s pretty much the story of the Jackson Cage.”

Suzie was playing Roblox but they were playing the penis sucking minigame from the side of the one who was getting the penis sucked, but when the story of the Jackson Cage was done, she stopped the minigame before the sucker could orgasm in real life as the minigame could be played with one hand and the free hand can be used for the typical method of a self-induced orgasm. After they stopped and heard the rage, the victim was presented with a violent rakey death. Suzie closed the game next. Laurence was listening intently to Bruce Springsteen as he told the story. The moans he heard from the computer speakers, he just imagined they were the moans of the people in the Jackson Cages.

“That minigame made me feel dirty, not because of its sexual content but because of its shallow gameplay,” complained Suzie, she then realized quickly, “but the game is supposed to be played by degenerates, so let them suffer.” Laurence nodded his head to those remarks, he then said “Great story, Mr. Springsteen. It was extremely interesting. I used to sleep in history class, you know.”

“I do know, I know a lot about you,” says Bruce Springsteen, “but don’t think I’m too impressed, you’ve wasted a lot of time. But you are a hero, that’s what matters, you don’t find those often. Blind faith will get you killed, but my faith in you I see with all my sight, and I see it despite the fact it’s bright.”

Left to right, a ding dong tick tocked. Whose was it?! Laurence fell asleep and had too much to dream, he saw himself on a big flying ship with a rifle on his hips. Batoowwww… was the flickity sound of the flicking tricking ticking machine he held with his hand and the back of it was going up his sleeve, like a train of rice that fell down there. He was in a desert place. “LAAHAROOOOO!!!!” scimitars clashed against sawblades of red haired Rockathoners, here for the Rockathon of Indies. “Rodnayyy Sawblades in the hoose, move your caboose, VRRMMMM!!!” chattered the teeth of the red haired maniac who looked like the kind of guy to sit in a public pool and make his daughters sit on his legs instead of lettin’ em swim loose and find some fishies that savage boy put in the water. But this was Rockathon, not some mere damn pool party with some Jesus looking asshole. “Shaddap loony boy. Fucker hoor shit. That’s some fucking fuck shit. Sitar? What are we some hippie fucks? We rock!!! Get off the caboose. NOOOOOWW…” panted Rodney Sawblades like a pup gone wild. Sitar wielded raggedy raggers were raging in a raga. They were ragging on Rodney Sawblades and his band Sawblade who were the motherfuckers of the night. But they were like “soggy ass shit ain’t gonna do me no good.” They tried to stick it in deep somehow. But now it was time Laurence made an entrance. But then there were girls of dandiness with dandelions on their buttoned shirts. That was all fine and dandy but Rodney Sawblades cut one up with a sawblade when they stole a sitar instead of stealing his signature guitar which has a pattern on it of sawblades. He was thinking it was not something to protect and neither was his ding. He is circumcised and the Indian mothers treated him like a bee sting. No unfaithfulness here, this was wartime as Laurence argued as he saw unticked bombs on the damn sands. He was wearing a monocle anyway so the ladies thought he was some robber baron who was trying to steal Indian gold as they shouted out loud to each other as if he could not hear ‘em. But they were stealing sitars. What was he doing in India, he had to go back up to the flying ship and ask the captain. But the ship was foo far away and the ladder was in front of quicksand for an estimated next 8 minutes at the rate of speed it was going… Rockathon was insane and he jumped into the crowd and asked them kindly to use their hands which would be dropping scimitars to the floors and launch him into any one of those assholes on the stage. He didn’t even have sympathy for the sitar wielders because they were playing a raga rock of corporate superficiality just to get poon, nag style, some naggers nag like they are in chant, this is spiritual to some and give a meaning to come. As long as they learn the language of the ladies who come here. Laurence jumped down and got slashed by a scimitar which is different from a sitar, but he grabbed the scimitar of slashing and picked it up and beheaded those buffoonery who were not listening to the launch orders. Would this man ever be the hero of India that Bruce Springsteen thought he could be? He was slashing everybody to death, what a maniac, some said. People from his past were there too, he beheaded them too. This dream was heavily noted in Bruce Springsteen's analysis. He had to get multiple projects analyzing the dream. Freudian tricks were not helpful. Music was a big focus of the dream, and Sigmund Freud has claimed to be unmusical yet has been emotionally moved by some pieces which he deemed an irrational response. The damn Boses weren’t kidnapping him and doing tests on him with an attempt at ultra degenerate music. If I were an Illuminati man in that time period, I’d be king with ease. But this all started with a ding dong moving like the grandfather clock’s tick tock.

The ding dong was Bruce Springsteen’s and he was trying to teach a technique called “Wall Bashing.” Guess it had an effect, perhaps Laurence thought it was a ghost for they painted it pitch white with a black tip for this to not be considered sexual harassment. That’s a cheat code for you stragglers trying to make it in this world, come and get up and get it up too but if you want the same effect, you better make yourself hung upside down with a slightnique. Nobody wants to be circumcised. What is the dullest and bluntest pain? Such that my eyes never close without feeling it there? Whether it is the pain of the beginning or the lack of any feeling in the end… AWOOOOOO…. Wolves howl in the night. All the Jews in the Illuminati have foreskin, they got it back. It was not scientists who gave it back. It was from winning too much from Illuminati gains, alright fine. It was scientists who gave it back. But this is our little secret. It’s just a way to reward ‘em for doing good work in the Illuminati. Many of the Jewishismal Illumina, an afterwork club branch of ours focused on topics such as pretending people are Jewish because they wore or decorated something white and blue, were brought into the whole thing because of rumors they heard about getting the foreskin back. What is the dullest and bluntest pain? The wackathon of the damn circumcised blunt… It’s using a hammer inside a jelly. It is just a weird sensation…

Bruce Springsteen had run off for the analysis. Laurence and Suzie were in Bruce Springsteen’s room. He had pictures of his heroes on the wall. It was the Four Tops, the Easybeats, Bob Dylan, Santa, and many people I don’t know.

“You had a dream, heh... We were watching it with tools,” said Suzie.

Laurence dilly-dallied around and ate a stripe of a moonglow flower in a pot.

“Come on, dood, RODNEY SAWBLADES WAS IN IT?!?! Why didn’t you kill him instead of people who didn’t help you?” wondered Suzie aloud.

“They were pestilent… Is Rockathon real?!?!” asked Laurence as his godheart flowed in his veins.

“It will be soon. So you found out what you have to do, you gotta save India, man…” said Suzie.

“Wahhhh… But why would I dream about India?! I’ve never been there, I never cared about it…” questioned Laurence.

Suzie says “Some Robloxian was dressed up as Rodney Sawblades, remember?!”

It was true… A Rodney Sawblades roleplayer was going around the Robloxian town saying “India is shit. Prove me wrong,” over and over again like he wanted a political debate. He was a hacker too and flew away when they were about to anally rake attack him. They were not experienced with the hacking interface so they could not fly and do what they wanted to do. He flew into the moon. Come on, the moon is extremely important to Hinduism! If you wanted to fly in its direction, you’re a self-hating Hindu in disguise! Just as haters of gaming are self-hating fake gamers in disguise!

Santa came in, fapping Robux with his hand as drops of it fell on the floor. “I overheard you talkin’ Blox. Ain’t talkin ‘bout Fux. We talkin about Bux, yo. Ain’t I swell?” What is the meaning of Santa’s Robux styled lifestyle? Who knows, but why was a picture of him on the wall though? He was playing “Reach Out, I’ll Be There” by the Four Tops with the sound coming out of a purse he was wearing. This is the Illuminati anthem, used to assure heroic children of Illuminati protection. Santa was telling them to reach their hands out to catch some Robux. “We don’t need Robux!” said Laurence. “Haven’t you seen how expensive the best stuff is though?” said Santa. Will this be a duel of the wits?! “I don’t know crap about that… Looks like we have a lot of outfits anyway,” said Laurence. Santa was raging and said “YOU NEED ROBUX!!!!!!!” Suzie accused him of being Trumanali and wanted them to use money laundered Robux to get their account banned and therefore they would be fired by Bruce Springsteen. “I could fuck your brains out!!!! It’s time for a penis measuring contest, STAT! You and me, Laurence boy.” said Santa. Laurence logicced “Don’t we have potions to change the size however you like?! It’s damn folly to compare something like that.” Santa said “You don’t even know what type of member I am. I got micro, you motha. A choice none of you brainwashed gagoons ever choose.” Laurence said he never even chose anything yet. “Choose micro,” said Santa. Laurence asked for an explanation why. “David Byrne chose it too. The rumors of him having one are true as he got it from a potion he drank before on purpose, and he got in some top notch Illuminati drama which led to rumors that got in the news. Haha, you weren’t there though, little boy, you’ll never know how it felt to be in such a magical land,” said Santa. Laurence says “SAY WHY!!!!!! GIVE LOGIC WHY!!!!!!!!” Santa explained “Tactician knowledge is generated in your mind easier with a smaller one. In many games where you have choices to make, there’s an objective best choice. Life is just one of those games,” Laurence tried his hand at refuting him saying “Then why don’t I come up with the tactics with a small one and change it to a big one when I came up with the tactics and switch back to come up with more tactics when needed?” Santa said “Gagoons… They don’t even know,” and he grabbed a vacuum out of his purse and swept up all the Robux. “You don’t deserve this,” the words splatted out with Santa’s tongue conducting the words with his tongue as the baton. Santa raged “You met with the Robuxian and treated him as a fool. Look at the pictures on the wall.”

Suzie felt heartbroken to let down a hero of Bruce Springsteen’s. But Laurence came up with a theory, “He is just a bad gamer. That is why he likes Roblox so much, since he is unable to switch between small and big through quick action technique.” Suzie felt like God had saved her. No better advice could have ever been spoken. The fact that he said “quick action technique” which is poorly phrased and not an official term by any gaming community only made things better. Laurence continued “He is an old man, and he must be senile. He must’ve done good for Mr. Springsteen in a life long lost.”

It was 3 PM and they went to introduce Laurence to other members.